#my stroies

[sleepygreentea]

Me tryign to explain my stories to anything

[bayronkariya17]

the talk about fuck buddies

so me n my friend dayron was having a long talk about him thinking about him trying to get a fuck buddy. i had to get on him about it, i had to remind him that he did all the fun of having sex. he was missing that he loves sex and it ended him with two stds heartbreaks, n HIV. hes trying his best to change that he longer wants his needs to take over him. its not easy to tame the freak in u. im going though it as well all i did was had gay sex once to unleash the beast n let it sleep for a very long ass time. fuck buddies has change over the years. u don't really know the person even when u know them for years. the realtionship will change n both parties will develop feelings or one sided as well.the sex is good but u won't really want to know more about the person. i told dayron, just stop. i know u miss those days but u gotten take care of your health, you hiv poz. things change n you gotten get yourself under control. no fuck buddy for you cause your gonna want more outside the bedroom. no one can really stay in friends. when they sharing each other bodies n the your end up sharing your soul. fuck buddies are really meant for peolpe who single straight up or guys who are in open relationships. Couples are not meant to have fuck buddies, its cause turmoil between the two. unless your having a threesome or swinging with other couples but that does not count as FB. anyways, back to fb the sex is hot but there no common ground that the person is really your friend. just two guy sharing each other bodies.its just an hookup over n over till one of them is done staying in contact anytime.

its a fact, that its so hard to find someone to be an compatible fuck buddy. you do not look for one, it comes natural when it happens, nothing more or nothing less.

he game me the Samantha example (sex and the city). she doesn't really have fuck buddies, she only try guys onces cause she an try sexual. she did had guys more than once but she cut them off the third time so she really had her fun with no hard feelings.

i don't see myself having a fuck buddy cuse i know im gonna lust after the guy and think i wanna to be more. in the mind, its gonna be fun but i only gonna do u once for my experience n cut u off. i only do the guy once . if its more than there something more than sharing each other bodies but im in love n im getting balance to be a lover and not an sex crazy. i love sex but im not in love with sex.. im in love with someone who is an human being and that more powerful then my selfish needs.

i won't hookup till next year in spring or summer..

after our talk, he say im right and ask me another question, why does sex have to be so difficult for everything that comes with an price. i answer him cuse everything has price and u must find balance otherwise, your back to were you are. just because your not having sex doesn't mean you loose your edge, you got bigger things to focus and just use your porn and your two hands. your hiv poz and now you gotten do yourself an favor n grow up to protect yourself n focus on your goal

he thank me and wanted to talk more but i rather hang up n call it a night.

[bayronkariya17]

Today is Fuck My Life Day.

I'm a good person who know life isn't fair, but what happens when all the good in my life being a pain in the ass to work for it in order to keep. I know I have no job (which I'm working on getting one)  and not in school (fuck im gonna go back by the end of this year).

Today I'm like FUCK EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE!!!! I'm tried of working to keep the good in my life. I need a break from everything. Fuck I feel like I wanna RUN AWAY, but that not gonna solve my issues.  

I'm already dealing with the emotional rebuilding my walls up and I know its gonna take time to fitful it to 100% up.I'm having trust issues with random people n now I'm getting upset over things that I barely don't get upset about. Dealing with other people issues.......... UGH!!!

I just wish someone Just don't give up on me and slap the shit out me and force me to tell them what going on with me.  As usual, no has done that. :( 

I just fucking wish that someone can save me because I feel like im dying inside bit by bit. In the end, I gotten save myself.

[bayronkariya17]

Trying to catch me, its like catching a fucking moon.

Ok....I'm gonna get this straight, I don't like when guys try to clam me as a fucking prize. Some guys don't know how to take "NO" for an answer. I'm like a fucking legend Pokemon who runs free into your life and once u try to catch me I'm gone. I like the chase as long it doesn't get bored otherwise Ill shut it down and say it was fun while it lasted now fuck off. I tell them that I'm not interesting to start dating and I have my reason why, which I don't tell them why. The point is stop trying to get me like I'm yours. I don't know, i don't trust you., the only reason your into me because you fallin for me so fast like a white girl falling for Tyle Lauther base on his looks and acting careers. Its a fight but I do have a choice to cut you out of my life. Grow up or get the fuck out of my life cause u need to learn how to flirt a different way. The way your doing it is such a high school technique.