#kota.txt

[sasusquatch]

Waking up to the news today like:

[porcellune]

i find it kind of interesting that even among queer people it is difficult to treat trans characters with any sort of gender nonconformity ... i've noticed lately that there are other trans men who act like it is the worst thing imaginable to portray transmasc headcanons as feminine men, bottoms, or even pregnant - particularly with viktor arcane lately - despite these all being characteristics than we Can be.

i understand the aversion to that being the only way trans men are ever portrayed, but i feel like sometimes it is lost that these are not like, corporations or mainstream media portraying these characers like this - these are other queer people, very likely other trans men, portraying characters in a way that suits them and their perception of their gender and identity

like by all means if a cis person is out there only ever showing trans men as a fetish object to be feminized, then yea, get mad at them, but for a lot of queer afab people i think is generally pretty harmless lol

most of my OCs that are transmasculine are androgynous/feminine in their expression and bottoms. but my cis male characters are usually the exact same so LOL. it's just how i prefer to write my characters i portray and relate to.

idk i feel like we typically take the statement of "there should be more masculine/top portrayals of trans men" to mean "there should be less feminine/bottom portrayals of trans men" ... Which is like ... wrong. but it's also a general fandom attitude i notice from some people that in general having a feminine man in an m/m relationship is like somehow not woke enough and even harmful.

maybe if you are very blinded by being overexposed to portrayals of feminine men in fandom spaces you could think this is the 'norm' but in reality feminine men are still extremely marginalized ESPECIALLY IN THE IRL GAY COMMUNITY. it's so bad. masculine gay men are still considered the "better" version of gay men this has been the sentiment since fucking antiquity only a man who was masculine and on top and slept with other men was considered to still be a man and given respect

anyways i love fucking around with gender. these days my own gender's been weird. i still prefer being called he/him but i have never had any issue with fulfilling a "feminine" role in how others treat me i really don't gaf. i would just like to be treated as me and i sort of despite that the way people treat me and expect things of me has changed when they learn i am transmasc. like no nothing about me has changed except the pronouns and the tits i chopped off. im still a princess idgaf

[composing-the-future]

im not letting myself listen to compass before i hear it in canto 5 but its so painful cause my brain keeps repeating the one line ive heard ie MY COMPASS IS CURIOSITY

im just starting canto 4 rn so ive still got quite a ways to go but im hopibg itll be worth it to hear it fully for the first time in canto 5 bossfight

[samdyke]

it’s terrifying.

[qivlett]

people who say that asexuals aren’t real and are only faking it to seem interesting and be part of the lgbt community are dumb

being asexual is the most boring thing ever tbh

i can’t talk about relationships with my friends bc i don’t understand them

i don’t have any weird dating stories

no crushes so i can’t talk to anyone about that

so yeah idk what aphobes are talkin about lol

[sasusquatch]

Caleb Comfort Fluff

(Please excuse the fact that I'm terrible at titling things: this is exactly what it says on the tin, a brief lil drabble about Caleb comforting reader when they're feeling down. My posts still aren't showing up in the tags for whatever reason so I'm falling on the mercy of my friends, especially @mapsthewanderer to help this reach the people it needs to haha. Also please note to anybody reading this that I'm not primarily a writing blog! I wrote this for my friends to help cheer them up and was encouraged to share it in case anybody else could gain comfort from it. Please enjoy <3)

He had noticed it the instant you’d opened your eyes that morning—a heaviness that hung over you, and a forced smile that didn’t quite make it to your eyes.  He didn’t pry, knew that if you wanted to discuss your problems you would have said something, so instead he decided on the next best thing: to pamper and spoil you rotten. 

            You’d mumbled something about wanting to sleep a bit longer, and Caleb had obliged, tucking the blanket closer around you and pressing a kiss to your forehead before getting up to prepare your favorite breakfast.  By the time you awoke again, he had a tray full of food to provide you breakfast in bed, complete with a tiny vase containing a little arrangement of hydrangeas from the garden.  He made small talk with you while you ate, sitting comfortably at your side, watching your features closely to monitor any changes in your mood.  A little light had returned to your eyes, but it was nowhere close to being enough.  That was alright, there were still plenty of things he could do to help.

