#bllk x reader

[reomikagekin]

Hey so.. I know it's been awhile..

I keep coming back and disappearing I'm so sorry💔

Ill continue my smaus I promise. That one gen smau request. I haven't forgotten.

Also I should do blue lock smaus too😛😛😛 #pleasegivemeideas 😛😛😛

[mimimell]

Quick little poll!!!

Context: Kunigiri and Nagireo week are very close together this year! Nagireo week coming after Kunigiri week.

If I do kunigiri week, I risk getting too burnt out for nagireo week...... so do I do it? I'll put the prompts for both weeks down below.

do I participate in kunigiri week? (Aug 1-7)

do it!

don't do it!

Remaining time: 22 hours 4 minutes

[numberonefangirlofrin]

can you do itoshi sister who was ignored by both her brothers after the u-20 japan vs bllk match then isagi comfort her

Sure!

Itoshi Sister x Isagi

You always thought you understood your brothers. Sae chased soccer and Rin chased Sae. Somewhere between those two things you disappeared completely.

The U20 match was over. Everyone was celebrating except the things were different at itoshi household.

You stared at your phone for what felt like the hundredth time.

Sae – Last message sent 7:42 PM.

Read.

No reply.

Another message.

"Are you okay?"

Read.

Nothing.

Meanwhile Rin at home has isolated himself in his room. Ever since the match ended, it felt like he'd built another wall. He'd lost. Not the match but his chance to beat Sae. You knew how much that meant to him.

The apartment was painfully quiet. Usually he would be drinking water in the kitchen after training or silently eating whatever you made. Sometimes he'd complain.

"It's cold."

"It's too salty."

Yet he'd always finish the plate, but now he wouldn't even look at you. By evening you couldn't take it anymore, everything felt so quiet that you decided to go out for a walk. You kept replaying the match. Rin's face after the final whistle. The way Sae walked away. The way neither of them had looked for you afterward.

"...You?"

Blue eyes widened in surprise.

"Yoichi?"

He slowed to a stop.

"I thought it was you."

You forced a smile.

"...Hi."

He studied your face for only a second before his expression softened.

"...Want to walk together?"

Neither of you spoke at first however the silence was not awkward as it was home.

Eventually Isagi spoke.

"…You're worried about them."

"...is it that obvious?"

"A little."

"...Sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?"

You looked down.

"I feel like I'm making this about me. I should just let them be...but they won't even look at me anymore."

Isagi stopped walking. You did too.

"I know Rin. He pushes everything away even things he actually cares about."

"...You really think he still cares?"

"Of course, he does. If he see me here with his dear little sister he will kill me right here.

A tiny laugh escaped him.

"Honestly, I don't think he knows how to deal with emotions in general."

Despite yourself you smiled.

He reached for your hand very carefully, like he was asking permission. When you didn't pull away his fingers intertwined with yours.

"If they won't talk yet I can listen."

Something in your chest finally gave out. You'd spent all day pretending you were okay. Pretending you understood. The first tear slipped out before you could stop it you barely had time to wipe it away before Isagi opened his arms. Waiting like it was your choice.

You stepped forward. The moment your forehead rested against his shoulder everything came out. His arms wrapped around you carefully. One hand rested between your shoulder blades the other stroked your hair.

You tightened your grip on his shirt.

"What about Sae?"

Isagi smiled sadly.

"He's harder to understand."

"But..."

He looked down at you.

"I don't think either of your brothers realizes how lucky they are."

Your face warmed.

"...Don't say things like that."

"Why?"

"You'll make me cry again."

He laughed softly.

"Then I'll just have to keep comforting you."

For the first time that day your smile reached your eyes.

"...You're unfairly nice."

The two of you continued walking side by side. This time your hands never separated.

When a cool breeze made you shiver, he slipped his jacket over your shoulders without saying a word.

At one point, you looked at him and quietly thanked him.

Instead of answering, Isagi leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead.

When he pulled back, his cheeks were red.

"I just..."

"...wanted you to know you're not alone."

[hadijjj]

Magic spell of love friendship and kindness!!!!

Or who could believe that Ness was the best brat tamer?

word count: 1,1k

tags: fem! reader, p in v sex, Ness's dom (and I will die on that hill), brat taming, a bit of degradation, teasing, sex in front of a camera, Kaiser mentioned

Dear Kaiser, 

I am writinh to sincerwly apologkze for my... 

“You made three mistakes in the first sentence,” Ness hissed in your ear, sharp whisper of moist lips scorched your ear, put your whole body in flames. “Are you that stupid you don’t know how to write an email? Or just not motivated?” 

Sounds of the keyboard clicking lost its usual hurried tempo upon your trembling hands hovering over the keys, occasionally hitting the buttons as if you were typing for the first time. Each clank faded in your heavy stuttering sighs, sighs and whimpers you couldn’t hold when your pussy painfully clenched around nothing. 

“P-please, I c-can't...” you mustered up the last bits of consciousness for a pathetic mumble, shamelessly bent over the hard wooden desk, figure clad in only underwear and some top Ness didn’t bother to take off: he had only pulled your soaking panties to the side to slide his cock against your puffy folds. A little distraction added up. 

“Oh, you can, you were so cocky and capable when you were bratting out like that,” he fondled with the plush of your hips, keeping you in place, not giving you a mercy to move an inch or let you grind on his shaft, covered in precum and your slick––how could someone so sweet looking be so cruel?! 

As much as others, you considered him Michael’s lapdog: barking and biting for his friend you barely held any respect. As expected, your own ego couldn’t ignore this behaviour! Clash after clash, Alexis’s patience was wearing thin; no more backhanded comments, no more attempts to include himself in the arguments.  

The day when he directly walked over to you, invaded your personal space, leaned so close to spit the last warning in your face in that hushed tone, only reinforced by this mysterious and dizzyingly sweet cologne. You finally tasted the fruits of your labour. 

“F-fuck,” you breathed out, bucking your hips involuntarily in meek attempts, while trembling cursor navigated to autocorrect the underlined words, sensitive clit subtly grazing the mushroom tip, and it drove you insane 

“Language,” his grip on your hips tightened, restraining you from pleasure, as his focus diverted to the bright screen again. “You forgot the comma before the and.” 

