#magicaldice

[magicaldice]

This is genuinely one of my favorite tiktok’s of Matt’s. There’s something about it that fucks me up in the best way possible everytime I watch it.

[magicaldice]

(Ongoing) masterlist & summary.

After Hours is 10 part series featuring Matthew Sturniolo & Violet Monroe.

content warnings: drug & alcohol use. angst. sexual content.

Matthew Sturniolo: At just 17 years old he moved to California from Boston after being scouted by a high ranking model recruiter. Now at 22 years old he’s one of the highest paid models in the industry. His reputation goes beyond his looks, he’s a well respected man, a hard worker & down to earth.

There’s rumors of him being a “ladies man” despite relationships never being his kind of thing. Casual sex & no strings attached always seemed safer. He even refuses to kiss just any woman because it feels too intimate. But behind closed doors he questioned whether love is just a legend, almost wondering if it was a myth of some sort. Always observing it but never experiencing it.

Violet Monroe: Despite being a nepo baby she wasn’t handed a shortcut to success. Her career has recently skyrocketed after she’d been in 2 movies and a brand new show. But what most people didn’t know is she did more acting off camera than on the screens. On the outside she has a magnetic personality, chaotic party girl energy. She was born and raised in California, known by everyone, but truly seen by nobody.

At 21 years old she hates casual sex & constantly ignores the signs of being touch deprived. Beneath the cameras and flashing lights there’s a lonely girl who craves a love she isn’t sure exist.

In this series: Violet’s party girl, chaotic energy & Matthew’s calm, composed, demeanor balance each-other out. They find one another while navigating their lives of fame, success & unique lifestyles. An unexpected friendship is the outcome, potentially blossoming into something more. But with that being said, with many similarities, come many differences. Different habits, different struggles, and ways of thinking. 2 natural undercover yearners with undeniable gravity and chemistry, put their fear & love into an equation. Their needs & desires equaling a reality that requires faith & trust.

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5

part 6 part 7 part 8 part 9 part 10

comment to be added to this series taglist!!

[magicaldice]

Synopsis for Divine Lover: Chris and Y/n happened to meet under unfortunate circumstances. But the question is do you blame coincidence or fate?

⚠︎ : read at your own leisure. this series will include sensitive topics. mental health issues. violence. substance abuse. smut.

part 7

previous part. series masterlist.

I had spent the entire night of Christmas spiraling. Trying to come up with any and every way possible to make it to where Chris didn’t have to go back home.

3 months have passed since Christmas. And Chris had given up on living with his dad. He had found an apartment a week after Christmas and moved into it a couple days after. 

I had helped him move all of his stuff out of his dads when his dad had gone on a work trip for 3 days. After practically 3 months of living in his own apartment it had all started to come together. 

Chris and I were doing really good. I struggled sometimes with the thought of running and hiding still. It was less of wanting to hide over time but the thoughts still lingered in the back of my mind.

I was so afraid he didn’t feel the same way. I wasn’t just afraid of telling him how I felt. I was afraid of love in general. Love has never been logical. Love was a foreign concept to me. Love was something I feared. 

Even after all these months of Chris and I spending time together I still wasn’t sure. I wasn’t sure that he felt the same way I did. I wasn’t sure what this was to him. I didn’t know if he had other girls that he would treat the same way. 

Chris and I failed to communicate our feelings to one another. Because the thought of the love being something mutual scared us both. But the thought of losing each other because the other possibly didn’t feel the same way was even scarier. 

He never mentioned other girls. But that didn’t mean they didn’t exist. That didn’t mean that we were exclusive. Maybe it just meant he didn’t kiss and tell. But I got more curious as time passed.

Chris and I sat in my bed. We had just got done doing face masks as we snuggled up together. His hands were wrapped around my waist spooning me. “I’m so glad I met you” he said out of the blue.

It made my heart flutter. “I’m glad we met too” I said. I turned around to face him. He stared at me with something heavy lingering behind his eyes. “You're so beautiful” he said. I smiled at the compliment. “Your beautiful” I responded back.

“Yeah? You got a crush on me or something?” he joked. I rolled my eyes and grabbed the pillow from beneath my head to hit him in the face with it. He laughed, he loved seeing me get all nervous.

“What’s wrong? Cat got your tongue?” he asked playfully before hitting me back with the pillow. “I don’t have a crush on you Chris. I just enjoy looking at your face” I said. “Yeah?” he said. “Mhm” I hummed. 

He stared at me for a moment. And the way he stared at me, like his eyes could see into my soul made my stomach turn. “Come closer” he said. I scooched closer to him. Our faces inches apart.

His eyes flickered from my eyes to lips. His hand found my waist, pulling me even closer into him. “It’s getting really hard to not kiss you ma” he whispered. “So do it” I said. He looked into my eyes like he was stunned for a moment. 

But seconds later his lips were on mine. Our bodies moved against one another, our lips synced up at the perfect pace. My body immediately reacted to his lips on mine. A pool of wetness grew between my legs almost instantly. 

His tongue swirled against mine, our saliva mixing and everything around us disappearing as we were consumed by each other. His hand gripped onto my ass, and my hand found its way to his hard member.

I palmed him through his pants, getting more needy by the second. He moaned into my mouth, loving the way I touched him. But then he pulled back. “What’s wrong?” I asked. “Can’t. Can’t do this with you” he said. 

My cheeks tinted a pink from embarrassment as I pulled away from him. “No come here mama, it’s not like that” he said pulling me back into him. “I can’t give you what you need. Not fully. I just can’t have sex with you” he said.

I stared at him, waiting for an explanation. “Its not because I don't want to, it's because I’m obsessed with you. It wouldn’t be sex ma, I’ve only had sex with girls I don't care about. I don’t want to have sex with you, I want to make love to and with you. And that scares me” he admits. My heart dropped. 

“You want to make love to me?” I asked. I hated that his words only made me wetter. “Mhm. I do. Really bad” he said, pulling me back onto his lap. 

