Sep 13, 2019
Bible reading and Meditation: 2 Corinthians 8
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Bible reading and Meditation: 2 Corinthians 8
I miss my boyfriend.
I know where I went wrong with him. I started the whole thing off with sex. I don’t mean that in the way with sleeping with someone on the second date can be a bad lead in. I mean, there has been no real date. It’s only been sex. And I also know that there won’t be a relationship with this guy, even if I want the opportunity. I’m not a complete idiot. If he wanted to see me outside of HIS bedroom, he would. Simple as that.
I don't know what to think
can I trust you? sometimes I feel like you really like me, and sometimes it's like you don't care at all. Ok, I don't text you often, but it's not because I don't want to, actualy I'm scared to annoyed you.so you're always the one who started the conversation... I don't know what to feel about you, I want you so badly, but I'm scared to be hurt, again.
You asked me if I had sex with someone else, and you were happy that I didn't,... I don't know what are you thinking. Why did you ask me this? I mean, we are not together together. If I want to have sex with someones else, its my problem, uh?
We never had a date, a real date, we just playing at your apartment, killing some time, having sex, and that's it.
Damn, I want you to want me, for real.
bye
En t'idéalisant, j'ai construis des souvenirs qui n'ont jamais réellement existé. Quand je me suis aperçue que tout ça n'étais que le fruit de mon imagination, je me suis rendue compte à quel point je t'avais surestimer et a quel point tu avais pu me dénigrer. Alors si tu n'as pas besoin de moi, ce n'est pas grave. Je n'ai pas besoin de toi pour vivre.
J'aurais du, j'aurais du te dire à quel point tu es important pour moi, à quel point j'étais toute chose près de toi. Mais j'ai eu peur, je me disais que tu ne ressentais pas la même chose, que je n'étais qu'une amie de plus. Rien d'autre. Maintenant tu es en couple avec cette fille parfaite, au corps parfait, une fille avec trop de talent... cette fille que je ne peux rivaliser. Je n'ai jamais eu de regret tu sais, jamais jusqu'au jours où tu m'as avoué qu'avant cette petite copine parfaite tu ressentais quelque chose pour moi, mais que toi aussi tu avais peur de me le dire... J'aurais du te le dire, moi. Peut être qu'aujourd'hui on serait ensemble, peut être qu'aujourd'hui j'aurais pu être heureuse.