How would the self aware hsr react to reader playing hi3 or re-downloading it considering a lot of hsr characters are variants of the ones in hi3.... totally dont wanna imagine Phainon getting jealous over the reader loving 2 other white haired blue eyed characters with flame swords and the burden of the world on them
LMAOO torture him by spending time with his clones, torture him by spending time with his honkai counterparts...
"ANYONE but phainon himself"
—Reader, 2025
You leave, as usual, again, which is really not too surprising anymore... Even if it remains extremely heartbreaking for the Deliverer.
This time, though, his Partner, who seems to know and follow more or less everything you do, looks puzzled as well.
"Oh? New log in?" She tilts her head in confusion, closing off the game she was playing upon the notification, "...The hell's this?"
Phainon, curious, leans over her shoulder to see... Oh, it's that app she uses! To stalk you see what you're doing!
"Are they playing that..." He can't help but scoff as the blonde person intrudes into his thoughts again, "...Ah... Other one?"
He definitely sounds like a wife being cheated on.
Stelle seems to take notice of that too, amusement flashing in her eyes as she squinted at her teleslate screen, "Nah. This one's new, I think?"
Sure. New one. Another knife to his heart. Just go ahead and hang out with everyone across the multiverse but HIM, won't you? It's not like he's staring into the walls of the Express, praying to any and all beings he's learnt of in hopes of bringing you back. Not at all.
The picture and people are strangers to him, this time (but at least it's not those he's deemed rivals!). A white haired girl, with features admittedly similar to his, and two others behind her—actually, has he seen those two before? The silver twin tails, or that long, purple hair...
Regardless, Stelle whips the screen towards herself before he can ponder on it.
"... Let's leave them to it. I'll check into their screenshots later."
He wants to see what in the world it could be that distracts you from being there, with him, with Stelle, but for the sake of his already wounded pride, he merely nods at the suggestion.
"...Right. I'll get back to Okhema in the mean time. But—"
"I'll let you know what it's all about, yeah yeah, get back to your deliveries."
It's around two hours later when Stelle knocks on (read: kicks through) his door, biting her lip as if to hold in her laughter, actual, genuine tears gathered in the corners of her eyes as if she's been waiting to burst into laughter all day.
She doesn't even say hi, let alone explaining why she would do that to his door. Just hands him her telestale, and...
It's Mr. Yang? In a dress. And some blonde... Woman? And...
...
White hair, blue eyes, same jawline, same nose, is that—
Phainon finds his cheeks redden in embarrassment at the sight of himself looking as if he's about to burst into song, "Partner, why would you draw this..?"
His amused, if a bit shy, question, however, is met with the dam finally breaking.
Stelle doubles down as laughter spills out, loud and long and almost hysterical, all the while the poor Deliverer awkwardly stands in his own house, staring at a picture of himself in a dress Hyacine would find too frilly to wear.
(Oddly enough, he doesn't look bad. Right?)
He sighs.
Well, it's just Stelle. She enjoys her pranks and jokes. This isn't too odd for her. You've been gone for a while, after all; even she seems to be losing her sanity—he can't judge her or anything, he's not much different.
Until she speaks up in between the laughter;
"That's—" wheeze, "T—That's... From that new one...!"
He squints at the picture, trying to decipher whatever drink might have gotten her to the point of having imagined previous conversations on whatever this was related to, until it hits him.
There HAS been a previous conversation, just an hour or two ago, about your new little project, right?
But surely...
He feels his face heat up even more, this time feeling more flustered than embarrassed, "W—What is this even... Wait, is that actually me?!"
Stelle shakes her head while wiping her eyes, "Nah, just... Well, I guess he's like you? Kinda?"
"Partner—"
"Okay don't freak out too much, it's not ACTUALLY you anyway—"
"—Partner do they—"
"But like I guess this is what they're—"
"Do you think they want me in a dress????"
The question, one he asks with utter seriousness despite his red face, seems to take Stelle off guard.
She starts hysterically laughing again.
"Honestly?" She wheezes out again, "You know what? Maybe. Hell, there's this—this girl—"
Phainon lets her as she grabs the teleslate and taps a few times in that weird app, before showing him the white haired girl from before; the one who shared a few too many facial features with him...
"Partner," Stelle says, a mischievous grin on her lips and stray tears on her cheeks from all that laughing, "Maybe they'd just—like you better if you were a girl, huh?"
Ah.
So that's what you want.
... Probably.
He could... Try to change his wardrobe. A bit. With Aglaea's help.
