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The Frozen Lake (5x10) - DensiLand: Analysis of all things Deeks & Kensi

The Frozen Lake (5x10) – The one about “The Frozen Lake”

Written by: Dave Kalstein - Directed by: John Peter Kousakis

Author’s note: Quiet possibly the longest analysis post of the entire series (to date). You might want to grab a snack and settle in or possibly tackle it in parts.

As the sun rises, Deeks is diligently hard at work when the guys arrive. CALLEN: What the...? Anomaly in the room. SAM: Deeks hard at work. Deeks pulls a face indicating his focused work status shouldn’t be a surprise.

CALLEN: Deeks not talking. SAM: Interesting. CALLEN: Mm-hmm. Very interesting. DEEKS: Interesting? No, no. I'm, uh, not interesting. SAM: Now that's interesting. CALLEN: Don't mind us, Deeks. The guys sit at their desks. SAM: Won't make eye contact. CALLEN: Elevated heart rate. SAM: Fidgety--not from the coffee. CALLEN: Sweaty-- and it's not the climate. DEEKS: Come on, guys. SAM: Defensive. DEEKS: I just... I think that maybe the coffee is just stronger today. Deeks grabs for one of the three(!) cups of coffee on his desk. CALLEN: Changing the subject. And he's got some dark rings under his eyes. KENSI: Naturally, Morning. Deeks looks to her cautiously before averting his eyes back to his work. SAM: Your partner's acting weird. KENSI: My partner is weird.

CALLEN: She has a point. SAM: Oh, he's unresponsive. CALLEN: Creative avoidance. To Kensi, What do you think? Kensi literally shrugs it off. SAM: Isn't that the same shirt you had on yesterday? Kensi gives a wide-eyed look of tempered fright to Sam, but remains silent.

CALLEN: Wow. This is a first. Neither of you have anything to say. KENSI: No, no, I... Deeks moves to respond, but is interrupted by Eric’s whistle. ERIC: Case on deck-- quick briefing, and then our day gets tactical. Densi each rises and heads to Ops, but halts when nearing each other. DEEKS: Motioning her forward, Go ahead. KENSI: It’s ok. DEEKS: No, go ahead. KENSI: That’s right. DEEKS: No, go ahead. KENSI: Sorry. DEEKS: No, I think you should go first, 'cause we should go to ops... KENSI: Okay. DEEKS: …separately. Sam smirks as Callen chuckles. SAM: Smiling the entire time, No... no...no! Hetty observes from the balcony above.

Ok. So let’s see if we can work our way through the scene before I get into my continuation of the “End of ‘Recovery’” analysis. How’s that sound? So, Deeks in early. Deeks focused on work. Deeks quiet. Any one of these things would tip off the guys, but together is a screaming neon sign that something is amiss. The way Sam and Callen effortlessly rip Deeks apart bit by bit is actually warranted. It’s as if laid-back California surfer has had a personality transplant. Seriously? What happened to our beloved Master of Undercover? Apparently when the issues are core to his personal life, his secret thoughts and emotions, all sense of professional disposition is wholly elusive. Forget about simply a crack in his expected demeanor. No. The rambling is the only tell we really need. (Actually I’m surprised the expressive scratch to his head or face is absent.) All the rest simply compounds the situation. This is more akin to Superman trapped in a cage of Kryptonite.

Speaking of Kryptonite, in walks his partner, who Deeks notably does not greet and sneaks only the briefest of glances. Kensi plays her role exponentially better than her partner as she easily responds with a traditional dig at the detective with “My partner is weird.” (A favorite Densi line of mine, FYI.) However, Kensi’s façade is quickly failing as well when she’s unsure of how to respond to Deeks’ behavior (or lack thereof). Perhaps she expected him to be his “normal” self – or at least pull off a believable facsimile.

Then like a targeted heat-seeking missile (& by now their temperatures are surely rising), Sam hits the bull’s-eye of the target with an inquiry about Kensi’s shirt. Busted. Kensi’s likely so in her own head, she’s ill-prepared to fight off the morning onslaught of her senior teammates.

Off to start the day with a usual operational briefing, Densi turns into a duo of bumbling idiots (stated in the most loving way, of course). They are literally tripping over each other verbally and physically as they horribly attempt their ascent to Ops. These two people can’t even take their customary trek upstairs without making a mockery of themselves. It’s going to be a longggg day.

Having witnessed this comedy of errors Callen knowingly chuckles [much like he did from their initial jewelry store hand-holding scene in “Special Delivery” (2x4)]. Yet this time his partner doesn’t remain living in the land of blissful ignorance. No, this time Sam is too keenly aware of the possible chain of events that have led to their morning “bullpen blender of bizarre behaviors”. Sam, the only one who has first-hand experience with the situation both personally and professionally, negates the reality likely both for Densi as well as himself in being their teammate.

Ok, you were warned – the rant continuation begins here. After really considering the closing scene of “Recovery” (5x9), it was a thing of beauty both verbally and through silent expressions. Then, IMHO, a considerable chunk of the fandom ruined it. So here marks the application of the “You ruined it. No, I made it better.” Densi “argument” from “Free Ride” (4x10) where I am Kensi and a cluster of the fandom is Deeks. Sigh.

So pretty much the entirety of the fandom was left longing for clarity stemming from the end of “Recovery”. And what did we get? The exact opposite. While it was (I state begrudgingly) the right call on behalf of the show and writers to prompt our imaginations to run wild and produce more questions than could probably ever been initially conceived, I found it to be the absolute most frustrating ploy from the show (to date). In short, it seemed to me to turn our cherished ‘ship, of flawed and damaged beings who are simply striving for the love and compassion they both so richly deserve, into nothing more than a simplistic, crude, cheapened, and immature subject of “Did they or didn’t they?” This was unworthy of this show, these writers, these characters, and the people who portray them.

I felt like all of the complexities of these characters, of who they are individually, of who they are as partners, of what they have become together, of all the trials and tribulations they’ve overcome and still have yet to address was ignored for a shoddy tactic where a prime goal was to merely stir-up the fandom. A scheme to attract viewers. The depth of these characters built over years of drama, action, humor, heartbreak, pain, concern, and care were simply sold out. It was no longer about these people, who they are, what they are feeling, what this shift means to them both in and out of work. No. It all boiled down to nothing more than sex. Long-time fans of this show became this way because it’s what we were presented, what we’d come to expect in deep, thorough storytelling. They’ve said so themselves – if you can get people to care about the characters, that’s a key to the success of any show. These high standards were suddenly ignored. I suddenly felt like the show and the writers no longer actually cared about these characters, and if they didn’t care, then why should I? When/if these two complex characters were to engage in the ultimate physical act, it seems crossing that line should have been treated with more respect. But maybe that’s just me being a “Pollyanna, pie-in-the-sky” dreamer.

In trying to see the intent of all this, now that we’ve had some distance from it, maybe the show and writers were actually trying to communicate this presumed scenario from the night prior actually wasn’t a cornerstone event in advancing Densi. They are two grown experienced adults, so why would this be such a big deal? Maybe leading the fans to believe this happened wasn’t a big deal to most, but it was for me.

I’ve stated elsewhere I personally didn’t feel they were “ready”. They still have too many things to work through individually as well as together to only further complicate it with… this. I really wanted to see them progress through and past some of these issues first. I know others countered that now they are more likely to work through them together. It’s an opinion others obviously have a right to, it’s just not what I had hoped for them. I mean, come on, Kensi can’t even verbalize what she feels about Deeks! (And no, I am not at all going to mention, let alone discuss “the deleted scene”. As you might expect, that’s a whole other multi-faceted rant.)

Over time, as we observed the passing of more episodes, there were some who eventually merged to “my side” of this argument that the deed wasn’t done that night. While it’s nice to allow our minds to consider all the “what ifs” and possibilities, they show and writers just left too many gaps in this one. So we’re left to guess what might have happened. Maybe there was just cuddling, etc. as aligned with the beginning of “Praesidium” (6x3), where Kensi’s butt serves as Deeks’ pillow. (Yes, Kensi, your partner is weird.) Did Kensi take a taxi back to her place? Did Deeks drop her off? When? She arrived notably later than him. Surely he didn’t just leave her sleeping at his place and left a note! How rude!

We know they used “the shirt” as a component to drive the presumptions from the night prior. But seriously? Kensi didn’t have time to at least change her shirt? At home? From a go-bag? From her locker? Please, someone give me a plausible option for this, because I found it almost wholly unbelievable. Although we saw Kensi do a “walk of shame” in the very early days of the show, she knows better now. Kensi’s a smart girl. Too smart for this. It’s yet another reason I’m mad about this scene, mostly from the standpoint of defending against the stereotypes of my gender!

Ok – cleansing breath and let it go – or at least move on. Why? The glory of the rest of this episode deserves its accolades, even as so many others disagree with my appraisal. (At this point I’m pretty used to voicing the “minority opinion”.)

On the upper level Granger hands Hetty the “White Ghost” folder.

HETTY: Factually, It was only a matter of time. Do I talk about this here or not? Based on how I like to align with the pacing of the show, then the answer is sadly no. Sigh. Ok – just a little. Hetty states this with no emotion, which isn’t out of character for her when it comes to missions. AUGH! It’s painful, but no I will keep to my trend and wait until “we learn” what “White Ghost” actually refers to….

During the Ops briefing the agents describe “Gurkhas” (mostly to Deeks). KENSI: With admiration, They're legendary. The average Gurkha's about five -four, 125 pounds, and rumor has it, they stacked more kills in Afghanistan than anyone else, except for America and England.

DEEKS: Unsettled, Well, nothing brings out your inner fangirl like a guy with a knife.

It’s times like this we and Deeks are reminded of just how violet/powerful/giddy Kensi can be with a weapon! Deeks’ questioning tone made me think (& laugh) that he’s reconsidering why/how he’s endeared by this unique being!

The team is deployed to a hotel in an effort to hunt down one or more suspects. The guys are on one floor, with Densi on another. After bursting into a non-descript room Deeks spots a shooter outside.

DEEKS: Kens! He slams her against a wall, covering her body with his in a protective manner. From an upper floor Callen spies the shooter and takes his own aim, causing the shooter to flee. Both looking surprised, You good?

Never one to surrender a chase, Kensi indicates for them to split-up. She takes pursuit of the shooter outside over the balcony as Deeks resumes the chase around the back of the building. As she works to comfort a little girl frightened by the gunfire, the shooter is able to sneak up on Kensi. As he keeps his weapon securely at her back, Kensi tosses aside her firearms and focuses on aiding the little girl (portrayed by First Assistant Director, Eric Pot’s daughter) to safely escape.

During this the shooter takes possession of Kensi’s blade and sneeringly remarks, “Nice knife.”

As he clears the side of the building, Deeks calls for his partner. DEEKS: Kensi?! KENSI: Deeks! Upon seeing another armed federal agent, the shooter takes Kensi and uses her as a human shield. The assailant holds a gun on Kensi, but Deeks continues his trek toward his partner. As he closes in, Deeks swaps his rifle for his handgun, setting the criminal as his target.

MAN: Move, and I'll empty her guts all over the pavement. Deeks contemplates his limited options (as telegraphed by his customary licking of his lips). KENSI: Emotionlessly, Take the shot. A car approaches, causing Deeks to consider the new factor to the situation. DEEKS: Ordering, Drop it! The car pulls up, indicating it as an escape vehicle for the criminal. KENSI: Demanding in her stare and with an annoyed tone, Take the shot. DRIVER: Yelling from the vehicle, Come on, let's go! KENSI: Angrily commanding, Send it. Deeks continues to review the situation, but remains still, refusing to act.

MAN: Get in! Deeks maintains his aim, but does not shoot.

The abductor shoves Kensi aside and begins firing at Deeks. Both Kensi and Deeks to take cover. Deeks regains his aim, but the criminals are fleeing. She turns to her partner.

DEEKS: Genuinely concerned, You okay? Kensi appears blatantly furious, seeming to grind her teeth in rage. Plainly, I didn't have a shot. Kensi silently – seething - retrieves her weapons from the nearby yard.

DEEKS: Hey. Listen, I didn't have a shot. Kensi walks up to Deeks and punches him in the jaw.

In silence, Deeks briefly assesses the area of injury as Kensi stalks away while routinely reattaching her rifle. Yelling to her but remaining physically planted, I didn't have a shot! Kensi shakes off the punch with her hand, but never acknowledges Deeks’ proclamation.

