#muttspinkthing

[bring-me-back-a-dog]

When I get my hands on that fucking pink thing.

[starbound-mutt]

you thought that summoning an incubus would mean that if you ordered he'd be all over you, hands and tongue worshiping every part of your body, some demonic expertise in making you feel oh so good, on his knees waiting to serve you, at your every command for your pleasure alone

but, apparently, you were wrong, and now you've somehow ended up on your knees, desperately rutting against his platform boots, your mouth searching for any bit of uncovered skin, the taste of him sending some stupid wave of pleasure through your body, you meant to have him pushed up against a wall or into your bed, abusing his holes for your own sick want, but when your mouth was his it was over before you knew it

the sweet taste of his spit was addictive, made your whole body warm with need, you wanted more, more of him, more of anything he'd give you, do whatever you could to have it, so when he ordered you to drop to your knees and hump against his boot, you did so without hesitation, especially when he held the possibility of allowing your mouth on his sex if you did a good enough job at rutting yourself stupid on his boots

[bring-me-back-a-dog]

"Look at this! Another stupid church in another stupid town. Like, I honestly feel like, we have enough churches already and you know, that I know, we don't need another one. I guess if nobody else will do something, I will. It's not, like, I have to do everything already anyways."

And with this it begins. The annoyance. I feel like any self-respecting entity could jump straight to arson but we're not dealing with a self-respecting entity or with something that actually bothers to get anything useful done.

The reign of 'terror' starts small. Every 'stick it to the man' plot taking place late at night, when the incubus assumes no one else is around. Objects moved from their places and hidden. Objects being moved a couple inches from their original spot. Things turned upside down. Bibles defiled by placing dog-eared tags on random chapters just to ruin their wrinkle free pages. Chairs turned upside down and doors being locked without reason. Of course the church kitchen has been 'raided', but that wasn't done out of malice just greed. Greed mostly consisting of opening everything but trying only a little bit of each thing. At least it's sealed or repackaged so the food doesn't spoil immediately but man it's annoying. And kind of considerate? In a debatable way.

None of this happens all in one night. Just a little at a time. A few things here or there. Give it a couple of days and then something else. This goes on for, at least, a couple weeks or longer, when everything he's done can be chalked up to human forgetfulness. It does start to ramp up, more things happening in one night if the pink and red menace feels like he can get away with it. Almost everyday now too. It's becoming- well- it's still fucking annoying.

It all leads up to one night. Kitchen raided once again, candles all out of their holders, rugs scrunched up so someone will trip in the morning, and one room even has chairs from several other rooms all stacked in odd formations. A true masterpiece from a fearsome beast. And what's that beast doing now? Oh yeah, trying to flip over a pew or two.

"This stupid- stupid piece of dumb fucking wood! God, this thing is like, so heavy- and for no reason! Who puts wood this hard to move in their church? Stupid dumb idiot human people!" Huffing, the incubus tries another pew to see if that one will move easier. But to no one, except the demons surprise, it doesn't move. It's only another minute of struggle before he gives up, tail lashing back and forth in anger.

No longer considering the fact that maybe he should be quiet in case anyone was still around, the oddly pink thing, keeps bitching, "Fine! Fine! I hate human furniture, it's not even comfortable. Who wants to sit on a dumb, hard block of wood all day. Like, how does that even make sense? Maybe it's because they're so god-crazy like- what are those things they have- sheep! Yeah, like, sheep! Sheep are the ones that follow people around, aren't they? Whatever! Doesn't matter. What else can I fuck with instead?"

Stark white candles catch it's eye, the ones he flipped over earlier on the communion table. "I guess I could, like, just hide the holders. Maybe throw them outside, or something." Not paying attention while he grabs for one, he knocks another over. That one knocks into another. And another. And another. Annnnnd soon the most of the metal holders hit the floor with a symphony of metal clangs that are not only awful on the ears, but terribly loud as well. All the demon can do is cringe, the sharp metal noise sending a shiver down his spine, making his tail twitch rapidly to cope with the ear-grinding noise.

The incubus just stands there, in disbelief of his mistake. Torn oddly between wanting to clean it up because this wasn't done on purpose and just leaving it there. Poor bastard should have left as soon as they hit the floor but instead he's trying to process what to do next. "Okay, well, that definitely wasn't my fault."

The first two nights Father Thomas chalks the missing items and knocked over books to his own drinking 'Yeah, my fault, let's just...' and he'd clean it up.

On night three when the kitchen was raised he blamed his husband Beelzebub, angrily drawing up the devil's sigil and incredulously gesturing to the trashed kitchen with a wide arm "Explain."

Ba'al rubs his chin and digs through his own skull to remember... but nothing comes. "Wasn't me." he shrugs and snaps his fingers to go back to what he was doing in Hell. Thomas isn't having this and summons him again, this time via enn and ring. "It had to be you. Nobody else is this much of a fatass."