Who cares about these commas anyway?! 

You pathetically shuddered under him, first whines and sniffles spilt out of your mouth like nothing, and it didn’t shake his resolve––only stiffened the dick between your foldsand heaved the breathing in your ear.  

He liked that till the last click, didn’t he? 

Till the click on the “send” button, when he put his hand over yours, which rested on the mouse, lead it to the certain app you didn’t comprehend behind the blurred edges of your vision; though, what you did understand was your faces on the screen, dimly lit by the bright monitor, and the recording light flicking in the corner. 

“You’re desperate like that, aren't you?” Alexis tilted your head for a better camera angle, making sure you could see the glassy eyes, the mussed hair, the pathetic face expression, and the way you nodded so eagerly. “Say you’re sorry.” 

“I-I’m sorry, sorry, sorry!” 

Suddenly, your leg was placed on the desk, the knee hit the wooden surface, so it made you naturally spread for him. More access, more touch you were so depraved of. The hand from your face crept under your torso, arm wrapped around your waist yanked you up and tore your upper body from the table. 

Now the whole view of the camera was your soaked panties, an outline of his tip behind the flimsy wet fabric that rested right on your clit, snuggly pressed and nested against the bullied bundle of nerves, and veiny hands on your body occasionally diving under the fabric, playing with a hem in torturous teasing. 

“Look how desperate,” muted sound of the recording, panties tugged to the side to present the leaking pussy. “You want me to fuck you, don’t you?” 

He was entranced by the sight, the way your slick glistened in the dim light on the screen and how your folds and the pretty button––much more enticing than the “send” one, Ness secretly admitted to himself––got puffier under it. It should burn to feel that hot, shouldn’t it? 

His cock moved, finally, positioned at your inviting entrance; while his knuckles grazed your pussy. Gentle caress that made you shudder, along with the way his tip pressed against your hole and pulled away. 

“Y-yess, Lexis, please,” you whimpered, nails dug in his tensed arms, as his other hand fondled with a hardened nipple under your top. 

“Why do you think you deserve it?”  

Not much of an answer could you dumbed out brain come up with...  

“Nothing to say, huh?” Alexis repeated his torturous teasing, push and pull. “Or you finally understood that you were wrong?” 

“Y-yes” 

He smirked, pressing his tip against the entrance again. 

“Being humble suits you so well.” 

And he slid in, tugging at the underwear to put on a magic show in front of the camera, making you moan at the delicious stretch. The way your slick gummy walls enveloped and clenched around him, as it knocked you off breath. 

“See? Having good manners isn’t so difficult,” Ness started to move, making you melt in his body with each thrust, each hit on that certain spot. “Better see you that compliant in front of Kaiser tomorrow, okay?” 

“O-okay,” you answered with unfamiliar obedience––that dick wrecked you, for sure.  

And it took not so long until your wobbly legs started shaking, your knee accidentally hit the desk again, and you felt something inside was about to break, and it wasn’t only your mind.  

Panting like a dog in heat, you threw your head on his shoulder, biting your lip; and through that dazed gaze you could make out his features. 

“Already close? What a needy girl,” He didn’t even need any answer to pull your writhing figure closer, rub on your neglected clit. And he couldn’t help but chuckle when you blurted out “thank you” mid blabbering. Looking so proud and content at his work––you coming undone and mewling in his arms––as if there wasn’t any animosity in the first place. 

With a final thrust he buried himself to the hilt, shooting hot ropes of cum until your pussy was dripping, grunting and fluttering his lashes, while you went limp against him. 

“You’re actually so cute when you behave,” he pressed a peck on your temple before turning off the recording, sincere smile crept up his cheeks. 

That magic wand put some crazy spells on you. 

AAAURGHUGH I LOVE THAT GUY

[meihuasu]

Yo Que Dependo de Tí

Yandere! Bunny Iglesias x Reader - Masterlist

Your adopted son has always been the clingy type, though maybe it isn't out of innocent affection but something else that has been festering since the very start - a series of miscellaneous moments with your son, Bunny

Note: Pseudocest, so much pseudocest

Y Si Me Quedas Tú

Your son's a good kid, he's just worried about the intentions of others, you never know what other people might be thinking!

De Los Caprichos de Tu Corazón

Despite all your years in Barcelona, you've yet to pick up Catalan. After a long week at work and a particularly exhilarating match, your son wakes up awfully intent on showing off his clear mastery over the language.

[TBD]

[meihuasu]

De Los Caprichos de Tu Corazón

Yandere! Bunny Iglesias x Reader

Despite all your years in Barcelona, you've yet to pick up Catalan. After a long week at work and a particularly exhilarating match, your son wakes up awfully intent on showing off his clear mastery over the language.

Note: implied noncon, implied somnophilia, pseudocest, Bunny calls reader mama, Bunny speaks catalan

Masterlist

//had a crazy realistic dream with godwin from the u20 nigerian team while writing this, woke up feeling like i lost my wife

Thin panes of sunlight filter through the lacy curtains of your bedroom, your nextdoor neighbour is drying their clothes— yelling at their husband to bring over the basket, and the gentle scent of dried lemons waft through your home.

Stretching your sleep-sore form, your legs push against your thin blanket as a soft noise of satisfaction falls from your lips. You're a bit more achy today, your hip joints throbbing with a dull ache. Between your legs, a slick seems to have soaked through your panties, your thighs coated in a sticky sheen.

Blearily, you roll over to reach out for your phone, lighting up with a selfie of your son miserably standing atop the roof of La Pedrera and a 09.03 across your dim screen. You don't even remember when you fell asleep last night, just that you had managed to get out of your clothes before crashing onto the bed, your mind nothing but a haze of tangled sheets and cool night wind. Its honestly nothing out of the ordinary for someone of your occupation, in fact you're more impressed you weren't waking up in the middle of the night again, and it isn't long before sleep threatens to take you away once more.

Rolling back, before you can fully return to slumber, an arm reaches over to bring you into a warm embrace. Through your groggy senses, you find your son watching over you.

Though still sleepy, you reach out to smooth down his hair. "Good morning, cariño."

He says nothing, merely preening under your touch. Blinking between sleep, you feel your breathing even out as your eyelids grow heavier and heavier. Before you can fully doze off, your skin pricks up as he pulls the sheets off of the both of you, curling himself up as he rests his head on your chest.