(Once Stelle sits down to explain what she's gathered on this new game of yours, Phainon feels like you just enjoy messing with him, he really does. Especially with your interest in these two other white haired people with burdens so similar to his own. He could have three versions of himself roaming around, and you'd still seek for more of him...)
I love your sahsrau so much it's living free in my head! May I ask how they would react if they realize you kind of auto battle while doing sth else?? Like personally I tend to play Love and deepspace at the same time, imagine Phainon is being ecstatic thinking you are watching him destroying enemies for you and then he heard a women voice singing" Some long for longevity, before fading to duusst ~" but the worse is that he hears a GUY TALKING ?? Calling you "pipsqueak / kitten / Miss bodyguard / etc" ????? He kills enemies so quickly you barely had time to say hi to the boys in lads.
I also kinda wonder if Genshin characters are also self aware that would be chaos, Lumine waiting for you to come back but realizing you are kinda stuck in hsr ??? Imagine all the characters you pulled being also heartbroken, Kaeya was your first main but you quickly abandon him for Diluc of all things! Tartaglia was able to stay for a while bc of the international team but you recently remplaced him for Neuvillette, is it because he lost against him??? But it wasnt a fair fight!! And he fought the Narwhal for days, doesnt that mean sth to you ?? Albedo biting the dust in your account was fine with it, but with the recent Nodkrai patch, you start to use him again and he's happy about it. And with the new buff, you will play him even more right ?
Then they start realizing you who usually log in daily doesnt for a week now, they ask Lumine where you are and she's like " Well, it seems like they are stuck in hsr ? "
How do they get you back ??? And into Teyvat ??
This post got a bit too long lol but I had sm fun thinking about these !! THE LADS THING ESPECIALLY IS SUCH A FUNNY IDEA LMFAOO .... Let's say this is during your occasional farm visits, some time after you first pull phai—
Sure, things aren't as... Stable, or as regular as Phainon would like them to be, but at least you're there...! Sometimes.
This time, however, you're abnormally quiet while setting up the team. He's included, of course he's included, so he doesn't care too much either way, but it's unusual for you to not at least have that silly giggle when he's doing his best to look presentable for you! Or even that off-key humming. Or like. Anything. He misses your voice. Please just, like... Sigh??
He gets to destroying each enemy, trying to hit harder and harder since you seemed to like that last time—maybe he can wipe off the whole lineup in one attack? Of course he will. He does.
Yet, you're... Silent. Still, no words, no nothing, aside from... Music? A lady singing? Definitely not your voice though. Then again, maybe you just want some background music while watching him obliterate his enemies like some male bird trying to get your attention with horrible dance moves; that's fine! Should he... Like... Try to hit on beat ??
Then, he hears it. Some guy. Huh.
"Are you curious about the secrets buried underneath, Kitten?"
—Sorry, "Kitten" ?????????
"Oh my God." Stelle gasps, her attention on the voice all of a sudden... Once she slaps an enemy away with her book shut tight, "Did... Did they..."
Phainon grunts as he takes a head off, still too busy with the fight to look up (in a somewhat desperate attempt to please you), though his attention is definitely not on the blood he spills, "What? Did they what? Who's that???"
"...Get a boyfriend? Is... Is that what's happening?"
Phainon stops dead in his tracks, the body from before falling limp at his feet.
what
"Did... Oh. Uh."
He... Sort of... Never considered that before, actually. He's pictured you a being similiar to something of unfathomable power, someone he wouldn't usually picture doing such humane things as...—he wouldn't know! Cuddling? Going on dates? Gasps. Holding... Hands?
He supposes he's heard you complain about rather mundane things before, and he knows you have friends, but... It never occured to him you may have someone special. He didn't think you would, actually.
Huh.
That's.
Phainon doesn't really like that. Or maybe he just doesn't like the petname. So demeaning, isn't it?! You should have a better partner. An equal. Not someone who treats you like that..!
He hears your familiar giggle then, finally!
"Aww, I've missed you! Shouldn't have ragequit after those horrid pulls, I guess..."
???
Pulls...
It dawns on him, and Stelle, and Sunday, and Dan Heng then. The entire team.
You're playing a game. Something else. After you left them to fight some monsters.
Actually hold on a second, Phainon heard about something like this from Castorice, hasn't he? Is that a—
"Dating sim..." Stelle unknowingly finishes his thoughts, "They're playing some dating sim. After leaving us like this."
Something akin to amusement flashes in Dan Heng's eyes, "...You really are similiar to them, then."
