#lieutenantgret

[himbonatrix]

@lieutenantgret one of mine and zions friends sent us a cat boi ring! we can use those to turn ourself into partial but very adorable cats... it’s also our engagement ring, it’s very nice to have it

[theinmxte]

Wal thinks up a lot of things, his mind runs through different scenarios at the speed of sound, and while these scenarios are not necessarily always good--

There is one in particular that...

He spends more time staring at Gret, lately, lost in thought, about questions- big ones. Wal worries asking heavy questions now would be detrimental; it's too soon!, but God does he want to ask them.

it.

Instead, he focuses on setting up for, certain reactions gauge how far he can go.

Does Gret like this geode ring box? does Gret even know what Wal wants to use it for.

The answer to the first question is yes, complete with a soft kiss that splits his face right in half and shakes up his insides.

The second question wasn't important- right now.

A couple of "I love you's" said with sternness, not playfulness, and all those butterflies in his belly turn to fireworks.

[[MORE]]

two quick "I want you's", and you're both curled up with each other, for hours- impossible stamina, but it's the closeness that Wal wanted to get-- and that's... one... way of getting it.

Wal felt like he said I love you too much, so the next best thing; "stay here." "don't leave.", his hands are wrapped up in Gret's and they're as tight to each other as nature allows.

don't leave is the baby version of what he wants to say- it works, but there's just too much energy inside him for it to really... Dissipate, especially since Gret reciprocates- "no, I won't leave.", it makes it worse, harder to contain... and if he squeezes Gret any tighter Wal might just pop ribs.

He cries, of course- very quietly, no sound, just warm tears-- overwhelmed with love and unsure of where to put it all.

The most important thing of all, Wal knew Gret was going to say he'd stay.

He didn't wonder on a maybe, or fear Gret was going to leave, he already knew.

It's a step forward, and they can only get closer.

[xlcedines]

Dear boyfriend,

dear boyfriend; 💚

[[MORE]]

; I'll be honest, I don't know if any of this will ever last, I can't guess on how this will end, if it will end, or if any of it even really matters in the long run; I end up being a notch, a passing boytoy, a big regret, how it's going to effect you, and I care about that, you, but I can say, without a doubt, what I know is; being able to feel, and be reminded, that someone would actually give a damn if I never came home, means more more to me than anything else I've been through, that it tries to rewrite everything I've been taught, that you're somebody who cares so much about someone, you would lend me a shoulder, just to remind me that you want me to come back every night, and that's going to stick around long after anything else leaves.

I didn't think you were even going to want me to stay after the first.

used to think you were just settling. like you knew, out of the three of us, that wal wasn't going anywhere.

I still think about that. I still lay on it and think that it could be truth- but only when I'm alone. when you're there to prove me otherwise, a lot of that other bullshit can't even shake up to the surface.

there is no black tar in the pit of my stomach, not with you.

[theinmxte]

Violence is a constant, pervasive trait Wal has always exemplified, dumb shit like revenge and pettiness were actions that barely required all of his concentration to really make it hurt.

But it helps.

The biggest issue was dealing with the fact people now actually care for you. Back then, in the "good" old days, that didn't matter; no one would be crying buckets of tears if you never came back. Now...

Wal has his fingers in his mouth- mind the fangs, and he chews on the tips of the claws, lost in thought.

He didn't want to bring Gret, not for any monumental reason, just that there's some things he thinks others shouldn't see, and maybe that's wrong of him, but he knows what he has to do, and he can always vividly remember what Lucy looked like when she was exposed to that same kind of violence, --while the situation is a little different, it's the same kind of wonton cruelty.

It hurts him to let Gret see it, to let him come, but he also knows he can't exactly stop Gret from coming either.

What're you supposed to do anyway? Tell him off? Sorry, I took someone else's help and not yours, I thought you were too precious to see this grisly fight, despite being essentially, a freedom fighter, who has most likely hurt people before.

It's just uncomfortable for everybody. All around.

His sweethearts completely impassive face, when they lock eyes, makes Wal a little delirious-- just give him a little bit of effort, Wal knows he looks weird, but you can pretend to like him, right?

Gret didn't sign up for a squeaky white boy, sitting her out in the cold though, doesn't seem to make it much of a problem-- still that "unhealthy" spacing between them of a hand wide, that makes Wal sad, but, they're at least sitting together...

On a roof. Of Fantasy-Land Whole Foods.

Trying to kill somebody.

Ieuan made it, Gret is the one who had to deal with it after the fact... So he gets it. Still sucks.