Unaffected, she continues her trek away from her partner. The detective’s gaze never wavers from his partner, knowing her violent reaction stemmed from much more than his choice to not fire.

Focusing on the mission’s priority, this went down pretty much as expected. The hunt. The engagement. The prioritization of an innocent civilian and sacrificing one’s own safety for that of another. Backing-up a partner and assessing the situation. Ok, so the baddies got away. It happens. (Especially within the first eight minutes of the show.) It soon became obvious this scene, in the end, was about nothing related to the case and everything to do with the shifting status of our favorite ‘ship – both within and outside of work.

There it is folks. The punch heard ‘round (& nearly obliterated) the Densi fandom. But hold up, let’s take this at the pace it deserves. These two have pretty much always been able to maintain the necessary level of professionalism to conduct their work. Even if one was annoyed with or longing for the other, even if we and the rest of the team saw and sensed it, it’s never really gotten in the way of their jobs. Sure they’ve each had emotional reactions that have resulted in questionable decisions on a mission – Kensi going alone to hunt her father’s killer, Deeks protecting Ray – but those haven’t been the outcome of something brewing between them.

It’s obviously something that’s been a worry in both of their minds for quite a long time, even as neither voiced it. (If they hadn’t come to that conclusion on their own, Hetty’s words and Callen’s past involvement with his own Tracy, certainly served as “in-your-face” warnings.) It’s one of the most frightening questions either of them have been forced to face: “What happens if we get together as a couple and it falls apart; what happens to our partnership?” With these two people who have virtually no family and a long history of losses, voluntarily putting their closest connection in jeopardy may very well be a risk neither is willing to take. (Insert 3+ years of escalating tension here.)

We’ve consistently seen them each silently struggle with this over the years. Kensi won’t allow herself to move toward him and Deeks holds himself back from her. (I’ve always thought Deeks did that as an effort for the good of both of them while Kensi was more focused on protecting herself. Perhaps this is because it seems Deeks has been scripted as more selfless or expressive.) Anyway, back to “the punch”…

Now, nearly two years later, viewers are still grappling with this, mostly holding firm to their original reaction and rationale. I’ll admit I’m no different here. So in keeping with my customary “minority opinion”, I felt Kensi’s blow to Deeks was true to character. (Let the flaming begin.)

Deeks knew not taking the shot was wrong; she would be mad angry; and he’d have to communicate a justification that would hide his real reasoning for his inaction: prioritizing the safety of his partner (and now presumably more) ahead of capturing the suspect. Kensi did what she always does. She attempted to control her overwhelming emotions, ended up lashing out, and then fled. We’ve been witness to this time and time again. In fact, one of my favorite instances of this (mentioned in an earlier post) was from the very first episode where she bashes with a metal pipe a headlight on a convertible to improv a cover and immediately draws her weapon in warning to a group of thugs before racing away. Sure that was all case-based, but it showed who this girl inherently is. Her outbursts, such as kicking presumed FBI agents in the… sensitive area, are legend. She didn’t get the nicknames of Kick Ass Kensi and Bad Ass Blye for nothing.

This is who Kensi has always been. Am I justifying her physical violence applied to her innocent partner? No. Actually, I was horrified that she struck him in the jaw, the exact same area in which Siderov had inflicted his gruesome torture. (Of course that’s based on the significant portion of my life spent with my “dental team”. In the case of a thorough implant process, it takes months for osseointegration – solidification of bone to form with an artificial implant – to be complete. And that’s if a bone graft wasn’t necessary!)

Others point to this as a case of domestic violence. It’s not how I personally interpreted the scene or act. Yet, I can understand if this served as an unintended trigger. Domestic violence is always wrong. I just honestly don’t see Kensi having this ingrained character trait.

The scenes of this episode in particular, of expanding the characters, was brought about by the wise choices of Daniela Ruah and Eric Christian Olsen. Acting is far more challenging with the absence of dialogue. This has been a consistent attribute of Kensi’s being and something Daniela Ruah seems to have perfected over the years. It’s through this on-going experience and the guidance of director JPK, who so well know and understand this character that we see her shine (even if it’s currently in a negative light). Whether she’s internally enraged or forcefully concealing her emotions, Daniela knows how far to turn the dial in order to telegraph the emotion to the audience – or not – based on what the script and situation call for. (As Citzens of DensiLand have heard me say, I often found Kensi a tough read – mostly in the early years – which was core to her persona. I keenly appreciate this effort and trait, even if it was often a frustrating viewing and interpretative experience.) It’s this complexity of Kensi that makes her so intriguing.

Once Kensi is released she utters not a single syllable; yet, we know with acute clarity what is running through her mind. Kensi has always been more of a “show” rather than “tell” kind of woman, which is the exact effort shown at the end of this scene. It made viewers question so many things without a single word. Besides “what happened the previous night”, is Kensi at war with herself or Deeks – or both? Why? Is this a partner issue or a “thing” issue? This was only made more exciting to consider when, how, and under what circumstance Kensi would eventually explain her action. While so many viewers were overtly angry at Kensi for her action – and yes I’ll add my own “poor Deeks” in here – I was pleased to see the persona of our hard-as-nails agent maintained rather than weakened with the advent of her presumed progression into a personal ‘ship. In short, they didn’t suddenly make Kensi a head-over-heals, giddy girl in the throes of infatuation. That would have not only been out of character, but disrespectful and demeaning to the character.

Then there’s Deeks, he, even more so than Kensi, is trapped in a no-win situation. He can succeed with the mission or keep his partner unharmed, but not both. As Kensi fell silent following her release, it’s the normally babbling Deeks who goes mute as his partner is held at gunpoint. He’s so overcome with the danger of the situation, he can no longer multi-task with his customary chatter. With Deeks having to keep aim, Eric Christian Olsen is restricted in his efforts to facial expressions only. No words, no gestures. The genuine worry and near helplessness in being unable to rescue Kensi as well as reject her demands is far more damaging to him than the physical punch. He can’t give her what she needs professionally or personally in this moment.

While we’ve seen these two keep it together during ops in the past, they’ve kept to their professional roles. If one started to “crack”, the other was the glue to keep them together. Here Kensi reacts personally, but so does Deeks. Eric is able to vanquish virtually any part of Deeks that relates to his “detective” role. His expressions toward Kensi are purely from his heart, directed at the woman who stole it to whom he willingly gave it long ago. It’s this. The vulnerability they both fear, that they believe makes them weak, that we see on full display here. Eric portrays Deeks as an emotionally compromised man, willing a change in their circumstance – both professionally and personally in this moment – but being held powerless to do anything about it – for him, her, them.

What lingered for me at the end of this scene was 1) the anticipation of Deeks confronting Kensi about the punch, which based on his historical treatment of her would be unlikely and 2) Kensi’s eventual regret and apology for her assault. I was patient. Even through the very end of the season, I eagerly awaited this to be a considerable turning point for them and a sign of growth for her. It was like a punch to the gut that it never came. I know Kensi is written as a woman who internalizes everything, but to have ultimately ignored this prominent action was inexcusable in the overall storytelling and disrespectful to the characters. This was one of many examples that left viewers perceiving Kensi as crass and uncaring, something that goes against the very grain of all things Densi.

*Hair & Wardrobe Notes* Again, I’m a bit ashamed to put a focus on this, but TV is a visual medium, right? As always Kensi’s ponytail gives her a wonderfully youthful appearance. There won’t be many wardrobe references for Kensi this season out of respect for the then-pregnant Daniela and the team attempting to hide little River. As for Deeks, it must be said. Goodness! The two-tone blue shirt, dark jeans, fluffy curls, neatly trimmed scruff all accessorized by the rifle body sling and much adored thigh holster. (Other than “Vest Deeks”, does it get much better than this?!) It’s a simple fact when Deeks gave his rifle a discarded swing to swap for his handgun, it was a pure definition of H.O.T.

Callen leads a mission update in the bullpen. Kensi and Deeks are uncharacteristically quiet.

Kensi quickly flees and Deeks uncomfortably follows her. Now in the shooting range, Kensi is practicing her aim on a paper target with less than perfect results. This seems to only fuel her mounting frustration. She shifts to her knife. While it missed the center mass target as Deeks looks on, it does find its mark over the heart.

KENSI: Having heard the entry of her partner, but refusing to turn and face him she voices her warring frustration and anger in an unsteady tone. 24 hours ago, you would have taken that shot. DEEKS: Keeping to his story, I didn't have the shot. KENSI: Accusing, Yes, you did. DEEKS: Sighing, Okay, yesterday, I would have taken the shot, but it's not yesterday anymore... is it? Kensi remains rooted, avoiding facing her partner. She looks down in an effort to evade his reference. …Is it?

Callen and Sam update Hetty. The trio cryptically alludes to the less than successful outcome of Densi in the field. As Hetty questions the team’s “readiness”, Callen is non-committal. He neither throws his colleagues “under the bus” (in the path of Hetty), nor staunchly defends the junior partners. To this Hetty responds, “Hope is not a plan, Mr. Callen.” (I happen to use this statement with my students regularly.) Sam is visibly compelled to respond to Hetty, but ends up keeping his thoughts to himself. Hetty takes silent note of this. Her reaction seemed to be that of questioning anger that Sam may refute her assessment or perhaps surprised that the SEAL may be defending the problematic actions of the younger team members.

Still in the firing range Kensi now faces Deeks.

DEEKS: Confessing, Okay. I should have taken the shot, and I let my emotions get in the way, and I'm sorry. I'm honestly just trying to make this work. KENSI: With pained simplicity, It's not going to work. Deeks takes his own pained, grasping breath. Maintaining eye contact, I'm standing on my frozen lake.

DEEKS: Visibly searching, I don't know what that means.

KENSI: With a wavering voice, on the verge of tears, It's something that I learned in Sayoc. Your frozen lake is the name for what you want the most in the world, and you want it...you want it so bad that you'll do anything to get it. And your heart takes over. But because of that...it destroys you in the end. It's right there, just sitting in the middle of this frozen lake. And you think you're fast enough to-to go out there and grab it before the ice cracks...

DEEKS: With a resigned look and whispered tone, And what you don't realize is...you're already standing on the ice and it's falling apart around you. Nearly imperceptibly, Kensi nods in affirmation. Notably interrupting, Eric enters, yet Densi remain rooted in their stance and gaze toward each other. Eric is aware of the sensitive atmosphere in the room and evenly explains an update to the case. Deeks responds with a simple, “Good” and follows Eric out. Kensi turns back toward her paper target, working to gather herself along with her weapons.

This is such a bittersweet scene - & a notable turning point for Densi. (It’s obviously an important scene for me since it’s displayed in my blog’s header!) Let’s appreciate these two struggling beings finally, FINALLY physically face each other and use actual words to communicate! It may not be perfect, but this is progress!

Earlier Kensi’s emotional outburst was demonstrated in a violent act. Now as she tries to calm herself, to work through the warring, out of control emotions, she seeks a safe refuge. She escapes to her “home” in the firing range, surrounding herself with her weapons. This is a place in which she has control and expertise. These are known entities. Her weapons are simply an extension of herself. She knows how to load, handle, fire, and throw these things. They are dependable. She knows how they will react. Here there are no risks (to her). She’s confident in her use of these items. These objects are unlikely to betray her, and even if they did, she knows how to respond and adjust. Kensi can force them to meet the demands of her will. She hasn’t yet learned how to deal with her emotions and Deeks (the more-than-my-partner Deeks) with the same level of understanding, consistency, and confidence.

At this point she may externally be blaming Deeks for his lack of action, but internally the real blame lies with how she overreacted. In the field, as an agent, the woman is a machine on lock. However, the human, the woman that she is inherently is far more erratic. She’s shut down her emotions for so long about so many things, it must be a surprise even to herself in how out of control she feels and is acting. Suddenly her long-term efforts have abated. As much as she’s trying to literally hold herself together, pieces are slipping through her fingers. While all of this might be in reaction to Deeks, he actually has very little to do with it.

Now alone in a safe space for both of them, Deeks – never one to be able to lie to Kensi – comes clean. He voiced his genuine feelings at the restaurant and that seemed to be a success, so he applies the same tactic here. (Deeks, this is pretty much going to work every time. With anyone. But especially this woman who yearns for open and honest and clear communication. It’s what she’s longed for and even requested/demanded.) Deeks has already put all of his cards (and heart) on the table for her, so there’s really no going back now – not that he wants to. As he expresses his truth, he can only hope it will encourage her to do the same.

