Remembering Mekrun
edit: the series im making is being reshuffled, and this will be a chapter in it, where previously it was standalone. It still works as a standalone piece without learning any of the characters or world building. If you have not read any of my other posts, Mekrun is Axel's dead grandfather. Axel used they/them.
Axel is 19 years old, but in development that's around 13 in our biology. If you don't know how ages work in my world, here's a reference. NOT needed to understand this.
Masterpost
Axel was studying their most recent painting. They'd started their tutoring with Ashnir only a few weeks ago, so it wasn't any kind of masterwork, but they were proud of it. It was only the fourth full size painting they'd done- full size meaning "big enough I have to spread my arms to hold it"- and it was clear seeing how far they'd come. Their first paining this size was on the wall right in front of them, and the difference was incredible- exactly as it had been the last two times, and exactly as Ashnir had said it would be.
The painting was of the southern beach, one of their favorite spots along the coast, which was perfect for practicing their art as they could add just as much or as little detail as they want and it still look mostly real. They'd gone for as much detail as possible, so you could see the waves breaking on the sand, but while they hadn't included everything- there were no sand dunes, for example- it was still recognizable as the beach. Unlike their second painting, which was of Calchoras' house, and was entirely unrecognizable as Calchoras' house. It was clearly someone's house, but whose was anyone's guess. The first painting Ashnir had chosen the subject for them- literally just his art studio- probably to avoid the mess he knew they were going to make when they were first given the choice, which was the second painting.
They'd learned the lesson; if you want to paint without enough skill for the subject to be detailed, don't get disappointed it won't work well. They had almost cried, actually, when they couldn't make the house recognizable, so Ashnir showed them the memory of his second painting- the memory and not the real thing, as it had been destroyed in the war- and they no longer had anything to be ashamed of.
It was still weird to be sharing memories with telepathy. Only three years ago, the best they could have done was concepts, a year ago the best they could have done was words. Sharing entire memories over thought was something they'd only learned to do a month ago, and despite how much they'd used it now, it still felt weird to be able to actually remember the time before the Fall. Not from their own perspective, but close enough.
They could see pictures of people who now they only knew as stars. Kripdun, Lapdin, little Milkon, all in the light that memory couldn't really capture. They'd seen inside the sun from grandpa's perspective, and knew what the Nuthri looked like. They had seen grandfather Mekrun and finally understood that dad really did look like him, but as they had that thought they could see the star everyone claimed to be him in the sky through their room's window. It was the second brightest star in the sky, and the second permanent one.
...A strange feeling possessed them. They didn't know what was happening. It was a deep and intense feeling of being watched, to the point that no amount of evidence could have convinced them someone was not looking at them right then and there, but it wasn't negative. It was more like having Ashnir watch them paint over their shoulder, or mom watching them learn to write better, or literally everyone on dad's side of the family watching them learn basic metalwork. It was the feeling of someone you can trust watching you, and being proud.
Their family had talked about the dead waking sometimes. Grandmom talked about one of the first things happening after her fathers death was feeling him watch her, before she even got the news he was dead. No one had described the feeling to them, and they didn't know if this was it. They couldn't be sure.
They stood up and went to their window, staring out at the stars they were just contemplating, to find one of them different. Mekrun was usually the second brightest star in the sky, second only to Nerquam, but right now his was the brightest. No one had told them that the star grew brighter when they woke, either.
But now they were sure.
They didn't know what to say. They were certain this wasn't the first time he'd watched them, not from what their family had said, but it was the first time they'd noticed. Maybe it was because they only recently grew memory telepathy? They can only sense it now that their telepathy has been strengthened? The feeling didn't have the sense of telepathy to it, though. It really was just like being watched.
They were stalling, and they knew it. They didn't have the words to say to the only member of their family they'd never met. They were contemplating just not saying anything, when the door opened on it's own.
Only one person in the entire palace would open any bedroom door without knocking, and sure enough, "Akel!" Leigha still had trouble with some words, which unfortunately included her siblings name. She was nine years old, making her just barely still a toddler, which Axel considered a crime. She was supposed to stay small forever! Why was she big enough she was hard to pick up, now? That's a crime.
Leigha went over and reached to be picked up anyways. Axel complied, but mostly just because they could stand her on the windowsill instead of hold her the entire time. "What are you still doing awake, little sis?"
"Mommy said five more mibutes!" she raised her arms over her head in celebration.
"And when did she say this?" Axel asked suspiciously. This was at least a full hour after they were supposed to be asleep, and Leigha needed much more sleep than they did.
"When I got out-a da bed and ased her if I can get up."
Axel laughed enough they nearly choked. Leigha got out of bed, woke mom up to ask, and she said "five more minutes" probably without even hearing Leigha ask anything at all.
So they'd be putting their sister back to bed in a bit. First though... five more minutes.
"Wha' were you doin'?"
Right, standing at the windowsill probably looked boring to a toddler. Or at least confusing.
"You can feel when someone whose a star is watching, you know?"
Leigha brightened at her learning being tested. "Yeah! Mommy and daddy and gramma told me."
"Well, I'm feeling it for the first time. I was looking at the stars to see who it is. It's grandfather."
"ohhhhhhh. Grandfater watch you, so you watch him?" She pointed at the sky as she said it, but kept looking at Axel.
"Heh. Yeah, that's why. Do you remember which star is his?" she gestured back to the window.
Leigha looked right in the right spot, then looked progressively more confused over the next few seconds. "Bu' I though' he was almost the brighes sar."
Axel ruffled her hair from behind. "Usually he is, but he's watching us right now, so he's the brightest."
"Oh."
A moment passed where they just started at the star, before Leigha waved, and said "Hi grandfater. I lo'fes you!"
Axel gaped, for a second. Neither of them had met their great grandfather. They knew he must have been nice, and wished they could have, but they hadn't. How could Leigha...?
Leigha interupted them. "Tha's what you do when someone watchin for you, righ'? You love em?"
...
"...Yeah, I guess you're right. Thanks, Leigha."
Leigha didn't know what she was being thanked for, but preened anyways.
They could feel the sensation of being watched begin to dissipate. The star was dimming. Still there, but he was going back to sleep.
"bye, grandfather... I love you."
Next time, I'll say it immediately. And I'll show him my art.
...He'll be proud.