#marvel-shitpost

[polyvenger]

do you have a masterlist? if so, could I get the link? if not thats fine. thanksssss :) you're blog is amazing

Wow okay so I don’t know how this only came into my inbox NOW (it’s literally been eight months tumblr that’s new levels of bad) but a very belated thank you for the kind words. I haven’t updated much because I didn’t realize anyone was following me (that one’s entirely on me, not Tumblr haha) but I’ll get back into it. And no masterlist now - I’m finishing up my last semester of college, so once I do that, I want to finally sit down and write some story ideas I’ve been bouncing around since I made this blog. So check back in a little while! 

[tired-gay-void]

the next in the marvel shit-post series ft. ideas from my best friend (content warning for minor gore, guns and violence)

A small crime group is gathered in a desolate warehouse where they have been bunked, laying low for a while. Some sleep, some play cards, the rest are on lookout. Their momentary piece is shattered at the same moment a window is, blanketing the floor with shards of glass, followed by the body of the man closest to the window. A bullet hole is clearly visible in the centre of his forehead. The entire room erupts into chaos.

“FUCK! FUCK!”

“WE’RE BEING SHOT AT!”

“WHO THE FUCK KNEW WE WERE HERE?!”

Bullets from an unseen gun continue to pick off members of the group through the window. Eventually, not a single one remains standing. As the last one goes down, Frank Castle discards his now empty magazine in the building opposite and adjusts his hideously garish sunglasses. As he surveys the dead quiet room (pun fully intended), he takes another pair of equally ugly sunglasses from his gun bag, cleans them solemnly on his shirt and places them on his head backwards. As he does so, he nods and says gruffly,

“Nice”

[tired-gay-void]

while I work on numerous assignments and some self-indulgent painting practice, have some stupid shit that my best friend and I came up with

Matt Murdock is sitting at his desk in the office, calmly reading a braille document. On his face is a pair of ridiculously large pair of sunglasses. Just then, Foggy Nelson bursts through the door, holding a bag full of coffee and papers falling out of his satchel.

“COFFEE WAS ON SALE SO I BOUGHT THREE JARS OF IT!” 

He breaks off as Matt turns in his direction and whips off his hideous shades to reveal the second, smaller pair underneath. They are just as garish, and from what Foggy can tell, he is also wearing his usual shades underneath these ones.

He turns, confused, towards Karen in the other room. She turns to face him ever so slowly on her Evil Villain Style Swivel Chair™️. Foggy is taken aback at the fact that she is managing to wear multiple pairs of horrendous sunglasses simultaneously, each pair stacked precariously on top of the one below.

Completely without emotion, (though you would barely be able to tell anyway), she looks him up and down, pulls out two pairs of sunglasses -- one from each pocket -- and says to Foggy,

“Your turn.”