#nnaise

[halfwaycj]

I HATE MAYONNAISE. I AM SO DONE WITH IT.

• the concept

• the texture

• THE EXECUTION

The only thing I will allow between my two holy pieces of gluten free wheat bread from now on is thickened cow piss

Just the other day I was holding a plate that had mayonnaise on it and my finger brushed the mayonnaisse and I nearly

Dropped the fucking plate

I thought I had escaped its hard boiled clutches until my mother kindly made our family a nice salad

Of which I was very excited for

Until CRUNCH

Mayonnaise dressing

F UC K

If I even smell another opened container of Satan’s unspeakable excrement I will power puke into the nearest available egg carton

[impendingdoomba]

Imagine:

You, lying naked on a bearskin rug, glistening with baby oil

Me, ignoring you completely and drinking mayonnaise straight from the bottle.

Delicious.

[n0wherenebula]

mayonnaise

[sumbacky]

do people pronounce lmao as el em aye oh because i say it as lemayo