summary: lately something in your an clarks relationship has changed, hes always been so caring and loving, and since youd gotten comfortable around each other he was admittedly a physically affectionate person. but in the last few weeks his been distant, emotionally and physically, what for?
word count: 1.2k
warnings: mentions of bed breaking during sex, lying, i think thats it? tbh i hate this but its all ive got.
[ masterlist ]
"alright sweets im heading to work," clark called from the front door, "love ya!"
you tried to make it to the door to steal a kiss before he left, only to be left standing alone by the time you get there.
clark NEVER left without his goodbye kiss.
standing there with a frown on your face you rack your brain for reasons and excuses as to why he left without one. was he running late? turning to look at the clock on the stove you see he left early. okay, well maybe he read the clock wrong.
was he mad at you? he didnt sound upset, nothing less than his usual self all morning.
trying not to let it get to you, you go on with your morning. its your day off so naturally youre ticking things off of your to do list. your laundry, tidying up, making whatever doctor appointment you need to go to. whatever adult things you need to get on with.
including grabbing some groceries. naturally, when you get home and start to put them away you see clark left his lunch at home.
well shit. he probably needs that, doesnt he?
might as well bring him his lunch... and it magically gives you an opportunity to talk to him about this morning.
next thing you know, youre walking through the elevator of the daily planet with clarks lunch in your hands.
clark, ever attentive immediately clocks your presence. he is always listening for your heartbeat after all.
quickly stepping out of his cubicle he makes a beeline for you, "honey what are you doing here? did you try to call me?"
"what? no im sorry- should i have called? you just forgot your lunch at home i just figured id bring it to you," you leaned in to kiss him, just a small peck, to which he returned with did ease your mind a bit, "and you forget your goodbye kiss."
"awe thank you sweets," he smiled at you so sweetly it almost made you forget what you wanted to talk about. "i was just gonna grab something from the deli next door."
"well are you going to take your lunch soon? maybe i could eat with you if you have time?"
"i was actually gonna eat while i work, im sorry honey. maybe another day? im just really deep into an article i dont wanna lose the roll im on."
feeling a little defeated and needy you cant help but push.
"cmon clark i miss you! besides it my day off i wouldnt be able to until next week and im already here. please?"
clark was always one to give in, it didnt take much. he was a people pleaser at heart and he wanted to please you most of all. that was part of the problem.
looking at the clock he turns back with a reluctant sigh, "i guess i can make it work. im all yours sweets let me just grab my bag okay? did you bring something to eat too?"
you nodded watching him grab his things from his desk, a small smile on your face from victory.
"i did yea, i know i know it was a bit presumptuous but i was hopeful!"
all clark could do was laugh and follow you to the break room. of course you knew what he was going to say, you know him better than just about anyone.
"and i have to admit, i was kind of hoping to talk to you about something."
now that, made clark concerned.
"is everything okay?"
sitting down across from clark you nod, trying to ease his worry but you knew this wasnt going to be an easy conversation. you hated having to do it at his workplace at all but you werent sure if youd be able to talk to him at all. seizing the moment and all.
"yea, yea i mean i just... i dont know youve been kind of distant lately. and i dont mean to sound clingy and needy but ive noticed. youre not home as much, and when you are it feels like you wouldnt touch me with a 20 foot pole! and im not trying to complain i guess im just worried. did i do something? are you not happy?"
clark was flabbergasted.
how could you think that? how could you think he loves you any less? maybe because hes been too afraid to talk about what is actually bothering him.
"oh sweets... im sorry. god im so-" he ran a hand over his face trying to pull the words together. after all hed been avoiding this conversation for a week or two, "im so sorry. i promise you im very happy in our relationship, you did absolutely nothing wrong. this is my fault i shouldve told you-"
"what?" you interrupted, "shoulve told me what?"
he looked so tense, so uncomfortable it only worried you moe.
"okay well... when we were... busy the other night and the thing happened-"
that brought a blush to your cheeks. "you mean when we broke the bed?" the giggles that racked out of you were completely involuntary. "yea i remember that vaguely-"
clarks cheeks were an even deeper shade of red than yours.
"right... that. well truthfully it... it scared me. i totally lost control and you were lucky that you werent hurt. or that i didnt hurt you. and the thought of that happening again," he sighed, his breath was almost shaky like it pained him to even talk about it.
"honey, are you saying you left without a kiss goodbye the morning all cause youve afraid of hurting me?"
he looked down at his hands with an ashamed nod.
"i shouldve told you its been bothering me, im really sorry."
"so all of this has been some... some messed up challenge on your self restraint?" you chuckled softly, "clark thats kind of adorable."
that got his attention back, looking at you confused, "what? no you should be upset with me. i lied to you. ive treated you terribly-"
"baby i would hardly describe our relationship as terrible. you didnt lie to me you just withheld your feelings. which is an easy fix! we can work on being more open with each other. but you were just trying to be considerate. just in your own warped little way."
"so youre not upset with me?"
"not at all, i mean i dont really understand why you didnt just tell me but you were just working on your willpower," you laughed reaching over to squeeze his hand, "youre a good boyfriend clark. i know youd never hurt me."
once his blue eyes were back on you they melted in an instant. he pulled your chair closer to his with a soft smile before kissing your cheek and wrapping an arm around the back of the chair.
"youve got a lot of faith in me you know. and high standards, im far from perfect."
"i didnt say perfect- you still dont turn your clothes right side out before putting them in the laundry hamper."
that got a laugh out of him.
"ill take what i can get, so were okay now?"
you nodded leaning in to kiss him, not too passionately. just enough to say i love you and reassure him that everything is okay. that at the end of the day you still trusted him with your life and that will never change.
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Credible fraud accusation: Not rumors or gossip, but an accusation brought through appropriate legal channels of actual fraud on the part of a team/driver/principal.
Delay due to IT fail: An IT disaster of some kind (like an internet or service outage) results in a session or race being delayed.
Driver announces engagement, marriage, or pregnancy: This is what it says on the tin but I did want to clarify, this must be during the season, so you can't count Alex and Lily's engagement.
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