Chris’s POV:

She was straddled on top of me, her eyes filled with desire and trust. I looked at her, taking in how good she looked straddled on top of me.

My hand went to the back of her neck, pulling it a little just so that her neck was angled enough to where my lips could land and mark her.

My kisses were slow and open mouthed. I could feel her body shudder against me as I sucked on her neck, the delicate skin turning purple and blue.

Her body was reacting, she grinded against me. The fabric of her shorts were thin, making it possible for her to feel my hard member underneath her.

My lips moved from her neck to her mouth. Her hands tangled into my hair, and every moment of her lips and body on mine made me feel like I was floating, high with a mix of bliss.

I was basking in this feeling. Studying the way her face faltered into neediness. Like she was enjoying every moment of this just as much as I was.

I needed to keep my composure. I grabbed onto her, forcing her to straddle my thigh. I couldn't touch her, not in the way that I wanted to. But she could ride my thigh until she came undone. It was the most I could let happen. "Use me" I said.

Her body grinded against me and I watched as she chased her high. She held onto me, her breath unsteady. "That's it, pretty girl. Doing so good" I said, watching her struggle to keep herself in tact.

Her little whimpers made my self control start to thin. I wanted to claim her, take her soul and never live another day without her. Her hands grabbed onto me tighter.

"Chris" she moaned as my hands explored her body. Her grinding became sloppy, and her whimpers became louder. My eyes rolled to the back of my head and my jaw tightened.

She was so beautiful I could have an orgasm just by the way she says my name. I could feel her wetness on my thigh, my dick was hard as concrete, leaking with pre cum.

And then her nails dug into my back, and I could tell she was falling apart in my arms. "Mhm so good baby" I said as she let her body go limp against mine.

"So good" I whispered into her ear as she was trying to catch her breath. It took everything in me to not tear her clothes off and plow into her until she saw stars.

I held onto her for awhile, letting her come back down to earth. She was the most precious thing I had ever come across. And I was never letting her go.

-

Y/n’s POV:

Chris and I got to his apartment after going out to eat. We were laying on his bed when his phone started to ring. The phone was right next to us so I had a clear sight of the caller ID.

It was a girl's name. Kayla. He denied the call quickly and then set his phone on his nightstand. I didn’t say anything at first. Why would I? We technically weren’t together. But then his phone rang once more.

“Answer” I said blankly. He looked at me and hesitated. “I’ll call her later” he responded. “You mean like when I'm not here so she can come over?” I asked. His eyebrows furrowed before he chuckled.

“What are you trying to imply?” he asked. I shrugged my shoulders and looked away from him. “Just saying you don’t have to pretend like you're not messing around with other girls” I said. He stared at me like he was truly mind boggled.

“Do you think I would be spending all this time with you if I was messing with other girls?” he asked. I looked at him, really looked at him.  “You act like it’s not possible” I said. He looked at me like he couldn’t believe the words coming out of my mouth. 

“You think I would let you have your own section of clothes in my closet if I had other girls around?” he asked. I shrugged my shoulders. “You don’t have to lie to me Chris. It’s not like we’re together” I said. 

His face twisted for a moment. Like he was just stabbed over and over. Full of hurt and confusion. And then it was replaced with something much more cold. Like he just shut off his emotions entirely and went numb. 

“If you're jealous just say that” he said. “No offense but you're nobody to get jealous over. Probably every girl in town can say they have had access to you” I said without thinking about the weight of my words. Irritation sank underneath my skin. 

“I don’t understand what your problem is, I’m not fuckin around with any other girls” he said. “Right. That’s why you wanted to wait to call that girl back. So you could tell her to come over later and whisper sweet nothings into her ear” I said. 

“Go through my phone y/n” he said, tossing his phone over to me. “No. I’m good. They can have you Chris” I said before standing up. “Come here ma” he said, his voice unsteady. As if watching me get upset was tearing him apart. “No. Have fun with kayla” I said bitterly before walking out of his bedroom.

He followed me to the living room. “Stop” he said before grabbing my arm and forcing me to face him. “You know this was all a mistake. I should have never poured my time and energy into you” I said harshly. 

“Please go through my phone. I swear to god y/n I haven't even looked at another girl since I've met you” he said, his voice shaky like he was on the verge of crying. “Then who’s Kayla?” I asked. 

He hesitated again. “Nobody important. Please you just have to trust me on this” he responded. “I gave you the chance to tell the truth. Delete my number” I said before walking out of the front door.

By the time I got into my car my eyes were already blurry with tears.

Chris was the first man I let myself get close to. The first person I had done anything semi sexual with since I lost my virginity.

It wasn't about anything sexual though. It was the fact that I felt used. Like he was stringing me along for the fun of it. Like he saw that I trusted him and took advantage of it.

" it's because I’m obsessed with you. It wouldn’t be sex ma, I’ve only had sex with girls I don't care about. I don’t want to have sex with you, I want to make love to and with you. And that scares me"

His words replayed in my head.

If he actually meant what he said he wouldn't be involved with other women.

I trusted him. I cared about him. But all of these months I spent with him. All of the time and energy I poured into him. Was it for nothing? Was this apart of some fucked up plan he had?

I was on the verge of breaking down as I pulled out of the parking lot. My heart was racing and my head was clouded with so many emotions.

I couldn't stand feeling this. I needed to escape.

And I knew the perfect solution. Alcohol.

taglist: @velvetspideruniverse @courta13

[magicaldice]

Synopsis for Divine Lover: Chris and Y/n happened to meet under unfortunate circumstances. But the question is do you blame coincidence or fate?

⚠︎ : read at your own leisure. this series will include sensitive topics. mental health issues. violence. substance abuse. smut.

Part 1

part 2. series masterlist.

Graduation was 3 months ago. My life since then has been boring. Not that it wasn’t boring before considering I didn’t really have an eventful high school experience. The most excitement I get nowadays comes from my waitress job. Where I just so happened to meet my one and only best friend Mia. 