Tangling your legs with his, your son wraps himself around you. Bunny noses along the dip of where your collarbones meet, his lips brush against the warm skin of your chest. Between your two forms, a thin layer of sweat already starts to build, skin sticking to scarred skin.

"Its too hot," You murmur, weakly trying to push him away from you to no avail. "Cariño, come on."

He ignores your wriggling, pinning you down to the bed as he pulls you into a tighter embrace. A soft noise akin to a whine leaves his lips, and in his displeasure, he leaves a playful nip on your collarbone, his teeth easily sinking into the skin.

A sharp hiss falls out, and yet you don't push him away, merely smacking his back. Despite this, he continues in his disobedient clinging. With a helpless smile playing on your lips, you sigh, "When did you come in? I thought you'd have knocked out after last night's match."

"The upstairs neighbours were being noisy again," With an aggrieved tinge to his coarse voice, Bunny fixes you with those large eyes of his, a sense of distress reflected in the deep red.

Your features scrunch together, wondering how you managed to sleep through it. "Well, you know how they are."

Resting his head back onto your chest, he murmurs against your tender skin as a hand plays with the hem of your pyjama shirt, an old jersey of his, "Mama, you should move in with me. Don't you always complain about how much you're awoken by them?"

"We've talked about this before, my answer isn't going to change." You run a hand through his hair, gently combing through the soft strands as his expression drops ever so slightly. Your heart has always been too weak for him, and you sigh, "Now now, I know you're just worried. How about we go talk to them later, okay?"

"Well, I guess it'll mostly be you, Mrs. Vidal and I tried last time around and I was practically useless."

At the mention of this, your son laughs, the sound from his chest resonating along your form, "Mhm, Catalan?"

"Luckily you're here, huh?" With an amused coo, you pat his head.

His eyes crinkle together, the corners of his lips curl as he hums, "Of course, what kind of son would I be if I can't even take care of you?"

You can't help the all too fond breath that leaves your lips, nor the chaste kiss on the top of his head that you leave.

As sunlight continues to filter through your curtains, eventually the distant Catalan you've been hearing from your nextdoor neighbour whittles away to mere whispers. You blink between sleep and wakefulness, absentmindedly petting your son's hair while he rests. Yet with the slight morning chill being replaced by the heat of the summer sun, the thin sheen of sweat amidst your tangled limbs has since become more than unbearable.

All you can muster is a strangled groan, your hand moves down to pat his back. He obliges, and without another word, lets you off the bed only to follow right after, pinching the edge of your shirt as he does. Adjusting the collar of the old jersey draped over you, you drag you and your son towards the open bathroom, hands squeezing out toothpaste as he stares at you through the mirror.

There's a creak in your hips still, a haziness lingering in your head that you can't quite shake off. Despite that all, you try your best to respond to Bunny's murmured musings.

"Et veus tan bonica amb la meva roba, hauries de continuar fent-la servir."His eyes lower to the toothbrush in your mouth, voice soft in your ears, ""Tant de bo tothom d'ahir a la nit et pogués veure així, potser així finalment deixarien de molestar-te.""

Spitting out your toothpaste, you helplessly smile, "You know I won't know what you want if I can't understand you."

He merely continues to watch you, his fingers easily slipping past the long hem of your shirt. The feeling of his large hands on your already sore waist pulls a muffled noise from your lips, and yet you pay his touchiness no mind, continuing to go about your morning routine. Without warning, he pulls you flush against his form, your hips now pressed to his.

"Espero que et trobis millor, et veies molt cansada aquests darrers dies."

"Hm? You hope what? You've been drinking enough water and taking breaks, right?" Your brows knit together, and you meet his intense gaze through the mirror. Upon hearing your concern, your son nods, that gentle smile still present.

He hums, thumbs rubbing slow circles into your hips, "Mhm, don't worry."

Though unconvinced, you don't pursue it any further.

"El teu conillet només t'estava cuidant. Em perdonaràs, oi?" Mirth tinges his words as he lowers his head, the fine hairs along your neck prick up as the feeling of intimate presence, at the warmth of his breath.

You can't quite tell what he's asking of you, you can only assume he did something silly again to be asking for your forgiveness like this. Before you can respond, in one swift motion, he leaves a quick kiss to the corner of your lips, the feeling of his lips lingering a beat too long. "Em vaig assegurar que et sentís bé, mai et podria deixar insatisfet."

You push his head away as you huff, earning you a giggle that softens your already weak heart. "Ay, brush your teeth first. You can kiss your future partner with your morning breath."

"Can't I kiss you too?" Murmuring, you're trapped between the sink and his tall form as a small breath of laughter infects your ears. "I'm just showing my mama the love she deserves."

You reach up to cup his face in your hand, affectionately patting his soft cheek. True to his words, he plants another kiss to your palm. You can only amusedly smile, "Well, your mama wants you to brush your teeth and to get ready for the day."

Clearly, this is the one thing that he doesn't want to do. And just like an unruly child, Bunny responds by burying his face into the crook of your neck, firmly refusing to peel himself off of you. He wraps his arms around you, the smell of your own bed on his skin.

No matter what you do, flicking water at him, attempting to move to the side, telling him you need to use the toilet, he doesn't budge.

"I'm very proud of you, you know that right?" A helpless breath leaves you, and yet you still reach to press a fleeting kiss to his hair. Finally, as you laugh, only then does he react, the warm sensation of his lips on your tender skin, "I love you."

"Ets el que més cuido en aquest món, mama."

Your ears warm, though you don't know what he said, you can't help but feel that maybe, its a perfect response.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

translation notes:

[i dont speak catalan and i used a translator for all this, there may be some mistakes]

"You're so cute in my clothes, you should just keep wearing them."

"I wish everyone from last night could see you like this, maybe then they'd finally stop bothering you."

"I hope you're feeling better, you looked so tired these past few days."

"You'll forgive me, right? Your bunny was just taking care of you."

"I made sure you felt good, I could never leave you dissatisfied."

"You are what I cherish most in this world, mama."

