#mxmaknae

[brendzybee]

10pm (Part II)

10pm (Part II)

pairing: im changkyun x reader words: 3,580 genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah warnings: none rate: g summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life.

10PM (Part I)

A/N : Oh haii, so I just happened to make a part II of this , just finished my final exam and now bored waiting for my brother to pick me up from school T_T. Enjoyyy <3 Changkyun’s POV

           11pm, Saturday, I’m currently at Jooheon’s place together with the guys, everyone were silent for a moment but Minhyuk decided to kill the silence and suggested to have a beer. Jooheon and Wonho cheered and the rest just agreed about it, while for me I think I needed few cans of it. My mind is floating, y/n’s face is still very clear in my head. Right now I’m contemplating how will I text her, or should I call her. I know it should be the best thing that I should do, but I can’t seem to have the courage to do so. This feeling of guilt is just so new to me, I’ve been holding my phone for a while waiting for her to text me how angry she was, how she hates me. I think that would be better than not getting any, it seriously makes me anxious.

“So Changkyun what are you gonna do about it?” Shownu asked after taking the last gulp from his can before tossing it to the bin. I just shrug taking a sip from my can as well.

“You know what? Given y/n’s attitude I think she will just sleep her anger away and be after you again the next day.” Minhyuk said while munching his pizza.

“Me too, me too, y/n is sure to be head over heels with you Kkung.” Jooheon seconded nudging me in the shoulder.

“It’s hard to be really handsome.” Wonho stated before laughing. They are having fun with their conversation when Kihyun harshly slam the can on the table. He’s been grumpy the whole time but this no longer surprise everyone since Kihyun’s reaction over things is always different from the rest. He has always been the mother of the group, in the sense of nagging about everything, think he is the only one who is rational. Well there are times that he really is the most rational.  

“That’s my point Changkyun-ah, haven’t you realized it by now? Y/n likes you a lot, for the longest time now and what did you do? You’ve taken her for granted.” He said raising his voice, obviously mad as he finally voiced out his frustration and here I am, I can’t even answer back. I felt guilty and stupid enough.

“Kihyun-ah stop acting like a girl, just drink already. It was our idea Changkyun was just dragged with us.” Wonho said rubbing Kihyun’s back trying to calm him.

“Yes hyung, yes on Monday I will go to y/n and explain everything to her, I’ll take all the blame. Please don’t kill the fun now.” Jooheon said while making cute faces trying to make Kihyun laugh.

“Tsk, you two! Remember what I’ve told you, you will both regret this, I know right now you won’t understand, I just hope you won’t taste your own medicine.” Kihyun said slapping Jooheon’s face away while Wonho laugh loudly.

“HA! As if I would ever fall in love. There are so many girls out there lining up for me.” He added finishing the content of his can.  

           Sunday was torture, it’s the longest Sunday I ever had. I finally texted y/n that I was really sorry and told her I would buy her whatever desserts she likes. I even texted her that I would go to the amusement park with her but she didn’t reply any of it. She won’t answer my calls as well. As much as I hate to admit it, it feels a little weird not receiving lots of messages from her. Or was I just so used always getting flooded with messages and whatever from her. My phone feels a little lonely and boring since it’s so silent. It’s already past dinner yet I still have full battery, my phone battery doesn’t usually last this long because of receiving lots of notifications from her. From random text, chat and just what so ever.  I remember her sending me pictures of cute cats she wants to pet but obliviously can’t since she’s allergic to it. And also her sending me pictures of cactus, saying she wanted to pet it since she doesn’t need to water it every day. Y/n seriously needs to grow up. I suddenly question what I was doing realizing, I’m scrolling up her chatbox.