"Whuh- What's that supposed to mean?!"
Phainon doesn't really hear the rest of that conversation... Or Sunday's grunting. He sort of doesn't care to.
Dating sim... Those games where you romance the leads, right? Those flowery, romantic ones. Or—Oh, Titans, what if it's the other kind? The... Less cute stuff Castorice gets really embarrassed about???? Is that what "underneath" meant?!
No. Nahh. Surely you don't like that corny guy that much, anyway...
Hey did he just hear a moan—what are you giggling about right now ????
He ends up defeating the enemies so quick you have to keep restarting the cycles. You grumble about not getting to talk to this "Sylus" without interruption, but hey—
Your irritation is much better than your ignorance.
And about the genshin thing—no lie I hadn't thought abt how Lumi would know about your account etc like Stelle does, since she doesn't really have any ?? Devices ????? So I'll be even sillier about this and say your actions appear in her Adventurer's Handbook. Magical books aren't that odd in Teyvat anyway lalala (humor me...)
Let's say reader's horrible abandoning habits are just as bad in Genshin; you know what that means? A lot more salty exes.
Juuuust what you need. Because of course, Sunday is never enough. When has he ever been enough? Just end his misery.
So let's do a quick review...
Poor, poor Kaeya being demoted into a support for DILUC of all people, only to be kicked out not long after 😭😭 He never gets a break from his family drama huh. He's gotten used to being thrown aside, he'd almost say he's used to it—hey, at least it's his brother you're throwing him aside for... Until it's not, and Diluc joins him on the defeated losers bench....
He had started off so good too. Being your beloved DPS for so many weeks, helping you take your first steps into his world! Isn't that lovely? Sure, he was a bit freaked out about the honorary knight telling him he may hear voices sometimes, but if that voice is yours? He'd love to hear it at all times. But he doesn't. He's cursed to become your ice-bridger... Until you pull Furina...
Childe, Tartaglia, Ajax; whatever you may call him, is mostly disappointed in himself more than anything else. He's been with you for a long while, you've helped make him much stronger than anticipated, hell—he's actually pretty decent with a bow nowadays! You've contributed much to his mastery of all fighting skills, so...
What the hell happened that made you bench him?
Neuvillette—The lizard. That's what happened. One day, Tartaglia wakes up and oh, wow, he's just. Fired, essentially. Because you have a shinier hydro user now. It definitely pisses him off a bit—especially with how he's recently fought with the guy. Is that what this is about? Did you decide to replace him because you came to the conclusion he was weak? That was an unfair fight, he'd think, but... Still. He lost, he lost. Fine. He wasn't strong enough... So what to do?
Be better. Be stronger. Beat Neuvillette. Hard.
(Good luck to Neuvi in avoiding a certain ginger's challenges in the upcoming days...)
Albedo seems fine with dealing with rejection, considering what sort of a "Mother" Rhine has always been lmao; Hate to inject my HCs here, but I feel like he's developed a sort of superiority complex about it, actually. He survived, he was the perfect human, the one to make it out alive and into society, not Dorian, not Durin—I thought he had a sort of empathy against Durin in earlier versions but. Like. Latest quests... Also that "is it murder if what I kill isn't human" thing like ?? He's coping. You pull him, you use him, you explore with him, you love him! And really, all that does is sorta affirm his already not very healthy thoughts lol. So when you end up abandoning him very early on because sorry man, he's not the best fighter..! He's actually not quite used to that. What's he supposed to do with being the abandoned one. Lol. ?? if being the perfect experiment is what got him his current life, what does it mean when someone so integral to Teyvat's existence rejects him?
And then you get him back in your team once he's done with Alice's little quest. Was that it? Has he finally done it? Can he feel a bit secure now, or ...???
And then whoops, you're gone. Like. For an oddly long time..? He's not sure what to feel about that part. On one hand, he's made it back into your teams! On the other... You're gone.
Lumine, sweet, darling Lumine, been with your for—what is it, 5 years now? Before Stelle, or anyone else really, she was there with you! Lumi trusts you to be her guide through Teyvat, even though Paimon claims she'd make a better guide anyday. Best travel guide in Teyvat, duh!
("Paimon, I don't think they're exactly in Teyvat, though..."
"Well, Paimon's the best travel guide in AND out of Teyvat then!")
Regardless of what other projects you pick up, whoever else you may choose to guide, you come back to her. She's pretty secure in that, and, well, she should be. Even if you're not the most consistent, you ARE always back to her. Every time.
