Mar 18
Now I feel like an idiot.. I was like ... gonna send him photos and stuff cause I wanted all his attention
Not nudes but like .. photos of my outfit I thought was really cute :(
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Now I feel like an idiot.. I was like ... gonna send him photos and stuff cause I wanted all his attention
Not nudes but like .. photos of my outfit I thought was really cute :(
There's some asshole who's being fucking weird about 'system accountability' . Like , won't take it.
Just a hot take but if your alter does some crazy fucking shit, it doesn't matter if it wasn't you. Fucking apologize / take accountability. If the alter doesn't agree with your morals, APOLOGIZE as people following you most likely agree with your morals. Goddamn
Execute me atp cause who am I ???? Never before , not even in memories , have I ever felt this so ODD UGHHHH
Whoever said falling in love is the best feeling is a LYING , CANIVING BITCH CAUSE NO IT IS NOTTTTTT
Lowkey a small vent (under the cut , cw for emotional incest ig ?) (Ignore this if u want too)
I genuinely don't think I'm ever going to escape my parents . I'm too attached to them , especially my mom . I'm attached to my mom and I'm going to be in charge of her and her ashes when she dies . I'm in charge and I feel like I'm suppose to do this cause that's what a good kid does . Take care of their parents .
That's all I ever good for though . All I'm good for is the venting bag . I'm here for people to vent but I can't vent to others cause then I'm too much . I'm too vulnerable and they don't like it when their 'machine' becomes human. I'm something for people to vent to . I'm my mom's toy to use and vent at .
And they wonder why I used to be so self destructive . They really wonder why . No kid should have to hold their parents' problems as well as their own problems (which are caused by the parents aswell) .
I'm just tired ig . Ignore this lol
I don't know why but I feel like I'm not allowed to cry . I've already cried three times today .
I feel like I'm too emotionally draining towards others and that all I do is complain and complain over nothing . Boo hoo , there's worse out there . Maybe thats my parents' conditioning on me but I don't feel like my problems are worth others' time .
I'm good at trying to give advice , I'm good (very good) at listening . And I'm good at bottling everything up till it breaks open .
I don't know ... I just feel kinda . Lost now . I guess
Oh my fuck , my little brother is being so fucking bratty. Stfu , figure it out yourself. You're fucking 13, idgaf if you want help. I've spent every day helping you, I want to not do that cause you're about to be in HIGH SCHOOL. Jesus christ.
Sorry , he's just been an ass all damn day and I don't want to deal with him anymore. Love him, yeah but he's a pain in my ass.
Hey past me um .... how you feeling now ? Um ... don't flirt with that 7n7 alter . He's gonna go and groom you and all your friends . Ummmm
(A vent , tw for a mention of sa)
Lowkey hate going to places that my parents know are very traumatic for me ... and being forced to sleep in the same room 😭 you would think 'Oh , our child was sa'd in the bedroom they slept in . Lets let them pick out one of the other two rooms to be in' .. nope 💔 I'm in the same bed , same room , same sheets as when it happened and nothing has changed in the three years since we told them
We have been allowed to not talk with the person (for obvious reasons) but act surprised when I don't want to go ... let's think , guys ... why would an abuse victim not wish to go to the place they were abused in ??? Atleast at home , it all happened in the living room and guest room so I got my bedroom .