           Monday morning, I woke up extra early so I could go to her house and pick her up for school. I’m sure she will play sulky for a moment but will surely talk to me after few minutes. Especially now I prepared bribery for her, I bought her favorite strawberry milkshake. Well I’m not sure if she likes having it early in the morning, but she usually likes everything that I gave her. As what I’ve remembered I usually give her snacks, since she likes eating a lot and I just honestly don’t know what else does she like aside from food.  I didn’t text her that I’ll be picking her up early, I’m thinking of just waiting for her to come out so we could go to school together. But it’s almost 8am and she ain’t around yet, I was about to walk in when I saw her brother, he greeted me good morning with a confused tone. “I thought, y/n informed you to just meet in school since she had a sleep over at  Eun Hae’s (ur bff’s name) place since they have this morning activity with their groupmates.” Her brother stated that got me confused to, I don’t remember her saying any of that. “Aww, I didn’t know that was today, I might just have missed the dates. Thanks Hyung.” I just ended up saying before bidding him goodbye.

           The entire day at school feels a little unusual, I can’t find y/n in the place she usually stay or walk by. She used to always visit and stay in the bench where I and my friends stay, I didn’t see her at the cafeteria today as well. I wonder if she had eaten her lunch. “Looking for someone?” Wonho laughed while nudging me as he placed his food on the table. “Yeah, it feels new not seeing y/n around.” Jooheon seconded with a fake pout. “You think, she’s really serious about giving up on Changkyun this time?” Minhyuk asked in wonder. That also got me wondering if she’s really going to give up for real this time. I don’t know why but I felt a pang of pain in my chest hearing that, it felt empty. I know it’s really wrong and selfish but I wish she won’t seriously give up on me yet. Feeling slightly threatened with the possibilities, I texted her again. A long and sincere one.  Telling her how sorry I was and I really wanted to talk to her personally. It was around 3pm, in the middle of my last class when I finally got a reply from her. She agreed to just talk on our way home, and hell yeah it’s one of the new feelings I’ve been having lately, I’m nervous to see her, I’ve been contemplating what will I say to her.  Y/n what have I done and what should I do?   Y/n’s POV

            You felt really sick the entire weekend, crying over and telling Eunhae about everything that happened. Eunhae was so mad about everyone and in the midst of all that happened she didn’t say much, she was just there and listened to you all the way. You are really thankful you have your only best friend, if not you have no idea how you will be able to act as if nothing happened at home. Your family is really close to each other and talking about your feelings for Changkyun is a normal topic at home and of course your mom will openly talk about it to Changkyun’s mom. That’s how twisted everything is, and this time you don’t want anything of that. You felt really bad already and as much as possible you don’t want anyone to know about it, specially both of your families.  

           You were having stages of grief over your lost love. That Saturday night you were so angry and mad at Changkyun, you seriously want to slap him and his friends. How dare they made fun of you. But later on, you’re a crying mess, realizing your worth in Changkyun’s heart. By this time you are really sure that he doesn’t really feel anything for you, because if he does he will never toy with you, he will never toy with your feelings. He will never let his friends make fun of you. You’re used to him being mean and cold to you, that hurts a lot but that is somewhat better. At least he isn’t lying, at least he wasn’t leading you on. But this time it’s different, it’s the first time he toyed with your feelings like this, you were so happy and excited to just let your heart break. Changkyun is really your first love and also your first heart break.

           You promised to yourself before that you will never give up on him. You promised to yourself before that you will be with him and fight for him as long as he doesn’t have anyone yet. But now you realized how pathetic that promise was. You realized it’s not Changkyun’s fault alone, it’s yours as well. You’ve been forcing your feelings for him, you’ve been fooling yourself that there is a possibility of you and him. You live in your own bubble, pretending you don’t know his feelings, denying the fact that he doesn’t really liked you from the start. You always make his small gesture matter, making it a big deal to feed your own satisfaction when in fact it doesn’t really meant anything. Now you’re not just crying because he toyed with your feelings, now you’re also crying because you finally accepted the reality that nothing is really left for you and him. It’s so painful that it’s hard to breathe and cry at the same time. Words are not even enough to express the pain you are feeling right now. You are torn between missing him and the imagination of him missing you as well, but you know it’s not the real thing. Plus remembering you words at the restaurant, your pride won’t allow you to make your words into nothing.  Yes, you admit that you can really be bratty and childish at times, prideful and unforgiving as well. Changkyun knew that very well, but still he decided to hurt you that way.

           “ Don’t worry this will be the last time. I’ll stop fighting for your attention, I’ll stop texting you, I’ll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, I’ll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.”               it’s not the first time you’ve said that you’re giving up on him. But this time you’re so determined to stick to your words, you’re so hurt and tired to go after a love only you wants in the very first place.

