How do I know I'm aromantic?
Besides the cosmic horror I feel thinking about myself having a "normal life" with a spouse?
Well, the feeling of absolute nothing when I get told "you're very important for me" or "you're my light".
The only reason I don't run away immediately is because we're far and we actually meet one or twice a month, and in those meetings we fuck. And you're married (poly)
It's not that I don't care about you, I do. That's why it doesn't fill me with horror knowing I'm that important for you. But also the distance between us. That's what keeps this relationship safe.
I've already told you that I don't fall in love, but I never explained to you further than this. I didn't think it was necessary, and at this point I will not because I don't want to hurt you. Distance keeps me, us, safe, and that's enough.