Usually.
So.
What happens that makes you leave for so long, with NO log-ins to any other one of your projects..?
That's a bit... New for you. Were you... Socializing too much or something? She did hear you mention a few things about your work and friends recently, so maybe..??
"Huh-" Paimon tilts her head as she looks at the Handbook over Lumine's shoulder, "Wait a minute, did they ever log out after this?"
Lumine looks over to the records Paimon's little fingers point at, and.... Sure enough, it just says you logged in a few weeks ago... Had you been helping out Stelle all this time? Why?
Admittedly, she doesn't understand how exactly your universe shifting or the omnipresent voice and presence work, but she DOES know you don't do it for too long at once. It had been weeks though.
...
She wonders, what would a hypothetical friend think if she were to "visit" Teyvat, and then not come back for 5 years?
...Could someone from that universe trap you over there, she can't help but wonder. Much like what happened to her? But—nooo, pft, that's silly. You're too much of an outsider, a force not even the archons sense unless you let them.
Unless this other universe has... Even higher beings? Could it be?
She's no stranger to those, she supposes. Perhaps staying so long in Teyvat has made Lumine forget what threats lay outside Teyvat.
"...Could they be stuck there?" She ponders out loud, earning a surprised yelp from her white haired companion.
"No way! Could they...?"
It's cute, Lumine has to note, how Paimon worries over you even if she's expressed hostility against you before. Once you stop contending for her place as the best travel guide in (and out of!) Teyvat, the little fairy likes you quite a lot, after all.
"I don't know the details of what beings there are, in that realm..." Lumine speaks again, mostly thinking out loud, "But if that's the case, we should help them, right?"
Paimon nods her head up and down, as fast as possible, "Well—they've helped us a lot, right? It's only fair! Aw, they must be so scared..!"
As for the "how" issue... Be it Skirk, Alice, Nicole, The Archons, The Sovereigns—Lumine does know a lot of powerful people. Her brother said it himself, they will always have enough time.
You, though... Might have to be a priority for now.
She might also have to let some others know before they lose their minds. Over worry or anger or a broken hearts, she can't tell.
("Are you alright? This is the fifteenth time today... Should I call Hyacine?" Phainon asks, brows furrowed in clear, adorable worry as he hands you another napkin. You chuckle at his enthusiasm to help your sneezing, and take the napkin with a smile, "I'm good, I swear... Probably just allergies.")
I'm not sure if you take requests but what would happen if phainon met the other phainons😂 (coming from someone who has phainon on all 5 of their accounts)
Honestly i also dunno if I take requests lmao but this is cute to think about !!
His sense of self is pretty shattered already, with Flame Reaver this and Khaslana that, so on one hand, learning he has duplicates isn't thattt extreme of a revelation.
Then he thinks about it.
Those Phainons probably also want your attention, right? That won't do. That won't do at all! You barely look at him nowadays, what do you mean you have to share him with—FIVE OTHER COPIES OF HIMSELF ???
Actually, he calms (gaslights) himself, actually that's fineeee. That's fine. He doesn't mind that, haha. If it's him that you spend your time with, any version of him, maybe it's not so bad. At the end of the day, that means you care for him after all. You're not running after anyone else; it's just you and a few duplicates of himself. And knowing he has your affection is really all he wants, so...
Then again... Why do you have multiple Phainon's across multiple universes? Is he not enough? Is he, Flame Reaver and Khaslana not enough to satisfy you? He technically has 33 million extras of himself, if you wanted more of his clearly gorgeous face to look at, you should've said so!
If by some force, God forbid, there happens to be a glitch that causes your accounts to collapse into each other, for Phainonlings to meet each other... Yeah there's a good chance he's just eliminating the others, sorry.
(...Can he do that? If they're all the same person, with the same strength...)
(He does NOT know about relic builds. Shame on him.)
Phainon is a patient man. He's used to waiting, and waiting, and waiting, but Titans help him if he spends one more second waiting for you to look back at him, and away from the other copies..!
(The other Heirs are mostly confused as to why this lovable, mischievous man is so hostile to himself all of a sudden. Stelle, however, simply grabs her popcorn.)
Their beef with Genshin kills me every time omggg. Is it just phainon or the others too?
Most of the others don't even know about it lmao 😭😭 Stelle's the only one able to access your hoyo acc, and therefore your hoyoplay etc, so unless she talks about it... They lowk just assume u've abandoned them for more or less no reason. ouch!