"...OK first of all, rude-" Ba'al huffs and crosses his arms to glare down at the priest "And secondly.. I'm on a fast" "Hey- hey stop smiling I'm serious. It's nearly summer I don't eat during drought season."

Thomas sighs and loses the attitude. "..I forgot about that. I'm sorry." "Can I go now?" "Yes love you can go."

In a puff of smoke Father Thomas is left alone to clean up the mess. When he catches whoever did this...

...

A few more nights pass and this time Thomas is alone in the library when his Lord blessed hearing picks up on muttering in the sanctuary. He slams his book shut and exits the room in silent hurry.

'What manner of idiot is in my walls..' he slows near the end of the hall and peeks around to leer at the overfed pink thing that is staring at the candle holders on the floor.. it reminds him of the way birds stare at dropped objects. He stalks closer and adjusts his wedding ring to face with the signet of Archangel Gabriel inside his palm..

'Okay, well that definitely wasn't my fault.' "Oh I think it was."

He grabs your shoulder and a paralyzing shock rips through your body that leaves you open to his suggestions "On your knees, pinky. You owe me some lip service for all of the food you ate."

[starbound-mutt]

anyways beaming the thought of being straddled by a fat incubus who's got your mouth forced open in a painful grip as he tongue fucks your face, really he's getting off on this and I mean eventually you are too, his spit is a mild aphrodisiac, but all it leads to is him grinding into you until you cum in your pants, he's going to leave you on your own floor, fuzzy in head and still choking on his spit

[starbound-mutt]

18+ ONLY, minors are not welcome

hi i will put my intro back up here soon

theres kink and whatever up ahead, please just block me if you don't like it

[starbound-mutt]

Stupid fat incubus you've managed to summon again even though you definitely used a different spell this time. God this guy is so annoying, you didn't even have sex last time! You just ate food while watching that shitty musical and being vaguely horny about it all. It was fucking weird. Oh, he's already making himself at home. Great. Fucking rummaging through the fridge like last time.

"You have, like, practically nothing in here. You know how rude it is to invite somebody over and not feed them."

"You helped yourself to my food, mind you. We were suppose to have sex, not stuff ourselves full."

You're given this annoyed look for a few seconds before he speaks again, "... Can you, like, shut up... Anyways give me your phone, I'm going to order something for us."

"I'm not paying for you to eat and fuck off again."

"It's literally the least you can do!" Oh this asshole is pushing his finger into your chest like you're the problem. "You brought me here. You've agreed to all the fine print that comes along with it. Those are the rules, stupid."

"Well I wasn't trying to summon some fat lazy fuck like you again anyways!"

That shut him up... oh.. for fucks sake. He looks like he's going to cry.. No, he's actually crying. Yelling at him made his ears drop and everything and now he's turned away from you covering his face, tail tucked between his legs. You kinda feel bad for him now, maybe,, kinda. This is such a mess, it might just be easier to apologize.

"Hey,, Hey man, look, I'm sorry.. I didn't mean to yell at you." You set a hand on his shoulder, his skin is warm in an odd way, sends a shiver up your spine that makes you take a deep breath before you contiune, "Okay, look, I'll admit I don't know a lot of about this whole 'summoning demons thing'. Things just didn't go as excepted last time and it made me frustrated. I'm sorry for yelling at you. Just don't cry, please."

He's still crying, okay.. that's fine. You'll have to try something else. You took to rubbing his back for comfort but you almost feel like you don't want to stop touching him.

"We... We can order food, if you're still hungry. Whatever you want.."

"Really? You promise?" His voice is a bit muffled because his face is still covered but he peaks through his hands to look at you.

"Yeah, as long as I get to pick the movie this time."

"Okay!" The incubus whips around and a hand is shoved into your front pocket as the greedy bastard takes your phone. It doesn't even look like he's been crying at all. Practically skipping towards your living room to make himself comfortable on your couch.

You're fairly confident the fucker played you good. At least he's kind of cute when he eats? You're not sure how to feel about this yet.

[starbound-mutt]

unfortunately thinking about that dumb incubus not wanting to touch someone with his hands so he jerks them off with his tail instead. Wrapping the end around someones cock to jerk them off, making the poor bastard he's suppose to service lick the cum off his tail so he doesn't have to touch the mess himself.

[starbound-mutt]

Summoning an incubus so you can finally lose your virginity but he makes fun of the way you organized your room and now for some reason you've been tasked with making popcorn because you guys are gonna watch some shitty b-grade movie and honestly the popcorn is just to tide you both over until the doordash he ordered off your phone gets there.

You can hope maybe this is a fuck during the movie situation, but at this point, you're honestly not sure.