My days currently consist of work, doomscrolling and sleep. Technically I’ve lived on my own since I turned 18. Moving out on graduation day, not even thinking twice about it. But even when I lived with my mother I was on my own back then too. 

My mother hasn’t reached out to me since I moved out. Probably too busy trying to find her new drug fixation. Last time I saw her she was screaming at me. Asking how she was going to be able to pay for rent if I wasn't there. Because as soon as I turned 16 and got a job I was the one who paid the bills. Just so she could use whatever little money she had on drugs and impulsive decisions. 

Independence was something I learned early on. Not necessarily by choice, but it was a necessity if I wanted to stay alive. So if anything, living alone was a type of freedom I enjoyed and yearned for since a young age. 

As I sit in my apartment and scroll through social media I realized I hadn’t done anything productive today. It made me feel icky. So I decided to get up, put some clothes on and go for a walk. 

As I walked around the neighborhood the sun was setting. It was peaceful. I thought about texting Mia and asking her to hangout. But I realized she worked today and was probably exhausted. 

As I continued to walk down the block I thought about my mother. What she could possibly be doing these days. If she’s even alive. If she’ll ever realize how fucked up her actions and choices are. And just as my thoughts were about to spiral I'm pulled back into reality when I hear shouting coming from a little bit down the street.

“You can’t just fucking leave!” I hear a man’s voice yell. And then I see a boy, who looks my age storm out of a house and walk in my direction. “Get back here!” I hear as an older man steps out of the front door and onto the porch. “Fuck you!” the boy who’s my age yells back towards the older man before continuing to walk in my direction.

“Don’t fucking come back you piece of shit!” the older man yells. My movement comes to a stop. Frozen and curious. Also kind of scared. The boy my age notices me finally. And as he gets closer I now see that his eye is black and his nose is bleeding. 

I stood in place on the sidewalk. Not knowing what to do. “Fuck you looking at?” the boy asks as his steps bring him closer to me. “Are you okay?” I asked. He stops once he gets in front of me, about 3 feet apart. 

“I’m fine. Mind your business” he snaps, looking at me with annoyance on his face. “I’m sorry. You just don't look too good right now” I responded awkwardly. The boy’s breathing is heavy and unsteady. 

“Do you have a car by chance?” he asks. “Um- I mean I live around the corner. Do you need a ride or something?” I ask. “Yeah could you take me across town. My car is in the shop and I need to get the fuck away from here” he says. 

“Um- okay just follow me back to my place” I said. He follows behind me as we walk back to my place. My nerves are unsettled. I wanted to ask what happened. I wanted to know why he had a black eye and bloody nose. But I figured now wasn’t the time or place to ask. 

I also wondered why I agreed to give a ride to a stranger. I could have just continued to walk and act invisible. But I didn’t, and now we stood in front of my place looking at each other. “You have to let me clean the cut on your eye” I said. 

“What? I didn’t ask for you to try and become a doctor. I asked for a ride” he said. “I know. But the cut can easily get infected” I responded. He stared at me with confusion on his face. “You don’t even know me. I could rob you right now and your offering to clean a cut on my face” he responds. 

I stared back at him. He had a point. He really did. But I was stubborn. 

“Fine” he said, finally giving in. 

I walked him into my apartment. He followed me to my bathroom and watched as I pulled out a first aid kit. I grabbed a cotton ball and then I pulled out hydrogen peroxide.

“Okay stand still” I said. He stood in front of me as I gently pressed the cotton ball with hydrogen peroxide onto the cut by his eye. I tried my best to be cautious. He stared down at me and our eyes locked as I held the cotton ball to his skin.

“What’s your name?” he asked. “Y/n” I said. “What’s yours?” I questioned. “Chris” he said. 

After cleaning the cut and putting a tiny bandaid on him he washed the dried up blood from his nose with warm water. “Okay now that your done playing doctor can you take me to my friends house?” he asked. I nodded my head. 

The car ride was silent. The only noise heard was when he was giving directions. “Turn left, okay now after the stoplight turn right”. 

Once we were parked in front of im assuming his friends house he thanked me for the ride. “You didn’t have to play hero tonight. I appreciate you though” he said. “Yeah. Hope everything's okay” I said quietly. 

He stared into my eyes like he was searching for something. Silence fell over us for a couple seconds. “Could you possibly do me a favor and not tell anyone what you saw” he said. His voice sounding a little nervous. “Yeah. Didn’t see anything” I respond.

“Alright cool. Thanks. It was nice to meet you y/n” he said, a tired smile appearing on his lips. I nod my head and then he gets out of the car. “Be safe” I yell out. He turns around and winks. 

The entire drive home felt unreal.

[magicaldice]

obsessed.

[magicaldice]

Synopsis for Divine Lover: Chris and Y/n happened to meet under unfortunate circumstances. But the question is do you blame coincidence or fate?

⚠︎ : read at your own leisure. this series will include sensitive topics. mental health issues. violence. substance abuse. smut.

part 4

previous part. series masterlist.

Mia and I talked to each other as we got ready to clock out of work. “Gonna go talk to boss real quick, I'll meet you outside” she said. I clocked out and was ready to go home and shower. But as I walked out of the restaurant my attention was immediately caught when I heard yelling in the parking lot.

My eyes landed on Chris and another guy our age. “What the fuck is wrong with you” the guy yelled at Chris. Chris swung on the guy, his punch connecting with the man’s face. 

Adrenaline washed over me. “Chris!” I yelled across the parking lot. But Chris was laser focused on the man in front of him. The man swung at Chris but missed, causing him to stumble forward. “Too slow” Chris chuckled before punching the guy in the face once again. 

“Chris!” I yelled. “Oh my god what the fuck is happening?” I heard Mia’s voice from behind me. Chris swung on the man, again and again. The man fell onto the ground wincing at the pain. 

“Chris!” I yelled once again. Mia followed behind me as I walked over towards him. “Dude. Stop he’s on the fucking ground!” Mia yelled as we got closer to Chris. He finally looked at Mia and I, a look of confusion appearing. 