           Monday as much as you don’t want to go to school, you don’t have a choice. It’s better to be busy at school than to mourn at your best friend’s house. You purposely made yourself really busy, volunteering to do tasks that’s not even yours. It may sound that you are avoiding him but yeah it’s really true, you don’t want to see him. Seeing him might change the decision you made over night , and you’re still so hurt to see him as well. You read his text, saying sorry as if what he did was nothing serious. He even offered to buy you anything or go with you anywhere, if it was some other time you would feel really happy about it, but this time you felt really annoyed reading it. You’re not in the mood to entertain butterfly in your stomach.  Changkyun can really be stupid at times.

           It was 2:30 in the afternoon, it was your break and you made used of it to just buy snacks you can eat on the way to the auditorium. And that’s the time you saw Changkyun’s bestfriend Jooheon walking his way towards you.  He called your attention and jogged to your place as he noticed you walking away from him. “Y/n wait” He panted while holding your wrist. “What do you want Jooheon?” You asked directly , sounding pissed.  “Y/n I’m really sorry okay? It was mine and Wonho hyung’s fault. Changkyun really doesn’t have any idea that we would be there. Y/n please.” Jooheon pleaded naturally like its no big deal. “Did Changkyun asked you to do this?” You asked  and Jooheon instantly deny it and started explaining everything that happened during that time. Saying it was his and Wonho’s idea, he was the one holding Changkyun’s phone, saying he was the one who insisted the bet. Saying Changkyun was just forced to go along to the idea of testing me.

           Hearing about him wanting to test your feelings really hurt you. Was your effort not enough? Was the way you’re expressing your feelings not enough? You are a woman too, You wished to experience someone who will sincerely like you and go after you. Someone that would make your heart flutter over trivial stuffs such as text, flowers, effort and time. But you have given up all of that because of Changkyun, because you know he will never do that for you.  

             3pm, you received another text from him, he was apologizing again and asking you if you could talk. “Fine, let’s talk.”  You texted him back as you wipe your tears walking your way to the auditorium.

 4:30pm the talk in the auditorium was over already, you didn’t even know what the hell they are talking about inside. You were so busy contemplating your emotions , your mind is flying somewhere. Thinking of possible scenarios how to make Changkyun regret for what he did, you’re thinking of how to get back at him and at least hurt him the way he has hurted you or at least make him a little sad as well, it’s not fair that it’s only you who’s suffering. You took a deep breath, counting 1-10 to composure yourself and act as cold as possible as you walk going to the car park.  You saw him standing there, his back leaning on the door frame of his car. Damn it, here goes your heart getting excited in an appropriate time again. You stand there and tried to calm yourself , remembering the things that hurts you, thinking the guy you hurt you , the guy who toy with your feelings is just there standing in front of you. And as if in cue, Changkyun turned to your direction and saw you. Not unlike his usual self, he doesn’t look as confident as he used to be, he looked anxious, well this is new. Reminds you of what happened, now it starts clouding in your chest, its heavy and suffocating. You got inside the car without greeting him anyway.  “You wanna go somewhere….I mean is there a place you wanted to go so we could talk?”  Changkyun carefully asked while turning the engine on. “No, let’s just talk here.” You stated as cold as possible, you can feel how tensed he was as he turned the engine off and sit up properly after letting out a deep breath, how the shortest time you are together this afternoon you can’t count already how many deep breath and sighs coming from him. “You can start reciting your lies now, so we could finish this talk early.” You said feeling proud of yourself as you voice didn’t crack.  You saw him sighed and turned to face you. “Look Y/n, I know you’re still so mad or even hated me right now but still I want to tell you I’m really sorry for what happened. I felt so bad about it too, I hated myself for making it happen too. But please hear me out.” You sighed hearing him, fisting your palm trying your best to control your emotions, trying your best to stop the tears from spilling from your eyes. “It may sound that I’m just justifying myself but I don’t really have any idea that they’re going to be there. I really had the intention to be there with you. They told me that we’re just going to make you wait a little, I agreed because they keep on teasing me and I was a little curious too, I know that was stupid. But as I was thinking, you won’t notice it anyway since you were so busy chatting with the waiter friend of yours, I thought it wouldn’t matter much as well. Just enough for them to go away, but everything just went out of hand.” He paused looking at you, trying to wait for your response but you decided to stay silent and not say anything. “You have all the right to hate me for making you wait that long. And about what you said that night, Y/n I didn’t do it because I hated you. I may not like it when people and our family go before me and pushed me to be with you and reciprocate your feelings but I never hated you for that. It may be really easy for you to express how you feel for me but that does not work for me Y/n. You know I’m not as expressive as you are, I’m not as sociable as you are, I enjoy my peace and privacy. I just simply didn’t like it, that’s why I easily get annoyed and frustrated every time they tease me with you. Maybe that’s the reason why I wasn’t able to stop them from betting that night. I know it’s stupid, but I didn’t mean to hurt you that night.” He said, brushing his fingers in his hair in frustration. This time you were unable to stop your tears from streaming, everything just came back to your mind as if everything happened at the moment, you’re no longer mad , just hurt about the reality that he’s talking about.  