And it does, but certainly not with the outcome he’d hoped for. Kensi, the black-and-white half of their ‘ship, draws the line in the sand. If them being more than partners evokes this kind of inner turmoil and external reactions (regarding both their work partnership and personal relationship), then obviously it’s not going to work. With this single data point Kensi extrapolates the situation to its inevitable end. They had been near perfect partners for over three years. One thing shifted and now everything has gone sideways. Thus, the logical conclusion is to revert back to their clearly defined and successful work partnership status. Anything personal seems to jeopardize that. Kensi may long to have it “all”, but sees that as an impossibility, something she’s probably expected for quite some time. (This may be a case of her having to be right: she knew it wouldn’t work and has now made that a reality.) As someone who’s already lost so many people in her life, she’d rather have a part of Deeks in her life (her work partner) versus risk losing him completely.

Kensi’s emotional struggles became a solid part of who she is as a person. Such a rooted characteristic is incredibly difficult to change, if not impossible. This is a major factor in my minority view pertaining to the ending of “Recovery” (5x9). I felt each of these characters had a number of issues to work through individually before “crossing that line”. I understand life is rarely this defined. However, here we are seeing the fallout. Regardless of what actually did or did not happen physically following their restaurant departure, each of these beautifully flawed people has some individual work to complete on themselves before adding someone else to the mix. It could be argued they have the option to work through those issues together, to help each other, but that’s not what we see here either.

No, Kensi cuts him off from her and closes herself off (again) from him. She needs to stop the pain she’s feeling. The pain is self-inflicted through her own self-recrimination and blame, so she does the only thing she thinks is right, by effectively cauterizing the bleeding of her heart. If she pushes him away, she protects her heart. And needing to control the situation she likely believes she’s protecting him as well, maintaining her distance so she can’t hurt him.

To me, this is one of the first true times we’ve seen and heard Kensi prioritize Deeks’ feelings. Previously she’s been so focused on protecting herself that she sometimes involuntarily or purposefully placed hurdles between them. It’s not that her intent was to offend him, it was just often an unintended result. Because Deeks is so good at bearing such emotional damage, it was unlikely for Kensi to realize what she had done. Deeks was never one to make her aware of her repercussions for fear of her running away out of remorse. He realized how fragile she was, but never wanted to make her feel weak in facing that fact. At times Kensi realized the same about Deeks, but typically only when someone else was negatively impacting him (Nicole, Siderov, etc.)

It’s no secret I adore the character of Kensi; she’s my favorite fictional character ever. But I’m not afraid to call her, at times, selfish. In many situations I’ve interpreted her being more concerned about keeping herself mentally and emotionally safe to the detriment of Deeks. (I accept any flames I might get for this, but stand by my assessment.) However, this is an aspect in which Kensi has slowly grown over time. It’s in this scene we feel her trying to protect him as much, if not more than, herself.

The depth and sincerity Daniela Ruah and Eric Christian Olsen bring to this scene overrides all of the dialogue. In fact, Daniela absolutely stole this scene; I couldn’t pry my eyes off of her. She gave us an open and vulnerable Kensi who is facing her agony, something I’m not sure we’ve ever seen, certainly not at this level except perhaps in the hunt for her father’s killer. Daniela expertly walked this tightrope of voicing Kensi’s heart while grasping to maintain her façade of self-control. She gives us a Kensi who knows she can’t run. Not anymore. Not from him. So she digs deep and faces the challenge head-on. As she speaks, Daniela not only maintains eye contact, but expresses another layer in imploring Deeks to understand more than simply her words (something he’s already been an expert on for a long time).

I could clearly relate to Kensi’s internal chaos. Would she physically break? Would she allow the tears to fall, to dissolve into body-wracking sobbing? How would Deeks react? Anger? Pleading? Anguish? Would she be able to handle it, to stand her ground in putting a stop to their evolution? Would this prompt an end to their entire partnership? As much as she doesn’t want it, everything’s on the line – which is the exact thing she’d worked for so long to avoid.

As much as Kensi is facing her fears in this moment, she’s able to maintain her demeanor through a metaphor. (You can stop the ranting about the “metaphors” before you ever start here. My appreciation of the use of the metaphor here is absolute and unwavering. It painted glorious imagery for the current struggles of the Densi ‘ship. Well done, Mr. Kalstein.) This is how Kensi preserves her composure. Yes, she’s explaining her feelings to Deeks (a miracle in and of itself to be applauded), but she does so through a nearly objective story.

She is owning her truth here. It’s “her” frozen lake. She speaks in the second-person, referring to “what YOU want most”. In this she isn’t referring to Deeks with “you”, but an objective “person”, indicating the story correlates to anyone. The “you” in her story is herself without directly revealing that. It’s a slight differentiator that makes all the difference in how this scene is viewed and interpreted.

In using the metaphor, she’s working to safeguard herself as much as possible. While she’s taking responsibility for her emotions and actions and facing the person to whom she is currently hurting – and who can hurt her the most – she uses the objective story to state her case. She works to explain her feelings to Deeks while simultaneously trying to separate her own feelings from the explanation. (Does that make sense?) At the start of her story Kensi is relating her feelings without directly sharing how it has and is impacting her. Not only does this work as an effort to protect herself, but also works to separate Deeks from her feelings. With this she’s also trying to avoid having him blame himself or try to take ownership of their seeming “failure”.

By the end of the story it’s difficult to surmise if she’s only referring to herself or if she’s also included him, fearing he will do something foolish (in addition to not taking the shot) that will jeopardize them. She’s imploring him to not only understand, but to accept the situation. Here she’s trying to protect him, not from her, from but his inevitable future self.

She’s preemptively attempting to halt the verbal refuting and physical efforts he’s likely to apply to keep them together. This is where we see how much Kensi knows Deeks. She can be confident in knowing he’s unlikely to let her go easily, not after all of their years together, and especially not after the fact he just got her to in some way admit she has feelings for him. Simply put, he’s never let her go in the past no matter what, so why would this be any different? They are both fighters, so she can predict his reaction based on so many of their shared experiences.

The metaphor works. Deeks gets it. His look of resignation and quiet voice indicate he followed her allusions to the same painful future end for them. Deeks actually inserted himself into the story in his final statement about “already standing on the ice”. It’s a terrible realization for him to accept they’ve already gone too far and there’s no way to save either one of them. The recognition that any additional efforts will only worsen the situation may be the most heartbreaking of all for this man who has always been steadfast in his pursuit and protection of Kensi. Simply, the more he tries the worse it will get. What is Deeks to do with this fatal prediction?

In forcing myself to focus on ECO in this scene (Have those words ever been uttered?!), initially he has Deeks avoiding Kensi’s conclusions as he looks everywhere but at Kensi. Then likely due to the slight tremble in her voice, his eyes lock to her – and the truth is unavoidable. Seeing Kensi crack in an illustration of her frozen lake story rips at the very fiber of this man. (Such physically expressive choices, whether by the actors or series-veteran director JPK, are what truly made this scene so heart-breaking. It allowed viewers to feel all the pain of their beloved characters.)

While I just stated Deeks inserted himself into the end of the story, it can just as well be interpreted as him feeling empathy for Kensi. He palpably sees and hears what their situation has done to her, the pain it is causing her, which he accepts blame for. It is perhaps the single thing he’s worked to avoid after all these years. And now, within a single day his worst fear has become reality: he is hurting her. The inherent martyr that is Marty Deeks likely feels he’s the one who pushed her to the middle of this blasted lake and now neither of them has the ability to save her. Yet we can see the wheels turning. It is here ECO walks the tightrope of having Deeks accept the tragedy of the situation versus grasping for a yet-unknown potential solution for this unique pair. Things with these two are never simple….

It was a notable choice to have Densi remain rooted when the (expected) interruption occurred. (Based on predictable fan fallout, Barrett must have groaned at the fact his character got tasked with the unenviable assignment.)

The picture of the motionless (dare I say “frozen”) duo expressed the magnitude of their conversation and situation. While they eventually returned to their professional roles, in that moment, their connection as a man and a woman superseded that of the mission.

While Deeks needed time with his thoughts, he departs with Eric, leaving Kensi time to herself. As Kensi gathers her weapons, she is likely assessing her words to Deeks as well as working to regain her composure as a federal agent. What the future now holds for these two is capricious at best, which is an unexpected and glorious offering of this show and episode. After three plus years of Densi, even the most ardent fans are left to wonder where these two go from here.

In the “end” we know our Densi will be together. The destination has never been/should never be the focus. The magic of this ‘ship, of any ‘ship, is the journey. It’s knowing these beautifully flawed, vulnerable, broken people will encounter unimaginable challenges to which we can only speculate on their reactions and the commanded shifts in their paths. It is in how they respond to those challenges, to each other that truly drives us and them.

This will always be among my favorite scenes simply because of Kensi’s personal growth for herself and its development/advancement of Densi. Here there is no real guessing as to Kensi’s thought process; she is transparent in a way that is quite rare for this complex and guarded woman. Similar to wanting to award ECO an Emmy for his beach scene with Nate in “Impact” (5x2), the same holds true here for Daniela Ruah. While Daniela and ECO are magic in their flirty banter and scheduled annoyances, it is in scenes like this, where we are gifted with the essence, of nearly feeling the pained souls of these people that is truly moving. Further, it is because such occasions are so rare that they are the most valued. They – these people and these scenes – are true treasures of this show.

Back to a crime scene, primarily the guys question the tactics and weapon choice of a likely culprit. SAM: Dismissing Callen, Bring a knife to a gun fight, you’ll see what happens. Sam and Callen end up in a brawl with the Gurkha. Definitely one the best action scene I’ve ever seen on TV! (Kudos to the entire team including Ernie Reyes, Jr., Dave Kalstein, and Rafael Kayanan! It’s especially impressive that they basically shot this not only in a single take, but the first one!)

And so much for your flippant knife vs guns comment, Sam!

Densi observes as Callen & Sam interrogate Thapa in the boatshed. KENSI: He's got a wife and three kids in West Bengal. A strike by Pakistan would wipe them out. You really think he's going to give up a shot at keeping them safe? DEEKS: Somewhat pointedly, If he can control his emotions. He briefly turns his head toward Kensi, but avoids eye contact. KENSI: Flatly, A lot easier said than done. DEEKS: Almost whispering, Well, it's never easy when you start to care…I guess this makes the thumb drive his frozen lake? Over his shoulder he looks to her.

KENSI: Factually, Guess it does. Again, she keeps her eyes focused on him.

DEEKS: He'll do the right thing.

We’re talking about the Gurkha here, right? Or not…. They are talking about them. Read it anyway you want: they could be talking about themselves or each other. Masterful writing if you ask me. It’s like looking through a window and into a mirror simultaneously. Is Deeks referring to Kensi about controlling her emotions or her supposition that he can’t? Is Kensi stating she’s struggling to control her emotions or that it’s a fault of Deeks? Is Deeks blatantly stating his obvious care for Kensi or noting her seeming recent “rejection” of it? Deeks’ mention of the thumb drive/frozen lake is slightly flippant, but what’s a guy to do when his woman just shut them down? Kensi, maintaining control of her emotions (as is commonly characteristic), takes the verbal jab.

It’s when Deeks states, “He’ll do the right thing” that my immediate faith is restored. Whether this pertains to Deeks reassuring Kensi that he’ll do the right thing or Deeks encouraging Kensi that she’ll do the right thing, the outcome is the same. At some point in time, they’ll be fine. (Good! I mean good!)

Granger not initially open to taking someone from the team for White Ghost…. GRANGER: You've got your hands full right here, Henrietta, but I do appreciate the offer. It seems the years have made you kind. I’m honestly still not sure what we’re supposed to take from this, other than peaking our curiosity about the target/impending mission…. Thoughts? I’m sure we’ll get to all of this in due time.

Tracking down leads for this current operation, Nell and Eric are stuck waiting for results. ERIC: Hesitantly, I think... NELL: Dismissing, I don't want to know what you think about Kensi and Deeks. ERIC: I didn't say what I was thinking. NELL: Solidly, But I know what you're thinking. ERIC: So, you're thinking it, too? Nell offers only the tiniest of smirks. Whispering, You think Hetty knows? NELL: Stating the obvious, Hetty knows everything, I think.

ERIC: Conspiratorially, That's what I thought. Of course Hetty knows everything! Anyway, “I think” this scene was supposed to present a humorous word-play with the repeated “think”, but at least to me, it didn’t fulfill its intent.

