I Destroyed a Toilet
Oh my god, this is so embarrassing. I had a really big breakfast this morning and I think I added a bit too much creamer to my coffee because the whole morning I was feeling absolute bloated. And worse we had a meeting. The entire time was in my chair, trying to look professional but inside I could just feel the heavy weight in my guts, churning. I one hundred percent knew I was going to need to take a shit as soon as possible. And it was going to be messy.
I tried to act calmly as I could once the meeting, which felt like it took forever, finally ended. I grabbed my stuff, set it down at my desk and headed to the toilet. Unfortunately for me it seemed like a lot of the other men had had the same idea. When I first walked in all the stalls were taken. I frowned as I turned around walked back out feeling my gut gurgle in protest. I really needed a bathroom now. I head back to my desk, and proceeded to stake out the bathroom waiting for an opening as I desperately tried to keep my aching bowels in check.
it seemed however like the toilet gods were messing with me. As soon as a man would leave the toilets, another would be right there to take his place, leaving home high and dry. I moaned, but tried to keep it softly to myself. I really needed to fart, but with my stomach aching, I wasn’t sure I could trust it. I didn’t realize too how torturous it would be to take note of the other men getting to release. I noticed one of my co-workers head into the bathroom and stay in there for a good twenty minutes before re-emerging having no doubt taken a great day shit.
I had waited about thirty minutes when finally there was an opening for me, and I speed walked into the bathroom. Inside only one stall was unoccupied, and hurried into it, ready to unleashed. But I stopped myself much to my gurgling stomach and quaking bowels’ anger. There was no toilet paper! It seemed it had been all used up. Fuck! I held my gut and stepped out of the stall. I noticed Jayson, my preppy co-worker in the next stall, his gray pinstriped pants and bright blue briefs around his ankles. He was pushing out a monsterous shit that splattered against the toilet bowl as he grunted. There was no way he was getting up anytime soon.
Ughhh. I had been holding my shit in for so long and I knew that I needed to empty my bowls soon. I had another meeting scheduled and if I didn’t find a toilet to take a shit in, I wasn’t sure I would be able to make it through the meeting without crapping myself. I hurried upstairs to see if that bathroom was free, walking as fast as I could while clenching the hell out of my cheeks. Only to get to the bathroom and find that’s stalls were out of order. I could hear my stomach gurgling and my asshole was pulsing, ready to push my massive load out. I needs to find another bathroom NOW!
I ran out of the men’s and rounded the corner and spotted the Executive’s Bathroom, a private bathroom that is for single use for the higher ups. I hesitated but a bubbling sound and cramp that made me hug my midsection decide for me as I all but ran inside and close tube door, locking it and fumbled with my belt, yanking down my pants and my blue and white briefs to my knees as I mounted that porcelain seat. Instantly I let go and my bowels erupted.
Long soft mushy logs of shit blasted out of me, not quite diarrhea, but definitely a shitload. My eyes rolled in the back of my head as I farted into the bowl, the logs crackling as they broke atop one another and filling the bowl. I probably sat there continuously shitting for about five minutes, my bowels and stomach emptying. When I was done I wiped and went to flush the toilet.
Only it didn’t flush. I started to panic, jiggling the handle desperately, trying to get it to do anything, but nothing worked. My massive bubbling soup of sewage had filled the toilet and the toilet wouldn’t flush. I had no cool what to do, and I didn’t want to get in trouble for using the Executive’s Bathroon so I just washed my hands and… uh… left.
The coast was clear in the hall so I just went back about my day, pretending like nothing had happened.
Hopefully no one finds out.