Uncertainty accompanied by absurdity. Like, why!?
He left me, through a fucking text message. What can I say though? He’s far too ignorant and self-centered to understand how upset I am. How can he break up with me? How is he the one leaving me? How did I grow to be this dependent on him, especially when he can’t even mail a letter correctly? I can’t lie though; I still miss him. Ugh! He’s not even the fucking point!
I had a really good friend mention her interest in the app “Tinder.” At the time, I was still in a relationship with that inconsiderate mother fucker so I didn’t really pay too much attention to the details of “Tinder.” Once we split, I downloaded that shit with nothing but bitterness fueling me. All I wanted to do was find a ridiculously attractive male to distract me, even if it was for the evening. Ha! Reading that sentence back, I’m basically in the escort business but unintentionally.
Anyways! A million swipes to the left and a few handful swipes to the right later, someone matched with me! I genuinely thought it was some kind of game. I mean, do people really meet people on here? Is this legal? Why do I still feel bad for doing this? Like he’s coming back or some bullshit. Ugh whatever.
I’m mainly doing this for me, but also to give the public an insight to what it’s really like risking your safety and your emotions for an individual found on an online profiling game of directional swipes. Some of you may have had good experiences on “Tinder.” Hell, I’m still deciding on whether everything’s actually good or whether it just felt good at the moment. Either way, my original heart tugger almost ceases to haunt me.
I unfortunately remain haunted though. And how is it that I got so lucky that every experience almost gets better? Or, well, not necessarily better. I don’t even know what I’m trying to say.
This thirst is quite insatiable. I’ve taken it to a whole different level. I’m poor with handling my emotions so i don’t know whether to laugh or cry half the time. Or perhaps do both. Let the secrets out! So I can finally go to sleep.