“I know, Jooheon told me everything already.” You started with your head low not even giving him a look. “I don’t know what more about my feelings you wanted to test more. Are my efforts not enough? I don’t know why I’m getting so worked up over it, it’s just waiting. Changkyun I can wait for you for how long, I’ve waited for you for the longest time already. How much more just 5pm to 10pm, that should be nothing. Changkyun I really like you, No, I really love you, did you think that’s really easy for me to say? I’m hesitating as well, I’m hesitating every time I get rejected because of your cold treatment and constantly pushing me away. Did you think I don’t get nervous all the time I’m with you, especially when your friends are around? It’s the time where you’re colder and meaner than usual btw. But did you heard me complained about that, did I hated you for that? Changkyun I didn’t because I wanted this in the first place. I can’t even hate you after what you did that night. You know what’s hurting me more this time? Giving up the feelings I had for you for a very long time. My feelings are becoming clearer I’m falling really hard for you and this onesided love is getting a little toxic in my heart.” You closed your eyes fervently, taking a deep breath afraid of what he might say. You heard him sigh once more unable to collect his words. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know, I – I don’t know what to say Y/n.” Was the only words he came up to, it hurts but you actually felt lighter than yesterday. Confessing him everything you’re bottling up to, actually made it a little better. “It’s okay, I doesn’t matter anymore. It’ll be fine, It’ll forget about it in few days. I also wanted to tell you without sounding awkward, It might be childish but Changkyun you were my first love, I’ll stop there I’ve confessed too much already.” You faked a laugh before continuing.  “ Just give me due time and I’ll be back being that annoying little girl who follows you and your brother around when we were kids.” You smiled sincerely thinking about the old times, as you gather all your force to open the door. “Where are you going?” He asked holding your wrist. “I promised Eunhae, I’ll go home with her.” The last thing you said before stepping out of his car. A/N: WAAAAAHHHH I don’t know what going on there mwahhaahah @_@  Forgive me for I just write what ever that comes to my mind. I didn’t review and reread this btw , so forgive me as well for the lapses. Huhuhu  I’d love to hear from you guys. <3   

[brendzybee]

10pm

10pm pairing: im changkyun x reader words: 3090 genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah warnings: none rate: g summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life. A/N : I don’t really have a proper fic for this but it is somewhat connected to the other oneshots I made. <3 Cramps : http://brendzybee.tumblr.com/post/165582218066/cramps-lim-changkyun-word-count-1548

Friday evening, 8pm and you can’t wait for it to be Saturday already. You know you love weekdays a lot because , well more time with Changkyun. Your oh so loving boyfriend that only exist in your dreams. Sad life. You like Changkyun a lot ever since you were kids and everyone knows it. Your Parents knows it, Changkyun’s Parents and family knows it. Your neighbors knows it and the whole school knows it. Everybody ships you and Changkyun even the waiter and waitresses from the restaurants and café nearby ships you both.

