The "Forest Keeper", or "The Giant" as myself and my crew members generally call them, is a terrifying creature indeed.
It is best to avoid these creatures, as our weapons fail to do any observable damage to it. Shovels (unsurprisingly) have no effect on its tough outer skin, which I would compare to the thick bark of an ancient tree.
Stun grenades work in a pinch, but only as a means of buying a few extra seconds of escape. If timed correctly, one of these flashbangs can be used to rescue a captured crewmate from what would otherwise be certain death.
Without a stun grenade, anyone unfortunate enough to be caught by one of these creatures is beyond means of saving. All that awaits will be a quick, but undoubtedly excruciating death; at least if the massive cloud of blood and the agonized wails are anything to go off of.
One would have to be not only incredibly desperate, but insanely foolish to try and make a meal of one of these creatures. But suffice to say, after having found myself stranded on hostile alien moons so many times... I have found myself in the exact right situation to try and take the risk.
I was fortunate enough to find one of these creatures either dead, or near dead. I was also fortunate enough to not be found by whatever it was that had brought this behemoth to its end. No doubt, whatever it was that had the might to bring one of these creatures down would have had no trouble using me as an appetizer, or as an after dinner mint.
When I found the Giant, it appeared to be critically wounded. I am unsure if it was legitimately dead, or if I merely acted as a scavenger which crept in to opportunistically devour the near dead creature.
Its thick hide had been cracked and splintered. There were multiple spots along its body where the thick outer skin had been completely split open, seemingly by some sort of crushing force.
Thick, viscous blood better comparable to drying tree sap pooled from these many open wounds. It had the look and feel of molasses, and was equally as bitter and sweet when I gave it a tentative taste.
The flesh inside those open wounds was pale and off-white. Considering the overall look and texture of the outside of the creature, I expected it to behave much like the inner pulp that hides behind the bark of a tree. But as I scraped the meat with the edge of a sharp rock, I found that it was nothing like that at all.
The inner flesh of a Giant is surprisingly soft. At least when compared to the hard bark that makes up its outer shell. I would compare it to the flesh of a peach; firm and juicy, but capable of being crushed by hand.
I gathered as much of the strange flesh as I could manage.
Unlike the other scavengers of that hostile world, I was not prepared for what might happen if some other predator happened by to lay claim to the body. With my limited supplies, I only managed to collect a couple pounds "meat", though I question if the substance I went on to consume could even be classified as such.
With my spoils in hand, I hastily made my way back to my makeshift shelter in the nearest facility. It was there that my experiments began.
I tried the meat raw first.
The bitter-sweetness of the blood carried over into the meat, but only until it was cleaned and soaked in water to do away with the unpleasant taste.
Once cleaned, the flesh of the Giant was... Surprisingly bland. There was a slight nuttiness to it, but outside of that my first impression of the meat was incredibly underwhelming.
The raw meat had more going for it in terms of texture than it did anything else. It reminded me of dried apple slices, in a way. Soft on the very outside with a firmer, more crisp center that had a faint chew to it.
I boiled, grilled, and smoked what remained, and I did so in equal portions. All of which I went on to consume over the following few days as I anxiously awaited the return of my crew.
The meat proved equally as bland when boiled, but took on a much softer texture. I'd compare the texture of the boiled Giant meat to that of a soft-boiled egg. It was almost gelatinous. If I had just had some salt or some other means of adding flavor, it would have made for a pleasant meal.
When grilled, the meat somehow firmed up and became even more chewy. Any hint of "crunch" or crispness that it might have had completely disappeared once cooked over a flame. I cannot even compare the texture to that of any other food that I have consumed, it changed so drastically.
The closest that I could possibly compare it to is what I know of more exotic meats like Octopus or Squid, but due to my low status aboard the colony, I cannot even verify how accurate of a comparison this might be.
Outside of the baffling (but not all that unpleasant) texture, the meat actually developed a flavor! There was a faint smokiness from being cooked over a fire, and the previously established nutty notes of the flesh became far more pronounced.
If I had to compare to a specific type of nut, I would say that grilled Giant meat tastes very similar to cashews. Even without the luxury of seasoning, it made for a surprisingly pleasant meal!
As for the smoked meat... Well. It would strongly advise that anyone else who happens to acquire Giant meat avoids repeating my mistake. When smoked, the meat takes on a texture best compared to aged shoe leather. Not only was it incredibly difficult to chew, but it sucked all moisture from my mouth with each small bite that I managed to take.
