Jul 6, 2021
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Letter #70
Dear Tori,
How are you doing? I honestly hope you're doing great and that your plans are going well!!
I've been a long time fan, and your songs, especially "worth it" (although I do have to admit "All in My Head" and "Dear No One" were my long time favorites) really speak to me! just as you hoped they would, as you said at one of your shows - I do hope to go to a show soon, but I live in Canada! :/
It's so frustrating, putting in all of your effort into something and not seeing the results or goals that you aimed for. It's even harder knowing that your best wasn't good enough, and although it may have been your fault, there is nothing you can do about it.
I'm having a really hard time accepting that as University applications are coming soon, and I have been constantly stressing about whether or not I'll make it. And what I'll do if I don't. Not only that, but I'm having a hard time accepting the fact that although you can care for a person so much and put so much effort into your relationship with them, some things just won't ever change. Just a lot of things, really.
Everyone always tells me, "Oh, you just have to keep trying", "Don't give up", "Just use that failure to motivate you". But it's hard to keep putting in 100% of your effort and doing everything that you can do and just failing. And honestly, I didn't think anybody else really, actually felt my disappointment. But it's just comforting to know that everyone, even you, doesn't always feel like they are "worth it".
I hope you know that you are worth it!!
Keep doing what you're doing!!! :)
Good Luck and Love from
Kathryn (noogy)
P.S. Simon Cowell didn't know what he was talking about and I have thought so many times that I'm so grateful that you continued even through those hardships! Inspired~
P.P.S. Love your new album!! Me and my sister are obsessed with all of your songs! They're literally perfect :)
Letter #70: King Of The Jungle
Dear Ohio,
It's time to be king.
It's been 9 months since I have worked, what most people call, a regular job. I have been working to find ways to make earn money. ( The US Mint makes money, we earn it) It has not been easy wrecking my brain to think of ways that I could organize my time, energy, and skill to make a profit. Although I have been performing once a week for the last year, I have not made very much money. The government would classify me far below the poverty line.
Why don't you just get a job Antoine?
I've tried to, many times. They just don't work for me. I'm not lazy and I like working to get better at things that I do. It's just that when I spend 8 hours working on someone else's dream, I feel a piece of me die everyday. But then there's an argument of "let your day job fuel your dreams" or "we all have to do things that we don't want to" or even "you're too old not to have any money." I won't pretend as if I have all the answers or even if I'm right about this, but I'm willing to find out.
This takes heart.
I no longer have the luxury of waking up 2 hours before it's time to clock in, clock in and work for 8 hours, and leave. That is out the window. I have to wake up and create opportunities...EVERYDAY. I have to be up early, focused on my goals for the day, and ready to aggressively pursue them. There is no time for hesitation and forgetting about a meeting or taking too long to email someone back. I am responsible for supplying my own paycheck!
I find this to be terrifyingly exciting!
"Every morning in Africa, an antelope wakes up. It knows it must outrun the fastest lion, or it will be killed. Every morning in Africa, a lion wakes up. It knows it must run faster than the slowest antelope, or it will starve. It doesn't matter whether you’re the lion or an antelope – when the sun comes up, you’d better be running."
How can I make money?
I'm going to start with my gifts first; marketing, writing, consulting, planning, speaking, and performing. Are there any books that I can write? Are there any artists who need songs written for them? Are there organizations who need entertainment? Do I know any artists that need consulting? Is there any music that I can sell? What content can I put on YoutTube to make money? If this is going to work, I have to use what people feel are hobbies and monetize them!
How much will I charge?
I asked my life coach that once. He said "How much do you need to make?" As simple as that seems, it's profound. The human part of me says that people will not pay what I am asking for. But I am a child of the Almighty God and He said that He will supply all my needs according to his riches in glory according to Jesus Christ based on my sacrifice of faith in Him telling me to create my own income.
Now, it is time to put my faith into action ladies and gentlemen. If you would like a custom poem for a loved one this holiday season, please contact me @ [email protected].
Please pray for me!
I hope you live before you die,
Antoine Edmonson