Postpartum: Give it 12 weeks
Actually, if you just had a baby, maybe give it 6 weeks before you feel like you’re even going to survive or ever be normal again! Ha ha ha... Seriously though, if you just had a baby- you’re going to make it! This post is actually not about the newborn post partum phase, but feel free to keep reading.
My main inspiration for writing today is that I just finished a 12 week program to help my body get stronger after pregnancy and child birth. Giving birth to 3 children and moving 3 times in the midst of that (not to mention countless other changes), gave me little time for, well, myself.
So at the beginning of this year, shortly after our move to Vancouver and my youngest had just turned 1, I realized that my body wasn’t coping. Lower hip/back pain was keeping me up at night and affecting me throughout the day. I knew I had done very little for my body and felt quite convicted that now was the time for rehabilitation.
It started with a some research (and talking to friends). I soon realized I had diastasis recti, which, if you don’t know, is a fancy term for the muscle down the centre of the abdomen pulling apart because of high amounts of pressure. Even coming to this realization meant I had to acknowledge that that was an issue for me, which meant reconnecting with my abdomen. Who knew reconnection was necessary!
As it turns out, the first time I tried to consciously tell those muscles to do anything I had quite an adverse reaction. For me it meant going to my husband and bumbling about reconnecting and that I was about to faint and then crying and praying with him. Sound pathetic? Maybe it was. Or maybe I was just admitting my dependence on him and God and that I was ready to do whatever it took to get strong again.
Diastasis recti wasn’t my only issue, but a major one. My friend was recovering from something similar and recommended a work out program that specialized in recovering from it. Sidenote: certain exercises can make it worse, so if you suspect that you might have it as well, do a little research and refrain from doing crunchies or planks.
Here is my unabashed product placement. It helped me so I just want to share it! Check out https://mutusystem.com headed by Wendy Powell. From what I’ve observed she is very experienced with working with moms and cares about them and has a lot of good material for these issues. Also her 12 week program is what I just finished. Thank you to my mother-in-law and sister-in-law for the birthday money to purchase the program!
If you’re struggling in your post partum era here are a few encouraging words I want to give you:
1)LOVE YOURSELF! Love your body and what you’ve accomplished in bringing children into the world. Honestly, stretch marks are beautiful because it speaks of sacrifice and how you literally made room for other people in your life to the point of personal loss. That’s a loving thing to do. From that place, do what you can to give yourself what you need to thrive. The next point relates to the first.
2)SCHEDULE TIME FOR YOURSELF. If possible, ask your husband or a friend to take care of the kids, while you work out or do something that you need in order to rehabilitate. Randy and I decided to carve out an hour in the morning, 3 times a week, where I get to work out. Imagine that! And on the subject of time, give yourself time to heal. It all takes time!
3)KEEP LOVING SACRIFICIALLY. It’s a delicate dance. I find if I focus too much on one thing in my life I quickly get unbalanced and can’t cope with the other elements of my life. What I mean is, as you make time for yourself and start to do things for yourself again, don’t forget the lessons of the last season because you’re still called to love your husband and kids, sometimes until it hurts. If you were hearing me tell you this right now I’d be laughing. Probably because this is SO HARD but it brings SO MUCH JOY.
I’ve been thinking lately about who I was before I had kids. I recently got together with the roommate I had when I got engaged to Randy. She quoted me on saying that I couldn't imagine having kids because I was too self-centred. Too true, too true. Humbling but honest. My dad also reminded me of how I scoffed at the idea of having kids, even when I was engaged. It really was an act of God (well there were other acts included but I’m not talking about that right now, lol) to turn me into a mother. I’m not bashing myself. I just had a very significant change when I had my first child. Namely, I fell in love. I completely fell in love with each of my kids. I’m sure any mom reading this would agree that the hardships/obstacles a mother has to overcome at every level is astounding, but it’s not even comparable to the profound worth of bringing these children into the world.
So there are a few thoughts on post partum. And hurray for me that I accomplished my 12 week fitness program! In case you’re worried, I will be doing more than blogging to celebrate (insert nervous laugh), whenever I find time... Seriously though, I have plans to go shopping for some new clothes since most of my clothes have a subtle pregnant body shape. If you can believe it my husband is just the best at taking me shopping, so we’re going on a shopping date soon.
In closing, the post partum time is very dear to my heart because it can be so hard and I personally overcame A LOT during these times of my life. I haven’t really been able to blog or talk much about it because it’s been so hard (refer to the near fainting/crying reaction of previous paragraphs). I wrote this in case it helps any other mom and honestly, these are issues that affect all of us (loving sacrificially, loving self etc.)
Shoot me a message in the “ask me anything” part of the blog if you want to dialogue or leave a kind comment.