“Dude your gonna get the fucking cops called” Mia said looking down at the man on the pavement. “Whatever” Chris said looking down at the man like he still wanted to pounce on him. 

Moments later we heard police sirens. Chris ran his hands through his hair. “Fuck” he said under his breath. “Come on y/n i’m not getting involved with whatever this lunatic has going on” Mia said. 

“What. No” I said to Mia. “What do you mean no?” She asked. Chris looked at me and then at Mia. “Come with us” I said to Chris. “What?” the two of them said at the same time. “Just drop him off with me at my place” I said to Mia.

“You know him?” she asked. “Yeah. I’ll explain later but we need to go now” I said, hearing the police sirens get closer. Once we were inside Mia’s car we headed to my apartment. The ride was quiet, letting me get lost in my thoughts.

I wondered what caused Chris to get violent with that man. I wondered if things had gotten any better at his house. If his dad had hit him again or not. I wondered what Chris thought about. What was going on inside his mind. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow” Mia said looking at me. We said our goodbyes and Chris followed me inside my apartment. We sat on the couch across from each other. 

“So what was that about?” I asked him. “Nothing important” he said. Always vague. Always guarded. “I’m not here to judge you Chris” I said. And I was telling him the truth. I truly had no room to judge. 

He shrugged his shoulders. “It’s nothing” he said once again. I stared at him as he avoided eye contact. I didn’t want to corner him into telling me what happened. So instead I asked if he wanted to do something.

“Like what?” he asked. “I don’t know. We can watch a movie or play a card game or literally anything” I said. He looked at me and smiled. “You're so cute” he said. But the tone of his voice made it seem like he was joking. Like he was being sarcastic. 

“Okay whatever then. We don’t have to do anything. Go out and get in some more trouble” I said. He held his hands up like he was surrendering. “I’m just playing around with you. We can watch a movie or show together” he said.

I walked to the kitchen and made some popcorn as Chris scrolled through Netflix. I grabbed the bowl of popcorn and some water bottles and headed back to the living room. This time I sat right next to him. 

“Want to watch stranger things?” he asked. I nodded my head and he pressed play. We watched the show in silence for a while. Eating popcorn and throwing in some commentary every now and then.

It was nearing midnight and Chris and I were still watching the show. The popcorn was finished and my eyes started to get a little heavy.

I looked at his hand, noticing the dried up blood on his knuckles. “You know, when I tell you to be safe I mean it” I said. He looked over at me, an unreadable expression on his face. And then he nodded his head. 

“You're so pure, ya know that?” he said. “Not pure. Just human” I responded. 

A moment of silence passed. “We’re so different” he said. “Why do you think that?” I asked. “Because you're kind. You smile even if there’s no reason to. And you didn’t let any ugly experiences you had turn you into an ugly human” he said. 

“But me- I just- I guess turned into someone that I said I was never gonna be like” he said. “Explain”. He let out a deep breath. “I’m just full of anger. And I let it consume me” he says before looking away. “I don’t want to be angry. I just am” he said.

My heart twisted at his words. This was the first time I heard vulnerability in Chris’s voice. Truly I felt empathy for him.

“But that makes you human. You're allowed to be angry. Or even happy. Or sad” I said. I grabbed onto his hand and rubbed over his knuckles gently. His eyes locked onto mine. “You're allowed to be human” I said. 

He nodded his head as we stared into each other’s eyes. I let go of his hand and returned my attention back to the t.v. And I didn’t realize it but Chris had continued to stare at me. Like he was stuck in a trance.

Eventually time passed and Chris had fallen asleep on the couch. It was the first time I seen him look content. I didn’t mind that he had fallen asleep. Or if he stayed the night. I just wanted him to be comfortable.

I grabbed a blanket from my room and placed it over him. I watched his chest rise and fall for a little bit before I fell asleep on the other side of the couch.

I didn’t know how long I had been asleep for. But I had awakened after hearing Chris’s phone ring. He was in such a deep sleep that he didn’t even move at the sound of his phone going off. 

I looked at the caller ID that said dad. 

His dad was calling him at 4 am. And I didn’t know if that was necessarily a good thing or not.  “Chris” I said from across the couch. But he didn’t respond. I stood up and walked over to him. He looked so peaceful that I almost let him continue to sleep.

“Chris” I said nudging his shoulder. He stirred around, still not fully awake. I repeated his name before shaking him a little. “Huh” he said opening his eyes slightly. “Your dad’s been calling you” I say.

He yawns, the tiredness showing in his eyes. “It’s okay. I’ll call him back later” he said. His voice raspy and raw. “You sure?” I asked. “Mhm” he hummed. I watched as Chris closed his eyes again. 

“Chris” I said. “Yeah?”. Hesitation came. He noticed. He propped himself up on his elbows. “What time is it?” he asked. “4 am” I said. He rubbed his eyes and sat up on the couch. “I’m so sorry I don’t even remember falling asleep” he said.

“It’s okay” I said. He sat there. Almost in a dissociated state. “I didn’t mean to overstay. I’m gonna head home” he said. “No- no you don't have to leave” I said. “I was gonna ask if you wanted to sleep in my room. The couch can get uncomfy after awhile” I said.

His eyes locked onto mine. “In your room?” he asked. I nodded my head. “Unless you want to leave” I said. He sat for a couple seconds without saying anything. Just staring off into space like he was deep in thought. 

But he was brought back to reality when his phone started ringing once again. He looked at the caller ID that said dad and then looked back up at me. “You sure I can stay?” he asked. I nodded my head. 

“Okay” he said. He left his phone out in the living room and followed me to my bedroom.

We laid down on the bed. I pulled the blanket over us and laid on my side facing him. He laid on his side to face me. For a moment we just stared at each other. The quiet that surrounded us was peaceful. “You okay?” he asked. “Mhm” I hummed. 

“I hope you sleep well” he said with a soft smile on his face. “You too” I responded.

