Hey y'all it's MBM and I wish I didn't have to spell this out for you but it is entirely inappropriate and reprehensible to send folks anons w sui baiting, I don't care if you're baiting the character and not the person behind the blog.
Like, seriously. Do not go to blogs of folks and tell them to do that, it's not funny nor is it cute. I don't care if it's about the character or headcanons you have about the character or feelings you have about the character, you do not do that. You do not know the person behind the blog. You do not know what they have been through. Those words go to a real person and can be extremely triggering.
I'll be frank - I don't mind talking about mental health topics myself, I have been trained for this, and Barry (do NOT assume other blogs are okay with this) will respond to asks if they are in an appropriate range. I do and will try to tag any posts with sensitive material. But sui or sh baiting is NEVER appropriate and can have a serious impact on a real, living person.
Knock that off. Be better than that. And remember:
I love you, and you are important, and the world would be worse off without you.
I really hope this isn't too intrusive to ask, but I've heard some rumours recently that you're asexual. Assuming that's true (and please forgive me if it isn't), if it isn't TMI for you, what are your feelings on sex?
I'm asexual myself, (one who falls more on the repulsed end of the spectrum) and I've been struggling with my thoughts and opinions on sex and it's surrounding subject matter lately, and I'd really appreciate a fellow ace's perspective, if you're open to sharing. No pressure either way, though. Thank you so much 💕
- ⭐️
(Also to MBM, thank you so much for this blog! I've been reading through the backlog and the way you write Barry is so sweet and in character. Please keep up the good work 💖)
I don't mind at all, my dear. I do indeed identify as asexual! I like to color my wrist with the flag, it's so pretty!
Personally, I'm more sex-neutral, sex-positive.. I mean - it's enjoyable, and I don't mind engaging with it, but I don't necessarily seek it out for my own sake! Of course, there are several types of attraction, but I'll admit that some of them are a bit beyond my scope! Aesthetic attraction, now, I'm all sorts of interested in! I suppose it would depend on what your thoughts and opinions are, and how you struggle with them - but know, dear, that they don't change your worth as a person or change how you choose to identify - it is your identity and your choice. Always!
[The little pink beauty blendbird eyes you curiously, tilting as though to beckon you closer.
You're very welcome, my dear! I'm so glad you enjoy. If you're looking for things about asexuality specifically, I do have one post on it here -> https://www.tumblr.com/asking-barry-styles/792804447523880960/omg-no-im-so-sorry-i-didnt-mean-to-make-you?source=share
As someone who is also sex-repulsed, I hear you! My feelings on sex are generally that I do not want to do it and have no interest in it IRL - I don't mind fictional all that much, though I don't go out of my way to read or look at anything that I haven't written myself. Of course, sensual attraction is different than sexual attraction - I stand on my little soap box and give the five types of attraction lecture to the impassioned crowd - I enjoy kisses, hugs, cuddling, any physical contact that does not involve below the belt is cool with me!
Do I sometimes get a faint sense of arousal every month or so? Sure. Doesn't make me less ace! We're all over different spectrums, and there are folks that are really into it and folks not, folks that have more arousal and some with none at all. However you choose to identify is up to you, no matter what anyone else says, and you are valid in that identity!
I do love talking about this sort of subject though! You're always free to ask questions of me or Barry - or even Lyric and Des, at @beseechingbooks - so long as you know I will not hesitate to yap!
While the nature of this blog is not inherently explicit, I ask no minors interact in case of more NSFW asks! I will start blocking followers that do not have their age/approx age listed as well as those under 18!
NSFW asks allowed, but please don't be too explicit! Try to keep it within the realm of what the game itself would allow! If it's too much I'll let ya know, but like, it'd be hardcore smut at that point,
Asks, chatting, and roleplay are all fair game! All ships are fair game! Magic anons are cool too!
This Barry is portrayed as AuDHD and as asexual, panromantic, and you're welcome to ask about it! (Person behind the screen (MBM) is Autistic and is also asexual, panromantic!)
Want to be remembered, even as an anon? Feel free to tag yourself at the end with a little identifier/name!
In general, try to be respectful! Thank you, dearies! (At least, please be respectful to the person behind the screen - if you want to be mean to Barry that's fine, so long as you can stomach the consequences of your actions lol.)
If no asks, other Barry content will be in the queue with #queue-tip!
If I (not Barry, often referring to myself as muse behind make-up) am the one talking, I'll try to tag it with #mbm yaps!
Disclaimer lol: like i said this blog is open to any pairing and i'm not judging ppl with other tastes, i am at heart a multishipping nightmare who will listen to just about any hear me out over a pairing so to be concise i did what i had to do, a tier-list:
some notes to explain myself lmao
YEAHHHHH: amir/barry is just so wholesome idk i just think it's cute even if just as friends?
A very good pairing! I can see it!: whether it's because they can match barry's freak or because they're characters close in vicinity/supportive/might need barry's support. cam is different in that i think cam has a special relationship with barry and mitchell re: expiring.
Cute, but might need context?: i think it'd be cute to see them together! i think they might need some context for why they're close but they would fit well!