[sevarchive]

˚₊‧꒰ა MAY THE GOALS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR

summary . . ৎ → in which BLUE LOCK PLAYERS are pulled into another kahoot game but with a twist! a few unexpected football prodigies from germany, france, and ... spain join the lobby!

જ⁀➴ content: kahoot au :: crackfic :: profanity :: no footballs were kicked during the making of this fic :: everyone is yelling

→ ISAGI STARTED THE CALL

→ RIN JOINED THE CALL

→ SHIDOU JOINED THE CALL

→ BACHIRA JOINED THE CALL

→ REO JOINED THE CALL

→ CHIGIRI JOINED THE CALL

→ BAROU JOINED THE CALL

→ GAGAMARU JOINED THE CALL

Bachira: SO WHEN ARE THEY JOINING???

Shidou: I'VE BEEN REFRESHING THE MEMBER LIST FOR LIKE A MINUTE 😭

Reo: Isagi, don't tell me you were lying about the guests.

Isagi: I literally invited them.

Barou: Tch. Hurry up.

Chigiri: You're more impatient than everyone else.

Barou: I just want to start.

Bachira: NAHHH I'M TRYNA SEE IF THEY'RE ACTUALLY GONNA SHOW UP.

Gagamaru: Do we know who's joining?

Isagi: You'll find out.

Reo: Watch nobody joins.

Bachira: DON'T SAY THAT—

→ LOKI JOINED THE CALL

Bachira: WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT

Reo: no fucking way 😭

Bachira: IS THAT ACTUALLY LOKI??

Loki: hello.

Shidou: LMFAO BRO SPAWNED IN LIKE IT'S FIRST PERIOD ATTENDANCE

Bachira: HELLO?????????

Reo: THAT'S ALL WE GET????

Loki: ...what?

Reo: idk man i expected fireworks

Bachira: OR A FRENCH SPEECH

Shidou: OR AT LEAST "what's up losers"

Loki: why would i say that

Shidou: BC ITS COOL????

Loki: no.

Reo: wow.

Bachira: he's actually like this LMAOOOO

Isagi: thanks for joining though

Loki: you said there'd be a football quiz. i figured i'd come embarrass everyone.

Bachira: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Chigiri: THE CONFIDENCE???

Barou: tch.

Bachira: WAIT HOLD ON—WHY IS THE FASTEST PLAYER IN THE WORLD HERE FOR A QUIZ 😭😭

Barou: WHAT DOES RUNNING FAST HAVE TO DO WITH ANSWERING QUESTIONS YOU IDIOT

Bachira: IDK MAN MAYBE HE'LL REACH THE ANSWER FASTER???

Reo: THAT IS NOT HOW QUIZZES WORK

Loki: it isn't..being smarter than barou probably helps though.

Shidou: OHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Barou: SAY THAT AGAIN.

Loki: no need. you heard me the first time.

Bachira: NAHHHHHHH 😭😭😭

Reo: BAROU DON'T CRASH OUT YET WE HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED

Barou: WE'LL SEE WHO'S SMARTER.

Bachira: nahhhhh he kinda cooked you king

Barou: shut up before i mute you.

Bachira: YOU CAN'T MUTE ME YOU’RE NOT EVEN THE HOST LMAOOOOOO

→ HUGO JOINED THE CALL

Reo: WAIT HUGO'S HERE

Bachira: HUGOOOOO

Hugo: ...so this is the "casual Kahoot."

Isagi: ...yeah?

Hugo: Interesting definition of "casual."

Bachira: WE HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED YELLING YET 😭

Barou: DON'T ENCOURAGE THEM.

Shidou: TOO LATE I'VE BEEN SCREAMING THIS WHOLE TIME

Hugo: I can tell. Is it too late to leave?

Rin: yes.

Hugo: Loki, please tell me you're not actually taking this seriously.

Loki: I am. Why else would I join?

Hugo: ...It's a Kahoot.

Loki: Exactly.

Reo: nobody in this call is beating the unemployment allegations 😭

Barou: Says the guy checking crypto every five minutes.

Reo: HELLO????

Shidou: GET HIS ASS BAROU LMAOOOO

Bachira: WAIT WHY ARE WE BULLYING REO NOW 😭

Barou: Because he's annoying.

Reo: WHAT DID I EVEN DO??

Rin: Exist.

Reo: ??????

Bachira: RIN IS LITERALLY HATING JUST TO HATE NOW 😭

Isagi: You didn't even hesitate.

Rin: Didn't need to.

Hugo: I've been here for less than a minute and this is already worse than I expected.

Loki: Tell me about it...

→ CHARLES JOINED THE CALL

Shidou: CHARLES!!!

Charles: SHIDOUUUUU

Shidou: YOU ACTUALLY CAME LMAOOO

Charles: You invited me. I had to see this disaster for myself.

Shidou: THAT'S MY GOAT

Charles: I'm not even here to win.

Reo: ...oh?

Charles: I'm here to ragebait.

Bachira: OH I LIKE HIM ALREADY 😭

Charles: Wait...

Charles: Loki's here??

Loki: Unfortunately.

Charles: HUGO TOO???

Hugo: Somehow, yes.

Reo: We have Loki, Hugo, and Charles in one VC.

Shidou: ALRIGHT FRANCE VS JAPAN RIGHT NOW

Charles: Winner gets the Kahoot.

Isagi: ...that's literally not how Kahoot works.

Gagamaru: Wait, do I have to? I'm kinda eating chips.

Shidou: THE NATION NEEDS YOU.

Gagamaru: Can the nation wait like ten minutes?

Charles: NOOOO

Gagamaru: Damn.

Loki: France is ready.

Gagamaru: SEE?? THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT 😭 WHY IS HE ACTUALLY LOCKED IN

Bachira: gagamaru is somehow the most normal person in this call

Gagamaru: I just wanted to answer Kahoot questions, man.

→ NESS JOINED THE CALL

Ness: Good evening, everyone.

Reo: Hold on... you're from Bastard München.

Bachira: A BASTARD MÜNCHEN PLAYER ACTUALLY JOINED???

Shidou: Ohhhhhhhh.

Chigiri: If Ness is here then...

Reo: Don't say it.

Ness: Oh. Kaiser is joining too.

Reo: ...excuse me???

Barou: Tch.

Charles: NO WAY LMAOOO

Loki: This just became more interesting.