Phainon was a particularly bad case since day one, it's never been hard to tell, so he gets to know about it; because Stelle would eventually have to tell him anyway, he's not one to just give up and move on. The others she's had to tell would probably include Aventurine, Sunday, maybe Topaz? Or maybe Stelle's let Topaz keep working harder as a coping mechanism instead of trying to let her down lol? Then again, Stelle's always been the one to strive to rive in reality no matter how bad it may be, so let's say Topaz also knows.
Frankly, with his entire life purpose and future plans thrown into the burning pile of trash located where his pride used to be, AND his contact with Robin cut, Sunday was already a bit sick of everything. Then you come around. He gets some hope for once. Then you leave. That, probably, is his limit lmao. Oh you've decided to leave him, to shatter his pride and joy into the ground so you could frolick around in forests and play with silly magical girls or whatever this "Teyvat" could possibly have to offer that he didn't? Fine. Whatever, dammit, fine.
(Stelle tries to comfort him a bit, or maybe she's messing with him, by saying "oh hey, maybe they're just playing with this other guy who looks like you and who also has a sweet little sister ?? Haha ????" but all she gets is a cold, cold glare)
He's bitter, he's salty, then you actually step into the Express and STILL show worry for this other world of yours? Are you mocking him? Is that it?
Overall, after everything... Yeah he still doesn't like the idea. Sure, Penacony and, well, his universe in general doesn't have that natural, magical beauty element Teyvat seems to have, but they have charms too, don't they? Should he get a kimono?? Is that what you want from him ?????
(He'd like to visit there, beneath all his confused feelings over you and therefore your involvement in Teyvat. It sure seems to be a sort of paradise, with all those friendly faces... So similiar to the tales told by his mother, and the paradise he's dreamed of with his sister.)
Aventurine respects your hustle (you have no hustle, him and Sunday just geniunely thought you were a neglectful asshole for no reason) so frankly. It's almost impressive how you're messing with him on one hand, then leaving to play with your other toys, only to occasionally come back to him! You've got a good system (you have no system you're just playing whatever seems more fun that day). If you were to ask for anything, you'd have so many believers at your feet, after all! Clearly it's working well. He's taken a look through Miss Stellaron's phone, just a small, non-ill-intentioned glance to get a feel of who your other little toys may be—it's not like he could gather that info from literally anywhere else, after all! Miss Stellaron's technically responsible for his (at that time, non-existent) communication with you!
He doesn't see the appeal.
The land seems comfortable, yes, but much less luxurious to anything his universe had to offer, though, he has to admit, it looks... Relaxing, at least. Some sights seem almost familiar—those photos you've taken in the desert especially.
The people, however, seem a bit like a shady, don't they? That blue haired man with the eyepatch—what a smirk! It's clear from any angle he's the type to break your heart. Oh, or that innocent looking blonde, who you've photographed getting drunk... Wait, what do you mean he's broke?
Overall, he would say there's a clear winner. Surely you have better taste than that? Right? (Come back???)
Topaz thinks Teyvat is lovely. It's totally not JUSTTT because of the critters, not at all...! She doesn't wanna join you over there haha. Where did that come from. But like. She wouldn't mind if you brought over some of those fluffy capybaras. Or those cute baby dragons!! Ah, what a shame...
The sights seem lovely, the animals seem so whimsical, she gets why you would want to be there, she really does.
Doesn't change the fact that she feels a bit envious and maybe bitter about it. So what, you get to work together and then you abandon her for your vacations ?? Rude ?????
Stelle does her best to explain it's not up to you to get them there, but really, if you were actually sorry about it, you'd get her one of those blubberbeasts. Since that's not the case...! So you truly don't care after all!
That's fine. She'll make you care, eventually, once she becomes indispensable to your teams!
Stelle is fine with it. Really, she's accepted she's not your one and only, as much as that makes her sound like a wife whose spouse is cheating on her. That's not the case. You just like your little adventures, and meeting new shiny people, and all that awesome elemental magic and the ability to jump—she gets it. She can't cover your every need. That's fine.
I mean, that's what she tells herself of course, but really she's sort of salty about it. Lumine seems like a sweet girl, but please, does she have the adorkable Stelle charm? No she doesn't . No one has that. Come to your senses. More importantly, come back! Astral Express is as much of a family to you as they've been to her, after all! No matter the complex consistent overarching lore or shiny climbable walls, you'd always like the people over here, with Stelle, more. Totally. Definitely. Please. Listen she doesn't have a lot to offer in comparison but she's taller and could, theoretically, kiss your head if you were to stand next to her and Lumine can't do that SO STELLE WINS DAMMIT!