Besties/Friends for sure, idk about romance: the vibes are there, i think, or they're objects that are relatively close to barry's day-to-day, though that's more clarence than dirk.
I don't know if Barry sees them much? might be friends?: i don't think barry interacts with them much, or if they're quite the right speed for him.
probably not a good idea imo: whether the character is too harsh/would not work well with barry's insecurity or... another reason... i don't think they'd be a good partner for barry. bathsheba is mean to barry in her route, for example - i do think that harper and barry were friends while chappy was alive, but his death made that fizzle out. "mbm, why is daisuke there" because that is MY man /jk /lh
i can't picture it bc they're so in love w someone else even if poly: gestures at them. but why not certain other pairs? washford/drysdale is a rocky relationship already, and them being broken up already feels like there's room for more. dasha and abel also just feel like they'd be more open with relationships. but celia/florence and eddie/volt? while i think barry would be an interesting third in both, i just can't picture it,
fuck i haven't met this character in game yet i'm a fraud: IM SO SORRY my hyperfixations are everywhere, i don't have the dlc, and i am constantly distracted by ffxiv, rf:goa, gosh i need to get back to da:v too send help i'm a de! disgrace
Thank you so much for the response, I really appreciate your input and I'm really grateful for the affirmations 💙
If you were at all curious, my identity is (funnily enough) the one part of myself I don't struggle with. I am very much asexual and my sexual attraction towards others still remains at a big, fat zero.
The problem for me lies more with my shifting thoughts and opinions in regards to intimacy. Up until recently, I was very much in the camp of "No sex or adjacent activities for me ever, please and thank you," and I was perfectly comfortable with that. Stuff like hugs and cuddles never bothered me (I borderline crave those), but anything more than that always made me recoil at the very thought.
But lately, I've unexpectedly found myself open to the idea of things that stray a little further towards more intimate territory. Not straight up sex, never that, but definitely things that are a bit more "heavy" than just hugs and cuddles.
It's not the worst thing in the world to feel, but honestly? It's kind of scary. I used to know what I wanted and now I'm back to being unsure again, and I hate not knowing things about myself (got the tism to thank for that one).
What's worse is how it may impact any future relationships I might have. The last thing I want is for someone I love to end up as collateral damage to me figuring out my own feelings. I know I don't owe anybody anything physical. Ever. But I still feel guilty at the thought of using someone explore my own desires whilst being potentially unable to fulfill theirs.
I realise this is quite a lot to just drop on someone, especially someone you just met, but this has been really preying on my mind lately, so thank you for listening to me ramble if nothing else, Barry. I really appreciate it. I'll just see myself out now.
If I ever get the nerve to come back, you can call me Star. Okay bye 👋
- ⭐️
(To MBM: Is this too heavy for a silly little Barry blog? (said affectionately) I profusely apologise, if so. Please feel free to ignore. Thank you)
Star, darling - don't you worry, alright? There's nothing wrong with the way you feel in the slightest. Of course - it can be scary, so don't you feel bad for that, either!
Sexuality is difficult! It's also often quite fluid, I am given to believe - there may come a time in your life where you embrace an entirely different identity, and that does not negate that which you put forth now! We autists especially often have difficulty understanding our own bodily needs - it is quite common, for instance, for human autists to not realize they're hungry until they're starving.
So don't you feel guilty, my dear. To be in a relationship is to be honest and communicate, first and foremost! You are not using anyone - not if they agree to help you explore! A partner might be excited to help you navigate your wants, you'd only be doing something wrong if they didn't give consent!
And if they did not want to try? That does not mean you do not have to try on your own! Perhaps you can explore avenues without involving others that they might support, or perhaps they would not mind you exploring it with other people, as well - but in the meantime, it is okay to be frightened of that uncertainty!
You are simply a wonderful human, just as you are. Know that you are loved, no matter how your feelings grow and change or stay the same over time - you are you, and that is plenty enough for me!
Seriously though dear, I don't mind heavier posts! Honestly, if people are going to give heavy posts to any ask blog, let it be one of mine - I am equipped to listen, and I do enjoy helping where I can, so whether Barry (or Lyric, or even Des) is my mouthpiece or the silly little bird MBM herself has words, I will always respond.
Sensual attraction and sexual attraction can be very different, after all! Goodness knows that if given the opportunity to bury my face in boobs I would - and there's very much a spectrum of where sensual drifts to sexual, and that depends entirely as what you define as sexual relations compared to other physical ones.
As someone who is always concerned about whether an allosexual (non-ace) person would be willing to date me, know that the best thing really is just that: communication. Talking about your wants and needs and how best to work together in a relationship sets a good standard for exploring those wants and needs later on.
There is nothing wrong with you for feeling guilty or scared, just know that you are valid for what you feel and how those feelings may change! I am always here for you, Barry or otherwise, if you need reassurance - especially as a fellow asexual autist. Just like Barry!
there’s a non-zero chance tumblr ate my ask, did you by any chance receive a veritable comedy of errors regarding gel polish within the last four days or so? I figured I’d wait a few days to ask in case the ask box was busy lol
ask box is never busy lol! i think it ate the ask at first bc i didn't see it when it was sent but then it started showing up, i've just been out the past couple days <3