Isagi: Ness.

Ness: Yes?

Isagi: Why would you spoil that?

Ness: Spoil what?

Isagi: Kaiser joining.

Ness: ...Was I not supposed to say that?

Isagi: NO??

Barou: What kind of guest list is this?

Ness: I assumed everyone would appreciate the announcement.

Reo: THAT'S THE CRAZIEST PART 😭

Bachira: BRO REALLY THOUGHT WE'D ALL CHEER LMAOOOO

Ness: I mean... why wouldn't you?

→ KAISER JOINED THE CALL

Kaiser: Why is it so quiet?

Bachira: OH MY GOD.

Reo: HE'S ACTUALLY HERE 😭

Shidou: THE FINAL BOSS HAS ARRIVED

Kaiser: "Final boss." That's embarrassing.

Charles: LMAOOOO I KNEW HE'D HATE THAT

Isagi: Glad you could make it.

Kaiser: Are you?

Isagi: ...

Kaiser: You sound exhausted.

Isagi: I've been trying to manage this call for the last ten minutes...

Kaiser: Skill issue.

Bachira: OHHHHHHHH 😭

Reo: HE DIDN'T EVEN LET HIM BREATHE

Rin: Straight to it.

Ness: Kaiser!

Kaiser: Hello, Ness.

Ness: I told everyone you were joining.

Kaiser: Why?

Ness: I thought they'd be excited.

Kaiser: That was your first mistake.

Reo: 😭😭😭

Charles: HE DOESN'T EVEN GAS UP HIS OWN TEAMMATE

Bachira: NESS JUST TOOK THAT LMFAOOOO

Ness: It's fine. I should've expected that from Kaiser.

Kaiser: So this is the quiz?

Isagi: Yeah.

Kaiser: And you needed... this many people?

Isagi: It's supposed to be fun.

Kaiser: So no real reason.

Bachira: STOP COOKING THE HOST 😭

Isagi: Anyway... we're still waiting on one more guest.

Charles: WAIT THERE'S ANOTHER ONE???

Bachira: I FORGOT ABOUT THAT

Hugo: There are more?

Loki: Unfortunately.

Isagi: Anyone wanna guess who it is?

Rin: No.

Isagi: You'll be happy when they join.

Rin: ...Why did you say it like that?

Bachira: uh oh.

Reo: WAIT...

Shidou: OH THERE'S ONLY ONE PERSON THAT'D PISS RIN OFF THIS FAST LMAOOOO

→ SAE JOINED THE CALL

Shidou: SAE-CHANNNNNN!!!

Sae: Hmph.

Shidou: YOU ACTUALLY CAME LMAOOO

Rin: Kill me now.

Bachira: HE'S ALREADY MAD 😭

Reo: WE HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED THE QUIZ

Charles: New speedrun record.

Isagi: Glad you could make it.

Sae: You said there'd be football.

Isagi: There will be.

Sae: Good.

Rin: Can everyone stop acting like this is some huge event?

Sae: Sorry, Rin. Next time I'll decline.

Rin: That's not—

Sae: You're right. You'd complain either way.

Bachira: LMFAOOOOOO HE'S GETTING COOKED 😭

Rin: Nobody is getting cooked.

Shidou: BRO'S IN STAGE 1: DENIAL

Charles: Stage 2 loading...

Rin: There are no stages.

Sae: Stage 2.

Bachira: NO WAY HE JOINED IN 😭😭😭

Reo: SAE ACTUALLY COMMITTED TO THE BIT

Shidou: THAT'S MY GOAT

Rin: I hate all of you.

Charles: Stage 2 confirmed.

Bachira: STAGE 2 CONFIRMED

Reo: STAGE 2 CONFIRMED

Shidou: STAGE 2 CONFIRMED

Rin: CAN YOU ALL STOP REPEATING EVERYTHING?? I'M GOING TO MUTE EVERYONE.

Sae: Stage 3.

Bachira: IM CRYINGGGGGGGGG

Charles: PEAK ENTERTAINMENT

Shidou: HE DOESN'T EVEN HAVE TO TRY 😭

Rin: I'm leaving.

Isagi: No, you're not. Can we please focus for two seconds?

Shidou: no

Reo: no

Bachira: no 😭

Rin: No.

Sae: No.

Kaiser: Also no.

Isagi: ...Right. Thanks, everyone.

Isagi: The code is 456791—

Bachira: FOUR FIVE SIX SEVENNNNNNNN

Barou: OH MY GOD. IF I HAVE TO HEAR THAT STUPID STUFF  ONE MORE TIME, I'M MUTING EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU.

→ HOST CLICKS "START GAME"!

→ ISAGI HAS JOINED THE GAME (messi_is_me)

→ RIN HAS JOINED THE GAME (rin)

→ SHIDOU HAS JOINED THE GAME (HUGH MUNGUS)

→ BACHIRA HAS JOINED THE GAME (ben.d.over)

→ REO HAS JOINED THE GAME (richdaddyreal)

→ CHIGIRI HAS JOINED THE GAME (imagine losing)

→ BAROU HAS JOINED THE GAME (EMPEROR_OF_GOALS)

→ GAGAMARU HAS JOINED THE GAME (forestwifi_survivor)

→ LOKI HAS JOINED THE GAME (cantcatchmebro)

→ HUGO HAS JOINED THE GAME (whyamihereagain)

→ CHARLES HAS JOINED THE GAME (tax_evasion_jr)

→ NESS HAS JOINED THE GAME (kaisers_number1fan)

→ KAISER HAS JOINED THE GAME (THE KAISER)

→ SAE HAS JOINED THE GAME (favorite_son)

Bachira: WHY DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE FBI'S MOST WANTED LIST 😭😭😭

Reo: We have tax evasion, identity issues, narcissism, and... whatever HUGH MUNGUS is.

Shidou: Hugh Mungus is a timeless classic.

Ness: Why is nobody talking about ben.d.over?

Bachira: THANK YOU FOR THE RECOGNITION 🫶

Rin: favorite_son.

Sae: Hi.

Rin: Change it.

Sae: No.

Rin: I hope your connection dies.