Callen directs the next step in their operation. CALLEN: No. Deeks, handle his stuff. Kensi, you're coming with Sam and me. KENSI: Wh...? Kensi and Deeks both look to Callen in question. CALLEN: You two could use some space. Both Kensi and Deeks avert their gaze to the floor. KENSI: Taking her order, Understood. SAM: Handing Deeks Thapa’s holster and blade. You got this?

DEEKS: Confidently, I got this. He takes it and moves toward the interrogation room. Kensi is a visible mix of anger and annoyance as she exits the boatshed. So, any guesses if Densi’s separation was Hetty’s command or Callen’s decision? Either way, the kids know they’re in trouble. They’re both still so in their own heads, and having no justification, neither makes an effort to refute directive. There’s no rambling distraction by Deeks, no outrage by Kensi. This is different; this is serious. The silence by the junior team members tell the senior agents more than they want.

Deeks preps Thapa for their mission. THAPA: I prefer to work alone. DEEKS: Recalling, Hmm, I used to feel the same way. THAPA: Inquiring, What changed? DEEKS: Simply, I found somebody worth trusting. THAPA: And your team trusts me? DEEKS: I can't really speak for my team, but, uh... Deeks slides the weapon to the Gurkha. I do. THAPA: Why? DEEKS: It's a damn good question. I understand that you want the thumb drive. And I get that, 'cause if I was you, I'd want it, too. And for this mission, that makes you a liability. But you got this. THAPA: You believe I can do it? That my brain will win over my heart? DEEKS: With a hint of imploring, Brother, I got to believe that, 'cause if you can do it, so can I. THAPA: Jemadar Thapa. 5th Gurkha Rifle Regiment, Frontier Force. DEEKS: Detective Marty Deeks. LAPD. They shake hands. THAPA: The Gurkhas have a saying: "Better to die than be a coward." DEEKS: Struck by the absolute nature of the statement, he responds slightly stunned, looking into the distance. Wow. I think my regular partner was a Gurkha in a past life. THAPA: Then he must be brave. DEEKS: Well, she... smiling, she's the bravest. A strained expression returns to his face.

As usual, when Deeks is in Interrogation we end up learning more about him (usually more than the suspect). Laugh all you want, but to me, Thapa is to Deeks as Jiminy Cricket was to Pinocchio. (I don’t get many chances to apply Disney references, but this one seemed fitting.) By this, I means Thapa serves as both a wise guide and physical manifestation of a conscience. In Thapa the entire team sees a warrior, someone similar to his very own blade-wielding, Warrior Princess Kensi. Yet Thapa is as much a warrior mentally as he is physically. These are the skills both Deeks and Kensi desperately need immediately.

Deeks surmises the likenesses. With the thumb drive Thapa can return home and keep his family safe, but that runs in opposition to their mission. This is another NCISLA instance of the “good of the many” over the “good of the one”. Deeks has heard all the talk about the disposition of the Gurkha. He now hears the sage words from the man himself. Now Deeks needs to see an example of those choices in action.

The theme of the Gurkhas reminds Deeks of his partner: “Better to die than be a coward.” He heard this very thing from her just hours earlier. She’d rather painfully cut her ties to him than be unable to face the fears their ‘ship has produced. Perhaps it’s here he realizes how and why she’s truly pulling away from him. This is what he needs, the insight into the rationale (even if flawed) of her mind. This is something he can work with. This allows him to formulate a plan to work around and break down her (now obviously flawed) thinking. Give Marty Deeks an opinion and he’s have ten rebuttals to your argument. The legalistic mind of Deeks coupled with his experience in crafting and maintaining covers often makes him a persuasive and creative genius.

Instead of bravely sacrificing her heart in order to keep hers (and his) intact, Deeks simply needs to help her see the other side of this facet. How can he get her to bravely fight for them? The fear she has isn’t new; it’s been consistent through their development. What’s new is their literal overnight change of status and the seeming come-to-life negative consequence. How can he get her to apply her bravery to work for them instead of against them?

Now at the airfield, Callen, Sam, and Kensi setup in overwatch positions. Kensi is prepping her sniper rifle as Sam inquires to her readiness. Each of his questions is met with a single-syllable emotionless response.

As Kensi move away to stake out her position, Sam surrenders and looks to Callen. CALLEN: Smirking, Loves to open up about her feelings, doesn't she? Yet Sam retains a concerned look toward their sniper.

Outside a hanger at the airfield, DEEKS: So you've never had a partner? THAPA: Shaking his head, No. DEEKS: There's no female Gurkhas? THAPA: No. DEEKS: Well, you should consider yourself lucky then. Openly sharing, I mean, look at me, I'm standing on a frozen lake. Recognizing his rambling, with dismay And… I'm beginning to sound like her.

THAPA: Easily determining Deeks’ “condition”, he offers an unseen slight grin. The heart needs discipline. Deeks looks back at him, scrunching his brow in a sign of attempting understanding. Without discipline there is no honor. Without honor, we are nothing.

DEEKS: Appreciatively, You know what, you're pretty cool, Thapa. Suddenly unsettled, For a second there, I forgot that you chopped off some guy's head this morning. THAPA: There is only one way to cross a frozen lake. This gains the attention of the immediately intrigued Deeks.

No female Gurkhas? How sexist! (And there my inner Kensi comes blazing through!) So while Thapa can’t relate to Deeks’ partnership, as a husband we can certainly associate with a man who has given away his heart. As is typical Deeks, his mind is elsewhere when the op is lacking action. The filter-less Deeks we know and adore is on full display, speaking his mind without consideration for the situation, his location, or audience. There’s just something inherent about Thapa than connects with Deeks. The man is willing to go to war to defend what he holds most precious. (And no, I’m not sure which one I’m referring to here.)

The brief exchange takes on new meaning at the end as we discover a kindred spirit familiar with the metaphor of The Frozen Lake. (Of course a Gurkha would be knowledgeable of all blade-based combat techniques!) So when Deeks mentions “frozen lake” in the midst of his female partner-based chatter, Thapa has a clear understand of the detective’s conflict. Perhaps Deeks considers controlling or holding back his heart to be a negative aspect, something that simply feels unnatural to him, particularly in regard to Kensi. Yet it’s somewhat akin to the end of “Empty Quiver” when she promises to try to loosen up and Deeks commits to being more serious. Kensi could teach a master class on having her heart “locked up tight like a Samsonite” (credit to Tony DiNozzo for that one), which has always been a point of frustration for Deeks. He’s been picking that lock/tearing down that wall for years. After all the trust they’ve built, of finally getting her to open up to him even slightly, the last thing he wants to do is close himself off to her. That would surely result in their unquestionable demise. He wouldn’t do that to her or to himself.

However, Thapa paints this picture in a notably different light: discipline. In any type of law enforcement Deeks has had to learn and apply discipline, whether it’s maintaining a cover, tracking a suspect, firing his gun, or using specific questioning techniques to prompt information or even a confession. (He might not consider it discipline, but perhaps “strategic or creative decision-making”.) In all of these ways discipline has garnered positive results, in many cases, life-saving results. They use the term discipline here, but Kensi might call it control. While these terms have slightly different descriptions, they can be interpreted in vastly different ways.

As Deeks likely strives to have Kensi apply her (emotional) bravery in a positive approach for them, so too Deeks perhaps determines self- (emotional) discipline may also work to their benefit. Based on the morning’s operation that went sideways, Kensi’s expectation of Deeks inability to control his emotions came true. In short, she doesn’t have faith in his emotional discipline. So if Deeks can prove this aspect of himself to his partner, perhaps their ‘ship has hope for its continuing journey.

If any of this started to take root in Deeks’ mind, it was suddenly halted by Thapa’s final words, “There is only one way to cross a frozen lake.” Holy cow! Deeks must feel like the single key to his ‘ship with Kensi stands in his midst. This frozen lake metaphor has been rolling around in his head for hours and now fate has put him face-to-face with a man who appears to understand both the metaphor and the solution to his devastating problem. Jackpot!

And then Beale – interrupting again! - is in Deeks’ ear with an update! (Eric you better put Ops in lockdown because Deeks - & the Densi fandom - is gonna come after you!)

After a combo chase/shootout, Sam works to relay the situation objectively to Deeks, who rejects Sam’s initial attempt at a “pep talk”. Deeks only persists in blaming himself. SAM: Maybe you didn't hear me just now.

DEEKS: No, I did. I'm not alone. I got it. Now confessing to his earlier lapse, Listen, uh, just for the record, Kensi told me to take that shot at the hotel. I've made that shot before. I've been there, I've done that, I got the T-shirt, I just didn't take it. CALLEN: So get us back in the game.

It was a quick connecting scene, but it’s important. If Deeks is blaming himself for losing Thapa, this is an indication of how much worse he’s blaming himself for not only failing Kensi in the field earlier, but also “failing” her in their ‘ship. His self-recrimination is likely only growing in depth and breadth with each passing minute. Both as a member of the team and their family, Sam and Callen are supporting Deeks, something that was long missing from the show. In their bonding over their shared torture, I for one happily anticipated some “Seeks” time this season! Even the team leader has a soft spot for their colleague who got figuratively beaten-up professionally and personally in the same day. In his conflict with Kensi, he’s missing more than simply his “back-up”.

At this point Deeks is pretty much having a “Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day”. He’s had an awkward start to the day with his partner, failed to follow her direction and SOP on an op, suffered her putting a stop to their “thing”, and now has lost a human asset key to their case. As Hetty directly points out, “You have several problems Mr. Deeks. Which one are we talking about?” Indeed. Yet our unflappable, assured detective is set on making things right – at least those for which he can influence. The primary and frankly easiest issue to address is Thapa and their case. (Work first; play later.) Others are depending on him and he’s never one to shirk his responsibilities.

Deeks has clearly formulated his own plan, thought through each detail which he outlines to Hetty. Deeks feel like he’s really messed-up in this operation, so he feels solely accountable to fix it. It’s dangerous for sure, but it also illustrates the “born operator” status of Deeks: he never fully trusted the Gurkha. It’s why he fed him the Armenian mob info as bait. Well played, Mr. Deeks!

Deeks is prepping his cover appearance in a mirror when Kensi quickly approaches.

DEEKS: Flatly, Hetty brief you? KENSI: Critically, Yeah. We assessed the location in Ops and, honestly, I don't like it. Makes it impossible for us to reach you if something goes wrong. DEEKS: Definitively, Not much of a choice. It's the only way. KENSI: Sympathetically, Or you mean the only way to redeem yourself for the hotel and Thapa?

DEEKS: Taking a moment, Can you do something for me? KENSI: What? DEEKS: Turning to face her, Can you, for a second, just pretend that I'm not Deeks and, for a second, pretend that you're not Kensi and that we're not partners and no one's trying to save the planet? She struggles to understand. Can we pretend for a second that we're just a boy and a girl who are hanging out? We can...drive around in my pickup truck, go get ice cream, go bowling.

DEEKS: They both smile. But that's the thing because the possibilities are endless. We're young. We have all the time in the world. Silent moments pass as they consider the image presented. KENSI: She extends her hand and in a professional tone, My name is Fern. Hi. DEEKS: With an amused smile, You're Fern. Kensi is somehow able to maintain a straight face – with a slight challenge. Slightly chuckling, Well, so nice to... so nice to meet you, Fern. I'm Max.

KENSI: Nice to meet you. DEEKS: Simply, You have any plans for tonight? KENSI: Treading lightly, I don't know. It's complicated.

DEEKS: Confidently, Well, not from where I'm standing, it's not. KENSI: Challenging, I have a boyfriend. DEEKS: Serenely, So does my girlfriend.

KENSI: Shifting topics, That's a nice suit. DEEKS: Barely muttering, Yeah. KENSI: Bringing them back to the issue at hand as she looks him over, The problem with it is that's it's too-too tight. It's gonna be hard to conceal a weapon. DEEKS: Forlorn, The first thing Talita's guys are gonna do are pat me down. They're gonna find it anyway. KENSI: Removing her knife in its holster, she offers it to her partner. Here.

DEEKS: Slowly shaking his head negatively, No, I-I can't take that. KENSI: Declaring, My partner doesn't go unarmed. Take it. DEEKS: Finally accepting the weapon, he removes it from its sheath to inspect. With a momentary smirk, he keeps his gaze lowered until the last word. I've never had a girl give me her, uh... knife before. Does that mean that we are... official?

KENSI: Silently nodding her head, but then she somewhat dismisses her non-verbal expression. Eh, sometimes a knife is just a knife.

She exits, but Deeks eyes remain firmly fixed on her.

