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a lil vent / think piece about age regression, mental age versus bodily age & adulthood
trigger warning (just in case): this is a vent & i talk about my sad and confused feelings about the above topics!!
+ if anybody has any thoughts, advice or words of comfort, i’d rly appreciate hearing it… >< 💓 i feel very alone rn.
several sentences someday!
i was tagged by my beloved @sluttyhenley! i am not having the best year for writing but since the ice dance season started up again, please have a snippet from a prospective chapter 1 acotar ice dance AU i may or may not be writing (yes i have another ice dance AU already ignore it i know a lot better this time around)
“Feyre,” he starts, and this must be what it feels like to have your heart break. She thought she knew what it was, but this is a thousand times worse. She bites the inside of her cheek. She can almost taste the iron. Is it blood, or is it still the way she’s coming down from the adrenaline high of skating their season’s best to win the Olympics? And just like before, Rhys is next to her in a moment, holding her wrist to chide her for the habit. He squeezes, not too tight to be constricting, but tight enough that he’s moored her to him. She doesn’t want to look at him, but his fingers under her chin make the choice for her. Maybe it is heartbreak, but Feyre knows Rhys as well as he knows her, and the aching pain is written across his face as plainly as it must be on hers. “Of course I’ll hold your hand,” he says softly. Just for the two of them to hear.
i am tagging @twinkboimler @redbelles @tonyscottchord and anyone else who wants to play!
wip word meme
rules: share one sentence/excerpt from your wip(s) that starts with each letter of the word you’ve been given!
tagged by: @redbelles who gave me SLIP
i have so many wips i cannot count them all, but i am exceedingly lucky in this case (and you, i suppose) that i was able to source all of these from the same kate daniels wip, titled "hugh d'ambray is a wet kitten," coming to you sometime before the heat death of the universe!
Savannah was a stinking, putrid swamp full of irritating bugs and sweltering humidity. He only had himself to blame for staying. He’s not sure why he did: some misguided attempt at sitting ritual vigil at Voron’s side, a hope in a god he no longer believed in that Voron would rise again…
“Let me heal you. Return with me,” Hugh implored. “Beg Roland’s forgiveness and take your rightful place at his side.” Hugh forced more magic into Voron’s abdomen, but the blood did not stop. Voron’s blood coated his hands. Voron pried Hugh’s fingers away from the knife in his stomach.
“It wasn’t about your capability of killing him,” Hugh said slowly. It was like explaining gravity to a toddler. For all that Voron had drilled violence into his second apprentice, it seemed that social awareness was a lesson he failed to pass on to Kate.
Perhaps this was always the fate of Roland’s Warlord; while the Legati slaughtered each other as they clawed their way to the top, the Warlords would be quietly defeated by the daughter Roland swore he would never have.
tagging: @twinkboimler @tonyscottchord @lannisterdaddyissues and anyone who wants to take a stab at it! your word is SLAT
wip tag game
rules: share one sentence/excerpt from your wip(s) that starts with each letter of the word you've been given!
tagged by: @redbelles, who gave me the word SING
unfortunately for you, i am physically incapable of resisting the urge to start a new wip, and so here i lounge, on my throne of unfinished drafts.
[as of yet untitled duke and maria mitchell origin story, brought to you by my "Maverick Mitchell Is Pinoy, Argue With The Wall" headcanon]
She is delightful and everything he's ever dreamed of loving. He knows he wants to marry her when he walks her back to her brother's house, this time with her hand in the crook of his elbow like the polite gentleman his mother raised him to be. Maria blushes prettily, and she kisses like he belongs to her. He'd give her the whole world if he could. when maria kisses him, he feels like he's being shot off the catapult into the open sky on a clear blue day. There is no better feeling.
[we now interrupt your regularly scheduled ladywaffles/lamby fic for untitled and unhinged icemav smut]
If Ice hadn’t spent the whole evening riling him up only to deny him before he came, and if Ice weren’t currently grinding his cock into Maverick’s prostate with every shift of his hips, and if Ice didn’t have a hand on his throat, gently squeezing in the way they both know makes Maverick melt into the mattress until all he can think about, all he wants, is to make Ice happy— If Ice hadn’t done all of that, Maverick could have responded in a way that wouldn’t immediately result in Ice tossing him out of the Navy before he took his dick out of Maverick’s ass.
modification over alteration: bradley bradshaw blue-skidoos into an alternate universe where iceman is still alive and married to admiral (?!) maverick mitchell, and bradley's other self looks remarkably familiar... [insert mustachioed glen powell here]
“No, just his better half. I’m supposed to be on leave right now, so uncle duties got delegated to me while Mav gets to wrangle the bureaucracy until I go back to the office on Monday. His luck had to run out at some point,” Ice winks. “You married Maverick?” Bradley asks. He zeroes in on the silver band on Ice’s left hand, a perfect foil to the academy ring on his right hand. Ice twists it off so he can look at it; there’s a string of numbers, coordinates, etched on the inside, followed by a date—sometime in October 2015. “Of course, that’s just the official one,” Ice says as he accepts the ring back. “We’ve been together for much longer than that. I’m surprised that you’re surprised by this.”