Bachira: WAIT Y’ALL KAISER’S USERNAME ACTUALLY GOES SO HARD??? KAISER LITERALLY MEANS EMPEROR SO HIS USERNAME IS BASICALLY JUST "THE EMPEROR"

Hugo: unfortunately that has insane aura

Ness: as expected.

Barou: tch.

Bachira: NO BAROU THIS IS SO FUNNY YOURS IS EMPEROR_OF_GOALS. HIS IS JUST THE EMPEROR 😭😭😭

Charles: emperor_of_goals123 was taken 😭

Barou: SHUT UP.

Hugo: it genuinely sounds like the username of a kid who spent 400 robux on a crown accessory.

Shidou: and his bio says "don't mess with me..." 💀💀💀

Rin: This is painful to listen to.

Bachira: AND THEN THIS GUY JUST SHOWS UP AS THE KAISER

Reo: Bro doesn't even need a username.

Charles: That's the account that bans you from the server.

Kaiser: Glad someone understands.

Barou: nobody understands.

Ness: as expected of kaiser.

Rin: stop glazing.

Ness: never.

→ HOST STARTS THE GAME

→ KAHOOT MUSIC STARTS BLASTING

Bachira: THIS IS A TODDLER QUESTION 😭

Chigiri: I'M CRYING THIS CAN'T BE REAL.

Hugo: Did Isagi make this for preschoolers?

Isagi: HEY.

Loki: Are the questions going to get harder?

Isagi: Yes.

Loki: Good.

Charles: WATCH SOMEONE STILL GET IT WRONG—

Barou: Tsk. Who would even get this wrong?

Reo: My little cousins could answer this.

Charles: My dog could answer this.

Hugo: Your dog watches football?

Charles: No, but he's probably more qualified than some people here.

Barou: Tch.

Rin: Why is this lobby already unbearable?

Sae: Because you're in it.

Rin: shut up.

Gagamaru: wait…does goalkeeper count

Isagi: ...

Bachira: NO.

Reo: Gagamaru.

Charles: PLEASE TELL ME YOU DIDN'T JUST ASK THAT.

Hugo: I'm begging you to say you're joking.

Gagamaru: What?? I'm just checking.

Rin: Checking what?

Barou: WHAT ELSE WOULD HE BE???

Bachira: he thinks the keeper is an optional purchase 😭😭😭

Charles: UNLOCK GOALKEEPER FOR $4.99—

Hugo: —GOALKEEPER SOLD SEPARATELY

Gagamaru: that's not what i meant

Isagi: THEN WHAT DID YOU MEAN 😭

Gagamaru: i don't know anymore

Shidou: HE FORGOT HIS OWN ARGUMENT 😭😭😭

Loki: the goalkeeper is, in fact, a player.

Bachira: THANK YOU LOKI

→ LEADERBOARD AFTER Q1:

🥇 1st - THE KAISER 🥈 2nd - favorite_son 🥉 3rd - cantcatchmebro 4th - messi_is_me 5th - whyamihereagain

Kaiser: first place. exactly where I belong.

Bachira: THE USERNAME ACTUALLY MATCHED THE RESULT 😭😭😭

Ness: As expected.

Charles: NESS YOU'RE SAYING THAT LIKE YOU DIDN'T GET LAST

Ness: My purpose was not personal victory.

Reo: BRO IS A SUPPORT NPC

Loki: third place is unacceptable.

Hugo: bro.

Chigiri: you are literally on the podium.

Loki: I should have been first.

Shidou: BRO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT THIRD WHILE SOME OF US ARE FIGHTING FOR SURVIVAL 😭

Barou: EXACTLY. BE THANKFUL YOU ARE NOT IN DOUBLE DIGITS.

Loki: That is irrelevant.

Reo: NO IT IS NOT 😭

Rin: why is Sae above me.

Sae: because I answered correctly.

Shidou: AHAHAHAHA

Bachira: ROUND TWO KAISER I'M COMING FOR YOUUUU.

Kaiser: Try me.

Loki: I will take first.

Charles: OH GREAT HE'S EVEN MORE MOTIVATED NOW

Hugo: Someone remind them this is Kahoot…

Isagi: ...

Rin: …

Bachira: WHY ARE THERE NUMBERS 😭

Shidou: I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR MATH CLASS 💀

Charles: IS THIS STILL KAHOOT OR DID I ACCIDENTALLY JOIN A SCHOOL EXAM.

Barou: Tch. Finally, something that requires thought.

Bachira: OH NO. THE SMART PEOPLE ARE QUIET.

Shidou: SOMEONE SAY THE ANSWER.

Bachira: PLEASE I AM BEGGING. I WILL DO ANYTHING.

Reo: No.

Bachira: REO?????

Reo: Figure it out.

Shidou: YOU'RE ALL SO ANNOYING.

Loki: It's a competition.

Rin: I know how to solve it.

Sae: No you don't.

Rin: ...

Charles: NAHHHHHH HE GOT EXPOSED BY HIS OWN BROTHER 💀

Reo: Bro skipped math class and thought nobody would notice.

Rin: I didn't skip.

Sae: You slept through it.

Rin: I hate all of you.

Bachira: IT'S OKAY RIN, WE BELIEVE IN YOU 🙏

Rin: I don't need your pity.

Chigiri: He definitely needs the pity.

→ LEADERBOARD AFTER Q2:

🥇 1st - THE KAISER 🥈 2nd - cantcatchmebro 🥉 3rd - favorite_son 4th - richdaddyreal 5th - whyamihereagain

Charles: WAIT. THE LEADERBOARD JUST EXPOSED WHO ACTUALLY SOLVED THAT QUESTION 😭

Reo: Wasn't exactly hard to figure out.

Charles: NO BECAUSE WHY DID THE PEOPLE WHO WENT QUIET ALL END UP AT THE TOP 💀

Hugo: We were calculating.

Shidou: I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE JUST IGNORING US.

Loki: We were solving.

Charles: BRO THIS WAS A SECRET MATH CLUB THE WHOLE TIME 😭

Kaiser: It was obvious.

Ness: Naturally.

Reo: Ness, please don't make this about Kaiser.

Ness: I was stating a fact.

Bachira: I KNEW SOMETHING WAS WRONG WHEN YOU GUYS STOPPED YELLING.

Chigiri: The loud ones were too busy panicking.