The smoky taste of the smoked meat was also overwhelming, to the point that I suspect that the taste of my cooking ashes might have been more appealing by comparison.
Had I the supplies and the means... Maybe the smoked giant flesh might have made for a better ingredient in a soup or a stew. But alas, that was my first, and thus far my only opportunity to experiment with such an unusual source of food.
In the even that I am given a second or even a third opportunity, I will happily update my notes and develop better recipes for my comrades to make use of. In the meantime... Well. The recipes can be found below.
FOREST KEEPER RECIPES:
Raw:
Raw Giant flesh appears to be perfectly safe to eat if consumed fresh.
Soak for at least an hour in cold, clean water first to remove the bitterness of the blood The pat dry and chop into bite sized pieces. Can be eaten as is, but if available, add a sprinkle of salt and pepper to vastly improve the otherwise bland flavor.
Do not eat raw if the flesh has darkened, or if it has taken on a strange smell. This is most likely a sign of the meat having become infested with bacteria, and will undoubtedly lead to food poisoning. Which may lead to death.
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Boiled (or as a soup):
First soak the acquired meat in cold water for at least an hour to remove the bitterness of the blood. Throw out and replace the tainted water, then remove the meat and cut it into bite size cubes.
Return the cubes of meat to the cooking vessel and bring to a heavy boil. Cook until the water takes on a milky hue and the meat develops a gelatinous texture. Consume as is, or eat alongside the milky broth for a very bland soup.
If the luxury is available, enhance the flavor of the meat (or soup) with salt. Adding any available wild grain, herb, or vegetable will not only make for a more filling meal, but it will greatly improve the overall flavor.
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Grilled:
First soak the meat in cold water for at least an hour. Then remove and pat dry, before cutting into thin strips. Skewer the strips or wrap them around the cooking implement of choice.
Arrange the prepped meat over an open flame, preferably away from any drifting smoke to prevent the smoky flavor from getting too intense. Bring the meat close enough to feel the intensity of the heat without risking direct contact with the flames.
Cook for around 7 minutes, or until the flesh has visibly firmed up (it will shrink) and developed a slight char. Perfectly palatable as is, but could likely be improved with salt if such a luxury is available.
(I personally consider this the best means of preparation. Both in terms of texture and flavor.)
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Smoked:
Ill-advised, but suitable as a means of preserving the meat in the event of an emergency....
First soak the meat in cold water for at least an hour. Then remove and pat dry, before cutting into thin strips. The thinner the better, as the final product will be incredibly tough and difficult to chew.
Hang the strips of meat over a prepared stick over a low flame. Allow the heat of the flame and the smoke of the wood to slowly cook and dry the meat over the course of a few hours; at least 6, and as many as 12. The resulting meat will be very tough and very dry, but will keep for weeks without refrigeration.
Eating these strips of smoked meat is not advised. Instead, mix into water to rehydrate the meat and boil to make for a weak but very smoky soup.
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ما توقعت إن الجوارب ممكن تكون السبب في راحتي اليومية، لكن لما جربت شراب نانو الفضة من "رافة" حسيت كأني مشيت على سحابة.
أعاني من تعرق مستمر والروائح اللي ما ترحم، خاصة بعد الدوام أو التمارين. لكن هالجوارب حرفيًا أنقذتني. مصنوعة بتقنية نانو الفضة، اللي تقضي على البكتيريا المسببة للروائح، وتعطي إحساس بالانتعاش يدوم طول اليوم!
🌬️ no more sweaty feet
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🖤 just soft, fresh, stylish socks
This is a non-canon fruit created specifically for the Lethal Company AU, where all of these culinary notes and recipes come from. It is also specifically found on "Mania", a moon which is specific to the AU :3
Ayala's Culinary Notes:
If you should happen to find yourself roaming the surface of Mania on a clear, sunny day, be on the lookout for a stocky tree with widely outstretched branches.
If you are lucky, you will stumble across a rare delight. One which can make the daily struggles feel just a little less intense, should you take the time to enjoy its blessing.
These trees are few and far between, and they are easy to overlook in a rush. They can easily blend into the surrounding landscape. Especially if you happen to have landed on a dryer portion of the moon. Their bark is bitter brown and their leaves a sickly looking green, but the fruit that they produce is wonderful nonetheless.