I didn’t let myself fall asleep until I heard his light snores. 

[magicaldice]

Synopsis for Divine Lover: Chris and Y/n happened to meet under unfortunate circumstances. But the question is do you blame coincidence or fate?

⚠︎ : read at your own leisure. this series will include sensitive topics. mental health issues. violence. substance abuse. smut.

part 9

previous part. series masterlist.

I woke up to Chris stroking my hair, the sun coming through the blinds. “Good morning ” he whispered. “What time is it?” I asked. “It’s early. But you should get up. We have a big day ahead” he said. 

I looked at him with a confused expression. He smiled like he was up to no good. “Get dressed ma” he said. And so I did. I brushed my hair, brushed my teeth and put on some decent looking clothes.I didn’t know what for, all I knew was that Chris was being suspicious and it made me curious. 

“Pack a pair of clothes and swim suit” he said from outside the bathroom door. I got dressed and grabbed some clothes. He made me hold his hand as he led me to his car. “Where are we going?” I asked. “You’ll see” he said as we got into the car. Soft music played as he started the drive. 

And then all the sudden the memories hit me. The argument we had. The drinking. The crying. 

“Chris” I said. He glanced at me and then put his attention back on the road. “Yeah?” he said. “I’m so sorry. I should have never-” I tried to apologize but he instantly cut me off. “Shhh. Your okay, everythings okay” he said. “But Chris I shouldn’t have-” he cut me off once again. “Stop saying sorry. You're human. You're allowed to be human” he said before putting his hand on my thigh. 

A flashback of when Chris and I were getting to know each other hit me. 

My heart twisted at his words. “But that makes you human. You're allowed to be angry. Or even happy. Or sad” I said. I grabbed onto his hand and rubbed over his knuckles gently. His eyes locked onto mine. “You're allowed to be human” I said. 

We had been driving for an hour at this point. I stared out the window, looking at all the trees we were surrounded by. It was nice out here. Lots of nature, nowhere near the city. “Almost there” he said.

I thought about where we could be going. But I had no idea where we would end up. I didn’t know what was up Chris’s sleeve. So when we got to the destination, my mind was blown.

He parked in the driveway of a large sized cabin. “Chris what is this?” I asked. “I thought we needed a change of scenery for a day” he said, smiling. He got out of the car and walked around to my side, opening the door for me.

He grabbed my hand and led me inside. I was truly in awe at how beautiful the inside of the cabin was. We walked around the cabin admiring every inch of it. 

“Chris, this is insane” I said. He led me to the main bedroom where we would be sleeping later on. “You like it?” he asked. “I love it” I responded with a big smile on my face. 

We spent the day walking on nature trails and exploring outside. He demanded to take pictures of me so that way he could print them out and keep them in his wallet. We skipped rocks into the creek and got lost in conversation. 

The sun set and we walked back to the cabin. Chris suggested we go outside and sit in the hot tub. And it made me a little nervous. I didn’t necessarily want to wear my swimsuit. Not for any other reason than the fact I had scars on my thighs that made me deeply insecure. 

But how could I say no to Chris when he brought me all the way out here? “Gonna change in the bathroom” I said. Once I got into the bathroom I looked at myself in the mirror. Trying to get the courage to wear a bikini in front of him. Telling myself that he would never judge me.

I took off my clothes and looked down at my thighs. I stared at the scars and the scars stared back at me. I took a deep breath and put my bikini on. I wrapped a towel around my waist, hoping to hide the scars for as long as possible. 

“You ready?” he asked. I nodded my head and we headed out to the hot tub. I dropped the towel and got in first. “Oh my god. It feels so nice in here” I said, letting my body relax into the water. I watched as Chris stepped into the water. 

He sat across from me. We let the water submerge our bodies. “I love this so much” I said. He let a soft smile appear on his face. A peaceful silence fell over us. I had never felt so content before. This was something I needed for a while without realizing it. 

Chris and I sat and talked for awhile. He told me his dad reached out to him but he didn’t respond. He reminisced on the days his mom wasn’t in the hospital. We talked for an hour. Listening to each other attentively. 

“Chris I really am sorry. For overacting. And that you had to see me like that” I said. “Nothing could ever change the way I feel about you y/n. Don’t dwell on it” he said. His reassurance helped soothe my overthinking.

Chris let his body move in the water. He slowly swam closer to me, until he was right in front of me. “You're so beautiful” he said. I smiled and splashed his face with water. He reacted over dramatically, saying things like “I feel so betrayed right now” “you're so mean”.

We got out of the hot tub and went back inside. 

“Stay in the living room for a minute” he said. “Why?” I asked. “Just stay here” he said. I stood in the living room with a towel wrapped around my body as a million questions popped up in my head.

15 minutes passed before he came back into the living room. “Okay, okay come with me now” he said. “What are we doing?” I asked, still confused. Chris led me to the bedroom and before he opened the door he turned around to look at me.

He kissed my forehead without warning and then opened the door, grabbing my hand and leading me inside. The room was lit with candles, rose petals scattered around the floor,  and heart shaped balloons floating in the air. I looked on the bed. A gift basket filled with goodies, a bouquet of flowers, a teddy bear  and a sign that said “will you be my girlfriend?” 

“Chris!” I exclaimed. “Will you be my girlfriend?” he asked  while holding onto my hands. “Yes” I responded. He pulled me into him, wrapping his arms around my body. The hug lasted long. Like the last thing we wanted to do was let each other go.

But he pulled away, just enough for his face to be directly in front of mine. We stared into each other's eyes, so much being said without using actual words. “Come here, come open the gift” he said, grabbing onto my hand and leading me to the bed.

I sat down on the bed and grabbed onto the small box. “What is it” I said. “Open it” he encouraged. I ripped the wrapping paper off the small box, revealing a ring box. My heart beat picked up instantly.

I opened the box carefully, revealing the beautiful ring inside. I looked up at Chris who was smiling at me. “Promise ring” he said. Tears started to form in my eyes. “Promise ring?” I repeated, feeling an overwhelming amount of emotion hit me. I felt so loved. Beyond loved.