Well you grew up to be a very bubbly and happy girl that talks a lot, talks to everyone , even talks to objects and animals. There are lots of people who likes you because of your happy and light composure, specially the ajummas and the elders, and you love it too. It feels great to be loved by many, you love it when you see people happy because of you. You can see it when they greeted you with a smile  and asks you how is it going with Changkyun and your love story even if they are busy with their own life or it’s none of their business really. People around who knows you and Changkyun for a long time are somewhat entertained with your love team. Some finds you silly , funny and crazy , some also finds you adorable and persistent, there are also people who doesn’t like you of course but it’s a waste of time to talk about them.

Aside from you being happy about how you make other people feel and fell for your charm you also somewhat wish and hope for Changkyun to feel the same, but sadly your still far from it. Changkyun doesn’t like you, he dislike you a lot and finds you annoying and childish . He is vocal about it , same as how vocal you are about liking him , he is vocal about disliking you. Everyone knows it as well. Changkyun dislikes the attention everyone is giving him because of your nonsense. He dislikes it when strangers know him because of your stories and self-made fairy tales. He dislikes it that both of your parents are close and no matter how he distance himself from you still he find himself getting trapped with you. Yes, trapped is the right word because he is never willing. Tho it hurts you most of the time you’ve gotten used to it, a little bit. Even if Changkyun is a meanie and cold towards you most of the time, you know very well that Changkyun is nice because even tho he dislikes you a lot and even tho he was just forced to put up with you, still there are also times that he was caring with you. You know that he was forced by his mom to come and go home from school together with you, tho he hates it there was never a time that he left you alone. He complains and scold you most of the time specially when you are late or being a brat again, but still he waits for you and stay with you. There are really times that he is naturally caring even tho  he didn’t intended to be.

You already fell for Changkyun when you were still kids, when he used to be gentler and nicer towards you. You thought it will be gone when you grow up and meet some other guys, but still you like only him. He have broken your heart multiple times , sometimes he is unaware that he is already hurting you emotionally and most of the time he is purposely hurting you to keep you away from him. There are so many times that you considered giving up on him, distancing yourself for a while or shutting down your feelings for him. But sadly it doesn’t work, you’ll end up missing him right away. Or you melting right away if he acts a little nice or sweet or just a little friendly towards you. That’s why in the mids of all the odds , nothing can stop you from falling for him . You are a strong believer that he was for you and you are for him and you think you’re almost getting there. Guess What???? Well, the handsome Changkyun just asked you out for a dinner date. Okay… that was a lie, it’s you who asked him out saying you got those reservation from your parents. And guess what again!!  He agreed!!!! What on earth is happening ??? Changkyun just agreed to go on a freaking dinner date with you. Isn’t it surprising ?? Isn’t it amazing ?? And that’s is the reason why you are dying waiting for Saturday to come already.

2pm and you are now getting ready , you are about to meet in a dinner date the mad on your dreams. You both agreed to meet at 5pm. You asked him to just meet in the restaurant where you had reservations with, to add extra effect and impact to your ever first dinner date. You can’t wait to see him get into the restaurant in his best attire. You always see Changkyun around but still you can’t help but wonder what will he be wearing later. Changkyun is always keen and particular in choosing the clothes he wears. Makes him really attractive. You keep on repeating how excited you are and to add up to your excitement. You are planning to confess again this time, in a more sincere way and in a less childish like. You hope this confession would reach Changkyun heart this time or at least move him. Correction guys, You love Changkyun so much , but it never happened that you begged for him to like you back, you just constantly remind him and sometimes bribing him. You laugh wickedly to yourself while staring at the silver chained bracelet that you bought him yesterday. It’s a really simple chained bracelet with his name engraved on it. You’ve given Changkyun so many gifts before but he didn’t like it , because he just don’t. But this time you’ve think really hard to pick this one, hoping he likes it. You’ve seen him wearing one before and it looks really good on him, made him look really manly and boyish at the same time. 100% boyfriend material.