"So..." Hawkward! "I'm not sure what we're. Actually. Going to do. Here."

Okay, they fight, but like. How.

It's always been for play, not for real.

[theinmxte]

Sleeping will be harder, past visions start peeking their way back into his head. Since they visiting Scotland in the middle of the night- he won't tell Gret that, some kind of.sinking feeling that shakes him into sleep paralysis with nothing but the noises.

Worst case scenario, that shredded, skinless face right next to the edge of his eyes, horse breathing while it looks him over, JUST out of sight.

Nuckalvee's don't give up on prey so easy.

Toxic breathing melts skin, muscle, and bone on his face, leaving nothing but nebulous Sluagh flesh behind, encouraging it, laughing, nickering, holding something right over his head that IT knows about Wal that he doesn't, and whatever it is, is shaped, comically, like a gas station air freshener.

There's nothing for Wal to interpret from that. Not a single clue, and searching for an answer only makes it laugh louder, eventually it's all static and he- might wake up.

Typically.

Typically, he just has to... Wade through it until the sun comes in through the drapes, no rest, and neurotic face touching.

He can't see the reason for any of these visions, any attempt.to remember brings back static, ominous, and all that does is make him frustrated.

Whatever happened in Scotland's Folsom Prison has not yet decided it's finished with him.

[theinmxte]

Wal pulls his arm back in a baseball pitcher's pose, Lassie is watching him, the same gruff and unknowable expression on her muzzle as the one on her dad.

Something to get his mind off things, what things, however, is totally up in the fucking air. Wal doesn't know high from low at this point.

An excessively vague numbness that statics from his feet to his stomach, makes nausea where there shouldn't be any.

Wal pitches the ball, hard, and Lassie charges off at the gunshot of it, barrelling down pretty green fields to catch a sparkly, mottled, ball.

You don't have a purpose, you don't have a reason to be here, a leech, you find the singular open cut in someone and you burrow into it, turn a tiny wound into a festering one- because you can't control yourself? Because you're so self destructive you'll tear apart what you have, simply because there is a pang of how much you don't deserve it in the pit of your stomach?

There it is, and it makes him frown.

Wal has no desire to indulge it, but tension springs on his shoulders and makes him lean just enough to keep hearing it. A monologue of self loathing and pity.

A excessively misguided attempt at chivalry, saving someone from things they don't know they need saved from. Butting in where you aren't wanted or needed, taking rebuff from people you consider friends because you crossed an invisible line.

Cacophonous.

He runs his hands together and stares, pretending to watch his dog, trying to leak all that unnecessary self rage out of his fingertips.

Happiness is a gift, and it's not for you, it's never been for you- the burden of your sins and everyone else's is shackled to your ankles, you do the dirty things so other people don't have to, you suffer from wha-

Puppy! Lassie is back, her fluffy body brushing up against Wal's pantleg, eyes that know and see right through his lockjaw sternness.

Dogs, man. They know shit.

Without a second thought, he goes for the ball and she bounds back, playful.

It's a distraction and he knows it. She knows it.

Cupcake might be a spoiled little brat, but Lassie was some pitiful rendition of Wal is canine form, unusually in-sync.

Her jumping and bobbing starts a wrestling match, old dog speeding around like a baby, and old man sliding and playing in the dirt with her like he didn't ache from hip to shoulder.

The ball ends up in Gret's pool, oops, and she is trapped in a very meek headlock, waving her open maw around near Wal's face- A little dangerously! Don't put your face that close to animals face, kids! That's how you get stitches!

She yowls, Wal mocks her. It's silly and brings about a calmness, they walked through the first of the hurricane and now they can sit in the eye.

Come midnight, he'll be back there again, sitting up in bed with his forehead in his hands, griping about a migraine, even if he and Gret both know that's not what it is.

He can still smile, Gret can still tell him that things will be fine and they'll be supportive of one another, and Wal can scoff and roll his eyes to dismiss it. Then get dragged back to lay down in a chokehold. Easy.

It's going to take years before he starts believing anybody when they say good things.

Seven years out of prison where nothing mattered, and those wounds are still fresh as ever, raw and grotesque.

But, nobody seems to mind.

[pluvicor]

#The comments from your husband were very cute. #You look very good.

right??? rickons love is literally the best thing in the world for me

[mesonoxianmonster]

@lieutenantgret here have Sugarcharmshop gourmet she doesnt upload anymore but its still good!

I mean its pretend food but still looks good!