#mortality-

[likethelinen]

Good morning kids death is imminent

[himenoawayuki]

"REMEMBERR, REALITY IS AN ILLUSION THE UNIVERSE IS A HOLOGRAM BUY GOLD BYEEEE" *disappears in a flash of light*

[thundersnapp]

what would happen if I died? who would even tell all my friends on the internet? wow that would be horrible if  just up and disappeared and nobody knew I died well at least I don't plan on dying any time soon I guess still that would be awful I'd feel awful

[poorfrankie-blog]

then i pictured myself as a college kid with stickers stuck to their 3-ring binder "tissues for your cissues" "live slow die whenever" "gaywad"

[poorfrankie-blog]

MATH??

scri: im trying to figure out headcanon life expectancies across the hemospectrum and

scri: doc scratch said that the handmaid would have died within a dozen or two sweeps if not under his care, so then let's say rustblood life expectancy is about 50 human years

scri: (but shorter because of death threats in alternian society)

scri: and then-- we know that the condesce spent ~1200 years with the psiioniic and ~1200 years floating in space after his death waiting to get back to alternia

scri: so let's say that was about a quarter of her lifespan wasted-- the human equivalent would be a ten-year marriage to the psiioniic and then ten years spent in prison, for example

scri: that would mean the condesce's life expectancy is 192 times greater than a rustblood's

scri: but ok i'm bad at math. from that estimate how do you determine the rest of theirs i forget

scri: i'm so embarrassed omg

breadt: dude i dont actually know uhhhhh

breadt: youre the one who took stats man

scri: wait isn't this basic algebra, isn't this fucking slope shit

brett: is it????

scri: i don't know i'm too stupid give me a minute

scri: cause like there are twelve slots because twelve blood colors

scri: and

brett: im sorry are you sighing at me or yourself

scri: MYSELF hahahaha no don't worry

scri: no ok there's no way this is too ridiculous a curve there's no way this is any kind of line

brett: yeah its probably exponential

scri: i have no FUCKING IDEA

brett: we're not math people

scri: I TOOK ALGEBRA FOR LIKE A MONTH LAST YEAR AND.... I'M STILL TOO DUMB...........

[poorfrankie-blog]

Serious as a heart attack.

be still my heart

[poorfrankie-blog]

this week on Things I Hate Thursdays (special monday edition)

when reporters inhale sharply before they start speaking did you know that carbon dioxide poisoning will kill you faster than oxygen deprivation? : )