If you couldn't already tell by this chicken scratch I like to call my handwriting, it's Matt. I'm not really sure where to begin or what really to say here, but you're leaving tomorrow for your fashion internship in Paris and there is something that I really need to tell you. It's been on my mind for a long time now and I'm not really sure what else to do... that's why I'm writing you this letter. To get rid of my inner demons and say the unsaid things between us, even if it is only on paper. You'll probably never see this, because I probably won't have the balls to give it to you, and if for some reason you do see it, please understand that this is something that is left better unspoken, for I am not one of too many words, and I think you know that. I've tried to say this before, but I haven't found the right way or time to do it. It seems like every time I want to, there's something or someone standing in my way. A letter might not be the best option, but considering our history and the way denial seems to be a genetic trait in your genes, I simply can't face you when you find what goes on in my head. I hope you understand.
I'm in love with you, Adele, as cheesy as it may sound. Everything about you brings a smile to my face, even the bad stuff. My heart stops when you speak, my breathing ceases when you touch me, and nothing else in this world matters to me other than you when you laugh. I love the way you frown when you're confused, and how you narrow your eyes when you get pissed off at me. It's precisely when you get pissed off at me that I feel the overwhelming need to kiss you, to hold you.
Destiny might sound like something out of a chick flick movie; something people believe in to give meaning to their lives. I would totally lose man points if Ray ever saw this, and even though I want to believe destiny doesn't exist... unfortunately, I can't. Because I do believe in destiny. It's what brought you into my life.
Sometimes we don't get along -- actually, a lot of the time we don't get along, but I think that's because we've been trying to deny this for so long. Or, at least I've been trying to deny it. The thought of your rejection has made me keep you at arms length since you walked away from me before prom, despite the fact that we're still friends.
But that doesn't change the fact that I love you. You always know when I'm sad or upset. You have an innate gift to figure me out, and to be quite honest, it freaks me out most of the time. But, as I think about it more and more, I begin to realize that's why we belong together. We get each other. We know each other.
I hope you feel the same way I feel about you; I hope you've been denying your feelings for as long as I have and you're just scared, because otherwise I'm just making a fool of myself. The only purpose for this letter is to get the words out of my chest. Maybe that might help me breath whenever you're around. But, if by any chance you find this letter, there's one thing I ask of you: if your feelings don't match mine, please look for me and give this letter back. We're friends first and foremost and that won't change, whether you're in love with me or you're still convinced you love Baker. I'll be crushed, but I'll be there whenever you need me. Because I love you.
You are my everything, now and forever.
Matt folded the letter carefully and slid it into the plain white envelope, careful not to fold it more than necessary. Grabbing the pen back off of the desk, he quickly wrote Adele's name on the front in the best handwriting he could manage and turned it over, trailing his lips slowly over the flap until he was able to press it closed and seal it.He placed it down flat on the desk, his gaze dropping down to study it for a moment before he sighed and snatched it up, getting to his feet and tossing it in the trash can. This was stupid - some things were better left unspoken. And with that thought, he quickly exited the Windsor's office and made his way out the door, closing it behind him and passing Adele in the hallway. He only mumbled a quick hello to her without much thought and fled before he was able to realize that she was making her way into the office.
After her encounter with Matt, Adele continued on her way down the hall, taking a left before she pushed the office door open. In her hands were the stack of envelopes that she'd just retrieved from the mailbox. She shuffled through them quickly, only finding one addressed to her and set the rest down on her fathers desk before she tore it open and quickly read over the college bullshit that had probably been sent out to every other North Shore student that had graduated that year. Shaking her head, she made her way over to the trash can to toss it but paused when she suddenly noticed another letter made out to her in very familiar handwriting. Curiously, Adele snatched it up and tore it open, unfolding the letter to reveal Matt's messy handwriting. Her brow furrowed in confusion but her features softened as she read over each and every word, a smile playing out on her lips.
'But, if by any chance you find this letter, there's one thing I ask of you: if your feelings don't match mine, please look for me and give this letter back.'
She thought about it for a moment before she carefully folded the letter back up and tucked it into the pocket on her jeans. Taking a seat in the chair at her fathers desk, she grabbed the pen that had been used only moments ago, as well as a fresh piece of paper and began to write.
Dear Matt, I'm keeping your letter...
