#nedaweek2017

[naylien]

In honor of #NEDAawareness week, I'm posting this belly pic I took the other day. When I was in the height of my eating disorder, I never would have posted a picture like this, let alone take it. But part of my recovery journey is allowing myself to ENJOY eating, and I definitely enjoyed all that pizza I ate 😄 #foodbaby #edrecovery #bopo #nedaweek2017

[livinghappilyeverafter]

hey pals. new podcast this week with my friend & super talented musician @mistyboyce we talk about all sorts of things in this long conversation & we vulnerably discuss our shared experience with food & body issues, healing this, healing it again ...and again and again .... and being okay with where we're at. It's a fitting episode this week because it's week National Eating Disorders Awareness Week ( @neda ) and while I've been vocal about my many issues in this arena for years now, I'm still talking about it because it's ongoing and if my work can help anyone feel a little less alone that would be cool. Link to the episode is in my bio & misty is THE coolest and we talk about way more than body image so give it a listen, she's the best. #nedawareness #nedaweek2017 #letitoutpod #mistyboyce

[asongofmyself]

Today I wonder where and when we learn to despise and distrust bodies, whether of ourselves or of others. At what age a sense of faux modesty becomes interchangeable with the shame of holding weight. // What I learn at age 15 in the locker room of the YMCA is that naked old women's bodies are disgusting, that these sagging ladies in just a towel or flip flops are a disgrace. That they lost their youthful beauty, and should be hiding themselves accordingly. These are the spoken lessons, in a language of high pitched snickers and low volume whispers. In complaining to their mothers, in getting a sign on the door asking all patrons to remain modest. But what I learn inaudibly, subconsciously, is that fitting into a size 26 swimsuit makes me worthwhile in this world, even if I am not the best swimmer. What I really learn is that if you do not fit within the label of beauty, no one wants you to be seen. By 17 I lose sight of myself. // I wonder this in the locker room of the NYSC at Columbus Circle, now at age 22, noticing the way the lighting makes my ab muscles look more defined than they are, even after a workout. Noticing that I am among the few in this locker room in a non form fitting shirt. Remembering my first day in this gym, covering myself with a towel and fighting to keep it up. Admiring the confidence of the women who bared all around me. Remembering the second day, stripping down with the rest of them and walking efficiently to the shower. Reminding myself that to love every woman's body is to love my own too. #NEDAwareness #NEDAWeek2017 (at Freehold YMCA)