#mental stuff

[grace-hashomework]

is there a word for when you know you're not nonverbal, at least you think you aren't, but sometimes when it gets too hard, or you get overwhelmed, you just shut off?

i mean, i could force the words out if i really, really tried to, i guess. it'd just hurt, and probably make it worse.

i don't know. whenever i ask my friends they just say i'm either nonverbal or autistic, or poke fun at me for not being able to speak right. i dont think im autistic? i dont really know. i dont really know how to feel anymore.

[guraspooky]

"Will I always be your little girl?"

[mayayayayayaya]

looking at the pretty tumblrs when suddenly a post about hrt or hrt progress shows up and my little bubble of happiness is popped from within as i'm forced to confront and return to reality for the millionth time that day. i'm genuinely considering just blocking the hrt tag somehow (there's gotta be a way to do that on here, right) because it's such a consistent bummer every time i see it like GRRRRRRR STOP BEING HAPPY UNTIL I CAN BE HAPPY RAAAAAAA blah blah blah

i've lost a year of progress towards estradiol to so many family crises and so many deaths because there is literally never a point where my mom is in a stable enough mental place to be helping me with this and there hasn't been something else that needed to be taken care of and it's not faaaaairrrruh. tch. stupid trauma...

[chypchup]

you may have noticed I deleted a few things

requests + commissions open

[clusterb-critical]

Just a reminder that it is okay if you’re uncomfortable around people with a cluster b pd. And it’s okay if you avoid them.

But it is not okay to actively hate, harass, and threaten them.

[dissociacrip]

developmental disability would be a lot easier to deal with if it didn't involve getting easily overwhelmed & crying because you don't understand "simple" things like other people do

[vampirelesbianmermaid]

I'm remembering when I was in one of my "I am literally Nina in real life" episodes . I bought two different kinds of purple sweater + red stripey leggings so I could look as close as possible. It is fun and awesome but I'm not sure what causes it bc sometimes I feel like her and sometimes I don't

[fauxfickle]

Afton's Notes, 1983 - 1987

I've been looking back at a bunch of EATEOT projects from a few years ago and felt inspired by the various stages of mental decay.

A slow, grueling descent into broken, unthinking, almost animalistic behavior. And then only to be poked and provoked by the man who took away everything from you, to be left in the shell of a frumpy, rigid animatronic. Not very rad