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look its the lifeguard from ocean city.
ok i posted this a while a go but i deleted it and maggie didnt get to read it so DNT LOOK AT MY FEELINGS
I don't really know where to start. I was just an innocent kid going to school like everyone else. I never did anything bad to anyone. I was just different-
I talked about different things than they did. They thought I was weird. I was like how Lilo was in Lilo and Stitch. My hair was short and choppy while everyone had long flowing locks. I was sensitive and I cried about everything. If those things were changed, nobody would have made fun of me. If nobody made fun of me, there was a chance of me having a normal childhood.
My teachers even hated me, too. They'd call me out in class all the time. School was torture for me. I'd sit alone a lot of the time (sometimes I'd play with other kids) or I'd be spending recess with the teacher. I wasn't the best behaved kid, and people hated me for that, too. People called me a baby, an idiot, and told me nobody liked me. Groups of girls would laugh at me. I hated my life, and I never told anyone.
Just because that was years ago doesn't mean I forgot about it. It still haunts me today. It reflected on my social standards all the way through middle and highschool. Some people haven't let go of how I used to act when I was little.
Things got better in middle school. I was happy. But it wasn't true happiness. I had a constant pressure to fit in, because it was the first time in my life I did. It wasn't that great. I was either crying over boys or drama.
My personality isn't the best, either. So I'm usually pushed aside by people. I'm that one person in the back out of the spotlight that nobody cares about. Like an extra in a movie. When people make plans without me or something, I look fine about it. On the inside it's not that great. It hurts. I'm always forgotten by people and I mean the least to people. Some of my friends/old friends on the other hand, everyone loves them. They're gorgeous and have happy lives and are surrounded by people who love them, and I'm just there. Nobody thinks anything of me. I was never anbody's favorite. In the halls, nobody waves to me. Nobody decorates my locker on my birthday. I'm lonely. I don't sound like I have it bad, but loneliness hurts more than it sounds like it does. You have nobody to tell how you feel, if something exciting happens, if you have a secret. Nobody. My number of friends is dropping dramatically. I hate being who I am. I question why I was made as this person, and sometimes I just cry about it. Why was I given this personality? Why was I given bad luck? Why was I given this face?
I say I'm lonely, but I like being by myself at the same time. I separate myself from people because I despise everyone at school. I can't relate to any of them and their personalities are ratchet as fuck. The few people I talk to there even bug me sometimes.
Im on tumblr and i'm all about the boyz because I don't have anything else anymore. My parents think it's pathetic. But they don't get it. Whenever I tell them there's something wrong, they lecture me or ask me 1000 questions and it doesnt help. My mom's always out partying or smoking and im uncomfortable talking to my dad. I have much different views than him about everything. We don't agree at all.
I'm just done. Theres no way out. I need a fresh start. New people. People who don't know my past and can't judge for who I used to be.
This is the last straw.
if you only had 3 minutes to tell nick anything you've ever wanted, what would u say?
That I love him with every last fiber of my being. That I could never, ever, ever thank him enough for keeping me strong and helping me through every day of my life. That without him, I don't know where I'd be. That I want him to be happy always because more than anything on this planet, he deserves happiness and to live a long, happy life.
Ship: Jason djkfklasdasfhsad
let's play ask stephanie super personal questions
nobonezsmith replied to your video: i forgot to post this ha
ur perf
u ok
nobonezsmith replied to your chat: Me: All you did was forget my birthday it's...
keep being mad so he compliments u more and then at the end be like “aw its ok”
so like keep ignoring him???
its not ur birthday yet in chi but happy birthday im making u a long ass post when its 12 here ::)
ilysm ok