They quite resemble peaches. Their pink skin is cloaked with a peculiar fuzz that I find surprisingly pleasant to the touch. It makes them easier to hold onto when it comes time to pluck them from the thick stems that support their hefty weight.
These pretty pink fruit may be surrounded by a few unripe sisters. Their bodies will be smaller and harder, and their skin will be a deep ruby red.
When bitten into, you'll reveal a beautiful amber flesh, which is rich in juice. When you taste it, you will find the sweetness of the fruit subdued, and almost like a distant afterthought to the more distinct peppery notes.
The Pepper-peach is sweet and spicy. Comparable to fresh pepper berries, but with a less intense peppery bite to them. The ratio of sweet to spice differs slightly from tree to tree, but I have found than in most cases, the fruit will be significantly more spicy than it is sweet.
When eaten raw, they make for a pleasant, peppery snack. But they can be made into jam, grilled, and even added to meat based dishes in order to add an extra boost of flavor.
I have spent a lot of time learning how to best utilize this fruit. To this day I can recall the tentative hope that I felt upon discovering the tree. Hope that the constant gnawing of my stomach could be safely satiated by these familiar, and yet completely alien fruit that I had found.
I gathered as many as I could carry. And then my first hesitant experiments began.
I first left the fruit out to be sampled by the wildlife. After all, the native fauna would know best if these fruit happened to contain any toxins.
Not one beast shied away from the fruit. From the circuit bees to the manticoli, down to the Bracken that I often found myself sharping space with. Anything that was given the opportunity to eat this strange new fruit happily seized it.
While that revelation was encouraging, I knew that I still needed to be cautious. If the fruit was poisonous, then the based case scenario was that I would get some stomach trouble when I dared to take that first bite. In the worst case scenario, the fruit might prove so toxic to humans that it would kill me in a horrific fashion.
I will not lie. My first response to the peppery taste was fear. The unexpected flavor and the tingling feeling that it left on my tongue led me to believe that I was having a mild allergic reaction, or that the fruit was indeed poisonous. But as the hours ticked by and I experienced no complications, I allowed myself a few additional bites to see if anything might change.
Needless to say, I went through a lot of trial and error that ultimately did not need to happen. But it is always better to err on the side of caution. One wrong move, and what you think is a tasty meal might wind up being you last. And those final hours will likely be spent in an intense amount of pain, likely while you spray various bodily fluids out of any available orifice...
Anyways. These notes exist so that anyone with access to them will know what I have tried. Be it a success or a failure. Not everything that I have eaten has been edible. Not everything that seems unassuming has been safe. My hardships exist to make your survival easier. And if I cannot pull off any greater feat, I am content to know that my lineage helps to make things just a little easier for anyone else who walks a mile in my shoes.
While I do not have a lot of recipes that primarily feature the Pepper-Peach as a central ingredient... That is because I have found that they are best in these recipes, or otherwise used as a condiment. One of these recipes specifically details how to turn this fruit into a spice, which you can then use to season your food.
PEPPER-PEACH RECIPES:
Grilled Pepper-Peach:
Ingredients: Pepper-Peaches, Red Honey, Salt (optional)
Clean and peel your peaches (the skin does not react well to heat and easily burns, so it must be removed). Cut each peach into quarters, then cut each quarter in half to get 8 even slices.
If you have salt, sprinkle each slice with salt. Then glaze each peach slice with some fresh honey.
Place each slice cut side down atop a hot metal surface, over low embers.
Gently cook each slice, 2-3 minutes on each side or until the honey just barely begins to caramelize.
Remove from heat and allow to cool slightly. Then enjoy! These peaches will be soft and fragrant, with intense sweet and peppery flavors that coat the palate.
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Pepper-Peach Stew:
Ingredients: 2 Pepper-Peaches, 1/2 pound any Meat, 1 cup any vegetable (optional), and 1/2 cup any grain (optional), 2-4 cups water (or milk)
Take your meat and chop it into small chunks. Then brown those chunks in a shallow (preferably deep if I'm being honest) vessel, over a low flame. Stir rarely to allow a nice crust to form on the meat and on the bottom of the cooking implement.
Thoroughly clean your peaches. Then quarter them, and cut each section into 4 slices. Cut each of those slices in half. Add them directly to the meat and/or vegetables. Do not mix. This will reduce the risk of burning the skins while you prep the other ingredients, if you have them.