When/if word gets out that the player is in the astral express are any of the other ‘abandoned’ characters gonna want to visit?
The first plan would be to keep quiet about the whole thing, especially when it's certain to cause a lot of problems; all of a sudden, the Express is hosting someone, against whom half the influential figures in the universe holds rather strong feelings towards! Imagine finally succeeding in getting phai and sunday to get along and you're like "phew, finally we can all be friends!!!"
and then the Express door opens to show Aventurine with a rather disingenious smile.
No thanks...!!!!
Howeverrrr March and Stelle do have tendencies to spill things they really really shouldn't spill about...
So let's assume that happened. Word got around. Now you have a bunch of people wanting to.... See you? Kill you?! Who knows?!1?1!!2!
You're far too busy attempting to strangle Stelle when your first visitor knocks on your door.
"Am I interrupting?"
A smug, confident voice, all too familiar from your earlier days in the game—General Jing Yuan...
Like anyone would, you freeze up.
Oh God, you think, If Sunday was that salty about it, then Jing Yuan...
"General!"
You scurry off Stelle, falling to the ground face-first as you do so, before you get up and salute him, as if that might save your dignity.
Once he bothers opening his eyes, the sharp look he gives you is how you remember to not be fooled by the soft, feline-like smile.
You... Definitely have a lot of explaining to do...
Some characters would be more hesitant about visiting imo, such as Aventurine who is bitter and defeated, yes, but also juuust a bit afraid to face you. He's figured out your game (you have none) so why should he bother to go ahead and check on someone who's proven they couldn't care less for his being? Which wouldn't be an issue if you had any benefits to offer, but being here with the others in the Express, living as a regular human... Surely not.
However. Then, he off-handedly mentions the rumours to Dr. Ratio and Topaz.
Dr. Ratio and Topaz, who both show intrigue; Topaz being rather eager and curious, whereas Doctor tries to look calmer, less caring, yet remains obviously interested in the possibility that the rumors may be true.
Then, does he think of a fun game he could play with them. Not that he will inform them, of course—
You may have gotten bored of them all, yes, but Aventurine is nothing if not persuasive and likable. Wouldn't it be such fun to visit you, to remind you of why you adored him, to seduce you if he needed to, if only to mess with his beloved friends? May the best man win! (Or woman!)
(He may be a bit reluctant in admitting he missed the feeling of being geniunely cared for, but that's... Neither here nor there!)
"Hey." Stelle turns to you, "You free?"
"...Sort of, yeah." You nod, not minding the grown man napping on your lap as you absentmindedly handle your dailies (who knew the Starrail Universe had some fun gachas as well... You're truly cursed to juggle 5 of these at a time till you die.)
"Cool. Herta says she wants me to bring you over."
In the sahsrau what are the other characters view on the player? Since you did bring up people like Acheron and Jing yuan?
Honestly, the first part was based on my own account, so I already had those characters in mind while writing, lol. (Though that changed later on since… well. I have more or less everyone on Amphoreus, whereas reader just got E6 S5 Phainon and logged out. 😭😭)
Generally speaking, most of them are like exes you haven’t been very nice to, ngl.
I didn’t plan anything too detailed, but I had some stray thoughts on a few characters. Messy, but here we go;
Jing Yuan, your very first limited DPS, whom you pulled early! — so he had a special place in your heart for a long, long while, and the bastard knew it. He used to have so much fun teasing others, saying how it’s such a shame he always has to work while so many others just sit around and do nothing…!
Then, as it happened with literally everyone else, you sortaaa… lost interest… and dropped the game for a long period. For the first time.
Well, isn’t that a slap in the face!
He’s not new to his friends dying, changing drastically, or outright leaving him, so honestly… he just takes the heartbreak like a champ. He’s a yearner through and through, so yes—he does feel that ache deep in his bones anytime you’re back in the game, so close yet so far, but he deals with it alone, just like he always has. Just another one added to the pile, he supposes…
Aventurine came way later, but when faced with your frankly overwhelming attention, he got… suspicious. Oh, please—nothing happens for free! So he can teleport across the cosmos, join Miss Stellaron on her silly side quests, have some fun, make a little extra credit on the side, and be met with an intimidating amount of genuine love… for nothing? He didn’t trust it. Not that he’d ever say anything outright, since you had so many admirers around, but still.