Shidou: EXCUSE ME I WAS THINKING.

Hugo: You were arguing with a percentage.

Shidou: SAME THING.

Barou: Tch. At least some people here have common sense.

Gagamaru: The math people have formed an alliance.

Hugo: Unfortunately, yes.

Charles: WE HAVE A KAHOOT ELITE CLASS NOW 💀

Bachira: THEY DIDN'T EVEN USE THE BADGE LMAOOOOOO

Reo: BRO THEY JUST PUT KAISER THERE 😭

Shidou: BASTARD MÜNCHEN HAS BEEN RENAMED TO BASTARD KAISER 💀

Barou: Tch. They should've cropped him out.

Rin: They couldn't even be bothered.

Sae: They didn't need to.

Ness: I don't see the issue. Kaiser represents Bastard München.

Kaiser: WOULD ALL OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Shidou: MY BAD BASTARD KAISER.

Bachira: SORRY BASTARD KAISER 😭

Reo: APOLOGIES, MR. BASTARD KAISER.

Hugo: That's President Bastard Kaiser to you.

Kaiser: STOP FUCKING CALLING ME THAT.

Isagi: whatever you say bastard kaiser 😭

Kaiser: I'M GOING TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF ALL OF YOU.

Loki: …There are five seconds left.

Shidou: HURRY UP BASTARD KAISER

→ LEADERBOARD AFTER Q3:

🥇 1st - cantcatchmebro 🥈 2nd - favorite_son 🥉 3rd - THE KAISER 4th - richdaddyreal 5th - whyamihereagain

Loki: Finally. That's more like it.

Isagi: BASTARD KAISER JUST GOT RELEGATED TO THIRD 😭

Kaiser: This game is fucking rigged.

Hugo: Eh? You lost first place to your own temper.

Ness: He was unnecessarily provoked.

Shidou: BRO CRASHED OUT SO HARD HE DROPPED TWO PLACES 😭

Barou: Pathetic.

Isagi: Imagine getting ratioed by your own club logo.

Reo: That's actually the funniest throw I've ever seen 😭

Kaiser: Jesus fucking Christ, shut up.

Gagamaru: Bastard Kaiser~ 🎶

Charles: BAAAASTARD KAIIIISERRRR

Bachira: COME ON BASTARD KAISER!! BRING IT HOME!! 📣

Kaiser: You know what? Enjoy your kindergarten comedy, fuck off.

→ KAISER LEFT THE CALL.

Shidou: WE ACTUALLY BULLIED HIM OFF THE CALL

Reo: NO WAY THAT WORKED LMFAOOOOOO

Hugo: Now that's one way to lose first place.

Loki: Well, less competition i guess.

→ NESS LEFT THE CALL.

Charles: HE TOOK HIS ESCORT WITH HIM

Bachira: NESS DIDN'T EVEN HESITATE LMAOOOOOO

Isagi: Bro hit "Leave with party."

Shidou: BASTARD KAISER FC HAS OFFICIALLY BEEN DISBANDED

Barou: Good. One less person above me.

Bachira: We lost THE KAISER but we still have EMPEROR_OF_GOALS 😭

Barou: Watch your mouth.

Isagi: Bro couldn't wait five seconds.

Barou: STRIKER.

Shidou: STRIKERRRRR

Isagi: Striker.

Bachira: STRIKER EASY

Sae: Midfielder.

Charles: MIDFIELD RAHHHHH

Bachira: WAIT…DID NOBODY PICK DEFENDER?

Chigiri: LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOO

Loki: That's rough.

Reo: NOBODY PICKED GOALKEEPER EITHER

Shidou: BRO GOT 90 MINUTES OF PREMIUM SEATING 😭

Barou: They don't even run.

Charles: PROFESSIONAL BALL WATCHER 💀

Bachira: Front row seats every single week—

Gagamaru: Uhm, can I say something?

Charles: Bro, they're literally ju—

Gagamaru: Just listen...I think it's goalkeeper. When I was a striker, if I missed, I always believed another chance would come. Now that I'm a goalkeeper, it doesn't really feel like that anymore. One mistake can decide everything. People remember the goal you let in more than the saves before it. You spend the whole match protecting everyone else's mistakes, but if you make one yourself, there's nobody left behind you. That's why I think it's the hardest.

Charles: Yeah, but—

Gagamaru: When you're the last person, there's nobody to save you.

Charles: …

Barou: Damn.

Bachira: BRO JUST CASUALLY DROPPED THE HARDEST SPEECH OF THE NIGHT???

Charles: WHO LET SHAKESPEARE POSSESS BRO 😭

Reo: WHY WAS THAT ACTUALLY SO COLD???

Isagi: …I don't even have a counterargument.

Hugo: Yeah… me neither.

Sae: Well said.

Reo: …I don't even want to make goalkeeper jokes anymore.

Hugo: Yeah.

Isagi: Fair enough.

→ LEADERBOARD AFTER Q4:

🥇 1st - cantcatchmebro 🥈 2nd - favorite_son 🥉 3rd - whyamihereagain 4th - messi_is_me 5th - richdaddyreal

Barou: Tch.

Isagi: Fair enough.

Reo: Can't even argue with that.

Loki: Gagamaru's right. Modern goalkeepers are the last line of defense and the first line of attack. That's why they're objectively the most important position on the pitch.

Gagamaru: Thanks, Loki.

Isagi: Anyway, last five are True or False with a five-second timer...you can fight after the game's over.

Charles: BRO THINKS HE'S A DICTATOR 😭

Shidou: BRUH WE CAN'T EVEN TALK ANYMORE

Bachira: FREE MY YAPPERS 😭

Hugo: We should've done this earlier.

Rin: About time.

Isagi: BRO YOU GUYS ARE LITERALLY PROVING MY POINT—

→ FOUR QUESTIONS LATER…CURRENT RANKING:

🥇 1st - cantcatchmebro 🥈 2nd - favorite_son 🥉 3rd - whyamihereagain 4th - messi_is_me 5th - ben.d.over

Charles: DOUBLE DIGIT GANG HOW ARE WE FEELING?!

Shidou: LMAOO WAIT WHY IS BAROU DEAD LAST?!

Barou: THE RANKING IS FAKE.