Clean and chop your vegetables into bite sized pieces, if you happen to have them. And if you are able to add grain, rinse the grain with cold water. Add whichever you have to the pot. If you have neither, ignore this step.
Add water to your cooking vessel. 2-4 cups, or until you half fill the dish. If you happen to have milk, you can use it entirely in place of water, or in a 50/50 ratio for a less thick broth. Bring to a nice, even simmer while stirring regularly to assure that you get all the tasty bits off of the bottom of the dish.
Allow to simmer for 20 to 30 minutes, stirring every so often to prevent burning. Then remove from heat.
Allow to cool for 10 minutes. Then enjoy.
This savory stew has a wonderful kick from the Pepper-Peaches, and a deep flavor due to the browned meat. Even if the dish only contains these two base elements, you are in for a flavorful meal that is sure to leave you full and satisfied. The inclusion of vegetables and grains will only make it more filling while adding to the range of textures and flavors.
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Pepper-Peach Jam:
Ingredients: Pepper-Peaches, Red Honey
Thoroughly clean then peel your peaches, and finely chop the flesh. Combine with honey in a shallow cooking vessel, and cook.
Cook and cook until the majority of the moisture evaporates and you are left with a thick, amber sauce that clings to the back of a spoon (or whatever else it is that you happen to be using to cook).
Pour mixtures into a thoroughly cleaned jar with a lid and seal, then allow to cool. You will know that you have jarred your jam correctly when you hear the lid pop; it means that you have created an airtight seal that will keep all external contaminants out of the food.
In terms of ratio, you'll want to use at least 1/4 cup of honey per every 1/2 cup of fruit used. And if you have the ability, upwards of 1/2 cup honey per 1/2 cup fruit. This is less to add to the sweetness and more to reduce the risk of mold once the jam is made. More sugar + less water = no mold!
Anyways. This jam has an incredibly sweet start with an intense, peppery finish that leaves the tongue tingling. It can be eaten as is, or used in any recipes where jam is a suitable ingredient.
You can also smear it on rocks (or just dump some on the ground) to lure Circuit Bees away from their hive. But be warned - once the honey has been gobbled up and they go looking for their hive, they will immediately get hostile.
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Dried Pepper-Peach:
Ingredients: Pepper-Peaches
Wash and peel your pepper peaches. Then quarter them, and quarter each of the four segments. Your goal is to get the fruit nice and thin, so that it will better dry and pulverize.
Once your peaches are sliced, allow them to sit for 20 minutes so that excess moister can be drawn out by the open air.
While the peaches drain, prepare your drying area. It needs to be two pieces of metal with multiple tiny holes, which will allow idea air flow and prevent moisture from building up.
Once the peaches have had time to drain, arrange the slices on your bottom layer of metal. Then sandwich the peaches with the top sheet.
You may apply a weight on top to better flatten the peaches, so long as the object in question will not excessively inhibit air flow.
Place your makeshift drying rack over low embers, and allow the heat to slowly cook and dry them.
This process can take anywhere from 12 hours to a day. It will always be best to cook them for longer if you can, as the goal is to completely remove any moisture that might be found in the fruit.
These dried peaches are not meant to be eaten directly. Once dried, their peppery flavor becomes incredibly intense and unappetizing. But if these dried slices are ground into a powder, then that powder may be mixed into any food that you feel will require a potent, peppery taste (and a kick of heat).
Once they are dried, unless you happen to have some sort of zester at hand (and if you do, damn. I'm jealous), you are going to need to grind them up by hand. Which is easier said than done. Because if you do not have a proper pestle and mortar (I find myself fortunate enough to have gotten one), you are going to need to use rocks and metal.
I have no real instructions for how to do that. Just crush the peaches, and then crush them some more, until you're left with a very fine powder.
This powder can be stored in glass containers or in paper packages. Use it whenever you find yourself in need of an emergency flavor boost.
Or use it as makeshift itching powder. This fine dust irritates the tongue, eyes, and nose. So it can be used to deter everything from the blind dogs to the hoarding bugs. Maybe even the giants, if you happen to be brave enough to test that theory.
— — — — — — — — — — — —
Pepper-Peach and Cream:
Ingredients: Pepper-Peach, Milk, Honey
Clean and peel your peach (or peaches). Quarter and slice. Then you can either finely chop those slices, or mash them up.
