Discover Top Posts Tagged with #newkindoflove

Sudden catch!! 😍😍 #jaguar #jaguarxe #feastfortheeyes #feastformycamera #guesstheplace #newkindoflove #carsofinstagram #carlovers #luxurycars

#jaguarxe #carsofinstagram #feastfortheeyes #newkindoflove #guesstheplace #feastformycamera #luxurycars #carlovers #jaguar

#dress #edithhead #cocktaildress #joannewoodward #newkindoflove #bendigoartgallery #designer #costumedesigner #hollywood (at Bendigo Art Gallery)

#costumedesigner #hollywood #bendigoartgallery #designer #newkindoflove #cocktaildress #dress #joannewoodward #edithhead

I know that you know that i know Axel&teddie #newkindoflove #pretending #imnothere #cat&dog (at Stamp Hair)

#cat #imnothere #pretending #newkindoflove

07.12.15: Fast and Gentle Wanting

After filing into the small black box theater, taking in this new space that would become a hallowed ground of growth, I waited for orientation to start. Standing out of the way of the commotion of my classmates, I let my mind wander into blankness. I was in a sort of meditative state, I had assumed the role of a block of marble, waiting to take shape with the help of the master carvers I was about to meet. I drifted farther into the white walls of my mind, content living there, standing with myself inside myself—unmarked, clean, and new.

I was entirely ready and completely unprepared. Leaning up against the mildly tattered the pillar of the black box, waiting for nothing, passing the moments, living in the space. I was exeisting on my own and so completely unprepared. That’s what made it full; I had no anticipation of it and no expectation for it.

Focused, innocently singleminded, childlike and ready for life, truly The Clown in actuality, someone made their cue. The anticipation of the compression of the panic bar sounded like the echo of a faint knock on a wooden door in the distance. The door swayed open, pushed with one sole purpose. This blueshirted and blueshoed figure crossed the threshold into my borrowed and shared space.

Our eyes lifted. We caught a gaze and held it captive. I was immediately flooded with something faintly familiar. I was drowning in this flood, happily flailing in its crashing waves, surrendering to the vacuum of its fatal riptides; all while reveling in its presence. Each millisecond caressed me into deeper intoxication. The most sensual thriller of all time. It was the definition of “rock it ‘til waterfalls.” The crecendo of my life. The feeling you imagine you have when you reach out your hand and make-believe it is held by someone else. I could eat a feast off that stare. It nourished parts of me I didn’t know existed. I learned there is enough water in the wells of eyes to quench the thirst of an eternity, enough richness in tone to make all the world kings.

Our eyes rose, and I was there. I think it was a gift to us both. A changing singular experience. It’s something to know in your core, feeling someone else without a touch. A fast and gentle wanting. A wanting of this uncharted world. This new sense of something you thought you might have known. It was a delightful correction, our mutual stare changed my perspective on what there was to desire.

Did I find it then? Did I get all I ever needed? Was that the end, the one for me and mine alone?

The only problem is, he was a man. And I am still stuck, trapped here as a girl. Forever more mature than my age gives me an allowance for.

#newkindoflove #writting #love #new experiences #blue eyes #falls in love #Eloise