@madefate asked: ❛ i’m supposed to be the one who protects you from monsters. i’m not supposed to be one. ❜ / from blitz bc of course
quotes that broke me starters !!
to be COMPLETELY fair, both of them were exhausted in every sense of the word.
there had been two matinees and FOUR regular evening performances over the holiday weekend, which in itself would have been exhausting for even the most seasoned of ADULT performers. ( seasoned, absolutely, but adult ?? only cash buckzo would consider a pair of fourteen-year-olds grown enough to handle such a workload. ) add in the setup beforehand, the massive undertaking of CLEANING UP after each crowd cleared, the tertiary responsibilities of their daily lives ( bathing, eating, RESTING -- when did they have time for ANY of it, really ?? ) combined with the physical and mental exertion of SO much time in the ring -- it was an absolute recipe for disaster.
adding a dress rehearsal with NEW CHOREOGRAPHY on a monday morning after all of that was just cruel.
and normally barbie wasn't given to tears ( not for many years, anyhow ) but her pointe shoes had long since passed the point of blistering -- evolved to pinching and rubbing her RAW, the costume ( specifically tailored to accentuate curves that had just BARELY begun to emerge ) sequins digging under her arms, the constant sensation that the bodice was about to slip. ( " PLEASE dad, please, don't make me wear this. " ) the ACHE in her jaw still lingering from when they'd had their braces tightened just days beforehand. ( STILL getting used to the unkind companionship of a mouthful of metal. )
objectively, WAY back in the part of barbie's brain that wasn't biting back the frustrated tears obscuring her vision and making the sweltering stage lights streak and smear like falling stars, she KNEW blitzo didn't mean to be so harsh. her twin was just as frustrated and exhausted as she was, and both of them were choked with the anxiety only their father could conjure so effortlessly within them. ( " i don't give a SHIT how long it takes you both, it BETTER look good by tomorrow. NOBODY wants to come see the same shit twice. " )
then barbie missed the mark. AGAIN.
and when the teenage imp sprung to her feet, jaw dropped to really lay into blitzo for riding her ass -- instead of a biting retort or even a simple ' FUCK OFF ' rolling easily off the tongue, a choked sob was all that emerged. ( IT'S ALL TOO MUCH. ) thoroughly humiliated to be weeping in the middle of the ring in front of the entirety of the carnies ( thankfully that too was just an ILLUSION of the teenage mind; in reality, few of the crew had spared the pair so much as a passing glance ) barbie had shoulder checked the FUCK out of her brother and sought out the only solace to be had in their small world. ( hiding in her bed, head under the blanket, pretending she didn't EXIST. )
" it's fine. " the reply is followed by a wet snuffle as she lets the blanket fall away, decorating her wrist and cheek with a large smear of black eyeliner as barbie scrubs at her tired eyes. " you -- i know y-you didn't mean to. "