If Resident Evil was produced by Witt/Thomas Productions instead of Capcom.
Chris and Leon sit on the couch, sipping tea. Claire is offscreen. Rose enters with a tray of snacks.
CHRIS: Before our parents were killed, Claire and I had this dog. It could do tricks—roll over, play dead...
LEON: Before I moved to Raccoon City, my parents let me keep a pet monkey. It knew a few tricks too—mostly how to pick locks and steal my dad’s beer.
ROSE: Back in St. Olaf, I had herrings that were in the circus.
DOROTHY: (deadpan) Rose, you’re making that up.
ROSE: But it’s true, Dorothy! It was a little like Sea World... But smaller. Much, much smaller.
BLANCHE: (sashaying in) Tell me, Rose... did you ever, um... shoot one of those herrings out of a cannon?
ROSE: Yes, but only on days the singing pig was sick.
Beat. Everyone stares. Leon slowly sets down his tea.
LEON: ...I miss my monkey.