WIG REVIEW: ONCE UPON A TIME...IN HOLLYWOOD
Bring on the brunch cocktails: Quentin Tarantino’s second to last (?) movie is here! How will we resurrect the careers of ‘90s hasbeens or know what ‘60s deep cuts to listen to after that?! If your answer is the Duffer Brothers, no thank you please. Anyway, let’s focus on this one, which does for the Manson murders what Inglorious Basterds did for the holocaust. But what about the wigs? Let’s discuss.
As you can see from these stills in which Brad Pitt basically has morphed into prime Robert Redford, this film is mainly wigless and better for it. It’s 1969 in Hollyweird, and Pitt plays Leonardo DiCaprio’s stunt double and most of the film is them being very handsome brunch buddies who I would love to sit around with eating pizza and watching old episodes of FBI. Pitt’s character’s main offense is being a dude who wears moccasins which is an indefensible crime no matter what the decade is.
There are occasional wigs - which are wigs within the narrative - as seen here as Pitt wears a wig to double DiCaprio’s character. For the most part, these wigs are fine and since we know they are wigs, are pretty good!
But here we get into some murky wig gaslighting! As in other films where there are wigs which we understand to be wigs within the narrative of the film, as with this wig DiCaprio wears in the pilot of a western, BUT these wigs are just as good as wigs being passed off as actual hair! WHAT.
Again, here is a wig that we know to be a circa 1969 wig DiCaprio’s character wears in a western TV pilot.
And here is a wig that DiCaprio’s character tries to pass off as ACTUAL HAIR THAT HE GREW OUT IN ITALY at the end of the film (apologies for photo quality - there aren’t many images of this wig). Regardless, this wig is not as good! The quality is terrible and as with all bad man wigs, it juts out at the back. WIG GASLIGHTING STRIKES AGAIN!
Here’s another look at this damn thing. The wig DiCaprio wears in that damn western TV show is superior!! FOR SHAME.
Elsewhere, there are other bad man wigs lurking in every corner. We only get a few glimpses of this dude who plays Roman Polanski but none of them are great.
And beyond the bad wig, I’m pretty sure this costume came directly from the set of Austin Powers. Thanks, Mike Myers?
And just look at this frizzed out mess passing itself off as Steve McQueen. THE HORROR.
Many have found the portrayal of Bruce Lee to be troubling, but not enough has been said about how bad this wig is also! WHY CAN NO ONE MAKE THE BACK TAPER OF A MAN WIG WURQ?! WHY!
AND THEN THERE’S CHARLIE. I regret to inform you that this actor has played Charles Manson in like 2 other things and truly: WHAT A CAREER? I hope the other projects have superior wigs at least because WOOF.
Still this movie is pretty fun if you like: alternate realities, famous people playing other famous people, the children of famous people playing hippies, highly trained dogs, this one part that you think is gonna be like Psycho but then you remember Bruce Dern is in this, Emile Hirsch looking svelte, different hippies with dirty feet, the need to wikipedia some facts, ‘60s songs you forgot existed, and honestly a lot of flamethrowers. It also has made me realize my new life goal to be: Leonardo DiCaprio floating around a pool at midnight listening to a reel-to-reel in shortie pajamas drinking frozen margaritas directly out of the blender. So worth it?
VERDICT: DOESN’T WURQ (BUT YOU’RE WELCOME FOR THIS GIF)
