I need to plot on this one a little bit more, and this is pure Draft Zero nonsense that sets up the fairly light tone of the story itself, but... I’m actually writing again? That’s good...?
Though I think maybe I’m gonna look at one of my other WiP stories and see if I can move a little bit more on that. In the meantime... here, have a Douglas Adams inspired intro that looks at the problem of the Triforce.
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The story so far:
In the beginning, the Triforce was created. This has made a lot of people angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.
Many races in Hyrule believe it was created by the goddess Hylia in time immemorial, though this is by no means a consensus. While they are seen as crude and animalistic by many, the bokoblins have a complex faith. They believe the Great Creator Otom Ayim has created and recreated Hyrule numerous times, and the lives of all its inhabitants follow a series of rigid, preset patterns for the entertainment of beings who inhabit another, ineffable plain of existence.
As such, they believe the Triforce was created as a cruel cosmic joke, an omnipotent MacGuffin to make the otherwise dull daily life of Hyrule entertaining to the invisible masses. The handful of scholars who have translated bokoblin runes think this belief is a load of Molduga's kidneys. The bokoblins, for their part, cite this ultimate futility as the reasons they fall in line with Ganon again and again.
(You might wonder if moblins have a similar faith. They do not. They are just assholes.)
The Church of Hylia is quick to assert that the Triforce exists in accordance with Her Divine Plan, though they are notoriously silent as to what this plan is or why it seems to often involve the revival of Ganondorf and the routine subjugation of the people of Hyrule. Everything that happens, they assure the masses, is the will of Hylia. The routine abuse of the Triforce's nigh omnipotent power happens by Her design.
Unbeknownst to even the High Priests, not a word of this is true. Hylia, exhausted by the demands and criticism of the people of Hyrule, finally snapped and created the Triforce with the divine words of, “You think you can do better? Give it a try!”
Some time later (after a few self actualization classes, a few breathing techniques and a handful of appointments with the God of Therapy), Hylia saw this didn't help matters. But by then, the Triforce had become sentient and resented the notion of being destroyed. The goddess and her creation finally came to an agreement. The Trifoce would live on, albeit separated into three component pieces.
And so, the Triforces of Wisdom, Courage and Power were created. In theory, the three would remain separate and, in so doing, preserve the land and people of Hyrule. In practice, people are still people and no one just forgets divine power. The end results is that the three Triforce siblings often have family reunions with terrible wars instead of awkward family photos.
It has been this way for millennia. Yet in the Age of Calamity, the Triforce was notably absent. Unknown to even those who trained her, Princess Zelda's golden power was in fact the Triforce of Wisdom.
Which begs the question, what became of the other two?
Though they don't know it at the time, a knight of Hyrule and a princess of the Zora are about to find the answer.