However, eventually—be it your unending rambles or compliments—he folds. Bad.
Which is why it sinks into his flesh like hot iron when his suspicions are confirmed, and you quickly move on from him.
Well played.
Acheron, confused, moody Acheron… another unit you acquired and promptly abandoned. Frankly speaking, she barely had time to bask in your affection before you all but ran to Sunday, but she found it sweet while it lasted. All the mushy-gushy love words, the silly pictures taken from all angles, keeping her in every battle… for a while! It reminds her of someone else she knew. You still bring bittersweet memories to her mind, but she’s not one to hold grudges—at least not of this kind. She will, however, have that grim deadpan expression on her face whenever you're mentioned. Sorry, out of her control.
Sparkle likes you. No, really—she likes you a lot. What an agent of chaos you are! What a power to hold over people! Your consistent habit of taking people under your wing and then letting them down in such cruel ways is so fun for her. If you ever ask for her help, in battle or during one of those silly events of yours, she’d love to mess things up a bit; perhaps her mischievous touch is exactly what this silly game needs to keep your attention?
Topaz is crushed. At first.
“So I've been working for nothing my whole life?” is her first instinct, but Stelle and Aventurine (…the so-called uncaring colleague…) are quick to help her reframe things, in a much more positive manner. Hey—if she can teleport, she can network, and she can earn extra credits, then what can’t she do under your wing?
It quickly turns into a game for her: a competition to climb the ladder and be your preferred pick for your team! Much like how she respects and admires Jade, she ends up developing a similar feeling towards you. It starts with suspicion, then grows into a sort of admiration as she meets all the people you’ve “acquired.”
(That’s such a horrible word, though. Perhaps hiring is more accurate?)
Then, to the surprise of no one, the cycle repeats. You leave.
Aventurine had made a few petty offhand remarks about being “abandoned,” yes, but Topaz never thought you would just… up and leave. After working with them every single day.
She doesn’t worry too much, though. All she needs to do is be more useful to you, surely!
…Probably!
Then, among your oldest residents… there’s Dan Heng.
He was confused, lost, and suspicious at first glance. This newcomer they happened to find at the Space Station had some Aeon-like being with them? And—what’s that voice????
He probably would have kept it to himself until he figured things out… if March hadn’t immediately freaked out about the exact same problem.
Then he, March, and Stelle had their bery first bonding moment: trying to figure out who the hell is speaking, and what exactly is happening.
After that, things fall into place… sort of. You aren’t too big on him, and that’s fine. He doesn’t mind it much. He does mind how you bring General Jing Yuan of all people to the Express, who keeps giving him glances akin to a sad cat begging for food, but that’s neither here nor there.
(No, seriously — they meet all these people and you bring one of Dan Feng’s friends? Who’s next, Blade?)
Then you acquire his Vidyadhara form.
And make him fight in that form.
And make him walk around in that form.
He has one preferred look, and it’s the one without his horns. Once again, he feels less like who he’s chosen to be, and more like someone he doesn’t remember being at all.
He knows you’re not doing it out of malice—you probably just like the shiny water attacks, much like Stelle and March do.
Dan Heng eventually comes to accept that form as part of him rather than something to repress, (“They… could’ve probably helped you with that before getting that form…” Stelle sighed, mild irritation in her voice — something she doesn’t direct at you very often. Dan Heng doesn’t get it, nor does he bother learning from Stelle of all people, but apparently it has to do with you being “behind on quests.”) which is also part of why he doesn’t hold anything against you, even now. He doesn’t worship the ground you walk on, nor does he dislike you. And that’s something you come to appreciate a lot once you two begin sharing a life on the Express, among… everyone else.
All these... Other people....
......
...Oh, boy, you have a lot of people to make amends with, huh.
Oh my good god I love your sahsrau. It’s definitely different from the other saau I’ve encountered here! I love Sunday and Phainon equally, and I hope we have more time bonding with Sunday (or with Phainon equally (sorry, I think we come as pairs as this point, the yearning is BADBAD)) like just ease his heart and hug him steady so he knows we still love him.
You are a 100% right tbh Phainon DEFINITELY comes as a pair with you lmao. Do not seperate!! He will cry.
Though, as time goes on, I'm sure you'd get to bond with Sunday...! Somehow!
Poor guy has been through a lot, both because of you and also other factors cough cough, so it would be much, much appreciated if you could, yk... Shrug Phainon off long enough to give him a hug.
