It wasn't easy for Baelfire to make his way through the woods, especially with a limp, leaning on a stick found in the woods. His leg throbbed and it was like his flesh was burning underneath his boot, but he gritted his teeth and did his best to ignore it. The pale morning light shone, but even the sun was of little comfort. The previous night stuck to the atmosphere, heavy and suffocating, and Baelfire could swear that the wind carried the scent of blood itself. It threatened to make him nauseous.
He didn't know where Fox was. He had no way of knowing. So he did what he knew Fox would want him to do - go in search of their younger friends. Baelfire wondered if they were still in the cave, where he had told them to remaind until morning - what if people had found them in the darkness ? What if Bae had unknowingly lured them into a closed trap, into a cavernous hollow where they had to crawl against the wall, desperatly trying to escape threats ? The thought made Bae's stomach churn. He would never, ever forgive himself if that was the case.
Gripping fear shook his ribs as images invaded his mind. What if he stepped into the small cave only to find small, frail bodies piled on top of each other ? No. No, no, no - it couldn't be. He refused to think of it until he knew for sure.
The Neverland jungle often seemed like a labyrinth. Today was no exception : it wasn't easy for the boy to find the exact spot he had left his friends in the previous day. All the way there, he kept hoping he'd miraculously stumble unto Fox, but he didn't.
Instead, he discovered a body, arrows stuck in his back, face down in the ground - the sight of sandy blond hair made him waver, and he knelt down next to the unmoving form, his hands shaking.
He grabbed the boy by the coat and made him turn. It wasn't Fox. It was just a boy Baelfire didn't know. His eyes were wide open and glassy, and the veins of his neck were black - dream shade. Roots and vines sprung from the ground, crawling over the boy's legs, like he was half-buried there - Baelfire swallowed hard and pulled away, revolted and pained by the sight.
It was like the body was slowly sinking into the ground. It was disturbing. Horrifying.
But Bae couldn't stay here - he had to continue. He didn't have time to find the cave - instead, by a stroke of luck, on the path leading up to it, he found a small band of children huddled together. He recognized them immediatly, and one of them cried out his name. Immediatly, Baelfire let out a sigh of relief, and he bent down as the boys trotted towards him. He leaned forward to make sure they weren't hurt - one of them had a scratch on his palm, because he had tried to get out of the cave too soon, only to run back in. Baelfire scolded him gently, but hugged the boy to reassure him.
He asked them if they had seen Fox. They said no. The boy's heart clenched.
"Where do you think he is, Baelfire ? Do you think he's dead ?"
The words were spoken in an odd mixture of curiosity and fascination - some children were almost captivated by the morbidity of death, without realizing its full weight. Bae had never been like this. He'd always been aware of what death meant.
It meant the person was gone forever, never to be seen again. Death was a void. An eternal hollow.
"No", the boy answered in a voice he hoped sounded assured. "He's all right. We'll see him soon".
He wasn't certain of it at all, but he didn't want to frighten the children. The relieved expression of some faces validated his white lie.
Some of them asked him how he had gotten injured - he skipped the major details, and told them it was just a scratch, even if he wanted nothing more but to sit, or lie down so his flesh would stop burning.
The forest paled under the bleak rays of morning as Baelfire lead the boys back towards the compound. As the little group walked, the smallest one of the bunch, Thomas, walked right next to Bae, his step shaky and hesitant. When they reached the outskirts of the camp, the boy paused a bit, his eyes widening slightly. His hand immediatly tugged on the hem of Baelfire's coat to gain his attention.
"Hey", Bae said softly, noticing the child's nervousness. "What's wrong ?"
"We didn't kill anything", the child whispered as he stared at the road leading towards the camp in fear. "We just hid all night. They'll make fun of us again. They'll say we're not worthy."
He paused and looked up at Bae again, his eyes wide as coins :
"... What if Pan gets mad at us ?"
At this, what had been slithering beneath his concern and exhaustion and determination to remain calm for the sake of the boys came bursting through his chest - a blast of anger, rebellion, something that burned his heart like coal. Baelfire knelt down for a second, still leaning on his stick, and he laid a hand on Thomas' shoulders firmly.
"Don't you worry about Pan", he said, hiding the depths of his resentment with difficulty. "All right ? I'll deal with him if I need to".
Thomas gave Baelfire a frail smile, but he nodded - with his free hand, Bae grabbed the boy's and lead him back to the camp, the other boys on their heels. Baelfire's heart slammed in his chest as voices echoed through the air the more they approached - most of the other boys were probably back by now, but the idea of facing them was almost sickening.
Baelfire had seen their arrows buried in children's backs. He had fallen, himself, into one of their traps.
Would they mock him for getting injured ? Would they ask him where the bandage was from ? But it wasn't what Baelfire cared about. He knew he'd hear them laugh and boast and brag over their kills, and the idea made him want to run away from there faster than they could blink.
And Pan might be there.
But even that idea wasn't enough to make Bae turn back - because Fox might be there too and if he wasn't, Bae could leave the boys here safely and go look for him himself. He wouldn't stop until he's found his friend.
So he marched towards the compound, his hand gripping the stick, and he watched as the flock of boys spread around him, all of them jogging towards the clearing. Only Thomas remained safely beside him, almost hiding in his shadow.