Identifying trauma within us ~ The beginning of the healing path
The first essential step towards healing is, of course, a sincere and unashameful recognition of what we truly feel, at the depth of ourselves. It doesn't matter if we can't explain it or rationalize it clearly. Recognizing what you feel and not judging, suppressing or hurting yourself for it is where to begin. Evolutionary astrology can be really helpful here, especially if you are the kind of person that tends to doubt yourself, your feelings, your thoughts and perceptions and not trust your most intense inner knowing (many people with intense histories of abuse can feel that). Your Pluto placement, your Uranus hard aspects, your nodes of the moon don't lie. Studying them with openness and a willingness to face your own reactions to this kind of material can revel many things in a relatively quickly way. And that may be quite overwhelming, being so brutally exposed to yourself. But, if you're truly willing to recover your wholeness as a human being, bringing all that to the conscious awareness can be quite useful. The tricky thing with all this process is the cruel question that starts to arise in our heads: What the fuck am I suppose to do with all this pain? Many great psychologists defend that conscious awareness of a deep unconscious patter can really heal it. But we know for experience that it isn't always that simple, especially with the kind of trauma that I'm talking about. I'm talking about the complex type of trauma that haunts people though an incredible number of LIVES. It's multidimensional in nature. It doesn't even matter if you can't consciously accept that other-lifes are real or whatever, what does matter is the recognition of a pain that is SO deep and SO serious that just isn't explainable sometimes. It's what you feel as part of who you are, because it has become so central to you. You have become attached to it at some level (that's Pluto, folks). And, even if you're someone that doesn't feel like you're holding to some pain, you are, in one way or another, holding to SOMETHING, and that "something" is your Pluto, it's your multimensional nature. Over and over again.
Anyway, let's go back to the question: WHAT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ALL THIS PAIN THAT I'VE BEEN NOTICING IN MYSELF? Evolutionary astrology by itself can't do much more than reveling it to you, after that you are on your own again (that's the feeling that you may have, but know that that's not true). That's the beginning of a search for healing therapies, healing modalities. What to do? That's it's quite personal, but I'd say that the best you can do it's let your intuition and your soul lead you to the best modalities for you. Again, that's a little tricky because I'm quite aware of how hard (and expensive!) it is to find something or someone that resonates with you at the deepest level, especially because, in my experience at the therapeutic field, many "therapists" and "coaches" out there don't have sufficient understanding to deal with really serious issues that people have and they prefer to try to simply "eliminate" the obvious sintoms and not the deep roots of the emotionals and psychological traumas. BUT, the most important thing that I really want to say it's that YOU AND YOUR FEELINGS ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT THING! Let your inner self guide your healing, even if it goes against all the mainstream (and, many times, harmful) stuff that people say about "healing" (even the so-call "spiritual community". You have all the right to say "no" to anything that you don't feel it's right for you, no matter who is saying). Beginning a habit of trusting yourself is, by itself, therapeutic, by the way.
Well, by now you may be wondering if I can give any suggestions of healing modalities to someone that it's trying to begin to deal with their deepest emocionals issues but feels clueless. By my experience, developing a meditation practice it's one of the best things (I'm a Pluto in the 6th, so I need to go to my polarity point, the 12th house). I mainly do channeled meditations, but that's because of my evolutionary need to surrender to the divine. Maybe that's not you... Looking at your Pluto polarity point and your north node can be really useful, btw! They can give you insights about the kind of stuff you need to integrate. Searching for techniques that focus on that may be interesting.
Anyway, I really hope this post can help at some level. I know how hard all of that can be, so I send my love and appreciation to anyone who is deeply involved in their own growth and healing. Your healing is our healing, as a collective. We truly are together on this.