Once that is done, combine with milk and honey, then enjoy. This makes for a sweet and creamy dish that has a faint peppery kick, as the milk actually counteracts the majority of the heat.
I use a ratio of 1/2 cup milk and 2 tablespoons honey for every peach that I have included in the dish.
@xnanosilverx I'll be doing the bee hives first on this file, and will do a random fruit (from a random moon) on a separate one.
Ayala's Culinary Notes:
Circuit Bees. Or Red Bees, as some would call them. A semi-regular encounter that can be had on multiple planets throughout the Thistle Nebula. One which is equal parts painful and anxiety inducing, thanks to insect's elaborate means of self defense.
These hyper-aggressive bugs generate strong electrical charges, which they will use both as a means of crippling prey, and disarming perceived threats.
These electrical charges can reach a volt count numbering as high as three hundred. A human will generally die after being exposed to around 100 volts of electricity. Meaning that virtually every encounter with a hive of Circuit bees doubles as a brush with death.
There was once a time where I too felt the nauseating sense of dread pool in the pit of my stomach whenever I heard the tell-tale buzzing of these tiny creatures. But after having spent so much time learning to understand them and how they work, I have gained something of an appreciation for them. So much so that I am now able to approach most hives without fear, for the sake of collection and relocation.
Circuit bees are predatory insects which double as pollinators. They venture out in groups to gather nectar and to hunt other invertebrates; both of which are used in the creation of red honey. This honey acts as the primary food supply for the colony during times of scarcity, and as such, must be fiercely protected in order to assure the future of the hive.
They build their hives on the ground, rather than on trees. This is likely a means of preventing electrical fires, as the bees also generally prefer to build their hive a certain distance away from plant life. It would be hard to keep a colony alive if it burnt its home down every time it became agitated, now wouldn't it?
The downside to this tactic is that it leaves the hive particularly exposed to predators. Which means that the honey, and more importantly, the Queen and her brood are at regular risk of predation.
This has caused the Circuit bees to develop the most intense Napoleon Complex known to man. They will ruthlessly attack any perceived threat, no matter the size. All for the sake of protecting their food supply and their next generation of workers.
However, despite the aggressive disposition of the bees, they are surprisingly easy to domesticate - so long as you're willing to take a few risks.
The process itself is simple on paper. It requires you to take possession of a hive and completely separate it from the colony.
Once you have done this, time is of the essence. The swarm will be on the lookout for their hive, and your goal is not to completely remove it from the planet.
Your goal is relocate the hive to a more preferable location for easy access in the future. You will preferably place the hive in a more isolated location, away from water or any potentially flammable material. I would recommend putting the hive on top of a rock to reduce the risk of accidental current exposure.
Once that is done, the next step is to find the Queen (which should be easy to spot, as the only other adult bees on the hive will be the male drones) so that you can dispatch her. You must pluck her from the hive and crush her, preferably with your hands, so that you may then cover yourself in her royal pheromones.
This will reduce the colony aggression towards you for the next 72 hours, which will make them significantly easier to tame.
Once the Queen has been dispatched, immediately place some distance between yourself and the hive and wait for the colony to track it down. Then wait for the angry buzzing of the bees to dull into more of an idle hum. You will know that the colony has calmed down when you can no longer hear the tell-tale electrical discharges of their agitated state.
Once the hive is calm, slowly approach while gently waving your hands in front of your body. The swarm will set out towards you, but so long as you remain calm and do not make any sudden movements, you are unlikely to be attacked; because you smell like the now dead queen.
For the next 72 hours, you will need to keep yourself around the hive to get the current batch of workers used to your presence. The bees will come and go in search of food. They will swarm you frequently at first, but as the scent of the queen fades, this will become less frequent. And by the time that protective perfume is completely gone, the hive will have become accustomed to your presence, thus making it relatively safe for you to be around.
It will take another 10 days for you to be completely in the clear, though. That is roughly how long it will take for a new Queen to be hatched. And this new Queen, which has grown up accustomed to your presence and to your unique scent, will go on to sire a new generation of workers that will have absolutely 0 issues with you. So be sure to spend as much time as possible around your hive.
I'd recommend leaving articles of clothing around the hive whenever they need to be away. This will at least keep them familiar with your scent whenever you cannot be physically there. And because bees are incredibly reliant on scent to tell friend from foe, this will be your best shot at becoming a part of the colony in the long term.