Isagi: DUDE STOP you say that every time you lose lmaoo

Barou: MY LITTLE SISTERS ARE THE REASON.

Bachira: YOUR SISTERS??

Reo: WHAT DID THEY DO?!

Barou: THEY SAW ME PLAYING AND NOW THEY'RE RANDOMLY CLICKING ANSWERS.

Bachira: OOOOOH SO YOU'RE LETTING THEM DO THAT?

Barou: THEY'RE JUST HAVING FUN

Shidou: OH MY GOD HE'S ACTUALLY LETTING THEM.

Bachira: THE KING SACRIFICED HIS RANKING FOR HIS SISTERS.

Charles: CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT UNLOCKED

Shidou: EMPEROR_OF_GOALS...more like BIGBROTHER_OF_GOALS.

Barou: SHUT UP.

Shidou: NAH THIS IS THE SOFTEST THING YOU'VE EVER DONE.

Barou: I SAID SHUT UP.

Isagi: You're not even denying it.

Barou: JUST START THE LAST QUESTION.

→ MEANWHILE, ON THE NG11 GROUPCHAT...

Rin: ISAGI.

Isagi: What.

Rin: WHY IS THIS A QUESTION.

Isagi: I didn't write it—

Rin: YOU'RE THE HOST.

Isagi: That doesn't mean I made the questions—

Sae: Interesting.

Rin: DON'T.

Sae: I haven't said anything.

Rin: YOU WERE ABOUT TO.

Sae: You seem confident.

Rin: BECAUSE I AM.

Shidou: AHAHAHAHA NO WAY THEY PUT THE ITOSHI BATTLE IN THE KAHOOT.

Loki: This is exactly why I stayed.

Hugo: Oh my god it's happening.

Sae: For the record, the answer is obvious.

Rin: Yeah. It's me.

Sae: I wasn't talking about you.

Rin: SAY THAT AGAIN.

Sae: The answer is obvious.

Rin: NO. THE PART AFTER THAT.

Sae: I know.

Rin: YOU'RE DOING THIS ON PURPOSE.

Sae: Maybe.

Shidou: SAE-CHAN JUST STARTED A WAR~

Sae: Don't call it that.

Shidou: TOO LATE.

Bachira: LOOOOOL RIN'S ABOUT TO EXPLODE.

Rin: I'M NOT.

Isagi: You're literally screaming right now bro be for real right now—

Rin: SHUT UP

Barou: FINALLY. A QUESTION WITH A CORRECT ANSWER.

Everyone: ???

Barou: C. THEY'RE BOTH UNBERABLE. Two arrogant pieces of shit fighting over who's better—

Shidou: BAROU JUST SAID WHAT EVERYONE WAS THINKING 😭

Bachira: THE KAHOOT HAS BECOME TOO POWERFUL.

Isagi: GUYSSSSS answer before the timer runs ouuuut

Shidou: NO. LET THEM FIGHT.

Bachira: YES.

Charles: THE QUESTION CAN WAIT~

Gagamaru: So… are we answering?

Shidou: BEST KAHOOT EVER.

→ FINAL KAHOOT LEADERBOARD:

🥇 cantcatchmebro 🥈 whyamihereagain 🥉 messi_is_me

Shidou: AHAHAHAHAHAHA THE KAHOOT JUST COOKED BOTH ITOSHIS.

Charles: NO WAY 😭

Bachira: THE FINAL QUESTION WAS ACTUALLY EVIL. C WAS THE CORRECT ANSWER????

Loki: A win is a win.

Hugo: Hmm. Second place, as expected.

Reo: Don't tell me you're making this a destiny thing.

Hugo: It was simply meant to happen.

Isagi: WOAHHH I GOT THIRD?

Shidou: WAIT THE HOST GOT THIRD?

Bachira: HOLD ON. IS THAT NOT A LITTLE CHEATING?

Reo: You literally had control of the whole thing.

Chigiri: LMAOOO BAROU DIDN'T GET HIS REVENGE TODAY DAMN

Barou: Don't bring that up.

Shidou: AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Bachira: BRO CAME BACK FOR REVENGE AND GOT SOLD AGAIN.

Barou: MY SISTERS WERE INVOLVED.

Isagi: Alright, Loki...you won. So, what's going to be your dare?

Loki: It's simple. Someone's going to spend the next hour flooding one of Teddy Knight's posts with the most unimaginable comments possible.

Chigiri: What.

Bachira: WAIT THAT'S ACTUALLY SO EVIL 😭

Charles: THAT BLOKE IS GONNA BE SO CONFUSED

Shidou: AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Isagi: So who's doing it?

Loki: ...Rin. And before you say no…I already know you're too prideful to write any of it yourself. So Charles will be writing every comment.

Charles: Already got the drafts hah! You're gonna love them!

Loki: Your only job is to post them.

Hugo: You really thought this through, huh?

Loki: Of course.

Rin: WHY THE FUCK AM I THE ONE DOING THIS STUPID ASS DARE… I'M NOT SPAMMING SOME RANDOM GUY'S ACCOUNT BECAUSE YOU IDIOTS THOUGHT IT'D BE FUNNY… GO FUCK YOURSELVES—

Sae: Keep going. You're entertaining everyone!

Rin: I HATE ALL OF YOU—

→ VIEWED REPLIES:

goalhanger nah delete the account bro it's over PACK IT UP 💔😂

offsidemerchant so THIS is what being benched does to a mf 😭😭😭

tapinexpert i know shidou is somewhere giggling like an idiot

rinsbiggesthater i used to pray for times like this 🙏

TapInTerrorist THIS ISN'T EVEN DICKRIDING ANYMORE THIS IS A WHOLE UBER

LongBallLover refreshing this thread is like opening christmas presents except every gift is another felony 👻👻

CounterPressing notes app apology by 6 btw

Duolingo Looks like someone's passionate. Learn French today! 🇫🇷💚

part one here. dedicated to @blkbaecrimsonx and @stal1n33 ☆

© sevarchive ➵ masterlist ʚɞ like/reblogs are appreciated ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ໒꒱

[maybeiwrite789]

Guys WIP but im writinggg- TRUST╰(*°▽°*)╯

Also who wants to be added in the taglist (comment pls❤️)