Phainon's not exactly possessive or anything, if just a bit too clingy; but he doesn't exactly love it when your attention is elsewhere. Hasn't it been elsewhere enough? Stupid dragons and blondes and all? Yeah. Yeah it has. Look at him. Now. Please?
Of course you want to make amends with Sunday, especially with how much you've clearly hurt him unknowingly; the real issue is how Phainon has developed a disdain against him, because of Sunday's bitterness towards you. And if Phainon doesn't like him, you can't exactly hang out with him, because anytime you try to approach Sunday, you just... Conveniently, can't!
"Oh no," Phainon just happens to call for you, "can't believe my Partner just fell off that cliff. Guess we'll have to go get her haha. Ha. Right. We're busy. We."
(You're unsure if Stelle is actually in on it or if she's an actual victim in these distractions, but you won't be too surprised either way.)
Despite his control freak issues, Sunday's always been sort of timid, so it's not that you're surprised by the way he hasn't tried to reach out himself, even if you told him you wanted to be there for him... But it is a bit disappointing.
In his defense, of course—there's a whole wall between you two. A wall you quite enjoy the company of, clearly. One who hogs all your time.
Maybe he shouldn't even bother. You're there for him... Spiritually?? That's. That's something, right? Better than what he had thought you wanted from him before, at least! (Low bar, but he's trying.)
You, however. Remain determined! Phainon's attached to your hip? That's fine, you love the guy, he's been your pillar alongside Stelle ever since you ended up here, whatever the isekai process may be a punishment for! Away from everything you know, all logic you know in general, you desperately needed some supportive friends to help ground you—and that's exactly what they've been. Good friends.
(For reasons unknown to you, Stelle snorts in amusement at the last declaration, with a quick glance to Phainon. Can't even make friends in the Express, apperantly.)
You will, however, make friends with Sunday dammit. You didn't come here to be hated! You have some sort of history with all these people, those who dislike you and love you alike!
Now, the first, real question becomes... How do you make sure Sunday befriends Phainon, so you can all hang out together???
can i just say i am loving ur self aware fic concept ESPECIALLY WITH HOW STELLE IS GETTING IMPORTANCE i love it tysm
SO GLAD TO HEAR YOU LIKING IT !!!
Stelle is very dear to me personally and also, like, if anyone can be more connected to the player than others, i feel it should be the main character tbh. Especially in Stelle's case—since, unlike Lumine for example, she doesn't remember her past at all. She just wakes up and boom, you're there. Before anyone else, you have Stelle, and before anyone else, she has you.
You leaving and coming back, or any other habits are just things she's gotten used to; sure, it was definitely a bit scary when you first left for a long period of time, but even then, you're mostly spending time with... Her neighbors. So you're never too far away, she knows that.
Whereas in Phainon or Sunday or anyone else's case, they have a whole life they experience and all of a sudden this... Gaze falls upon them one day. Almost like what it feels to be watched by an Aeon, but even more unfamiliar! Oh, what's this? They also start hearing voices? Okay. So they've lost it, clearly!
And then the Trailblazer holds their shoulders and merrily explains that hey!! The entire universe is a scam, they exist to entertain (and have fun!! she adds, not ironic whatsoever), and the only one who truly has any say in who gets to travel across the available cosmos and live freely, and who gets to stress out due to plot reasons until they die is, well you.
okay. what
Phainon probably really struggled with that, like, imagine fighting against an Aeon because they keep you a prisoner for their own gain and watch as your friends die over and over again. Then, it turns out even that Aeon is a prisoner in similar circumstances!
First, it's resentment, hatred even, because what else is there to feel? What else does he have against the untouchable but the unending flames of his anguish and pain? From birth to death, again and again, he's been a puppet in the hands of some destructive control freak, and now he learns even if he manages to break free, he will remain a puppet.
Of course he's mad about it!
Then, though, seeing as the hero within his heart, the woman he admires and envies so much, is so fond of you, depends so much on you, clearly adores you... It gets confusing.
Logically, he should hate you, right?
But he sees how someone he loves so dearly cares so much for you, and how you clearly care just as much for her. How you're the reason why she isn't afraid to face any challenge head on. Why she knows she'll be fine at the end of the day.
He wants that too. Something to hold on to, someone who can be his rock. Unlike Lygus and Nanook, who have proven to want nothing but pain from him, or all his loved ones, who have proven to slip through his fingers no matter what he does.
(Stelle explains in detail how you aren't really an Aeon, how you don't actively affect the road her life takes, but... Really, however it must be, you're clearly helping her.)