If you have completed this process correctly, then congratulations! You now have unlimited access to your own colony of Circuit Bees! Which on its own, does not sound like much. At least until you realize that these bees, if in the right location and properly looked after, will go on to create absolutely massive hives that produce literal gallons of honey each week. Plenty of which you will be able to help yourself too (just be sure not to take too much, or else you'll risk hurting your hive).
Sounds like a lot of effort just for some honey, right?
Wrong! You also gain access to plump bee larvae; which taste a lot better than you'd think. But the honey itself really is worth the effort, as it is rich in essential electrolytes, high in sugar, and laced with a substance that I can only compare to non-caffeinated caffeine.
In other words, the honey itself is a healthy alternative to energy drinks. And when you work in a field that requires you to regularly run for your life... Yeah. That honey can be a life saver. And it tastes pretty damn good!
Anyways! Onto the recipes! That's all you really bother reading my notes for, isn't it? To see what sort of crazy shit I've gotten up to while trying to survive my frequent bouts of isolation on these hazardous rocks. And to figure out how my experiences can be of use to you.
Update: Do not attempt to eat the adult bees. Adult bees are inedible and let off an incredibly painful charge when bitten into, which will cause intense migraines and swelling of the tongue and/or throat...
CIRCUIT BEE & RED HONEY RECIPES:
Honeycomb:
Ingredients: Honeycomb from a Circuit Bee hive
Quick Note: Best if taken from a mature hive which has grown to massive size (these hives can get quite large and are capable of supporting hundreds of thousands of bees).
Scour the hive in search of comb which is free of brood; the bees store their honey and their larvae in different sections of the hive.
Once you have found a section that is stocked with honey, take a sharp instrument (a sharp stone will work, but a knife works best) and carefully cut out a small section of the hive; roughly 4 x 4 inches in shape. Repeat as many times as you wish, just be mindful not to take too much, as you do not want to inhibit the bees ability to tend to their needs.
Once the honeycomb is collected, it is perfectly fine to eat as is. The honey is very sweet with fruity undertones (similar to cherries and pomegranate). It is rich in antioxidants and electrolytes, and contains a substance similar to caffeine. The comb itself has a pleasantly crisp texture, but does not have much taste in this state. As is, the raw honeycomb will make for a pleasant energy boost.
However, if you would like to bring out the hidden potential of the waxy comb, the best course of action is to cook it over an indirect flame.
If you happen to have a cookie tin or a piece of sheet metal on hand, station that a couple of feet above a low fire and allow the metal to heat up. Once the metal is good and hot (you can test it with a few drops of water. Listen for a good sizzle), carefully place your squares of honeycomb on top.
The sugar in the honeycomb will immediately begin to caramelize.
Allow the honeycomb to cook for two minutes, then flip and repeat the process; for a total cooking time of four minutes. Then remove from heat (you will preferably remove the honeycomb from the hot metal entirely).
Allow to cool for at least two minutes, and then dig in. The grilled honeycomb is best eaten while warm and gooey!
You will find that the honey has lost most of its excess moisture due to the heat, which will give it a slightly chewy, almost gummy texture. And thanks to some sort of chemical reaction from the caramelized sugars from the heat, the true flavor of the honeycomb has come out!
I find that it tastes like toasted pecans. And combined with the sweetness of the honey, this grilled honeycomb tastes almost exactly like honey roasted pecans. The only difference is the texture.
— — — — — — — — — — — —
Energy Tonic:
Ingredients: Red Honey, Water
This is a very simple recipe for which I don't have any exact proportions, but I do have a general rule of thumb.
Combine 2 parts water per every 1 part Red Honey. This creates a sweet, vaguely fruity beverage that doubles as a simple energy drink.
The honey itself can be easily collected with nothing but a blunt instrument and some sort of a shallow vessel. Getting the honey into you water container might be a little messy, but honestly, it will be worth it.
— — — — — — — — — — — —
Circuit Bee Larvae:
Ingredients: Circuit Bee Larvae. Preferably plump, and days away from pupating.
Alright. We're getting into the potentially disgusting territory. And honestly? As far as my culinary adventures have gone, this one has had one of the more surprisingly pleasant endings. I can definitely see why such a "recipe" might not work for everyone, but it isn't horrible and it'll get you what you need in a pinch.