If there’s one thing Deeks and Callen share (beside their seemingly similar rotten childhoods), it’s the ability to shift into “lone wolf” status. While they each tend to do it at different times for different reasons, it’s a skill they have each honed. Being on this team teaches all of them the value and importance of partnerships – the security of it and the personal benefits far beyond work. Here we have Deeks making every effort to atone for his self-realized “sins”. Luckily, Kensi also recognizes it in short order. The detective has openly admitted he’s good at “beating himself up”. The team doesn’t need to apply any resentment or blame. No, Deeks is better at punishing himself more than anyone else could. Yet, this “punishment” and his attempted reparation could cost him (& the team) far more than just a bit of emotional damage; this has the potential to result in a fatal outcome. He’s put himself up as a sacrificial lamb. While Kensi may be upset with her partner for not maintaining his professional composure and supposedly injuring her emotionally (although I argue she did it to herself), she’s still unconditionally concerned for both her partner and this man who has become core to her existence.

As Kensi refers to Deeks’ obvious castigation of himself, it’s more than he can handle while facing this treacherous mission. If today has taught him anything it’s that he needs to work on separating his professional needs from his personal wants. He has to focus on the mission and, at least for a brief time, set aside his own concerns about himself and Kensi.

This highlights a couple of notable and often conflicting characteristics between Kensi and Deeks. She has always drawn a clear line between work and play. When she is in the midst of an operation, her focus is unwavering. Contrasting, Deeks has seemingly and somewhat effortlessly integrated those same aspects. He’s able to preserve his aim in a shootout while simultaneously cracking jokes.

Similarly, when it comes to Deeks, Kensi often applies blame to him – for not being serious enough, for not being focused, for trying to break down her “wall”, for blaming him when something goes sideways – whether it be related to an objective case or private emotions. It is here we see the cracks in Kensi’s façade. She might be Bad Ass on the outside, but inside this woman is strikingly fragile. It’s often too much for her to face and take responsibility for errors or poor choices; it’s too painful. This is who she has been for quite a long time and frankly Deeks has only supported her responses. He makes it too easy for her to playfully assign blame to him or sidestep accountability. This would likely strain their partnership/friendship, which is a path he’s unwilling to travel. The perfect example is her trademark “punches”. We’ll obviously address these later in the season, but when they turn from playful to harmful, including the one to the jaw in this episode, he never calls her on them. He’s never brave enough to force her to face her actions for fear of damaging “them” and provoking her”flight” habit. He keeps silent, he believes, for her benefit.

So while Kensi lashes out, Deeks’ fight is within. His façade (We all have one, right?) is Mr. Happy Go Lucky, when too often the exact opposite is true. While Kensi struggles to handle external condemnation, Deeks has the title locked up on this. The problem is it’s locked up in his head. It’s as if he’s mentally in that MMA cage, but this time is fighting against his worst enemy – himself. He’s so wrapped up in his own mental brawl that he can’t deal with an additional complication voiced by Kensi. So he uses her tactic from earlier in the day to make his point.

He learned earlier that day he currently can’t fully function as a member of the team if she is rooted at the forefront of his mind. Yet he knows he has to approach this carefully as to not scare or push her away. He doesn’t tell her to stop or be quiet or have faith in him, or any of those expected responses. No, he uses a story (although not as abstract as a cryptic frozen lake) to get her to understand what he needs from her in that moment. It’s a rare instance of him asking for something from her, which indicates the magnitude of his request and his precarious mindset.

His story (as usual) does the trick. The tension – of the mission and them – is defused. (Of course the mention of ice cream was surely the cherry on top of that sundae for our sweet-toothed Kensi.) The day had amassed a suffocating level of pressure from which Deeks was almost unable to function. He couldn’t be what the team needed to be. He couldn’t be what Kensi needed him to be. And with those two things alone, Deeks couldn’t be who he expected of himself. His gaze nearly pleads for her to understand and accept the unenviable position in which he currently stands.

(As someone who’s always on alert for sudden turmoil, Deeks’ statement of “We have all the time in the world” felt like perilous foreshadowing. I swear I’m not kidding. Anyone else? Oh Deeks; you’ve tempted fate too much on this one! Why, oh why, can’t I live in a land of sunshine and candy for once?!)

After considering each other and the story Deeks wove for them, Kensi not only acquiesces to his request, but also plays along, voluntarily joining him in the conceptual alternative universe. No one could be more surprised than Deeks when his Fern voluntarily voices her endearing, yet regularly refuted, moniker. Here Kensi is forthright in supporting her partner to the extreme. For her to keep a serious expression and even raise the stakes with a glint of challenge, she conveys everything and more Deeks could have hoped for. (He wanted them to be “just a boy and a girl” so she is giving him exactly that.) As he would in running a cover, Deeks easily follows her lead in presenting his own character of Max. Max? MAX?!

*Mandatory Rant Break* MAX?! What the…?! Fern, yes. We get Fern. It was the very first nickname he gave her, which holds a special place in all of our hearts. It takes on an even greater importance since she freely included it in their imaginary joint-storytelling. But Max?! Whoa and No. I get they needed a Deeks counterpart to Kensi’s Fern. But Fern was/is an effort of endearment from her partner and an annoyance to Kensi. (A win-win in Deeks’ book.) Max is not only none of those things, it’s the precise opposite of all of those sentiments! Not to mention Deeks hates Max. (And I use the term “hate” very carefully.) It’s already been made obvious Deeks doesn’t want Kensi anywhere near Max.

This use of Max here only highlighted a notable, ongoing, negligent aspect of the show: Deeks hasn’t had enough deep or continuing covers. In fact, really none of them have. For a team based in undercover missions, it seems the show may have started to forget this was to be a foundational element to the show and team. Homeless Guy doesn’t even have a name! Of the few others like Sven (who I know we haven’t even gotten to yet) or Matthew Dinkler, they expire after only a few hours. Having just participated in the Pre-Season 7 wikiDeeks Roundtable, I concur with others: we need more and enduring covers. This was and has the great potential to breathe some fresh life into these characters! Anyway, this glorious scene – IMHO – was ruined by the use of Max. Trying not to simply “rant & run”, I will offer the only possible solution I could concoct for this errant reference. Since Kensi used an endearing nickname, Deeks should have done the same. In this case the only real option was probably Shaggy. *End of rant*

With their characters outlined and Deeks now back at ease, he tests the waters, but does so within the safety of their “alternative universe” – which just might catch Kensi off guard. (This man truly is a master.) Yet this entire Land of Pretend likely has Kensi keenly primed. She’s non-committal to his evening inquiry, which is the safest option for her without hurting him (further). As Deeks is likely cheekily thinking, “That wasn’t a no!”

With Kensi playing along, Deeks resumes his usual comfortable and confident demeanor. In their alternate reality it’s just them and the pressure of their work and partnership has vanished. It’s as if a restart button has been pressed, almost as if Deeks is getting a “do-over” for his day – at least where Kensi is concerned. This is the simplicity he’s long sought with her and tries to help her discover their “thing” doesn’t have to be as “complicated” as she’s always predicted.

Yet Kensi holds true to herself, her character, and their real-world situation. She presses him, perhaps in an effort to determine if he can truly convince her all aspects of their expanding ‘ship can actually co-exist in harmony. They presented us with equally simple dialogue that made me gasp all the air out of my living room and slam the pause button on my TiVo: KENSI: I have a boyfriend. DEEKS: So does my girlfriend.

Did she…? Wait! Did Kensi just admit to “having a boyfriend”?! In the mission?! To Deeks’ face?! And that it’s actually Deeks?! (At this point, after having recovered from my shock, I was floating on a cloud like a giddy schoolgirl!) Ok, returning to Earth….

Kensi doesn’t make a declaration, no that would be too straight-forward for them. Now confident in their standing, it’s Kensi who takes the lead in trying catch her partner off-guard in describing herself (with a hint of flirtation) as taken with a “boyfriend”. (Verbal sparring indeed with this presentation of her one-upmanship! This is the dialogue-only version of them physically wrestling in the gym!) Instead, she voices it as a challenge, knowing it will produce a remarkable response from her witty partner. As usual, he doesn’t disappoint. Deeks’ immediate comeback with, “So does my girlfriend” felt as if Deeks had yearned to refer to Kensi with that term for a very, very long time. It had been residing at the forefront of his mind and on the tip of his tongue for ages; he just needed the right (granted by her) to voice it.

(I have to admit there was just something about Deeks uttering that line which struck me as magnificently H.O.T. and layered in sweetness. It was surely some undefined combination of that childlike smile, the soft tone, the possessive nature of “my”, and celebrating his successful unwavering marathon-like pursuit and winning of the complex being that is Kensi Blye. Finally. Finally Deeks was happy and we could be happy for him.)

The boyfriend/girlfriend references both clarified the status of their ‘ship and was possibly the extent to which either of them could handle, particularly standing in the midst of their workplace on the cusp of a potentially perilous mission. Thus, Kensi steered them back to firm ground in commenting on the attire for his cover. Normally dialogue commenting on a “too tight” suit would be laced in flirtatious mocking, but the situation is too serious here.

Kensi knows she can’t be his usual back-up, so she does what she can to keep him safe by offering him a concealed weapon. Her concealed weapon. [This prompted a flashback in my mind of when Deeks finally offered Kensi his gun at the end of “Bounty” (2x8).] Realizing her offer from both a professional need and personal want, Deeks accepts the knife and quickly works to become familiar with it. Even with this assignment looming, the playfulness of Deeks cannot be dampened. Because in the back of his mind private doubt permanently resides, Deeks seeks final confirmation on the status of “them”. Kensi wordlessly nods her head in affirmation, but then verbally reduces its meaning.

Oh man Deeks, you really are standing on a precarious frozen lake! The woman referred to you as her boyfriend, used the nickname you gave her, and nearly forced her beloved blade into your hand. Does she need a neon sign to declare her commitment to you? Yet, we can’t beat-up on Deeks here. He’s had a rough day and with a woman like Kensi, it’s honestly a smart move to ensure he read all the signs and interpreted her words accurately. (Communication issues indeed.) He needs to remove any lingering questions from his mind related to his “girlfriend” in order to fully focus on his cover and successfully (and safely) complete this mission.

Bravo to Kensi! Within a matter of hours she seems to have found stable ground from which to re-launch their ‘ship. This is the bravery (even if still tentative) Deeks was hoping and trying to prompt from her earlier. While we know strong relationships aren’t born out of “intense experiences” (Thank you to the movie, Speed!), perhaps this time the thought of Deeks going undercover alone with a known murderer, without her by his side, is more than she is willing to simply dismiss as work. With very little options, she literally arms him with – what some would term her “security blanket” – her trusty blade. She is sending a piece of herself in there with Deeks, but it’s not a distraction this time. No, with this offering, he’s empowered.

It’s no surprise this is among my favorite Densi scenes, along with a vast majority of the fandom. Yes they are at work. Yes they are discussing facets of the operation at the beginning and the end, but it’s the middle that’s so splendid (just like dipping your spoon in to the center of a brilliantly fluffy and piping hot soufflé as the Crème Anglaise melts into the cake…. What can I say, I love desserts as much as Kensi!) In this we get Deeks and Kensi as he basically described – just a boy and a girl. Everything else falls away when they allow themselves to open up to the other, a vision we are rarely privy to.

This was actually a delicate scene, by this I means it could have prompted varied interpretations or given many different impressions. The alternate universe story could have been dismissed as nothing more than their customary (yet brilliant) flirtatious banter – or conversely, with the wrong tone, a scene seemingly filled with resentful taunting barbs. Different choices in tone or non-verbal gazes could have filled this scene with unintended meanings that led viewers in diverse directions – steering the ‘ship off-course, if you will. I expect copious kudos are due to director Mr. John Peter Kousakis. Such careful leadership and guidance could only come from someone who has been integral in the birth and growth of Kensi and Deeks’ characters. (This is the glorious result from a longstanding loyal and dedicated crew and staff.)

While many viewers put Dave Kalstein in the doghouse for a few Season 5 choices, I happen to adore his writing – even when it gets muddled in complexity. The amount of dialogue he writes that can be interpreted with dual or varied meanings (far beyond the seductive double entendre) is wonderful. Particularly with his scripts, I find new treasures with each subsequent viewing. It’s as if he purposefully plants little gifts to be discovered in the future. It’s also with these long-time NCISLA writers that we (more so in the earlier seasons) got connections to the characters’ pasts and with each other. This is what made us really relate to these characters, to care about them, which as COD has stated, is the key to success in TV. (Amen brother.)