Finally it’s 4pm and you’ve done your major preparation. You prepared extra this time, you exert effort to put on a little make up, you don’t usually do, it was a struggle really. You are a sneaker and jeans type of a girl but you settled will doll shoes and a cute yet casual dress this time. You want to look a little lady like today. Trying to show Changkyun that you are not as childish as what he thinks you are. 4:10pm You texted him “See yah later. J ” you settled with that because you don’t want to annoy him.  It was already 4:20 when your brother dropped you off the restaurant. He kissed you good bye and wished you luck on your “First Dinner Date”. Supporting isn’t he?? He is the best brother by the way.

Sanha greeted you right away the moment you got in the restaurant. He was the new part-timer you made friends with few days ago. You liked him a lot and become easily comfortable with him coz hell yeah the guy was as happy and as playful as you. Talk about being talkative too he is that 100%. You asked him how do you look like, how was your make up and dress and he just gave you a thumbs up. “He must be blind if he doesn’t find you really beautiful tonight.” He stated in an awe that made you blush a little that somewhat boosted your confidence. You’ve been nervous since Friday imagining about what will it be like when Changkyun sees you later.

5:30 you got a text from Changkyun that he will be a little late. You smiled at the text , thankful that he really has the intention of coming. “No worries, take your time.” You texted him back. You are doing your best to be consistent of not being annoying for today. “Take care on your way.” You sneak sending him another text which he didn’t replied. He must be driving already. 6:00  the restaurant started getting busy, Sanha asked you for how many already if you wanted to eat something else first or just anything. But of course you declined, you’re not hungry yet, you are more nervous and worried than hungry. 6:30 you started getting a little worried, wondering what’s taking him so long, the place is not that far from home. 7:00 you texted him where is he, asking him if everything was okay, it took him a while to text you back asking for a few minutes more. Your excitement started going down a hint of disappointment started bothering a part of your brain as you watch couples happily chatting and enjoying good food with each other. 7:30 you started to grow impatient and a little hungry and mad.  You feel like getting up and just leave the place, but thinking how hard it was to get a chance like this. You tried your best to think of happy things but it’s a mix emotion already, your expectation started failing and you grow a little frustrated thinking the time that should have been spent together is now wasted. 8:00 you felt heart broken and betrayed, you could no longer smile at Sanha every time he’s giving you a worried look. You started to feel so small and a little embarrassed, you started noticing other diners giving you the look. You honestly felt so pathetic for being stood up.  You just acted busy with your phone as your insides shuttered , your mind travelling a thousand miles, wondering maybe you expected too much. Thinking you wont be this hurt if you didn’t forget how Changkyun treated you most of the time. Few moments turns to hour of battling with your emotions, you felt like crying how people started vacating their seats and leaving the restaurants. Now you didn’t imagine your ideal and favorite place to have you first dinner date to be this lonely and empty. 9:00 your tear drops fell.

Changkyun’s POV 4:40 I left the house. I’m not really excited of what I’m just curious , I guess. I don’t even know why I agreed to have this little date with you in the first place. So I’ll just settled of you not letting it off if I say no.  5:00 I arrived at the restaurant,  your favorite restaurant. I saw you happily chatting with the waiter, who is just around your age. Which is not something new, you always talk to people wherever you go. You look really pretty in your pastel dress by the way. I was about to enter when Jooheon suddenly pulled me to Shownu’s car. You were so busy chatting with the boy to see me I guess.   I was so surprised to see the guys, I wasn’t expecting them around and as usual they started teasing me about being totally smitten by you which I always strongly deny and about them showing their full support, but before that we have to do some serious test. It was Jooheon and Wonho’s idea. I just hate it so much when people think ahead of me, as if they already know what will happen , as if they already know what I’m thinking or in short people deciding for me and you do that all the time. Same as how everyone keep on saying that I will soon fall for you. Family and friends keep pushing me to date you for real and I swore so many times already that it wont happen, we are just not compatible with each other. I don’t want to be engage in your oh so social life. I don’t want to be involved in your very flowery fairytales. You made people believe in the Changkyun your imaginations has created when you tell them stories.