“Let me put it on you” he said. He took the ring and grabbed onto my hand. He slid the ring on carefully. I stared down at the ring in awe. He pulled my hand up to his mouth, kissing my knuckles softly. 

“Promise” he said. “I promise to take care of you. Every part of you. I promise that you have my unconditional love and loyalty” he continued. He wiped the tear that rolled onto my cheek. He grabbed onto the teddy bear, “what do you want to name our kid” he said.

“You're unbelievable” I said as a laugh fell from my lips. 

A couple hours passed. We watched movies in the bedroom and held each other like our life depended on it. 

“You okay?” he asked out of nowhere. “Mhm. More than okay. What about you?” I asked. “I’m okay if you're okay” he said. I looked up at him, his eyes locked onto mine. I couldn’t help but feel so lucky. Lucky to have found someone like him. Lucky to experience this life with him.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked. “You” I responded. He chuckled at my response. “I’m thinking about you too. I’m always thinking about you” he said, his hand sneaking its way under the hoodie I was wearing, rubbing his fingers gently across my bare back. 

I loved his touch, I don’t think I could ever get enough of it. My eyes flickered between his eyes and lips.The sudden need for his lips on mine made my stomach turn. “Why are you looking at me like that?” he asked. A soft giggle fell from my lips. “Like what?” I asked. “Like you're scared to kiss me” he said. 

I shrugged my shoulders, portraying fake nonchalance. “You nervous?” he asked. I nodded my head, unable to lie to him. “Why? We’ve kissed before” he said. The flashback of me riding his thigh appeared. Immediately making my body heat up. 

“I don’t want to have sex with you, I want to make love to and with you. And that scares me” he admits.

He let his hand grip onto my waist softly. His touch only made me weaker in the moment. “I don’t want to just kiss you this time” I said quietly. He nodded, like he understood what I meant. “Then what do you want, baby?” he whispered. 

“You” I responded. His hold tightened on my waist just a little. “Are you 100% sure?” he asked. “Mhm” I hummed. He grabbed onto my waist and pulled me closer into him. 

My lips brushed against his. The candles that were lit around the room flickered. The tension between us became intense and overpowering. I stared into his eyes, my heart beat racing. And then I leaned in, kissing his lips softly.

I pulled back and locked eyes with him again. Just as I was about to lean in to kiss him again he pulled back an inch. “Wait” he said. “What is it?” I said. “I need you to know that-” he paused. He sat there and scanned every inch of my face. 

“What is it Chris?” I asked. He brought his hand to my face, cupping my jaw and staring into my eyes. “I love you” he said, his voice steady even though he was filled with an overwhelming amount of emotions. 

I smiled, a genuine smile. “I love you too” I whispered. He closed the gap between us by placing a soft kiss on my lips. One kiss turned into a plethora of more. His touch was grounding and igniting at the same time.

Our bodies moved under the blankets, tangled in one another's. His mouth worked his way to my jaw and then my neck. I loved the feeling of his lips on my body. I loved it more knowing this was about to be a daily thing. 

His hands slid underneath the hoodie I wore and roamed all over my body. “Need more” I said against his lips. “I know baby, I know” he whispered. A couple more minutes passed before he helped take off my hoodie. 

My bra came off next, my bare breast fully exposed. Chris let his mouth envelope my nipple, sucking gently. My breath was already unsteady, my patience running low. I was needy and couldn’t stand the anticipation. 

His hand slid to the waistband of my pants. “Take them off” I said before he could even say anything. He chuckled at my words, loving the sense of urge and need in my voice. He slid my pants off, leaving me in my thong. 

He stared down at my tattoo, or so I thought. But when my eyes looked down to where his were, I realized he was staring at my now exposed scars. My heart beat picked up and I immediately reached for the blanket to cover my self.

“No, no, no” he said, pulling the blanket back off of me. “Chris” I said, trying to yank the blanket back but he already was tossing it onto the floor. “Don’t try to hide from me y/n” he said as my legs curled up to my chest.

“Don’t hide from me baby” he said quietly. “It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I love you y/n every part of you. Even the parts that you don't love about yourself. I love those parts 10 times more” he said in a reassuring tone. 

“Breathe baby” he whispered before grabbing onto my hand. “I love you” he said again. And it wasn’t the words that made me believe him, it was his actions. I let my legs uncurl, my thighs exposed. 

I looked down at the scars and then back up at him. He smiled softly and squeezed my hand. “You're okay” he said. In that moment I realized how much I actually trusted him. How much I trusted him with my heart, my body and my soul.

I leaned in, kissing his lips like it was the only proper response I had. He melted into the kiss, his body reacting after every kiss. My lips moved to his neck, sucking lightly but enough to leave marks.

His jaw tightened and his breathing picked up pace. And he tried to contain himself, he really did. But your touch made him weak. It made him crave more. He let himself bask in your touch for a little longer before the need became too much.

He moved with precision, he repositioned your body to lay flat against the bed. You watched as he spread your legs open and laid between your legs, his head directly in front of your clothed entrance. 

Your heart beat picked up as his eyes landed on yours. “Can I take it off?” he asked referring to your thong. You nodded your head and within seconds you were fully naked and exposed.

My breathing picked up. He placed gentle kisses over the scars on my thighs. “I love you” he said, lowering the kisses. “So much” he said before kissing the top of my pussy. “I love you too” I said, the heat growing between my legs.

And then as if the words sparked something in him he licked a stripe from the bottom of my entrance all the way to the top. The action made me squirm. “Stay still baby” he said and I nodded my head. 

He licked against my clit, a whimper escaping my lips. He flicked his tongue against my clit in circles, my hands wrapped in his messy hair. He loved the way your moans sounded. It gave him motivation to make you a mess.

He stuck a finger inside your pussy, loving the way it slid inside smoothly due to how wet you are. He continued to lick your sensitive bud while penetrating his finger. Moans fell from your mouth like lullabies. 

