Happiness - Now or Later?
In the late 60s and early 70s a well know study was undertaken at Stanford University called the Marshmallow experiment. Children were put in a room with a marshmallow in front of them and told that if they don't eat the marshmallow, they can have two later. I'm not sure what the results were, I think it was around 50/50, but that wasn't what was important. The children remained under observation for many years post the experiment and it was found that those who delayed gratification (didn't eat the marshmallow) were more successful in later life. I get on incredibly well with my brother, even though we have only lived in the same country for about one of the last ten years, and see each other around twice a year, we are very close. We are also very similar in a lot of ways, but, I've often thought, different in one key way: That is that I've always thought that you needed to do what you need to do in order to be happy (i.e. wait for two marshmallows) as demonstrated by my career in London, while he has always thought you should just be happy (i.e. eat the marshmallow) as demonstrated by... well... many things! Which of us has been happier I really couldn't tell you, we've both been fortunate enough to do incredible things, have both been and both are, extremely happy. Is his way of getting there better than mine or mine than his? I really couldn't say. Interestingly more recently we have come back to more similar paths: I quit everything in search of adventure, and he has a great job, is working incredibly hard and is smashing it up in the UK. As the marshmallow experiment showed I think it is vital to keep an eye on the future and to work towards longer term goals or one won't have the means to be successful or to be happy. But living too much for the future will ensure one thing alone; life will pass you by - you'll end up with a massive pile of marshmallows and no time to eat them! I don't pretend to have an answer but I know for my part I want to take a note out of my brothers book, and start living more for the day, while I would say he has taken one out of mine, and started to build and plan so he can achieve his goals in the future. I think the place I've got to is: "Live for today, with an eye on tomorrow". Let's see how we get on... (P.S. Bro, feel free to argue my perspective on the last 5+ years of your life!!!!)