            After you were finished eating, he drew you a nice, warm bath; making sure all your soaps and lotions and skin care products were within easy reach.  He knew he was being a bit overbearing, knew it might be a little early in the day for such a thing, but he needed you to be pre-occupied and relaxed so he could step out for a little bit.  Before that, though, he helped you to undress and washed your hair for you, the tightness in his own chest easing a little as he felt you lean into his touch as he massaged the shampoo into your scalp.  Once you were settled he gave you a kiss on the cheek and told you he would be back in a bit, and to take it easy. 

            Caleb’s next task was to run to the store and secure all of your favorite snacks.  He grabbed a cart, knowing that a basket would be too small for the amount of shopping he wanted to do, and began making his way methodically down every aisle.  He wasn’t going to risk missing a single thing that you might like.  He was glad he did, too, because he found a bin stuffed full of cute, fluffy blankets in one of the miscellaneous aisles.  The two of you already had a number of blankets already, but, hell, what was one more?  Too many blankets was never a bad thing.  He dug through the bin until he found one in your favorite color and added it to the large pile of goods already in the cart.  He finished the trip by picking out a few gift cards to some of the restaurants he knew you frequented.  This was one of those times he was glad his evol was gravity manipulation, as carrying the vast amount of bags back home would’ve been quite difficult on his own otherwise.

            You had just gotten out of the bath as he walked through the door, back in a set of clean pajamas he had left in the bathroom for you.  Your hair was still wet though—and that would never do.  He gently scolded you and herded you back into the bathroom.  You weakly tried to argue back, saying that you weren’t going to catch a cold if you let your hair air dry, but he was having none of it.  He deftly plugged in your hair dryer and got you sat on the counter.  He clicked the dryer on, making sure it wasn’t too hot, before methodically starting to dry your hair for you.  His hands ran through your hair soothingly, making sure he dried every strand.  Even after he was done he continued for just a bit longer, seeing how relaxed you had become, your eyes shut and head resting against his palm.  Caleb knew too much heat could damage your hair, though, so he finally finished up and helped you back to your feet.  “Come on, I got you some stuff.”

            He led you back to the living room where he’d abandoned the shopping bags previously.  Once there he began unloading everything, basking in your obvious disbelief and the first flickers of happiness that were starting to come back to your frame.  Soon, the coffee table and couch were covered in all kinds of goodies, and you were wrapped in the fluffy blanket he had found.  Caleb had gotten you to sit down and get comfy while he pulled up a selection of movies and shows he knew you loved for you to choose from.  And after you had decided, he plopped down onto the couch next to you and pulled you in close for cuddles.  He felt you heave a sigh as you buried yourself into his side, arms wrapping around his waist.  He nuzzled the top of your head.  “Feeling any better?” he asked softly.

            You hummed.  “Yeah.  Thank you.”

            Another nuzzle.  “Of course, Pips.  You know Caleb’s always here to take care of you, yeah?”

            You nodded, burying your face somehow even further into his shirt, and he laughed softly.  “I know,” you murmured.  “I just didn’t wanna bother you, that’s all.”

            Now it was Caleb’s turn to sigh, and he ruffled your hair gently.  “You’re never bothering me, you should know that by now.”

You groaned and continued to hide, and he just laughed again and pulled you into a tight hug.  He knew that it wasn’t as easy as it sounded, to convince you to let go and stop being so self-conscious.  That was alright, he was patient.  And he would tell you as many times as you needed him to that you were loved and wanted, until the day that you finally fully believed it.

[sasusquatch]

congrats to all the freaky Caleb girlies who won during the new multibanner preview

[sasusquatch]

Driving me nuts seeing so many ppl pan Project Hail Mary (the novel) like okay sorry you're incable of enjoying either 1. Stream of consciousness writing 2. Sci-fi that uses ACTUAL hard scientific fact or 3. Both but like just bc the book isn't for you doesn't MAKE IT POORLY WRITTEN

And a lotta these people in the same breath will praise the latest poorly written, shoddily edited romantasy slop they picked up as the greatest book they've ever read.

Don't even get me STARTEEEEED about the people reading classics and they COMPLAIN ABOUT THE INTRODUCTIONS AND SUPPLEMENTAL MATERIAL LIKE THAT'S LITERALLY GOLD RIGHT THERE, THAT'S TO GET YOUR BRAIN THINKING YOU ABSOLUTE DINGBAT!!!!