#lovesicknes

[lil-ones-chaotic-drama-life-club]

And then after years of silence, I was finally able to see you again.

The news had it that some falling stars will be visible tonight and this old bench outside your house seemed to be the best place to witness such grand occurrence in the sky.

"You're here." I said as we sat down.

"Yeah, just a quick visit. The past months had been so cruel to me and I thought I needed to come home to feel better." You replied.

"Well, the town missed you." I said.

You looked at me and smiled. And that was enough for me to realize what I've truly missed for years when you were not here.

"Anyway, are your wishes set for tonight?" I asked before I'll lose myself in your eyes.

"Uhmmm, maybe. I don't know. Those falling stars show up in no certain time and when they do, you just wish of whatever that comes up in your mind at that moment. "

"How about you?" You asked as you look up, as if you were searching for something above.

I paused for awhile and while we're both gazing at the sky, I answered...

"Most of my wishes were already granted but there's this one I still ask from the stars. The same exact wish for the past few years. You know some wishes never really change. And some hopes are never meant to die."

"That's tough. But what if it was never really meant for you?" You asked as you redirected your attention to me.

I tried to make faces as I didn't want you to notice how hard that question had hit me. It's like getting that sudden shock right in your nerves. And then I stared blankly at the sky and remembered how everything is still the same for me even when you changed completely. I was reminded how I still hold my hopes high even after all the try. I was reminded of that wish I keep on asking from the universe --- you. It has always been you. I still wish for you on every falling star I see. But maybe some falling stars were not meant for us to wish upon. Maybe some of them carried that wish as they crash down. And those hopes that go along with them are nothing more of debris now that had been scattered as they exploded on the ground.

Or maybe you were right all along. That some wishes were never granted because they weren't really meant for us.

For a moment, there was a screaming silence between us and before I could finally speak again, some astonishing bright objects appeared from the heavens.

"They're here." You whispered.

My eyes favored the scene from above for awhile but my peripheral vision saw that your eyes were now closed as if you were praying deeply. I don't know why, but that made me want to just stare at you instead. And then in my head I said...

"Maybe you were right. That no matter how I keep wishing for the things my heart wants, if they are never meant for me, the stars can't grant me those. And if this is the best we could ever get, then I don't care what I'd miss tonight. I only care about what I'll miss tomorrow and for the next years to come. I don't mind missing the chance to witness those objects at the sky if it means staring at you like this. I don't mind missing the chance to wish upon the falling stars tonight. Because as much as I believe my wish can't be granted anymore, I know that it was at least heard. And tonight was the answer. So I'll just stare at you until you'll open your eyes. I'll stare at you until you've finally said all your wishes to the skies. And then finally after that, I'll look up again and say my final wish to that last falling star I could still see:

to make your wishes come true, even if they'll never include me."

— jeffturtosa

[the-yangirl-blog]

From the manga Abnormal Kei Joshi. Basically a yandere harem.

[lil-ones-chaotic-drama-life-club]

Loving [her] is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street Faster than the wind Passionate as sin, ended so suddenly Loving [her] is like trying to change your mind Once you’re already flying through the free fall Like the colors in autumn So bright just before they lose it all Losing [her] was blue like I’ve never known Missing [her] was dark grey all alone Forgetting [her] was like trying to know somebody you've never met But loving [her] was red Loving [her] was red Touching [her] is like realizing all you ever wanted was right there in front of you Memorizing [her] was as easy as knowing all the words to your old favorite song Fighting with [her] was like trying to solve a crossword and realizing there’s no right answer Regretting [her] was like wishing you never found out that love could be that strong Losing [her] was blue like I’d never known Missing [her] was dark grey all alone Forgetting [her] was like trying to know somebody you've never met But loving [her] was red Oh red burning red Remembering [her] comes in flashbacks and echoes Tell myself it’s time now, gotta let go But moving on from [her] is impossible When I still see it all in my head Burning red! Loving him was red! Oh, losing [her] was blue like I’d never known Missing [her] was dark grey all alone Forgetting [her] was like trying to know somebody you've never met Cause loving [her] was red yeah yeah red We're burning red And that's why [s]he's spinning round in my head Comes back to me burning red Yeah yeah Cause love was like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street

[zehnvordrei]

Ich lache wenn ich dich seh’ und du mich ansprichst. Ich kann einfach nicht anders. Aber glaub mir, es ist verdammt schwer noch zu lachen, denn ich weiß das du mich niemals so lieben wirst wie ich dich Liebe.