#kkrambles

[kk-cats]

sometimes i think about how a bunch of people on twitter were getting mad that people thought MK was a kid and saying that's infantilising autistic people and

me, the autistic kid who didn't realise MK was an adult watching people call other people ableist for thinking MK wasn't an adult:

shit.

[fabulaceae]

A quick psych post:

I’ve spent the last fucking decade struggling with adhd and depression and I just had my first phenomenal day since I was 20.

Obviously I know it’s gonna ebb and flow and generally be a process. But dang like, don’t discount the boon of taking actual medication. Your brain doesn’t work, and you’ve lived with it for thirty years and have therefore found some work arounds, but goddamn life just doesn’t have to be that hard either. It’s incredible what a difference one fucking pill has made for me.

[fabulaceae]

the rest of my life is fubar but I got outstanding comments and rating for my 6mo nursing review and my unit director wants to start training me to charge which she says is unheard of for someone with less than a years experience* so I may suck at the rest of my life but my shit is together!!!! When it comes to work!!!!

[fabulaceae]

i am so thirsty for the new trek movie and i probably won’t have time to go see it for at least a few weeks because my schedule was/is as follows:

worked x2 days

1 day ACLS cert class

worked x2 days (yesterday and today)

1 day ACLS cert class (tomorrow)

work x2 days

thursday, friday, saturday, sunday off

BUT!!! i have to move out of my apartment by friday evening, and i move into my new one on sunday so???

i haven’t even really started packing yet?? i’m going to die

BACK TO WORK AFTER MOVING HELL

mock codes for all the baby nurses on my one day off

i keep seeing posts about how it was the best trek??? and got back to it’s roots??? and was wonderful?????????

and i want to die

[fabulaceae]

trying to prep for the graveyard shift by staying up super late but you're just an old granny who's ready to sleep the eternal sleep after 8pm #justshiftworkerthings

[fabulaceae]

#KaylaShittalksDocs: the saga

[fabulaceae]

12 hour shiftin boogie

[fabulaceae]

yesterday was hellish, but here’s two neat experiences that made all the other hellishness from yesterday 100% worth it:

background info: unlike heart transplants who tend to bounce back fairly quickly, the road to recovery for lung transplants is DIFFICULT and LONG. people are often on tube feeds and aren’t allowed to swallow anything for weeks to months. there is unbelievable amounts of swelling. patients often get trach’d and have to be on oxygen post transplant for a long time. chest tubes everywhere. skin breakdown. mucous plugs. bouncing back and forth to the icu. anxiety up the wazoo because doctors cold turkey them on benzos post transplant. etc. etc.

1) there is this patient whom i’ve had on my assignment every time i’ve worked for the last month, so i’ve seen all the shit she’s gone through and gotten to know her fairly well. she’s been taken off tube feeds and allowed to eat, had uncontrollable vomiting, put back on tube feeds, taken off again, aspirated, put back on, etc. not to mention all the other complications like episodes of not being able to breath due to mucous plugs and needing emergency bedside bronchs (a very invasive and highly uncomfortable procedure), infection, poorly managed pain, pressure ulcers, urinary incontinence, post-op necrotic bowel leading to her needed a colostomy bag which has, on at least one occassion, exploded and covered her and her bed sheets in her own diarrhea, so on and so forth. she’s the cutest lady i’ve ever seen and she’s never once complained or been negative which i find absolutely astounding.

anyway having gone through unbelievable amounts of shit (sometimes quite literally) and having a ‘one step forward two steps back’ with this whole transplant experience, yesterday we finally capped her trach (i.e. closed off that additional airway entirely) and took her off of oxygen altogether. in the spirit of monitoring her closely, i was hanging out in her room for awhile, to make sure her oxygen levels were maintaining themselves and that she didn’t become short of breath/distressed and anxious (which, as you can imagine, leads to shortness of breath pretty darn quickly) because as you might imagine this is a highly vulnerable time for LTx’s who desat very quickly and/or tend to freak themselves out over the whole thing. she was doing amazingly well. we got to chatting and she shared with me that this is the first time in 13 years that she hasn’t needed to be on oxygen.

and seriously, every time someone would come in and comment that ‘wow hey you’re off of oxygen!’ you could just see her entire face light up! it was wonderful and i might have had to excuse myself to go cry in the supply room.

2) a gentleman who had been on tube fees/not allowed to eat anything for 3 weeks, passed his swallow test yesterday. the first thing he did was have his husband run down to starbucks and get him a caramel macchiato. i asked him how it was and his eyes literally rolled back in his head as he was drinking it. he didn’t say anything cuz i don’t know that he had anything else to say on the matter and also he probably didn’t want to stop drinking to answer me.

you haven’t seen the face of bliss until you’ve seen someone getting to indulge in their favorite treat first thing after being unable to eat ANYTHING for an extended period of time.

anyway it was a hard day but i seriously love my job and all the highly intimate and personal little melodramas that i get the privilege of being a part of

working on a transplant unit is really cool