Higher by Audrey
She’s heading for something that she won’t forget. As a young girl, Audrey never fully understood the future and what it takes to be the best. All she ever wanted was fabulous and fashion and fun, she plays dress up and make-up and then contemplates whether she should re-watch High School Musical or Barbie Diaries for the fiftieth time. Little did she know, those magical, whimsical days will be skeptical and unethical in the future.
Audrey does not see the world with a wide variety of eyes, only seeing what she thinks she sees. Studying isn't for her and she doesn't understand why she should have to study. She had so much trouble with math and was drowning in the multiplication table. Her mother wanted to show Audrey that she had so much potential that she wouldn't believe it. So, she signed the young girl up for a tutoring session. Spoiler, it didn’t work.
The tutor wasn’t terrible, but Audrey was, that the teacher gave up on her and just gave her the answers to the questions. She had to switch to four different tutors because, well, they said they couldn’t handle having three students, but now she knows, it was because she was difficult to tame. She’s always in a different world, spacing out every minute, and the sound of her surrounding goes from one ear to another.
Audrey never understood that her life depends on how she was academically doing in school. And in a blink of an eye, standing in front of a huge school, the world changes. It was such a culture shock for her to see her classmates so down to having good grades. Everyone was reciting, they know the answer to this and that, and then there was her, in awe of everything she was going through. She had always struggled with math and now that she was in her freshman year in high school, the numbers that she didn't take seriously were a big deal.
The class moved so fast, she didn't understand anything that they had covered in the lesson. She failed every test and couldn't get it together. Audrey’s parents were very upset with her, they didn’t want to see their little girl struggling. She was under so much pressure that she skipped days at school and stopped fulfilling her church duties. It was terrible. It was like a scene in a movie that you would want to skip right away because it was giving you secondhand embarrassment. She was battling life with an army of one and the only dagger she had was caught by her nemesis.
The day of card giving came by. The wind rushed to her skin, and everything was cold around her, the word mathematics and numbers seven and five were the only things she sees. Her math teacher calls for her. Audrey suddenly felt like a balloon and had full contact with a needle. “If you need help with anything, I can always tutor you.” Her teacher said and that was Audrey’s last straw.
As Audrey closes the door, she runs to the bathroom and enters a cubicle, tears streaming down her eyes like the water when the Titanic fell apart. The quiet restroom was filled with sobs and regrets. She regretted not taking things seriously, she regretted being a dumb kid, and she even regretted every laugh she laughed. For a moment, life felt real to her.
Having no regrets is all that she really wants. But then, if we think about it, it was all for the plot. The movie just got to the climax and life was great after. She was proud of herself for almost failing math– because now, she found herself loving something and if that moment did not happen, would she be writing this now? She learned to not take everything too seriously and that there is life after school. It is not just about having good grades, but about life itself. A day will be perfect for you to be imperfect, but you will never be perfect.