With a Kalstein script I know I really have to pay attention, to listen, to work to make these connections. Some might say this takes away from the simplistic entertaining aspect of TV, but the way they challenge my thinking about the show, team, and characters makes it far more intriguing. (In my book, the epitome of this concept was Aaron Sorkin’s writing of “The West Wing”.)

With scenes like this I often wonder how many takes - with incredibly different choices – they made. This reminds me of the “Praesidium” (6x3) script notes we were privy to from Scott Gemmill and ECO. I adore that level of insight, seeing the differences between the words on the page, the intent of the writer, and the choices ultimately made by the actors, directors, and editing staff!

Last but never least, both Daniela Ruah and Eric Christian Olsen had to be incredibly selective in their acting decisions in this scene. Too much grinning or smiling or even a slight smirk in their gaze (which I suspect could be a challenge for the in-laws) would alter the direction of their characters’ progression. Eric had to present a multi-layered Deeks that was conflicted internally over his own professional actions and decisions, the dangerous operation he’s about to lead, and the impact his choices had on his partner as well as the fallout from the advancement of their ‘ship with “his girl”. Not only does he have to keep his work life separate from his personal life, he somehow has to try to divide his relationship with Kensi in the same way (his partner vs Kensalina). However, life doesn’t work that way. There is always some level of overlap, of integration.

We’ve seen Deeks scared for Kensi’s safety on a number of occasions; however, we’ve not really observed Deeks fearful OF Kensi, of how she could hurt him. Until he was face to face with her that morning in the firing range, I’m not sure Deeks ever fathomed the possibility. For as sensitive as Deeks is inherently, ECO has kept that trait strategically veiled. Yet that line of thinking would be selfish for Deeks, something he doesn’t embody. ECO’s given us hints of Deeks being frightened of hurting Kensi in some way, but until that morning had never been confronted by the actuality. Kensi made a choice for herself, but here ECO gives us the consistent reaction of Deeks owning the blame.

ECO has Deeks on a tight rein, but as usual it’s the proximity to Kensi that releases him from the self-imposed inner turmoil. His mindset and attitude are based almost entirely on her state (I’m good if you’re good.”), thus the expected and repeated inquiry of concern we so often hear from Deeks to his partner of, “Are you good?” We can visually discern when Deeks shifts from obsessing over the danger of his role in this operation to his partner and their status. We are driven to understand the usually gifted multi-tasker persona of the detective has been overwhelmed and now must focus on only one thing at a time.

As soon as Kensi begins voluntarily participating in Deeks’ alternative universe, ECO shows us how Deeks changes and responds with the return of his Sunshine back in his life as more than his partner. Deeks is pretty well known for “give him an inch, he’ll take a mile” philosophy, always testing the waters to see how far he can take something. Reading Kensi as always, ECO puts Deeks back in the driver’s seat, unwilling to possibly allow Kensi to flee from him yet again. With their ‘ship returning to even the slightest forward motion, the man is now emotionally secure and able to center his energy and attention on successfully carrying out his mission.

While many of us adore watching ECO’s Deeks effortlessly ebb and flow between serious cop, jokester, and lovesick puppy, it’s Daniela Ruah’s control over Kensi that ultimately pilots this scene. Deeks’ words and actions are based almost entirely on Daniela’s choices for Kensi. I use the term “control” to describe Kensi’s nature and Daniela’s skill in only slightly expressing her character’s emotions. Both at the beginning and end of this scene Daniela has to display Kensi’s concern without being overt or a stereotypical emotional “female”. This is the core of character consistency for Kensi. While internally Kensi probably just wants to wrap Deeks in Kevlar armed with an Uzi with her by his side, she knows this is beyond overkill (pun intended). She’s never been comfortable expressing sensitive feelings; she’s been taught to manage (to a fault) her emotions. Especially as a woman in such a testosterone-filled, male-dominated field, she has to take extra efforts to never be viewed as emotionally compromised or weak.

Yet even in applying all this control, Daniela has to convey how Deeks is able to move past, break through her carefully constructed emotional barriers. Daniela’s often overlook discreet acting selections are possibly the most powerful thing about Kensi. ECO’s Deeks doesn’t force his way to her. No. This Daniela has progressively matured Kensi from pushing him away, to keeping him at arm’s length, to permitting his proximity, to easily integrating him into her life, and now indicating her intrinsic need to keep him safe (for more than professional reasons). We are able to easily distinguish all of this, not to mention Deeks is the only person who can elicit these reactions, in the notable absence of explicit verbal sentiment. (This is why they call it acting, people!)

When Deeks outlines his “alternate universe” this Kensi no longer refutes his presumed silliness or dismisses the unrealistic nature of the possibility. She gives him what he needs in that moment, an escape, a reprieve from the pressure she applied to him earlier in the day that he’s obviously compounded on himself. Honestly, this is a relief to Daniela’s Kensi as well. He seems to have naturally forgiven her, while probably not healthy for their long-time ‘ship, the effort provokes rays of light from Sunshine.

Another sign of Daniela advancing Kensi is the transition into their flirty banter. (Ok yes, Kalstein’s obviously a key component in all of this as well.) Instead of being uncomfortable with it, Daniela gives us a Kensi that now relishes it, not only because she now trusts Deeks’ sincerity, but because that trust has built her confidence in taking the lead. Yes she’s comfortable in control as well as being a “one-upper”, and with Deeks easily accepting and encouraging her ploys, Daniela portrays a freer, relaxed, dare I say happy Kensi.

Yet Daniela pulls Kensi back to the gravity of the risky operation before him and her inability to simply be a passive by-stander. Daniela almost imperceptibly re-engages Kensi’s professional façade in objectively offering Deeks Kensi’s weapon. He initially accepts it as a show of personal concern and commitment, but Kensi’s concentration on keeping their job separate from “them” doesn’t allow her to admit to his accurate assessment. For her emotional stability and his safety in the operation, Daniela must maintain Kensi’s professional demeanor – even if her mind is screaming in opposition to her dismissive words and his debatable mission.

I could go on and on (yes, even more than I have here) about these two characters, actors, and writer related to this scene. It’s this level of complexity and multi-faceted offerings that addict us to this show and these people.

“Marty Finch” initiates his cover in a butcher shop as the rest of the team wait anxiously in the SUV. (I can only presume that location already had the yellow tinting on the upper windows? If not, that was a terrible lighting call. ECO should never be lit/backlit in yellow. Eee-gads! Apologies in advance to chief lighting tech, David “Bubba” Jarrell, or DP, Victor Hammer, if this was either of your call!)

The guys verify Kensi’s mindset in the SUV. Even though she uses the term “good”, the evident pause and troubled tone, indicate the contrary (as usual).

I have to admit I’m sad they ended up killing Talita. She was an incredibly entertaining embodiment of arrogance, cheekiness, and snarkiness we’ve not seen in quite a while.

They toss Deeks in the meat locker, bringing him face-to-face with a beaten, strung-up version of Thapa.

Even with this Gurkha having repeatedly complicated their day and mission, Deeks’ expresses only sympathy for the suffering man. Talita forces a gun in Deeks’ hand with orders to shoot Thapa. Deeks is slow and deliberate in his movements, stalling for 1) time to derive an alternative plan and/or 2) his team to come to their aid.

The look from Thapa can only be described as pleading (for both his own life and Deeks’ soul.) Bravo to Ernie Reyes, Jr. for portraying a complex and questionable character for which we so quickly connected to (especially considering we aren’t an “easy to trust” fandom)!

The perfectly timed “shutters” only build the tension for viewers, knowing surely Deeks can’t/won’t shoot Thapa, but uncertain how Deeks will escape this unthinkable mandate.

Returning from the break we learn Sam, Callen, and Kensi are cut-off from Deeks’ comm due to the reinforced walls of the freezer. Callen orders his team to breach… but in 60 seconds. They seek confirmation from Kensi, but she is speechless, only almost imperceptibly offering a slight nod.

Yet to herself she quickly shakes her head indicating the negative. Sixty seconds is simply too long to leave her partner alone in a highly dangerous situation. Ignoring orders she bolts from the SUV, forcing the guys to follow her lead.

The expected shootout ensues. As Kensi yells to Deeks, it’s just the situational distraction he needs to shoot (with the single bullet in the gun) one of the thugs. With his right hand Deeks grabs the knife in his jacket pocket as Talita shoots Thapa. Deeks uses the knife to stab another of the nearby thugs while SIMULTANEOUSLY SNATCHING - IN HIS LEFT HAND - THE GOON’S GUN TO SHOOT TALITA, THE BULLET WHIZZING JUST PAST KENSI’S HEAD!

(Are you freaking kidding me?!) Apparently Kensi and I had the same thought….

KENSI: Innately reacting, Are you crazy? Forcefully questioning his tactic, You almost took my head off! Who takes that shot?

DEEKS: Critically, Took you long enough. Deeks moves to free Thapa from his restraint.

Whoa. Whoa! Where to start?! WOW! Deeks is the man! Talk about being able to assess the situation and use every conceivable resource and opportunity available! He takes out three criminals with two different weapons, including one in his non-dominant hand, and holds an aim so exact to maintain the safety of his partner who’s in the direct line of fire?! More of this please! (Kudos to the fight choreographers on this one! We can be assured this required considerable prep and practice for only a few seconds of footage – and we deeply appreciate it! How did they even fit the cameras in there to capture each of those angles?) Talk about trusting your training, Deeks! (Eric made this look like just another day at work, which I guess for him, it was!

Oh Kensi. Deeks just can’t seem to do anything right today! First, he doesn’t take the shot and gets slugged for it. Now he does take a shot, one that likely saved her life, and what thanks does he receive? A verbal barrage of recrimination! Yet again she’s responding emotionally. She is accustomed to having criminals taking shots at her, but I’m sure looking down the barrel of a gun being aimed by her “boyfriend”, her own partner was likely heart-stopping! Ok, I’ll cut the girl a break on this one! And so does Deeks. He tosses his own now deep-seeded reproach. (I’m betting his retort was intended to be slightly sarcastic, but it didn’t read that way – to me. Instead it sounded somewhat serious. It’s not like Deeks to be truly upset with Kensi about anything, especially not in her effort to provide him needed back-up. Maybe we can blame this on the adrenalin?) Anyway, now Kensi has a first-hand sense of what Deeks was feeling from their morning squabble without him directly calling her out.

Yet before we continue on, I do have to hold Kensi accountable. Immediately following Deeks’ rescue of Thapa, Kensi apologizes to Callen and Sam for disobeying the hold order. Grrr. (Dave, why would you do this to Kensi?!) She expresses her regret for “going rouge” to her superiors, but not for physically assaulting her partner?! (Now, do you get why people began to grow annoyed and angry with Kensi?)

Yet, somehow I still get it; I understand Kensi. It’s far easier - for Kensi - to own up to a seemingly objective decision related to a dangerous and violent encounter with criminals than to bare her heart to Deeks. So which is easier? Admitting to an error at work or accept that you’ve hurt the feelings of someone for which you care? The prior is mostly objective; the latter opens up a vault of uncomfortable vulnerability. In the afternoon she selflessly acted-out to help her partner; in the morning she selfishly reacted out of personal hurt. She is able to somewhat casually accept her professional responsibility, more so than personal blame.

Like Kensi, I hold her to incredibly high standards. However, minus a heart-felt apology or even some unspoken effort to make amends with Deeks, I was left overwhelmingly disappointed. Apparently there’s still room for some needed personal growth for Ms. Blye.

Kensi exits the building and approaches Deeks as Thapa is loaded into the ambulance. DEEKS: Walking toward her, He lost a lot of blood but he'll live. Gurkhas-- believe the hype. KENSI: Deeks... DEEKS: I'm gonna go with him to the hospital. He turns, but Kensi yells to halt his departure. KENSI: Urgently, No, hey, whoa, please, let me just--I just want to say something. DEEKS: Yeah. He distractedly looks back to the ambulance. KENSI: Resolutely, We're gonna figure this out. With a glint of hope in her eyes, All we got to do is talk about it.

DEEKS: Momentarily considering, Okay, but you don't, you don't really like the talking… about it.

KENSI: Her direct gaze and tone will him to believe her. Yeah, but I promise I'll be better at talking about this.

DEEKS: Seeking clarification, What do you, what do you mean by "this"? KENSI: As if obvious, This... Slightly embarrassed, you know. DEEKS: With a teasing drawl, This “thing”?

KENSI: Avoiding eye contact (at all costs), Yes, our... thing.

