George Michael: The Middle Eight Champion of the World
As Wham kicked off 2021 at the top of the UK single charts, I’ve been thinking about why I love George Michael and his music so much. I also, more importantly, thought of a pun I was really proud of and felt compelled to share.
We all know this time of year is famous for a few things. You’ve experienced your Christmas and your Hootenanny, you may now, for some reason, be experiencing a dry January, but for me it’ll always be George Season™.
This is partly due to the fact he passed away on Christmas Day, just hours before my birthday on 26th December, which at the time felt like a sign of some sort. But, it was mostly just upsetting for me and my mum to be honest. Following the sad news, as soon as I got back to London in January 2017, I did the unhinged thing that fans do and visited his Highgate shrine, created around his house and black Range Rover. All these memories make listening to his tunes at this time of year all the more poignant than usual.
Another reason these freezing months will always be George Season™ is Last Christmas, not the Oscar worthy film, but the song that got him boom-booing to Number 1 with Wham in 2021. The snowy video with the love triangle, iconic skiwear and a look to camera that’s now a gif, has been played on YouTube in fancy 4k over 600 million times. Add in the amount of streams and there has been over a billion listens to this 80s classic. Wowzers indeed. Oh and this time of year is when my loved ones and I traditionally head to west London to witness the best tribute act in the world, Rob Lamberti and his ‘George Michael: Relived’ show.
[Rob Lamberti and friend pictured in 2016]
I decided to conduct some forensic analysis as to why his classics just hit differently to the others for me. After mass testing and plenty of chin scratching I came to the conclusion that my love for his music is because of the unique way he (George, not Rob Lamberti) writes his songs. More specifically though, the way George writes memorable, incredible or what’s now known as ‘top tier’ middle-8s. You know, what Bob Dylan or Paul McCartney might describe as ‘the bit of the song before the last chorus that is not the verse’. The BBC official songwriting guide defines the middle-8 as: “A new chord sequence and melody, maybe a big change in the arrangement of the song, or even an instrumental solo.”
Ray Davies, the songwriting legend of the Kinks, charmingly said: “If after two weeks you still can’t write your middle-8, the best course of action is to see a psychiatrist”. Now it may take two weeks to work out what he meant by that, but basically we are talking about the part of a song George Michael absolutely nailed.
The first hit that sparked this niche search (and justified my pun) was Fastlove, “In the absence of security, I made my way into the night / Stupid Cupid keeps on calling me / And I see lovin' in his eyes / I miss my baby, oh yeah’. Decent isn't it. Anyone reading this would have wailed those words in perfect harmony, perhaps in a living room, an ‘afters’ venue or maybe in a past life - even a nightclub. After that part of his 90s boogie-banger you may choose to complete the section, at the peak of a kitchen disco with, “I do believe that we are practicing the same religion. Thats right.”
When I found that he actually did pen more than a few iconic middle-8, I dived into his huge discography to see if there were more and thank the bass of Andrew Ridgeley there was. Naturally its only right to pull out these iconic moments and pop them in an a list isn't it? Also, I really have been sat on this pun forever and I need to validate it with something.
Now, please enjoy this list (complete with links) of the ex-Wham man’s most iconic middle-8s. Or as he may now forever be known, George Michael, The Middle-Eight Champion of the World. Sorry.
The List (and the iconic bit I have been going on about):
◦ Fastlove ‘That’s Right.’
◦ Careless Whisper - ‘Tonight the music feels so loud I wish that we could lose this crowd’
◦ Last Christmas - ‘A face on a lover with a fire in his heart. A man under cover but you tore him apart.’
◦ Freedom 90’ - ‘Feels like the road to heaven, feels like the road to hell.’
◦ Everything She Wants - ‘My situation never changes.’
◦ Flawless (Go To The City) - ‘Sometimes it brings you down, sometimes it keeps you up. Doesn’t it doesn’t it make you feel better. Better. Better.’
◦ Club Tropicana -’Pack your bags and leave tonight”
◦ Spinning the Wheel - ‘How can you love me, you are playing with my life. You said ‘give me time and I’ll be better I swear.’
