32!!!!!! That’s my life right now. Have Z be the one to tell him and be afraid
— marissa11586
32. “I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.”
This is definitely not the Thai food delivery person he was expecting when he opened the front door.
“Zend-”
“Because I’ve never felt anything like this before,” she rushes on, not appearing to care in the least about cutting him off. “I mean, I’m eighteen, what the hell would I know about being in love? I’ve barely even dated, let alone been in a real relationship, so there’s a very good possibility that I have completely lost my mind.” she swallows thickly. “But you’re- you’re you, y’know? You’re Val and even though we met in one of the weirdest ways, we still met for a reason, and it wasn’t just so I could learn how to dance.
“My life is different and I know there are a million reasons for that but I feel like you’re the biggest one.” she confesses. “And it sounded crazy, you know, when Dom brought it up a few days ago. That I might love you for real. That’s what I told her- that she was crazy. But then I couldn’t stop thinking about it and I haven’t been able to eat or sleep or think since then and I feel like I can’t breathe anymore because the more I think about it, the more it makes sense and the more I realize the signs have been there since the beginning. Well, maybe not the actual day but within the first week or two, for sure.” she quickly corrects herself.
“And I know it’s scary, because you’re your age and I’m... not and people are gonna think it’s weird, because it is but it’s still there. And you probably think I’m crazy and it’s just this weird crush and I get that,” she assures him, “-but I do know crushes and this isn’t just some thing where you make me blush or my heart speeds up when I think about you. It’s like nothing is enough, and I miss you even when you’re right next to me and the thought of not having you in my life makes me sick because I don’t want to exist in a world where you don’t. And when we dance together it’s magic,” she says desperately. “And no matter how many concerts I give or crazy things I do, nothing will ever be able to make me feel more alive. And I know this came from out of nowhere and I showed up here without any warning and I’m sorry, but I just... had to tell you before I lost my nerve.” she finally finishes. “And I’m done now. That’s all I have.”
For a moment, there’s silence, only the rustling of leaves in the wind sounding between them still standing in the doorway of his LA condo.
“I just... I need a second.” he says finally. “That’s a lot of words to process in less than three minutes. Did you even breathe?”
Zendaya gives a weak laugh. “I told you I gave that up a few days ago.”
“Right, right.” he nods, running a hand over his face.
“...you don’t have to say anything.” she offers after another few beats of silence. “I can go and we can just pretend this never happened-”
“No,” he says quickly. “I know what I want to say, it’s just... after that monster you just delivered, my response seems pretty lackluster.”
Z shrugs. “Try me.”
“I can’t- I just...” Val chuckles a bit before finally announcing, “Ditto.”
She frowns. “Ditto?”
“I told you it was lackluster.”
“But- I don’t understand.” Zendaya shakes her head. “What-”
“Everything you just said. Well, maybe not everything. It was Maks and Alex, not Dom, and it happened a year and a half ago, but for the most part, yeah.” he says simply. “Everything you just said? Me too.”
“You too,” she repeats dumbly.
“Yeah.”
“All of it.”
“Yes.”
“So you mean-”
“Yeah.”
“And you want-”
“I do.”
“With me.”
Val laughs easily. “Yeah, with you.”
“Oh.” This really wasn’t turning out how she’d expected. Which was probably why she was still standing there wearing a look of complete bewilderment on her face. “So... what now?”
“Well... I ordered Thai food.” he offers after a moment. “Do you want to come in?”
And for the first time since she arrived on his doorstep, Zendaya smiles.
MUWAHHHH, Marissa!! Love you sweetheart. Please know, you and your family are always in my thoughts. I hope everything works out for you and I wish you every happiness.
MARISSA SOPHIA ESMERALDA TATIANA GENEVIEVE NICOLETTE ELIZABETH MELESKE.
Happy Birthday you hoe. :)
marissa11586 You, my dear, are one super special lady. You never fail to make me smile with your quick remarks and fabulous attitude, along with an inspiringly (is that word?) optimistic outlook (usually) on the world. Thanks for sticking with me on this rollercoaster. I consider my seat one of the best since it's right next to you.