DEEKS: Goading, I'm sorry, just--I didn't, I didn't hear you 'cause there were so many people walking by. If you could just maybe say it louder just for me. Just once, just say it. KENSI: Attempting to cover her amusement, I hate you.

DEEKS: Gleefully relishing in her apparent discomfort, You don't, you don't, you don't hate me.

KENSI: With a knowing grin, Our thing.

DEEKS: Wow. He takes a much needed and notable centering breath at the admission - & its implications.

He looks at her tenderly. KENSI: Definitively, You have to promise me something, too, though. DEEKS: Easily, Anything. KENSI: Gauging, Promise you'll be patient with me? Deeks offers a gentle grin.

PARAMEDIC: Interrupting, Yo, got to roll. KENSI: Inquiring, See you tonight? DEEKS: Simply, Yeah. He moves toward the ambulance and turns back to her, You do me a favor, Fern? KENSI: Immediately decisive, Anything. DEEKS: Can you burn that shirt for me? She grins, taking her own cleansing breath as he departs.

With the “case closed”, Deeks is genuinely relieved to have saved Thapa, likely inspired by his driven warrior spirit and wise mentoring to the ways of the broader world (seemingly including women)! Speaking of world and women, the weight of the past day has finally taken its toll on Kensi. In the morning she pushed him away only to be professionally separated from him in a time of real need, having almost lost him (yet again).

Perhaps it’s now that Kensi realizes what that loss would truly mean to her, something Deeks has probably long considered in relation to her. She fought it for so long, but can no longer simply categorize Deeks as “just her work partner”. With that look while voluntarily rising from the restaurant table, she actively advanced Densi and it’s something she can no longer deny or hide from. With just the day’s events, she driven to finally voice her inner thoughts.

It’s a noteworthy achievement as Kensi verbally expresses herself to Deeks. Again! Twice in the same day! How long have we waited and wondered if/when and what would prompt Kensi’s words to be described as “heart-felt”? Hallelujah! I for one was beginning to question if her teary plea of “Promise me you’ll never do that. Get yourself killed.” from “Wanted” (4x17) was a pipedream.

Clearly Kensi had been considering this conversation most of the day, especially being forced to sit and stew in the SUV. We know when this woman decides to do something she’s going to do it. (The only thing that ever usually stops her is herself.) When she tells Deeks they just need to “talk about it”, it’s as if she’s giving an encouraging pep talk to herself. (Yes, Kensi. You need to talk to him! Don’t you remember your frustration of him not doing the same at the end of Season 4?!)

Always keenly able to read his partner, Deeks responds to her cautiously. Now it’s the detective who needs reassurance of her words and commitment. He’s trying to envision how this might play out, how to prepare for this new venture (for both of them). Is he to really believe closed-off Kensi will suddenly emerge as a Chatty Cathy? Then, uttering her word as her bond, it’s Kensi making a promise to Deeks. (Whoa. Now that was brave. We and she know he’s going to hold her to this. She basically just openly presented Deeks with “ammunition” to use against her in the future. Not that he would. At least not maliciously.)

Yes, the words are direct and dominant, but it’s the force and power Daniela delivers as Kensi that punctuates her commitment. Again, Kensi is making as much a promise to herself as she is to Deeks. Yes this will improve their ‘ship, but more broadly this is her striving to be a better overall person. It will benefit all of her ‘ships, not only the one she has with her partner.

Then the magic of ECO’s performance expertly drives Deeks down the centerline between his personal uncertainty and easing the tense conversation with a dose of humor. Just as Kensi had fumed at him at the end of Season 4 for not saying what he means, it’s now the former lawyer who requires specific interpretation of her vague use of the term “this”.

The man has had a dreadful day, the pinnacle of which included a right hook from his lady bird. (And you do not want her “flapping her wings”!) Forget all the years leading up to this (as if we ever could or would actually want to), Deeks feels the weight of this conversation, of how it could categorically change their “thing”. The normally laid-back surfer is anything but here. Yes, Kensi is beautifully complex, but that complexity often produces considerable confusion. (Apparently we women are prone to this – at least in the minds of most men.) He takes no risks here; he needs clarity.

He also needs to lighten the mood! To keep Kensi comfortable and sharing, he works to lessen the significance of this conversation for her (and probably a little for himself as well). He takes her offered “this” and carefully yet brazenly mocks her with it! He knows what she means. She knows that he knows. And he knows that she knows that he knows! (*These two idiots.*) While his mind guards against getting his hopes up, it needs to hear the sincere words from her even though his heart understands the gaze and tone from his Fern.

His question about “this” challenges her, but it’s something she struggles to admit she admires about him. While Kick Ass Kensi and Bad Ass Blye can too easily send the boys running… not him. Never him. His steadfast devotion to her has become a comfort she didn’t realize she longed for, something she likely didn’t believe she could have again, perhaps something she’d come to believe she was unworthy of. So she doesn’t refute his effort. Has no thought of distracting him from the topic at hand (she started it, after all). Doesn’t run away. Daniela gives us a Kensi who is internally battling herself. It’s one of the few times (if ever) we’ve witnessed a public expression of the truly vulnerable embarrassed aspects deeply hidden within the core of Kensi. I can almost see the innocent little girl that existed prior to all the losses and heartache that fate has so cruelly dealt her. Her typical responses would be so easy, so comfortable. Yet she remains rooted, looking to her partner, willing him to let her “off the hook”.

No way. Deeks has complete faith in her, returning her willful effort back at her. He spies his mark and just like his partner’s exact sniper skills, isn’t going to let his target out of his caring crosshairs. He’s made her twist in the wind long enough and just can’t help himself. His seemingly unending patience has run out as he charmingly finally let’s her off the hook. He does so by doing what he does best, one of the many things she begrudgingly adores about him: he simultaneously annoys and amuses her through his provocative caricature of one of their many private jokes of “their ‘thing’”. (The purposeful application of his distinctive “drawl” on makes it - & him – only that much more endearing.)

He’d been carefully and strategically inching closer and closer to it, approaching Kensi as if she might suddenly engage her “fight or flight” response for which she’s so famously known. He needs this clarity, is unable and unwilling to move on without it. He corners her on it because he knows it’s actually what she’s striving for as well. He knows she’s finally ready, that she needs to say it as much as he needs to hear it.

As uncomfortable and scary as this is, Kensi wants to say it. She likely still wonders what will transpire as a result, but it’s now a risk she’s willing to accept. They can’t keep existing in this self-imposed purgatory, the latest of which she’s mostly to blame. So I’ll apply this statement again here, she has possibly truly started “focusing on what could go right instead of what might go wrong.” This federal agent who has steeled her mind, body, and soul preemptively against threats, must inherently long for a release from her self-assigned prison. What might it feel like to be free? To follow the whims of her excited heart?

She finally utters what they have both needed. Something she so easily teased him about way back in “The Debt” (3x10) – their “thing”. (By the way, can anyone truly pinpoint the time in which Deeks stopped declaring “There is no thing”? Yeh, no one ever believed that. Not even him.) She’s still insecure as she nervously avoids any hint of direct eye contact, but since he had already voiced “their thing”, it’s slightly easier for her to simply affirm the fact. She did it!

Deeks is stunned, but in only the best way. Yet he’s like a kid who was just given a small piece of candy - & now only wants to gorge himself on the entire bag! Always seeing what he can get (away with), he make an effort to get “more”! Yet it’s only a cover for honestly letting Kensi “off the hook” and keeping it light, as he incites her to repeat the momentous admission. Still, he’s not honestly after the “entire bag of candy”, just one more piece. For him to relish in her words one more time. (This is also an effort to ensure the words she declared are the words he heard! What a travesty if he’d misinterpreted or had only imagined that heart-soaring confession!)

Knowing Deeks is honestly teasing, but exasperated he’s using her vulnerability and this substantial moment against her and for his own entertainment, she shuts him down. Or at least tries. (Bet Daniela had no problem delivering that provoking “hate” line!) Kensi’s assertion of hating him is so insincere, they both can’t control the giddy smiles they each exhibit.

Deeks contradicts her assertion not once, but thrice! In his pointed statements, he’s countering her with words, but the sentiment is purely positive. He’s telling himself she doesn’t hate him. He’s willing her that she doesn’t hate him. But it’s all so much more than that. With these two often residing in “Opposite Ville”, the contrasting meaning of hate is the true intent here.

Remarkably, she complies to his basic request and repeats her admission of their “thing”. Maybe if he can keep getting her to say it/if she keeps saying it, it will become easier for her to not only believe it, but believe in it, in them. (Practice makes perfect, right? Maybe we should add this to their routine training exercises!)

She looked him directly in the eyes and said it. No interruptions (yet). No pretense. No cover. She’s seriously not only back on-board their ‘ship, but helping to guide it now. (I can just hear Deeks’ mind stutter over, “Ok. This is happening!”) Much like the shock he must have endured the night at the restaurant (which remarkably was less than 24 hours prior!) during which everything spectacularly fell apart, they are not only back, but now much stronger. (And THIS is why I had ranted about them individually or together not being ready to cross certain lines at the end of “Recovery”! Ha! Introspection and mature, adult communication was necessary! Well, this is as close as we will likely get to that in relation to these two!)

This pivotal moment and the resulting shift of “them” hit Deeks as he offers a wide-eyed look with his now-telling grounding breath. Quickly disregarding his own reaction, he tenderly looks to Kensi, appreciating her effort that has allowed them to discover this new standing. This, rather than the physically grappling expert sniper, is his brave, bad ass/kick ass Wonder Woman. He knows what a challenge this was for her to overcome and displays his pride in her.

His accepting and comforting response provides Kensi a sense of security to maintain her vulnerable manner. Going against everything the world has ruthlessly taught her to protect herself against, she remains open to her partner, faithfully placing her future with him within his power. To viewers, it’s simplistically sweet when Kensi poses a question to Deeks, fearful of his rejection. How can she still not realize he is genuinely powerless to deny her anything? And “anything” is his determined, yet relaxed response.

Still treading lightly, she pleads for his patience with her. (Seriously, Kensi? What do you think the man has been for the past three-plus years?!) Her inquiry demonstrates her inability or disbelief this has been the case all along. Deeks’ grin provides the unspoken answer she needs. To Deeks, he must be amused that she somehow hasn’t discovered his long-held (not so) secret: he can just keep doing what he’s been doing all this time. The approach works. Simply, “if it ain’t broke, don’t try to fix it”! So now it’s Deeks making a silent promise to his partner.

Luckily, they made it through all of that before the inevitable interruption reared its ugly head! (I’m looking at you paramedic! Although those interruptions are (begrudgingly) needed. Apparently some silly people don’t appreciate an episode focused solely on Densi. I just don’t understand that!)

Needing reassurance, Kensi maintains her connection to Deeks by looking to the future, even if it’s only that evening. Recognizing she’s in a more secure state, he poses a request of his own to her. In yet another sign of her dedication to him/them, she instantly parrots his resolute response from only moments earlier. Without hesitation or consideration, she responds with her own, “Anything.” (This is a new side to Kensi indeed!)

His query, however, holds no genuine significance as he teases her about burning the shirt. (This was a parting attempt at humor that I frankly didn’t appreciate. Yes, he’s probably referencing the fact that her appearance in the same shirt two days in a row was the ultimate tell about their ‘ship which made its reality indisputable to the rest of the team. Not to mention all of the options outlined at the beginning of this post regarding her failure to change clothes. So instead of ranting more about this, I’ll lounge in the splendor of this scene, these two messed-up lovely people, and the pivotal advancement they’ve just agreed to with each other!)

Traveling to the hospital via ambulance, THALA: With appreciation, You saw good in me when I could not even see it in myself. I will never forget that, Sahib. DEEKS: Thoughtfully, You know, you actually started to tell me something back at the airstrip. You started to tell me the only way to cross a frozen lake. THAPA: With a knowing grin, Do not run. Walk slowly. Stop to look at everything. Take your time. She will wait for you.

DEEKS: With a satisfied grin, Okay…

Even in facing almost certain death, although likely something he does on a regular basis, it’s unlikely Thapa has had to rely on someone else, particularly a near stranger, to rescue him. With his wise spirit he clearly understands and accepts the interconnectedness of humanity. Thapa’s words, something we quickly realize, serve as a mirror for Deeks. The detective has his own heart-felt appreciation for those who see the good in him, even when he can’t acknowledge or accept it for himself. In relation to Densi, it’s Kensi’s willingness to have him as her “boyfriend”, to be part of their “thing”, that indicates this spectacular woman somehow, someway also sees the good in him. Something that should certainly leave him breathless.

