Jul 23
Recent art I've done of me and Matthew. I've been really needing him so much. I just need my baby bat to hold me 🖤🖤🖤 I love you, Matty
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Recent art I've done of me and Matthew. I've been really needing him so much. I just need my baby bat to hold me 🖤🖤🖤 I love you, Matty
Anyway I'm in love with him and he's my baby bat 🖤🖤🖤
I got to walk on a piece of Indian history. Beautiful, amazing, a once in a lifetime opportunity. I dressed in my Matthew shirt, miniskirt, fishnets, and combat boots; clothes that I knew he'd find cute. Took my ita bag, wore him around my neck.
On the way, beautiful songs played, like "The Diving Bell" by The Crane Wives (relevant, and lines like "I am all in, no matter how this ends"; "I am not afraid to give you everything" expound on my devotion), Bloodywood songs, "Angel Baby" by Rosie & The Originals which is something I call my Matty, all making me feel so connected to him.
I had a wonderful time and loved every second <3 On the way back home, "I Don't Care if You're Contagious" played on my Bluetooth, which is one of our songs. And in the distance, seemingly out of nowhere right as the song started, I saw a giant red heart statue, which was not there last time I was in the area. Tons of tiger lilies, my favorite flower that I imagine he always picks for me when he sees them. "Yaad" by Bloodywood played not long after, another of our songs.
I felt completely immersed in Matthew, like he was there with me, his arms around me, encouraging me to rest. There was a firm hold on me that had me feeling safe and euphoric. I may not have been able to move much after (I'm disabled and that trek was physically exerting), but it was worth it. I would do it again if it meant I could feel this connected with you, my love
Matthew, you're always there for me in so many ways. You prove your love to me again and again, over and over. I feel you everywhere. See you everywhere. A full moon ended that day with perfection. The day filled with you, your love, your culture, and so many of my favorite things. I love you so much, Matty. You're my soulmate, and I can't get enough of you 🖤🦇🌹