My Official Last Post:
Hey, I haven't posted in a while. This will be my last post, at least to here. After all this time, I do feel like I owe some explanations/reasons behind things that happened. In this post, I will be going over some stuff that happened leading up to me leaving, and also things that have happened after.
Things I will go over
Why I left
My old description, the issues that people had with it, and my apology
My old friend Citrus (Now deactivated)
My server
A quick bit of advice, from me to you
My last farewell
Why I left
I just made it into college this past September. I was excited, and nervous. The week that I got there, unfortunately issues started to arise here (Which I will go over further along in this post), in addition to also having just having a fall out with someone I deemed close to me. I got extremely anxious because of this, even so far as to having many shaking spells, and having anxiety attacks. All of this added up, and I had to choose between school, and this. Ultimately, I chose school, and for my own mental health decided that I had to stop posting, and even existing on here.
This, unfortunately, was not the first time I had gotten this anxious over issues on here, which is why even after settling in, and having time to come back after it cooled down, I chose to stay away. It is taking quite a lot to even come back here to type this out, but again I do believe that you guys deserve to know the truth, especially with all the support and kindness shown towards me over my time spent on this app.
My old description, the issues that people had with it, and my apology
Do note that if anyone has a screenshot of this, I would love to add it here as a visualization. However unfortunately in the panic, I had not saved it in any way before hastily deleting and re-wording it.
When I first wrote my description, I thought what I was conveying is that, in regards to my own posts, I will not monitor them heavily. But I pointed out that if I were to see any of the easy to see red flags, such as an obvious NSFW account, or if it was tagged with anything inappropriate/kink related, then they would be blocked and/or asked to take it down. I also had a portion I distinctly remember that said something along the line of "If I see you, I will block you"
Unfortunately, and what I do apologize profusely for, it did not seem to communicate that to others. To many, it was interpreted as that I do not care if NSFW/Kink accounts invade SFW spaces, and that in posts where I drew for, or contained others, that they could disregard the other persons/peoples DNI, and interact anyway. In addition, people understood it as I was actively allowing these accounts to run rampant on my profile.
Again, although this is nothing anywhere near what I wanted to communicate, this is what ended up being communicated. For this, I would like you to have my deepest apologies, and to understand this was not my intention, despite the outcome. Unfortunately, I cannot go back in time to fix this sooner than I did. However when it was brought up, and once I understood how easily misunderstood it was, I did try to change it to more properly communicate what I had wanted it to. I cant undo the damage done regarding that, but I can offer my apologies.
My old friend Citrus (Now deactivated)
Many people seemed to be under the idea that when I joined Tumblr I was 18. I was not, rather I was in fact 16. As of this moment, I am 18. Again, however, when I first had met Citrus (Citruskiddo), they were 14 and I was 16 years old.
The reason I did not have my age stated outright was because I had been taught not to outright put my age on my social media, for safety reasons. However I would like to make it known I did not outright hide my age. Although I never put it in posts, or in my BIO, I would answer honestly to those who asked in DM's or Discord messages.
My server
Another thing people seem to have an issue with is my server.
I understand why some may have an issue, but for your peace of mind I would like to tell you some safety rules I have set in place for the server.
I personally read every message sent in the server. I do not rely on bots, nor other mods. I take time out of my day to monitor every part of the server.
I understand that threads are harder to monitor, which is why I have a channel dedicated to making them, that way I can also look through those, without fear of missing them.
I have multiple ways to reach me, one being anonymously, to bring up any questions, concerns, or issues.
I also do not allow people into the server unless I get the ok from the server, or if I personally know them.
Currently, my girlfriend has the ability to shut down the server temporarily in case something happens to me and I can no longer monitor it. This means that even in the event I cannot monitor it, the server will be ok.
In short, my server is heavily monitored.
A quick bit of advice, from me to you
As a general rule to you all, honestly unless this app gets better, I would leave, or stick to a small friend circle. It has been like this for the entire time I have been here (a year and a half ish, not including the time that passed since I left), and it has only gotten worse. The majority of the people here are kind, but the few who aren't, will break you eventually. I know what its like to be in your shoes, fresh, maybe even new, and thinking it wont ever be you in my place. But it will. Sooner or later you will grow enough to become a target, or you will stay small enough to watch everyone you know leave from the stress.
My last farewell
If you read this far, either this means that you do in fact want to hear this, or your unfortunately going to use this as ammo.
To those who stayed to simply read this, I do want to thank you. I understand to a small degree why you may still have some distrust in me, I cannot blame you with how some people are on this app. However, I appreciate that you at least have the human decency of listening, whether or not you believe it.
And for those who stayed to use this as ammo, just know I will not be responding to threats, or anything that is meant to rile me up. If you have a genuine question, feel free to message me, or comment on this post. Otherwise those who simply are responding with anything beyond that, I will not listen to, and will even block.
If you do have questions, I will be on here off and on throughout the week to respond. Unless I have a good reason to keep responding, I will most likely fully disappear after the end of the month. If you want to continue to talk to me beyond that, DM me for my discord.
Also, I understand you may be sad not to get some endings of my stories. If you DM me on discord, Ill be more than happy to keep you updated with any that you would like.
Thank you for those who have been kind to me here. There are so many people that have been wonderful to me, and who I would consider friends. Please know that you have been a good bit of my life, and that I am forever grateful.
Right now, I am in a good place in life. I have an amazing girlfriend, who loves me for all I am. I am at a weird, but good school for the job I want. I have a dog, cat, and parents who support me. I have a life, that I no longer want to shy away from. So to those who are worried about me, please do not be. I am grateful for the time spent here, and the people I met along the way, but know that I am taking a new path, not on here.
Thank you all, and have a good day :)