While i LOVE Ethan Ramsey with all my heart, I'm not sure how i think about his age difference MC.
I mean, he's like 10? 11?
Personally, I think is a good age difference. Beyond 14-15 years it would become problematic (I say this as someone who has dated and liked older guys than me so you can disagree with me).
However, what makes this relationship problematic - more than age difference- is the fact that Ethan is in a position of power over MC. He's their boss/mentor. Even if he wouldn't use his position to get MC, the fact that he's their boss is enough.
I say he wouldn't use his position to get MC based only on his personality (the fact that he ran away and was hesitant to any romantic involving with MC proves that, because he didn't want to jeopardize their career) because the awful coding transforms Ethan to a horrible harrasser if you don't romance him. He doesn't coerce you, but he has suggestive interactions with MC to the point of being harassing (in his kitchen, the BDSM etc). So I wouldn't say Ethan is abusive himself, it's the bad coding that makes you see him that way when you're not interested in him.
And if you add gender to this equation? uffff a lot more questionable (reprochable) if your MC is a woman 😔 The kitchen scene in book 1 was a red flag for PB to fix the problem, but when it happened again in the cabin in book 2, and again in book 3 with the bdsm scene, it's really disappointing to see his they don't care about non-Ethan-romancers and how they're normalizing delicate and abusive situations that could even trigger some thoughts or feelings in some readers.
Anyway, I know this confession was more simple than that but I kinda woke up opinionated today 😂