The events of these last few moments with this powerful sage and his more-than-just-a-partner, along with the happenings of the day, combine to remind Deeks of the parable presented to him: The Frozen Lake. He’s salvaged his professional reputation with the case. Magically, Kensi has cautiously continued their involvement. Now Deeks goes for broke, seeking a lasting answer to the ongoing quandary of his (hopefully) long-term ‘ship with Kensi.

Thapa being a Gurkha, husband, and father instantly surmises Deeks’ reference. (I mean who can be around Deeks for even the briefest time and not discover he has a “thing” for his partner?!) Thapa calmly relates the missing pieces to Deeks’ puzzling ‘ship, which the detective both understands and deeply values.

*Author request* Ok people, I need some help here. Earlier Kensi asked Deeks’ for HIS patience. But now Thapa’s frozen lake advice refers to Kensi waiting for HIM? I was very confused. I hadn’t noticed Deeks being hesitant to advance their ‘ship (not yet). What did I miss? So I just asked BFF Kara what she made of this. Her response centered on the fact that Kensi slamming on the breaks of their ‘ship probably made Deeks give it more thought as well. “Up until this relationship, he hasn’t wanted to share anything personal of himself, he’s just hiding behind jokes and stuff. They were both struggling.” she said. What do you all think about this? Are Thapa’s words hitting home on Deeks own self-loathing? Help me put my own puzzle pieces together!

*An hour later...* What was I thinking?! Of course Deeks had struggled with his own hesitancy with Kensi! How had I so quickly forgotten (especially since I even referenced it earlier in this post) those very instances. He couldn’t find the courage or proper words to respond to Kensi’s demands post-Monica at the end of “Parley” (4x23)/beginning of “Decent” (4x24). How could I forget that endless cycle of “I’m good/you’re good/say what you mean”?! Then there’s also the surmised withdrawal Deeks had from Kensi post-torture. This missing piece of the puzzle makes everything clear now.

In the bullpen Callen, Sam, and Kensi work to head home, when Granger announces Kensi’s immediate re-assignment. Kensi restrains her initial disbelief, inquiring to Hetty for confirmation. Hetty responds by gifting Kensi with a clean shirt. KENSI: Referring to Granger, Why is he doing that?

HETTY: Explaining, He's not. I am.

Why, Hetty, why?! (Honestly this episode was so good - up to this point - I’d forgotten this inevitability was on the horizon. It takes a lot to distract and maintain my focus away from a future known and upcoming event. This only happens as a result of high-quality writing, directing, producing, and acting by the entire cast and crew. Bravo to all! Which only makes the current situation that much more heart-breaking. Sadface.)

The team is at a loss as Granger prompts Kensi’s quick departure. She receives a text from Deeks, “I’m almost there.” Aggravated, she follows the order begrudgingly.

No. Noooooo! Stop! Don’t leave Deeks! Not now! This is a time I really wish we’d been given an obstinate, rule-breaking, rogue Kensi. It was as if our ‘ship hit an unseen iceberg under the cover of the blackest night sky. And if anyone was going to recognize a Titanic-inspired incident, it’s Kensi!

The guys directly question Hetty. SAM: What's this about, Hetty? HETTY: Raising her hands defensively, "Need to know," gentlemen.

CALLEN: Accusing, You ever gonna stop moving us around like pieces in a chess game?

HETTY: Emotionlessly, I don't move pieces, Mr. Callen. I move the board. She offers a friendly grin as she backs away. Good night.

The cryptic Miss Lange holds them all at bay. Again. It was comforting and encouraging to see Callen, Hetty’s undisputed favorite and the one most expected to defend their leader, swiftly communicate his reproach, knowing of her regular devious scheming. (Oh, did I take that a bit too far? This is the problem in knowing how this storyline continues. #notsorry) So what I should have supposed was more aligned with a possible connection to the mysterious “White Ghost” operation. (Hint. Hint.) Anyway, even Callen and Sam lightly express their own frustration as well as on behalf of their young female agent (& her partner).

The all powerful Hetty doesn’t back down or even pretend to be even the slightest bit remorseful for her decision. In fact, she merely doubles down! Pieces? Pish posh! As the elder and seasoned operations manager she runs the entire board. Her parting grin is intended to put the men at ease. Instead it feels more like Hetty is supremely and satisfyingly taunting them for her own pleasure. (Seriously? We know how conniving Hetty can be, but against her own team? What has this woman turn into and why? Only the gifted talents of Linda Hunt could make us turn on a dime, so suddenly withdrawing our adoration for Hetty.)

Soon after the guys exit Deeks hastily arrives. DEEKS: Infusing humor, Oh, come on, I break every traffic law on the planet to get here and she already left? HETTY: With a hint of caution, Your partner's been reassigned, Mr. Deeks. DEEKS: Perplexed, What do you mean? What do you mean, reassigned?

HETTY: A classified mission. DEEKS: Attempting to understand, A c-classified mission for how long? HETTY: Indefinitely. DEEKS: He steals a strained breath, finally looking back to Hetty. Indefinitely. HETTY: Affirming, Mm-hmm. Deeks handles Kensi’s knife in his hands. HETTY: Suspecting, That looks familiar. DEEKS: Forlornly, It was her dad's.

HETTY: Impressed, Well, that is quite a gift. DEEKS: Quietly (accepting the gravity of its true meaning), Yeah. Looking to Hetty, he repeats Kensi’s description. Well, sometimes a knife is just a knife. HETTY: Reassuring, And now she's entrusted it to you. With a knowing grin, Hetty returns to her office. DEEKS: Shifting into work mode, Anything else I should know, Hetty? HETTY: Button up, Mr. Deeks. It's cold out there.

He gazes to the side despondently. ♫ [The song “Landslide” begins to play.] ♫ Deeks quickly exhales, then takes another noticeable breath as he continues to consider all of the facets and repercussions of the situation before turning to leave. As he exits, we spy the telltale worried scratch of his head….

Deeks reveals his eagerness to return to Kensi, to continue their new-found, mutually-beneficial communication, as he hurriedly returns to the Mission. (Does Deeks only break traffic laws to get to Kensi, or is this an established habit? He is a cop, so who knows.) Hetty gets straight to the point in breaking the heart-stopping news to the liaison. Never has there been a more appropriate situation deserving of a “Poor Deeks”.

He tries to discern Hetty’s meaning, something that’s usually a losing battle. What does she mean by reassigned? To where? Why? It’s classified. (I’d usually blame this on Deeks’ liaison status, but since she told the guys the same thing, I’ll accept it as neutrally as they did.) This is already tough news to tolerate, but when timeline is presented as “indefinite”, this is likely the final straw for Deeks on this most demanding day. His burdened draw of a tense breath indicates the weight of his current reality.

At this point Deeks is literally grasping at one of his sole remaining connections to Kensi – the knife she generously armed him with. When Deeks reveals the knife was previously possessed by Kensi’s father, compounded with the bittersweet defeated tone depicted by ECO, all the breath left my body - as though the weight of the world now teetered on my slight shoulders. Apparently Dave Kalstein at some point explained Deeks’ thoughts at this moment, “He doesn’t know whether to laugh, cry or shoot someone.” (Yeh, that sounds about right.)

(As I’ve disclosed in the past, I share the trauma of having lost my father at a relatively early age, much like Kensi. So I know first-hand as a “daddy’s girl” what a material possession from a loved one can mean in trying to work through the grief and appreciating the times and experienced with that person. Times that can never be relived and experiences that are now considered so cherished, so very precious. As an example, I have my father’s watch that I had originally gifted to him. I can barely conceive of a situation in which I would voluntarily gift it to someone else, what an immense circumstance it would have to be, but more so, the undefinable, doubtless, and infinite bond required to have with that person.)

Even Hetty understands the significance of Kensi having presented Deeks with the blade that holds such meaning. In her reference, Deeks too obviously values the weapon for far more that its defensive origin. (Wouldn’t we all have treasured learning when and how Deeks came to know this information? Did Kensi factually communicate the detail she obtained the knife from her father in passing or was it shared with her partner in a bonding effort? Did Don purposefully give the knife to Kensi as a tool to keep her safe or did she inherit it upon his tragic death? While all of these specifics would be nice to know as a broader insight into Kensi’s character, the choice to present it from a dejected, powerless Deeks made the revelation supremely effective in affecting viewers.

The knife having been Mr. Blye’s makes perfect sense, but through this storytelling it wasn’t something easily speculated. The lack of foreshadowing made the disclosure that much more impactful. We felt the sorrow of Deeks due to Kensi’s absence and how holding the valued knife resulted in conflicting aspects of comfort and pain.) This was an exceptional set of choices made by Mr. Kalstein. Bravo.

Deeks tries to diminish the significance of the knife and Kensi’s gift of it, but Hetty knows better. Deeks knows better, but is simply too aggrieved to admit it. Thus, he deflects Hetty to the “objective” matter of Kensi’s operation. Hetty responds only with an expected and puzzling bit of seemingly useless advice. Knowing the subject is now closed, the man is alone with his thoughts and likely overpowering emotions. As he leaves he displays a telling scratch to his head indicating discomfort and worry.

Sidenote: At the closing the recognizable tune of “Landslide” is prominent. This is a song I have no issue in imparting my dislike. However, it’s not really the song that’s the issue for me. The value of a song (with words) is its lyrics, which in this case fit the Densi ‘ship and Deeks departing mood quite well. I just happen to not care for this singer, who sounds far too similar to the originators Fleetwood Mac for my taste. It’s an issue Dave Kalstein openly stated was a questionable choice. Anytime you choose a popular tune, people have already likely attached their own emotions and experiences to it, which detracts from the storytelling of the episode. In the end, for me, it wasn’t necessary; we already grasp the depth of Deeks’ torment from the story itself through the brilliantly sincere acting of ECO.

------------------------------------------ This analysis has already exceeded the acceptable length of a post and most certainly all of your patience in attempting to reach its seemingly unreachable end. I can only hesitantly hope this post has brought a moment’s reflection of positive consideration of our favorite ‘ships pivotal advancement. I know “The Frozen Lake” evoked many varied responses regarding the current status of Densi and marked the “Season of Kalstein Metaphors”. I for one obviously appreciated nearly (but not all) of what we were presented in this episode.

I was compelled by Kalstein’s trilogy of careful selection for Densi’s interactions, action-packed case, and the use of Thapa to drive both, as well as the seasoned direction of JPK, who likely brought out the best in all of them. This is a formidable undertaking when limited to only 42 minutes! Daniela and ECO both just simply “brought it”. Internal to each of their characters and challenged by each other in different ways, they each expressed a wide variety and depth of emotions. Daniela showed us an anxious, angry, tormented, nervous, impulsive, playful, and determined Kensi. ECO demonstrated Deeks struggling with apprehension, fear, restraint, confusion, mockery, segmentation, aggression, concern, hope, joy, and sorrow. The complexity of each trying to maintain control of their own emotions while handling the ever-changing expressions of their partner was a sight to behold.

While each JPK, Kalstein, Ruah, and Olsen fulfill their individually assigned roles magnificently, it’s LL Cool J’s theme of “teamwork makes the dream work” that encapsulates the unquestionable excellence of this show. Each is great; together they’re better.

Series counts

Really?! = 65 (Deeks 54, Kensi 11)

Shoulder punches – 7

Butt grabs/slaps – 4 (Deeks 1, Kensi 3)

Done/On it – 23

Touché – 23 (+1 Deeks to Hetty)

Deeks nicknames for Kensi = Fern, Tonto, My Sweet, Princess, Kitty Cat, Sunshine, Wonder Woman, Tiger (x2), Wikipedia (from Ray), Killer, Lassie?, Wifey, Light of my life, Sugar Bear, Bad Ass Blye (3x20), Hun Bun, Honey, Babe, Darlin’, Shnookums, Dora the Explorer, Krafty, Kensalina (x5), Pocahontas, Honey, Sweetie,

Nicknames for Deeks = Temp (Sam), Huckleberry (Sam), Beaver (Callen), Diesel, D-Unit, D-Rock, Shaggy (Sam, Kensi x 3, Hippie Guy x 2, Food Truck guy, ), Space Cadet (Sam), Razor?, Mutt (Sam), Alpha (Sam), Shaggy Boy (Kensi), Stumbles, Hubby, Einstein (4x2), Tiger (Callen), Beach Boy, Counselor, Apollo, Rover, Cowboy, Goat Boy

Interruptions – 6 (Paulina, Sam, Nell, Eric, Callen, Paramedic)

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