That was the stupid reason why I went along with Wonho and Jooheon’s idea to make you wait a little. They’ll just have to see how long you can wait, given they know how impatient and bratty you are. I always act like I didn’t care about your feelings in front of my friends, I just want to prove them wrong about their assumptions. I was curious too, I know you very well, you grew up as a princess at home, a princess to your parents and 2 brothers, and even a princess to my parents who doesn’t have any daughter. I was curious how long can you wait, I was pretty sure too you won’t last and hour too. That’s too long already for someone like you who always get what she wants right away. 5:30 I texted you that I’ll be a little late but I was already there, watching you from a distance. You don’t seem to be bother yet, you have your little friend to keep you accompany anyway. The guys continue teasing me being jealous with the waiter guy or them making scenarios and jokes what will happened to me when we start dating for real. That annoyed me a lot while they were having fun. “Take care on your way.” You texted, I’d be a liar if I say I didn’t feel a little bad about what I’m doing but I can’t say no anymore. It’s like waving the white flag. 6:30 the guys started betting till what time can you wait. Wonho and Jooheon was so into it, while Minhyuk was moderating the bet asking the rest to participate. Hyungwon disinterested as usual and Kihyun was giving everyone a disapproving look. I saw him shaking his head, telling everyone we will regret what we are doing. 7:00 I stared at you as I read what you texted me. I started feeling bad seeing the changes of your expression, the way you pouted your lips and the way you furrow you eyebrows. I’ve read another message from you, I didn’t know what to reply anymore. I was staring at my phone until Jooheon took my phone and replied you to wait some more. I punched Jooheon for that, but honestly I felt like its me me who deserves to be punched right now. I’m so confused I don’t know what I’m feeling. I should be happy right now I was granted my payback for all the things you made me suffer, for all your dramas that I went through. But I don’t feel good at all, I felt worst , I hated myself.

8:00 I heard Jooheon, Minhyuk and Wonho getting really excited, as they saw you stand up and was about to leave. But I was surprised when you just stood there for a couple of minute looking at our direction before going back to your seat and acted busy with your phone. I got really nervous, I thought you’d see us , just to realized Shownu’s car is tinted. That time I wished you just left, I’d  wished you’d just leave. I felt my heart beats really fast when your eyes scanned the parking lot, you starred at Shownu’s car for God knows how long. I felt ashamed, I felt so embarrassed, it felt like I was caught red handed. For the first time, I felt so guilty for being mean to you. 9:00 Your tear drops fell and I felt pain I can’t explain as I saw the look in your eyes and the expression of your face. I heard everyone, went silent. “Game over” Hyungwon said with a sigh while Kihyun giving us the look as if he was saying “I told you, you’ll regret it.” And I was there paralyzed unable to move.

~End of Changkyun’s POV~

It was around 8:00 when you received an anonymous text telling you about the bet going on and just asking you to go home.  You didn’t believe at first, you can’t help it from poisoning your mind. You wanted to go home and just cry your heart out but you wanted to see Changkyun and hear it straight from him. You really love Changkyun so much, but you felt nothing but pain right now as you see him walk going to your seat. Part of you wished he would just reason out or lie perhaps but you just don’t know anymore which is better, coz all hurt the same. Your teary eyes never left his as he occupied the seat in front of you.

“You’re a little late.” You asked smiling while wiping your tears.

“Did you had fun with your little game?” You asked once more.

“I’m sorry” was the only thing you heard from him, he can’t even look straight at you.

You tried your best not to cry anymore but your tears just keep on streaming as you heard his answer and you’ve made everything is so clear to you now.

“No, It’s okay.. I’m sorry it took me a while to finally understand. I must be really stupid to wait to be hurt like this to understand how you really felt for me.” You stated, you saw him stared at you with confusion and regret in his face.

“ Don’t worry this will be the last time. I’ll stop fighting for your attention, I’ll stop texting you, I’ll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, I’ll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.”  You pleaded as you collected your things and walk going out the door when he held your wrist. “Don’t worry I won’t tell anyone, our families won’t know about this. And by the way, this was supposed to be yours, you can throw it if you don’t like it.” You said as you handed him the small box you’ve been dying to give him. 10:00pm  You gave up your first love. 10:00pm  He lost you for good.   A/N: T_T

[brendzybee]

Kabahan kana Saitama 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😭😭😭😭😭😭😂😂😂😂😂 #Changkkung #MonstaX #MonstaXIM #changkyun #MXChangkyun #MXMaknae