How are you doing out there?
As I imagine you noticed, we haven’t had a new chapter of, well, anything lately. I finally got a handle on my cold/flu and hoped to write this week and especially this long weekend, but it isn’t happening.
I didn’t sleep well Sunday night. I had a crazy urge to get up and turn on the computer, but I really needed the rest so tossed and turned until my alarm went off. It finally did, and I crawled out of bed, made my breakfast, turned on the computer, went to facebook, and almost threw up. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know what terrible news I was greeted with.
More than Tom Hiddleston, David Bowie has been my wriring muse for decades. Hell, he’s been my everything muse. Feeling confused, pull out the Bowie CD. Need to laugh, pull out the Labyrinth DVD, You name it, if I felt it, something of David’s was appropriate for the occassion.
We all joke about how much we ‘love’ various celebrities, and I’m no different from anyone in that regard. But Monday morning I discovered that i really loved this man as a person. That his death devestated me more than any death I’ve ever faced before...and at fifty-five, I’ve seen many deaths, friends, family members, other loved ones, beloved pets. I thought I could handle death just fine, thank you very much. Well, I’m not handling this one very well at all. Maybe it means I’m crazy, maybe it doesn’t, but I’m still tearful almost a full week later. And when I say tearful, I mean a torrent of ugly tears.
It will stop eventually as life goes on, and these foolish tears for a man I’d never met will end. But for now, the world is a far darker place, and my imagination is stifled. Once it is freed again, I will pick up the stories where I’ve left off. This may be in a few days, a few weeks, but it may be a few months. All I can promise you is that I WILL get back to them, I just don’t know when the words will resume their usual flow. I will announce it here when I’m able to start writing again.
I’m truly sorry that I’m not stronger than this and hope that you will forgive me.
P.S. I've also discovered I can't read Labyrinth Fiction right now. Insult added to injury - and it's now almost two weeks later and I'm STILL having torrents of weeping.