Scour your Circuit Bee hive to find where the brood are stored. Then look for the largest, plumpest of the larvae. The ones that practically fill the entirety of their individual combs. They will be pale white in color, with little pink heads. Ignore any which appear to be developing a black stripe along their bodies, as these larvae are on the very brink of pupating and are currently full of feces.
Depending on the size of your hive, you may only be able to take a handful of these walnut sized grubs. But from the larger hives, you can realistically get away with taking a few dozen at a time. Especially if you're trying to keep the overall size of the hive at a reasonable level.
Once you have the larvae, you have two options.
You can eat them raw, or you can cook them. Each option comes with its ups and downs, but for the more faint of heart, I would have to strongly recommend cooking the larvae, as this vastly improves their otherwise unpleasant texture.
If you're content to brave eating the larvae raw, then do just that. There is no special preparation that must be done. Just pop them one at a time into your mouth.
The raw larvae have a texture akin to a fried mushroom; soft and squishy. They will burst in your mouth and release a rush of honey, which makes the otherwise unpleasant experience more bearable. Their bodies are also soft enough that you can just crush them with your tongue and swallow, which I find makes them easier to eat if you're eating them raw.
They don't taste bad. Their overall flavor is sweet, because they have only ever eaten honey by this point. But their texture can be gag inducing for anyone unable to tolerate something squishy, like soggy bread.
The cooked larvae have a far improved texture and admittedly a more pleasant taste.
To cook the larvae, place them on a metal sheet (like a cookie tray or some sheet metal) and grill over a low flame until their white bodies turn yellow and tighten up. There is no need for any seasoning, as the larvae themselves have been naturally seasoned by the honey inside of their bodies.
The cooked grubs take on a texture reminiscent of a fully cooked egg yolk. Thick and creamy. They strangely take on a taste similar to a fried egg as well. Which makes the fact that they also taste like honey a very peculiar, but not unpleasant experience. It is very much a flavor combination that, while unexpected... Is pretty nice. Had I access to fresh eggs, I might even be tempted to see if the honey and egg combo was any good.
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Fruit and Honey Tonic:
Ingredients: Red Honey, Water, any fruit
This makes for a mildly fermented, and therefor slightly alcoholic, carbonated drink. As such, I must advise caution when drinking this. Please be responsible.
For the recipe, you will need at least half a cup of water, half a cup of honey, and one cup of the fruit (or fruits) of your choice. Or in more simpler terms, a ratio of 1:1:2 for water, honey, and fruit. Which I am clarifying because this beverage is easiest to make in large batches, to make use of available pickle jars (which you should be sure to have thoroughly cleaned by boiling them).
You can collect your honey with a blunt instrument. Scraping it directly from the hive into a prepared jar will be easiest.
Then combine the collected honey with an equal amount of water, and mix until thoroughly combined.
Take your fruit and cut it into small chunks, no larger than an inch in size. If your fruit has a tart skin, I would recommend removing it as it will add an unpleasant bitterness to the resulting drink. Naturally, you can leave the skin on if you prefer that bitter note.
Combine your fruit with the honey-water mixture, then tightly seal to prevent anything from getting inside.
Leave in a warm, dark place. At least 24 hours, and for as long as five days. Be sure to burp your vessel every 24 hours to prevent the resulting gasses from building up too much (I have learned the hard way that these glass jars can burst).
Allowing the drink to ferment for longer will allow for more alcohol to develop in the drink (and I repeat: PLEASE drink responsibly!), and the distinct flavor of the added fruit will definitely become more prominent.
Once you've decided to end the fermentation process, open your container back up and remove all of the fruit. This can be eaten if you like, but I prefer to leave it out for the bees as thanks for all that they can provide for me.
Once the fruit is removed, your drink is ready! Just add it to your drink canister and enjoy! Any extra can be kept in its current jar for storage, but should be moved to a colder environment to stop (or at least greatly slow) the fermentation process.
Your resulting drink will be pleasantly carbonated, fruity, and slightly (or moderately) alcoholic. It also doubles as an energy drink thanks to the many beneficial properties of the honey!
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Honey roasted vegetables:
Ingredients: Red Honey, water, root vegetables like carrots / beets / radishes, or leafy vegetables like kale / brussels sprouts / spinach
This is sort of an all in one recipe that only really changes depending on which sort of vegetable you decide to use.
