Local Boston Lizard makes garlic bread, gets disabled and owns a russian battle rifle now
STORY TIME
>I join as a local lizard chef, Ozzie Betts.
>Local bridge catboy troll making people pay a toll
>Ignore the fiend, the absolute scoundrel
>Scared as all fuck (last time I tried to cook I sucked)
>I got the drip
>Headed to kitchen
>JESSE BOTANISTS WE NEED TO COOK METH FOOD
>I see a dead spider
>Neuron Activation
>I make spidermeat bread
>It tastes like shit
.>MISSION COMPLETE
>Make a food channel so people know when I finish cooking
>Lady comes in and tastes the ""food""
>"REmEmberWeHAVeHuMANShEReTOo"
>BITCH I DON'T FUGGIN CARE
>make random assorted food
>get asked by somebody to make mozzarella
>I pay to get stuff for tacos (TACOS!!)
>it never came
>I only made plain tacos
>I fuck around, make a cake, chef shit
>I find out how to make meat from meatwheat
>THANKS FOR BOTANY BEING MORE USEFUL THAN SPACE AMAZON' (cargo)
>"Hey, Ozzie. Want some garlic for garlic bread"
>"FUGGIN HELL YEAHHHH"
>I make the shit required for garlic bread
>GARLIC BREAD AQUIRED
>"HEY CAP, HEY CHAPLAIN, WANT SOME FUGGIN GARLIC BREAD?!"
>THEY BOTH AGREE
>THIS IS THE BEST CHEF ROUND EVER
>space dragon
>me and the bois invading church to fight it
>we die, I lose my limbs and my clothes
>I get revived while listening to the ending theme of Disco Elysium (its a good theme fight me)
>We leave on the shuttle
>"GOD, I FUGGIN LOVE BEIN' FROM BOSTON!"
>we all die because some asshole let plasma out on the shuttle