#morerealtalk

[stevenbthegreat]

GoodBye #MoreRealTalk #StevenBTheGreat

[saviorandlord]

Anonymous: I've never officially asked a girl out on a date. One for coffee, but I'm picky in so many ways.. plus already feel like I'll get turned down anyway.. My Reply: Sometimes it doesn't hurt to ask oneself what the worst that can happen is. I find this emboldens me to take action. It just helps us to realize how trivial it should be to us. Our identity is firmly in rooted in Christ not the accepted or rejection of other human beings. If she doesn't say yes, she's losing out on a great opportunity to be blessed by your presence. If she says yes, remember she is as much being evaluated by you, as you are being evaluated by her.They need to know that it's a mutual line of consideration, and that's one of the reasons why starting out as friends is a great course of action. I would like to one day meet her as a friend, and let that relationship develop in that manner, then to pursue romance if that's something we both desire.There's no such thing as a friend zone. That can be destroyed in a matter of minutes. The key is if you get to know her as a friend you get to know who she is more authentically. If you treat it as a romance from the beginning you'll get some degree of filter. She'll hold back if she's trying to impress you. You may not be yourself, even maybe on an unintentional level subconsciously, just trying to impress her to some degree. If you're friends the expectations aren't elevated, and the fullness of a relationship can be explored without the added pressures of success or failure in a romantic relationship.I will add it's good to be selective, but I believe a lot of Christian girls have selectivity down to a fault. If her list requires you to be 6'1 and she won't go out with you because you're 5'11, she could be missing out on a great guy because of a relatively arbitrary requirement. I try to minimize my personal requirements in terms of having a "type" physically. I have them for sure, but it's a very broad appreciation of beauty. I am attracted to a wide range of body types, hair color, eye color, demeanor, attitude, etc.. The key is that she is a God fearing woman who has a heart for serving Him and is capable of supporting me in ministry. If she has that and I have an initial physical attraction towards her, as far as I am concerned we're in business and we have potential from my perspective. As long as of course the feeling is mutual, and she is receptive of my advances when the time comes.