Squonk
RARITY: ★★☆☆☆ | THREAT: ★☆☆☆☆ SIZE: Labrador retriever-sized.
HABITAT:
Woods, though sometimes they wander into town and may be kept by people. There seems to be a mysterious “squonk breeding program” that delivers squonks to those who don’t expect them.
OVERVIEW:
The squonk is found in hemlock and coniferous forests throughout much of the New England and Mid-Atlantic regions of the United States, as well as parts of Canada. It was first described by lumberjacks at the turn of the 20th century. About the size of a Labrador retriever, squonks waddle through the woods, scrounging for pinecones to eat. They’re hairless creatures, and their skin is ill-fitted and covered in blemishes and warts. You can often hear one approaching by the slapping sounds of its skin flaps and wrinkles flapping together with each step it takes.
Due to their ugly appearance and self-awareness, squonks are solitary creatures. They are almost always seen weeping as a consequence of their fragile self-image, and can be found by following the path of their tears through the woods. Their temperament is highly fearful and timid, but they are sweet-natured and can take particular liking to a kind individual who doesn’t flinch at their appearance. Baby squonks are sometimes abandoned by their parents because the parents find their offspring ugly. These pups can make gentle pets but will be afraid of almost everything. Squonks eat pine cones and only pine cones.
Squonks have a lot of genetic variation, and each population may have its quirks. Theoretically, domestically bred squonks could look and act very different from one another. But who would waste their time breeding squonks?
One artist by the name of Kerry Zimmerman was once famed for his beautiful New England landscape paintings. Today, he exclusively paints squonks, calling them his “muse”. Actually, his muse is truly a muse, and he became bound to only paint these hideously ugly creatures. The muse thought it was funny. The museums that used to feature Zimmerman’s work did not. There are thousands of his squonk paintings out there because of this, but few people want them.
ABILITIES:
Squonks’ skin, though gross-looking, serves as decent protection against the bites and strikes of other creatures, as they may have a hard time gaining purchase on the squonk.
When trapped, squonks have been known to dissolve entirely into tears and a thick, goopy material. It is not known whether they’re capable of reforming after this. Those with pet squonks generally live in fear of this happening to their pet since they might not come back.
Squonks are unharmed by most magic, but being around magical energies corrupts their form (See OTHER VARIANTS: Nuppeppo).
WEAKNESSES:
Squonks have little to no offensive capabilities, but they also don’t tend to cause trouble for people, and would prefer to run away from and avoid a threat.
Should someone want to harvest a squonk for their skin or tears (useful potion ingredients), it’s recommended they stun the creature before it has the chance to dissolve.
Squonks will begin sobbing if they catch a glimpse of themselves on a reflective surface.
VARIANTS
SQK:
What would a squonk look like without wrinkles? Worse. More horrifying than ugly, though certainly both. Sqks (pronounced “squicks”) are a wrinkle-less variety of squonk, but their skin is instead lacking in all substance, and clings to the bones and organs of the creature making it look emaciated with grimacing teeth. They share most of their behavior with their creased cousins, being quite docile and fearful, but are often mistaken for something really threatening due to their appearance. If you claim your pet squonk is a shar-pei dog, you’ll probably need to claim a sqk is a small, hoofless and starving horse.
FLAPPIN’ FLAN:
It’s unknown whether Flappin’ Flann is the last individual of a now-extinct subspecies, or just an unusual and very large squonk. What is known is that Flann is the exception to the rule of the gentle and sensitive disposition of the species. Flann flaps all around the woods, the size of a ridiculously wrinkly elephant, looking for hikers or others spending time outdoors. While Flappin’ Flann isn’t interested in eating anyone, it seems to get some perverse enjoyment out of trapping people in its innumerable wrinkles until they suffocate to death under the weight, gasping for air. Some have had the unfortunate experience of watching Flann shake itself out like a wet dog, causing human remains to fly in every direction. There is almost always a bounty on Flappin’ Flann, but the creature proves to be elusive when it’s least convenient.
NUPPEPPO:
When magical energies are combined with a squonk, the result is a nuppeppo. These can arise from a squonk simply being near magic being practiced, walking on magically charged land, or the intentional casting of a spell on a squonk. Upon this transformation, they become covered in even more grotesque wrinkles and folds, their skin puckering and flapping as it moves. They also become bipedal, and lack all facial anatomy and sensory organs, though seem capable of clumsily getting around. Nuppeppo will wander aimlessly through towns, cemeteries, and forests. They spread a scent of rotting flesh, which may actually be the stench of bacteria growing in their folds. Physical contact with these fleshy abominations will cause those who touch it to have profusely wrinkled skin, which goes away by itself after days or weeks. If you’re looking to revert your pet from a nuppeppo back to a squonk, you need to confine it in an area with no access to magical energies for several weeks.
(Art credit: Carliihde on dA)