He studied your body and face as he stuck another finger inside. He watched you closely, wanting to give you as much pleasure as possible. He continued to suck on your clit, causing your legs to try and close around his head.

But he quickly grabbed onto your legs and held them open. “You're doing good baby, so good” he said before continuing to eat you out like it was his life’s purpose. You pulled on his hair, your legs shaking and your orgasm arriving. 

“Chris” I whined as his fingers pushed in and out. The band in my belly snapped, my legs shaking and my mind in a haze. Chris continued to lick up your juices, loving the way you made a mess just for him.

He moved up to kiss me, the taste of myself on his lips. My chest heaved, my body weak from the orgasm. “You okay? Do you wanna stop?” he asked. I shook my head no, I didn’t want to stop. In fact I needed him inside me more than ever right now.

“You sure?” he asked. “Mhm” I hummed. 

I watched as he took his clothes off, his body naked and exposed in front of me for the first time. His size made me hesitate just the slightest. Intimidation at its finest. But I trusted him. And I needed him. 

He aligned himself with my entrance. “Gonna go slow with you, okay?” he said. I nodded my head. I watched as he lowered himself, letting his cock be enveloped by my walls. A gasp fell from my lips. 

“You okay?” he asked, analyzing my energy and facial expressions. “Yes i’m just- fuck” I cried out, the sensations feeling too good. “I’m gonna go all the way in baby, just tell me if you need me to stop” he said.

I grabbed onto his bicep and gasped as I wasn’t aware he wasn’t all the way in yet. But he pushed farther inside of me and I had suddenly felt an overwhelming amount of pleasure. “Fuck” I cried out. 

“It’s okay baby, i’m right here” he said, his movements coming to a halt  to let me adjust once he was fully inside me. Our eyes locked, so much trust and desire. So much love. His hand found my jaw, he caressed my face gently. 

And then he started moving, his dick pushing in and out slowly. Moans fell from my lips instantly, my body in such a blissful state. His strokes were deep and slow, the pace just right. “Chris” I cried out, grabbing onto his bicep as if it would help keep me together.

Our eyes locked as he thrusted inside me. “I know baby, you're doing so good” he praised. He started to pick up his pace, his breathing matching mine. “Fuck” he panted before reaching his hand down and circling my sensitive bud with his fingers. 

“I can’t- so good- so good” I whined, not able to form a proper sentence. His eyes stared down into mine, “I love you” he said before his lips crashed into mine. My nails dug into his back as our tongues swirled around each other. 

He was losing himself in you, but he didn’t care. He loved the way your body melted into his. He loved the way you consumed him. He was in awe at the way you felt against him.

As my orgasm approached I looked around the room and watched the candles dancing flame, my vision on the verge of getting blurry. I felt high, I felt lost in love. He moved my hair out of my face.

His thrust became sloppy close to the edge. “I love you so fucking much” he said, passion seeping in his words. “I love-fuck- I love you too” I said. The sensations became too much, my mind was numb and my body in shambles.

“Your okay, come for me baby” he said. And just like that I was a whimpering mess. The belly in my band snapped and my body gave out. “That’s it baby, that’s it” he said, his voice soft and encouraging. Seconds later his seed spilled inside me as he buried his face in my neck. 

We laid still for a couple minutes, our sweaty and sticky bodies stuck together. He kissed all over my cheeks and smoothing over my hair. Once our breaths were steady he pulled out of me, immediately going to grab a warm cloth to clean up the mess between my thighs.

He was so gentle and cautious that it made me want to cry. 

After changing the sheets of the bed he picked me up and placed me onto the bed. We got under the covers and our bodies immediately tangled into one another's. His arms wrapped around my body.

We laid there, wrapped around one another until we fell asleep.

taglist: @velvetspideruniverse @courta13 @sharkattack032005 @sugarontop88 @wrathfulquakemarauder @nessabarrettlover101

[magicaldice]

Synopsis for Divine Lover: Chris and Y/n happened to meet under unfortunate circumstances. But the question is do you blame coincidence or fate?

⚠︎ : read at your own leisure. this series will include sensitive topics. mental health issues. violence. substance abuse. smut.

part 5

pervious part. series masterlist.

I woke up feeling like I had the best sleep of my life. But in a matter of seconds my body froze. My heart skipped a beat once I realized Chris’s arms were wrapped around my waist. The thing is it almost felt natural. 

And then almost as if he could hear me thinking he stirred awake. He instantly removed his arms from my waist and sat up. He looked over at me and gave a tired smile. “You sleep okay?” I asked.

“Yeah. Think that was the best I slept in awhile” he admitted. I smiled. He ran his hands through his messy hair. “Swear it feels like you put melatonin in the popcorn last night or something. I never sleep so easily like that” he said. 

He stared off into space for a moment. Like he was in his own world. “I should probably head home. Got a bunch of stuff to do today” he said. I nodded my head. We got off the bed and walked into the living room.

I hated the fact that I dreaded him leaving. He put his shoes on and grabbed his phone off the coffee table. “I’ll see you around, yeah?” he said. I smiled and nodded my head. He stood there for a second, just staring at me like he wanted to say something. 

And then he stepped closer to me. “Thank you” he said. “For what?” I asked. And that’s when he pulled me into a hug without warning. His arms wrapped my waist, his touch gentle and firm at the same time. 

The hug was genuine. Lasting for a few moments longer than a casual hug. We pulled back from each other and he smiled. “I’ll see you around ma” he said. And then I watched him walk out of my front door.

2 days passed since I had seen or heard from Chris. He had been on my mind more than anything else. Wake up in the morning and think about Chris. Before falling asleep at night, think about Chris. 

He hadn’t texted. He hadn’t called. 

So I decided to reach out first. 

He texted back quickly. Telling me he wanted to see me he had just been busy the last couple days. And just when I thought he was going to say he wasn’t free to hangout he had texted me that he’s on his way over. 

