#letskillkurtcobain

[beyondthebackup]

You're a failure.

"Me?

You sure…?

No one’s ever told me that before.

experiment…prototype…psychopath…parasite…delinquent…murderer…monster…demon chiiild…pervert…mmnn…creep…abomination…the harbinger of the end times…

…nnno, the last one is just what I call myself.

Everything about me is so immaculately disgusting, how could I be a failure?

I refuse to die, everything I touch…rots…all my behavior is a, symptom! Of the sadomasochist sickness that is my mind? Every word out of my mouth is an extended metaphor for an elaborate lie. And my soul, my personality, my hhheart thing…that’sss….that’s all a shapeless, empty, blueprint, to get this husk of a mechanical meat sacks whatever it CRAVES right now. Right now, and also always, I am purposeless and causeless, a twisted caricature of anything and everything that is genius anddd…potential anddd…beauty.

The greatest thing I have ever done - and ever will do - is destroy greatness!

All that…and I’ve failed? Failed…whom?

…You’re right. Henh. Henh. I have. I am. And there’s no escape. I AM A FAILURE! I’m a failure for the ages! I’m the greatest, most successful failure to ever LIVE! No one can ever match my absolute, undeniable FAILURE! It’s been a domino effect across generations of the might-have-been-messiahs of Wammy’s House Incorporated! It’s like they’re my own seeds. All the hopelessly sick little fucks being churned out of that place, suicide bombers, serial rapists, chronic masturbators, tax evaders. I started it all. I’m like Father Time. I’m like…their Daddy.

Daddy…Failure.

Oh God yeah.

I can’t wait until I’m dead. I can’t wait to see who succeeds me as the tumor on L’s legacy, and the tumor of the entire goddamn Earth.

Until then, though…I’m a humanitarian…and I can’t abandon my work."

[deathnote-exchange]

gift for: damnyoukira

artist: letskillkurtcobain

rating: g

prompt: "anything with Beyond."

artist notes: hi, this is your mod writing these notes, because the artists submitted this gift without the form and didn't respond to my numerous messages asking them to send it again with the form. i'm adding it myself now, going off my best guess by looking at your sign up form. apologies for the delay! i hope you enjoy the gift nonetheless!

[diamondregime]

You look like the perverted dude from naruto who constantly pushes his glasses up and fails at training him.

I haven't watched Naruto but I am a pervert

[mister13eyond]

Near, beyond birthday, Alyosha Karamazov, Aslan, Obi Wan Kenobi, and Raskolnikov. I'm expecting a paragraph each. I seriously am.

Since I'm going to be sold as cocaine on account of Alyosha and Raskolnikov and not knowing who they are I'll start with Near @_@Near- He's a DICK. He gloats when he's right, uses people as tools, jumps to conclusions without proper evidence and lets hunches dictate his investigation, no matter whether or not those hunches were right. He rubs people the wrong way- if he wasn't such a cockbag maybe Mello would have been willing to work with him and they could have worked together and surpassed Kira by being a stronger team than individuals. He's also helpless to travel on his own, as evidenced by his asking Rester to make arrangements for him, and from how much he stays inside it's clear he's even more socially inept than L himself was. All in all he's just... he's really really inept at NOT being a dick

Beyond- Oh my fuck where do I even get started? I hate Beyond SO MUCH. He's an IDIOT. What kind of moron thinks the best way to react to snapping over the pressure put on him by being an heir is to go out and commit a triple homicide and then suicide? He put all this work into this big fucking scheme and had no goddamn clue what to do if it failed and he couldn't die, like he NEVER took into account the fact that he might have failed at killing himself. he was also kind of a misogynist- something L himself was guilty of too. He underestimated Misora, assuming he could beat her in a fight and that he could outsmart and control her simply because she was a woman. B is just a huge fuckup all around.

I'm going to be ground into cocaine for never having read the brothers karamazov or crime and punishment, so I've accepted my fate there. 

Aslan- jesus h christ when was the last time I read a Narnia book? Aslan was... As far as I can remember, he seemed massively manipulative. Like he let the kids in The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe witness him being sacrificed when he could have explained himself better. I guess it has to do with him being a Jesus figure, but then I always found the Jesus elements of him manipulative too? It's been a long ass time since I read the Narnia books, I've gotta go back and read those

I just have a feeling I'm going to be detested in so many ways for knowing so few things about the things expected here

if I don't make it to a full paragraph on Obi-wan do I fail?

Obi-wan let's see... I remember him kind of spouting too much wise jargon shit in the old trilogy. I tend to be infuriated by mentor figures who are too enigmatic and shrouded in mystery, who don't come out and tell the truth right away, because I feel like no hero benefits from being lied to. Yoda is a little more upfront, but even he still strings Luke along and lies to him and when mentors do that it drives me CRAZY

basically my point is I think I need to rewatch star wars

and probably failed at paragraphs

OTL

but hey everyone gets to hear how my favorite character in the history of ever is a big stupid dumbass douchebag

[blazingcole-blog]

shout-out to mail for just being awesome

[mister13eyond]

dnrp. as in the rpers.

Oh my god I have to ship rpers

fUCK 

i can't even think of ships

OTP(s)

i remember one time I joke shipped Cole and Mason and then I tried to be their auspistice

that was fun

urh

maybe psy/pinkie pie that totally counts right

Other ships

oh wait I forgot to say me/limbo and we're actually canon

well

I also ship that

oh yeah and mero-chan x her girlfriend CANON SHIPS ARE THE BEST

and I ship everyone together in a tinychat rp BECAUSE I MISS THOSE

Favourite dynamics

uuuuuhm, I dunno! I used to crack up at Cole and Mason squabbling. And I like when everyone gets into big strings of jokes or when tinychat parties happen and all the rpers' muses bounce off one another in really fun ways, MAN do I miss that. I used to have a lot of fun with ZomB just cracking up at everyone and making fun of all the smooching and histories all the characters had together. I miss popping into the chat in the middle of REALLY WEIRD CONVERSATIONS back in the days when I would still find like 400 notifications on my skype any time I left and came back.

Crackships 

A while back someone made up the ship name Buttsareentertainment and I thought that was magical.

Characters I identify with-

uhhhm. I think ruemun and I might have a lot in common. Does that count? I can find things I have in common with a lot of people I've talked to and opinions we share, but I think that's a common part of meeting and talking to people, finding things you have in common.Plus you're all real people and not characters OoO

Any headcanons

I secretly think everyone is a pony. We're ALL ponies typing with our hooves and we just don't realize it.

Something I love about it in general

I loved when the chat was still open and events like tinychat and group RPS happened. I know I never did much rping with anyone but I miss it a lot. I missed how fun and exciting it was, and Rabbit Doubt (rabbit doubt was FUCKING GREAT) and actively posting and having time and... all of it OTL