Importance of being Supportive Parents
I am glad that I grew up in such a family where my parents are super supportive of my brother and I. I can still remember, when we totally did not have any experience in cooking and they would just let us use the kitchen. With close watchful eyes, they will observe us while we do our stuffs... but never will they say a word to correct whatever we did unless is it a threat to our safety. If it turned out good, we were given praises... if it turn out bad, they will never say “You do not know how to cook” and forbid us to use the kitchen ever again... instead, they will still eat up and affirm us with a smile on their faces. This was how we were brought up. And I am super proud of it.
My parents are strict, and we were terrified of them. When I was young, I always tell myself, “I will not grow up to be such terrible parents”. However difficult it was, my brother and I would obey them. Follow the curfews set by them. Tell them whenever we are going out and who we will be out with. And, of course, tell them when will we be finished. My parents would come and pick us up on time and we will gladly (sometimes sulking) leave whatever we were doing and enter the car.
Although they we strict with us going outside but they had full trust that we will not go to places like cyber cafe, hangout with people of bad influences. I was glad they did. They encouraged us to go for activities such as camps, and courses or church activities at night (although they were super protective). Never once, they will force us to work during school holidays (my first job was during a PC Fair after Form 5; then a clerk in a lawyer firm after Form 6). All they want from us was to study hard and not to worry about money.
Of course, I had my rebellious phase somewhere during Std 3 where I wouldn’t do my homework, and lie about everything... I got beaten, scolded and caned for that. I was terrified when dad asked to check my school bag. Sometimes I even hide my homework at school. After Std 4, I was *miraculously but not completely* a change person. I loved going to school. No problems academically although I did still rebel sometimes. Nobody is perfect.
But one thing that’s for sure, however difficult my childhood was... however strict my parents were... I know that now, I do not have the “I will not grow up to be such terrible parents” thought anymore. Instead, I want to bring up my kids with the same way as they did because if it is not for them, I am not who I am today. It they would have bought me up in the “My parents were strict so I am not going to be strict with my kids” attitude, I wouldn’t imagine how my brother and my life will turn out. I love my parents and I want to be like them.
I do not know what drove me to write this post but I would like to advice to everyone (especially parents-to-be or parents) is that NEVER EVER discourage your kids. They want to cook, let them cook. They want to play, let them play. But with watchful eyes. Be strict, yet supportive. They will thank you when they grow up. But if they don’t it is not your fault. They just needed some other life lessons to mature. Also to kids, treasure your parents. Appreciate them. They have reasons to be strict. Be patient, because they are also having a tough time to understand you. Most importantly, Love them.
Dad and Mum, if you’re reading this, I love you alot. And Thank you.