dress and tie: a pennymav fic that's been languishing in my drafts folder for Far Too Long
“Good to go,” he tells her. “Thank you,” she says softly. She spins on the balls of her feet to face him. “What do you think?” Pete breaks out into that smile of his, that look that makes her forget every time he’s broken her heart and charms her into giving him another chance. “You’re always a stunner, but this…” he trails off, his eyes bright. “You look great.” It’s the same thing he said to her, when she found him sitting at her bar, but the admiration doesn’t seem to have melted away at all. “Don’t give me that look,” she tells him. I’ll never leave for this date if you keep looking at me like that.
tagging: @sluttyhenley @twinkboimler @starrybouquet @thebaconsandwichofregret and anyone else who wants to play! <3 your word is STIR
don't talk to me about being "doomed by the narrative" unless you are sir mordred, knight of camelot
fanfic writer interview
tagged by: @sluttyhenley thanks honey <3
what fandoms do you write in?
actively this year: top gun and the camelot rising trilogy
dormant fandoms that get 500 word spurts of Gobbets once per fiscal quarter: masters of the air, shadow and bone, mission: impossible (though this one will likely get More attention next year once m:i8 drops)
how many words have you published in 2024?
9,950. which is the lowest my word count has been in a While but it's mainly because i wrote a lot of drafts this year that i have yet to publish
what is your greatest achievement this year?
creatively, it is 100% starting The Care of the Flyer. i really do love how much love it gets from everyone, despite its intended audience being me and two tumbleweeds (who know exactly who they are). i'm very proud of how much research and Effort i put into it.
personally, it's the fact that i was the first person to publish a fic in a new ship tag.
what are your top three fics you've written this year?
conveniently, i have only published three fics this year. would you look at that.
The Care of the Flyer
some kind of secret
tell me my story
what was your biggest pit of despair moment?
at some point around the end of october i realized that i had not written a Single Word in any project or silly little promptfill for almost 2 months, which was Not A Great Feeling. i then proceeded to not write anything until the end of november. oof.
what have you learned?
baby's first smut fic got published this year, so how to write smut is definitely a lesson i learned. i also did a lot of work in character motivations, since flight surgeon!maverick in Care of the Flyer is a much different mav than the mav we know from tg86/tgm. it really was a good exercise in examining what drives a protagonist (maverick) to do something, and how they would react to different circumstances (namely, iceman).
did you beta any fics? any faves you want to shout out?
i did! i beta'd for @starrybouquet on in for a penny, in for a pound, her fem!maverick AU. i also do a lot of spot betas for @twinkboimler in helping to restructure sentences, find intended meaning, etc.
what three fics have you read this year that you love?
to leave this all behind (halo round his head) is maybe everything i wanted from a crown of candy but did not get. lapin is far and away my favorite character in the campaign, and knowing that zac had thunder step prepared but didn't get to use it because of the death saves hurt my soul so bad. this was a soothing balm.
the last scene in when the time comes lived in my memory for weeks after i read it, and then i didn't bookmark it like a dummy. i spent the better part of the year trying to find it, only to run across it and rediscover how Good it is when i was hunting down recs for a friend like one of those truffle-sniffing pigs. it's such a beautiful What-If in such a (relatively) short fic. *chef's kiss*
long time followers of ladywaffles may be aware that yours truly is partially deaf, and learning ASL is a life goal of mine. the way that iceman and maverick prioritize learning it in A Good Landing (link) after ice's surgery and the realism in not having the words to explain yourself, despite knowing your own feelings? that's that good shit. also, i'm a sucker for a middle-aged (retirement aged) romance, so this fic checked a lot of my boxes.
what ideas are percolating for next year?
certainly the next part of The Care of the Flyer; i've already sent some snippets of maverick's pithy emails to the group chat, and they've been well received :)
i also want to return to camelot rising and For Real finish the WIPs i started when i was babysitting stinky microbes at my internship
(and also the top gun omegaverse AU that i've had in my brain since february 2023 what who said that)
who do you want to thank?
@twinkboimler for constantly putting up with my moaning about writing in between my complaints about [insert inane everyday topic here]
@sluttyhenley and @redbelles for letting me be the audience to the traveling show, and for letting me fling pasta of all kinds at them to figure out what's fun and funky to write
@starrybouquet for playing in the sandbox with me
tagging: @twinkboimler @redbelles @starrybouquet and you, dear reader, should you choose to accept your mission.
100 movies that made me like this, from childhood until present day. (There's a lot of musicals in there.)
i am not immune to the tumblr trend
how many movies have you seen?
0-10
11-20
21-30
31-40
41-50
51-60
61-70
71-80
81-90
91-100
last line challenge
tagged by: @redbelles
my deepest apologies to anyone who wanted to get top gun or darklina content out of me in the near future, i read the whole of the camelot rising trilogy in under a week and it is well and good Stuck In My Craw
Excalibur was sucking the magic out of everything it could touch, and Mordred refused to let it touch her, even as the prickling, tingling sensation of thousands of needles crawled along his skin looking for a way to bleed him dry as well. He grit his teeth to hold in a scream. He would not let Arthur know how much the sword’s capabilities hurt him. His life had always been full of pain, and this was just one more instance of it. Guinevere’s fingers curled into his cape, as if she were looking for something to cling to. Her eyes were glassy and unseeing; he could not tell what she saw, but it terrified her.
i am tagging @twinkboimler and @sluttyhenley and anyone else who wants to play!