“So what are you doing for Christmas?” he asked as we sat on my bed. Christmas was a month away. Something I dreaded. I went to Mia’s place for thanksgiving this year. Even though what I really wanted to do was lock myself in my room and sleep.

 “Don’t know. To be honest I hate the holidays” I said. “Why?” he asked, genuinely curious. “Just reminds me of the family I don’t have” I said truthfully. 

“I feel that” he said. “You wanna do something together?” he asked. I gave him a skeptical look. “You and your family don’t celebrate?” I asked. “We usually do. But not this year” he said. “Why not?” I asked.

He looked away. “My mom” he said blankly. I looked at him, waiting for an explanation. “ She’s been in the hospital for about 4  months now” he said. My stomach turned. “I’m sorry” I said softly. “It’s okay” he said, giving a faux smile.

“You and your mom close?” I asked. He nodded his head. “I’d do anything for her” he said. I could tell he meant what he was saying. “That’s why my dad and I bump heads alot” he said. “Your parents don't get along or something?” I asked. 

“No. They do. Well they did. But my dad and I have always had issues. And they just got worse over time” he said. I listened carefully as he spoke. “The first month of my mom being in the hospital I found him cheating on her with another woman” he continued. 

I started to feel sick as he continued to talk about his relationship with his dad. Explaining the abuse he received was always there throughout his childhood. Emotional and physical. He noted that it way less often when his mom was around. Because she protected him in so many aspects.

 But once his mom was out of the house and in the hospital, the abuse had amplified. He said he never hit his dad back out of respect. Out of love. And that hitting his dad back was the last thing he ever wanted to do.

But he said once he found another woman in the house that wasn’t his mom, the dad’s mistress, he lost control and finally hit him back after all these years. I could hear the grief in his voice. It was real and raw. 

The conversation started to get more deeper as time went by. The topics switched from childhood dreams to religion. From regrets and mistakes to hopes and desires. We were so consumed with each other’s presence that we didn’t realize how much time had gone by. 

It was nearing 2 am and we were still talking. But our positions had moved. Our bodies laid against the bed facing each other. “I wish I knew you sooner” he said. I smiled at his words. 

Chris’s phone started to ring. And my eye’s automatically looked at the caller ID. Not intentionally, kind of just happened. But this time I noticed it wasn’t his dad calling. It said a girl's name. 

He pressed decline quickly and then looked at me. Just as we were about to continue our conversation his phone rang again. “You can answer the call Chris” I said. He looked at me, his eyebrows furrowing. “Dont want to” he said blankly.

And then the thought crossed over me. A girlfriend. I don’t know why I didn’t come to the realization sooner. But now that I did I felt kind of weird. Chris and I are friends. Strictly friends I thought to myself.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, noticing the immediate energy shift. “Nothing” I said hoping my energy wouldn’t give me away. “Your bad at lying” he said. “I just don’t want your girlfriend to think something is going on between us. Should just answer her calls” I said.

He looked at me with a look of confusion. “Girlfriend?” he said. And then I felt a wave of confusion cross over me. “I mean yeah” I said. “Wait- sorry I don’t know why I just jumped to conclusions” I said feeling slightly embarrassed. 

He let a light chuckle fall from his lips. “I don’t have a girlfriend” he said as he tried not to laugh at the pink tint spreading across my cheeks. I covered my face with my hands, shaking my head.

“Do you have a boyfriend?” he asked. I shook my head no. “Never really had a boyfriend” I admit. “Really?” he asked, his eyes widening like he was shocked at the fact.. I nodded my head. 

“What about you? How many girlfriends have you had?” I asked. “Never been in a relationship unless you count the girl I dated in 6th grade for 2 days” he said, a light laugh escaping his mouth.

“But you mess around with girls?” I asked before thinking. He shrugged his shoulders again. He paused before responding. He wasn't about to tell you that he couldn't mess around with other girls recently. Not that he didn't want to, he just couldn't. The only girl that he could focus on nowadays was you.

“All the girls I mess around with know it’s no strings attached” he says nonchalantly. I nodded my head, suddenly feeling smaller than before.

I was well aware that Chris was just my friend. It’s just the fact that he seemed so experienced that made me feel awkward. I damn near had no experience when it came to messing around with guys. 

The only experience I had was losing my virginity to a guy who ghosted me the next day. After that I refused to let myself be touched by another human. It had been 2 years since I had been touched. Simply because I couldn't trust anyone touching me after that.

“Why you getting so quiet?” he asked, observing my energy. “Just tired” I said. “Your not allowed to lie to me” he said. I hated how observant he was sometimes. I shrugged my shoulders. 

“Is it something I said?” he asked. “No. I just get in my head sometimes” I confessed. “Come here” he said. “Huh?” I said. But he was already pulling me into his body. 

His arms wrapped around me. The sudden action made my stomach do the flip thing. “No need to be in your head” he said as he ran his hand through my hair. Instant butterflies piled in my stomach.

He held onto me, spooning my body and playing with my hair. “Too pretty for all that” he whispered against my ear. His touch was soothing and grounding. My eyes were getting heavier by the second.

I tried so hard to fight the sleepy feeling. But it got harder and harder. I heard Chris let out a soft laugh. “Stop fighting your sleep” he said. “Mmm. Never. Sleep is for the weak” I said. His hand gripped onto my waist a little tighter. “Go to sleep mama” he said quietly.

And I tried, really tried, to stay awake. But while he held onto my waist and played with my hair I drifted off into sleep within minutes.

Chris loved how I fell asleep in his arms. He loved it so much that the more he stayed up that night and thought about it, it scared him. But he was good at hiding how he felt from a young age. 

He knew better than to ask god to make this a daily thing. He knew better than to look at you with nothing but sincere real, deep, emotion. He knew better than to fall for someone like you. Someone who was so pure. So raw and genuine. 

He closed his eyes. He knew better. But you gave him a feeling that nobody else has. You made him feel real. You made him feel safe and cared for. You made him feel human again.