To create your basic glaze, combine 1 part honey with a half part water (1 cup and a 1/2 cup, as an example). Mix thoroughly. You will use this slightly runny honey to season your vegetables, whatever type you decide to use.
Make sure that all of your vegetables are thoroughly cleaned before you start any cooking.
If you happen to be using hardy vegetables, like carrots or beets, you must first chop them into reasonably sized pieces. You'll then want to steam these pieces for 5-10 minutes, just to soften them up a bit (if you happen to be using brussels sprouts or something similar, steam these whole). This can be easily done by pouring water onto a hot sheet of metal and covering it to prevent the steam from escaping. Just be careful not to burn yourself.
Once your vegetables have softened up a bit, you can begin the glazing process. This can be done by either directly pouring the glaze onto the vegetables, or by adding the vegetables directly to the glaze to thoroughly coat them before returning them to the heat.
Cook for an additional 10 to 15 minutes. Make sure to move your vegetables around every so often to prevent them from burning. Reapply any remaining glaze if you like. Remove the vegetables from heat once they're nice and soft. Pull a couple minutes early if you'd like a little extra firmness to them.
The caramelized honey will add a very nice sweetness to the vegetables, along with a faint smokiness.
If you're roasting leafy greens, simply toss the greens with the glaze (you can technically eat this as is, as a sort of salad. If you don't feel like cooking).
Once your greens have been thoroughly coated with their glaze, move them to your cooking surface and allow to heat up. Remove your greens once they have wilted, and enjoy! This particular dish is more about the texture than the taste, as I've personally found that leafy greens don't have a very intense flavor. Though you may find that these honeyed greens have sweet, herbal notes to them.
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Honey smoked meat:
Ingredients: Red Honey, any meat of your choice (roughly 1 pound), salt (optional), any vegetable (optional)
To create your basic glaze, combine 1 part honey with a half part water (1 cup and a 1/2 cup, as an example). Mix thoroughly. You will use this slightly runny honey to season marinate your meat.
Take your portion of meat and chop it into sizeable cubes. 2 x 2 inches works best from my experience. If you happen to have salt, sprinkle the meat with salt and allow to sit for about 10 minutes so that it will work its magic.
Take your meat and your glaze and combine them in a sealable container. Store in a cold place for at least two hours, preferably overnight.
Once the marinating process is completed, remove your meat chunks and skewer them (DO NOT THROW OUT THE MARINADE YET!). Either on a sharp stick, or on a metal one if you have it. If you happen to have access to vegetable, chop them into reasonably sized pieces and skewer them along with the meat, alternating between meat and vegetable with each addition to the skewer.
Use any remaining marinade to coat your meat (and vegetables) skewers, then carefully arrange said skewers around a slow flame. Ideally a flame which is producing a lot of smoke, as the smoke amplifies the flavor of the meal.
Cook this way for 30 minutes and up to an hour, rotating the skewers every 10 minutes to make sure that everything cooks evenly on all sides.
The resulting meal with be sweet, smoky, and savory all at once. If you were able to add vegetables, they will add a nice earthy undertone to everything that is absolutely *chefs kiss*. This is one of my favorite ways to put the red honey to use, as it makes for a delicious and energizing meal.
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Honeyed Grains:
Ingredients: Red Honey, any available grain, water, milk (optional)
Take your available grains and combine them with enough water to fully cover them. Be sure to use a vessel suitable for boiling, as your next step is to bring the mixture to a full boil over either a very low flame, or some very hot coals.
Allow the grain to boil until they are fully cooked. 10-15 minutes. Then carefully strain the hot water out of the grain.
You will then mix in at least 2 tablespoons of honey for every 1 cup of cooked grain that you have prepared. If you have not collected your honey before this, just bring your container of hot grains straight to the hive and scrape some honey in.
If you do not have access to milk, then the dish is done and you are ready to eat. These honeyed grains make for a pleasant meal, similar to oatmeal. You can even crush up the cooked grains if you'd like to eat something with a bit of a stickier consistency.
If you DO have access to milk, then you'll want to add around 1/2 a cup per every cup of cooked grain that you have made. If you're like me, you may also want to add a little extra honey to really amp up that sweet taste. The addition of milk makes for a creamier, better rounded meal.
If another crewmember has made this for you and they happen to have used milk, do not ask where it came from. We do not like having that conversation.
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